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About fourth

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    Senior Member

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  • Gender
  • Location
    Tiong Bahru

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  • Interests
    Massage, tui na, treatment.

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  • Height
    178 cm
  • Weight
    96 kg
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  1. i think fetishes are healthy as long as you don't impinge or violate another person's modesty ba..
  2. yours isn't an isolated incident. most of the time it is working girls with one too many abortions that will attract the unholy and their "wrath". it can be traumatic but mine was, well, shiok. lol
  3. What should I do?

    breaking away is probably the most difficult thing to do. looks like it's spiraling into an abyss and there's no way you can stop it :< apologies before hand first, cuz what you'll read next is basically a breakdown of what i think, which could be seen as judging. but whatever la, it's my 2 cents and i hope it'll be of help: 1. he likes you obviously. 2. he is in total control of the relationship. 3. he wants both his bf / gf and you at the same time, because he likes you (refer to point 1), a lot. 4. he probably likes you more than his bf / gf because: a. there's no baggage since he stated it clearly in the beginning and b. he finally bedded you. 5. reiteration of point 2: he is in TOTAL control of the relationship. this is downright cruel just because he knows he has control over you and that if it's anyone who would die for him, it's probably you. it MAY be because he doesn't want to hurt you hence he clarified that he only wishes to maintain as friends, but how i see it is, he doesn't want to lose his status quo wrt his existing relationship with his 正宫 and being greedy he doesn't want to lose you too. Well... it could also be because he likes you just that he's not saying it for fear of complications, and this is where both you and him are at RIGHT now, or rather, the beginning of it. what's going to happen is: 1. it'll end up him cutting off everything with you for the sake of keeping his main relationship and 2. you losing your sanity and with your heart in pieces. what i'm going to suggest is: 1. be brave, and see this wayward relationship through the end. get it over and done with, and it may be a few months to even years. heck, it took me 10 years. or, you could 2. learn mindfulness meditation. it will do you wonders, and it'll save you from massive heartache and disappointment. if you do and learn it right, it'll help you recover and move on faster. the above 2 are the only possible options. yes, you always have a choice, but i don't think breaking away helps. people come together regardless of reason and regardless if it's good or bad. if you are into the notion of past lives, it's probably not the first (nor the last) time you guys have met and something happened. it almost always is a continuation and hence that's why i think cold turkey isn't going to help. you just have to see to the finish of this. be brave!
  4. Silent Hero (For HIV)

    i think you should tell us more about who you guys are / or your organization. =)
  5. I think it is perfectly fine and please, don't hv to feel guilty. Just be careful =) many moons ago I used to frequent tiong bahru plaza 5 / 6th floor. The understall scene there was off the charts! Not sure about now cuz the main door has been removed to Walk In kind of entrance.
  6. tankew = ) come again so i can confirm it's you : p hehe
  7. feeling all the love ^__^ *happy*
  8. hi everyone, my SIM is damaged, so please whatsapp me at +65 9699-6598 instead of SMS-ing. or you could SMS to 8828-5777 (but not whatsapp). the SIM replacement will be done on Monday. Apologies for the inconvenience caused
  9. i think if he is undetectable, then in actual fact he is safer than anonymous sex with someone whom you have no idea what his status is.
  10. it started at 7am and ended at 2am. that was the max. since then, the max i would limit to under 8 or 9. some are treatment sessions, not all are massage. a large part of my practice are treatments revolving around 跌打, 调骨. if i'm doing mainly massage, then yes i would put in more time in btwn clients as they need to change up, shower, etc. also, if it's 10 to 15 minutes, that's usually a follow up treatment session and it's usually only about 20 to 40 minutes, and never the full hour. if you realized, i don't charge $65 for follow up sessions, and it is always prorated. what i'll do in the future is, i'll always ensure that i set the expectations right so people won't feel what you felt. i guess it isn't nice coming in expecting a full hour but to find it being done within 30 minutes. truth is, i don't want to take a full hour to solve your issues if it takes me only 10 to 20 minutes. that's just not right. i'd rather solve your issues, earn less, and move on to the next client. part of my goal is to make better treatments available and more affordable to the general public at a price that's much lower than the establishments out there such as Ma Kuang or 拳器道. hence no matter what you don't see me raising prices for treatment sessions. $45 for lower back issues, and $35 to $40 for other issues, which is way below what the establishments charge. i have had people hopping over from a nearby hospital's a&e cuz they took forever to fix a dislocation and frankly speaking whoever's on duty had no idea what they were doing. sometimes if the follow up treatment is less than 10 minutes, i don't even take a single cent. i don't dare say that i provide good service all the time. there were times i know it was not as good as others, and being frank here, i'm not a robot. i give my max at that point in time and if that max isn't good enough for some, and if i lose the person, seriously, what can i do if they choose not to come back? at the end of the day, as much as it is a service that i provide to everyone out there, it is also a business. you gain some, you lose some. so i think it is a good chance to tell everyone that you have my utmost concentration for treatment sessions - because those are the sessions i cannot afford to make any mistakes, especially when it comes to slip disc management and adjustments but if you are here for massage, i wouldn't place too much focus on your injured areas (very often, they don't really want me to focus on them too much) unless prior discussed and agreed. so, yes. i think it'll be a good practice to set expectations right from the beginning. i'll incorporate that from now on =) at the same time, it is common for masseurs to give discounts to their clients without them realizing it. but over time, some clients may take that for granted. we are all human beings but i tend to be allergic to people who are anal (not saying you) and in those situations, it is good riddance. i had a client who always haggle for discounts and after a while i just blocked him completely. it's not an issue of whether he should respect my profession, or not: i don't have misplaced expectations like that. if it annoys me enough, i'll just block. i have many clients from blowing wind and all of you are wonderful =) but at the same time i also have straight clients as well as lotsa female clients coming in for treatments sessions / massage. cheers! ming
  11. well, you hit the nail on the head. it is both, i feel. of course on the surface, no one would ever admit that it is because of being excluded. but if you look deeper, the prospect of being able to find someone to get high on meth with you is certainly confirmed and without doubt. on top of that, the heightened hedonistic romp? couldn't get any better. i don't think these thoughts come across as their eventual goal; it's happens more on a subconscious level.
  12. The scary thing is, some of them are looking to be pozzed up. Though it's really very rare in sg.
  13. it doesnt solve the problem at all. it'll just sweep it under the rug. we have to face it that the sex culture within the gay community is very much the pinnacle of any sexual experience. hot guy meets hot guy and ends up having hot sex. to greatly amplify that experience and to gratify each others' hot body, they use recreational chemicals. it used to be ecstasy, but ecstasy didn't make people throw away their condoms. but meth? meth did. so now the usual story goes like this: lowered inhibitions, screwed for hours, days, got bred, and became positive. we have seen it too many times. i have friends and acquaintances who have indulged in this. some are really recreational users; that is, they know when to stop, and is able to stop. however, some never climb out of it and landed up in reform. those that are too deep in meth use, trust me, it got really, really, really bad. lost the best job they have ever had. psychosis destroyed almost all relationships. some became manipulative and started to blackmail people and were really hostile. meth is one thing that i'll never ever touch again after having experienced it 8 years ago (i'm not encouraging drug use. i'm really just sharing my own experience). it is true that when you're on meth, you tend to bond better, sympathize better, and therefore, easier to approach and easy to talk to. the users tend to be a lot less judgmental than the average gay man. imagine an average joe who's keen to be acquainted with this hot guy of his dreams, and he finally pluck up enough courage to message him on Grindr. and then, what usually wouldn't have happened, just because the user is high on meth, he engages in a chatty conversation with the guy. what happens next? the lure is too much for him to resist. he hops on the fastest uber to his place, and after he gets naked, he gets offered the pipe, to just "give it a try", and the rest is history since the sex with the man of your dreams is almost always mind blowing, meth or not. of course not every story begins this way. some use it because their sex buddies are using it, or that their bfs are using it. some are just addicted to sex, and are seeking greater amplifications in their hedonistic pursuit. do take note that i'm not judging anyone. i'm only laying out the personal stories that i have encountered. i have lost friends to meth. they were totally destroyed. two passed on (from a cocktail of drugs). again, i'm not encouraging drug use, but nothing destroys as much as meth. i don't care if you touch other stuff, just steer clear from meth. and the ones who have pulled back, it's always a sensitive topic to talk about. even i, as outspoken and as straightforward as i am, tend to shy away from bringing up uneasy topics cuz most of the time it'd just come across as preachy, and then the opposite effects are achieved instead of convincing them to steer clear. from my own observation, CF was exploding with lotsa users a few years ago, but recently i don't see as much of it as before. and that, CF people only go for their own kind. for the poz guys who are still using meth but who are on medication, my guess is, since they are alrdy poz and undetectable, where's the harm in engaging in unprotected sex with their own kind? they almost always keep it within their own circle when it comes to looking for casual fun, cuz the look and rejection that they get from others is not something one is able to accept and face every day.
  14. i think everyone has their down times. hope he'll come back someday cuz he does give a great massage.
  15. i usually stick to the clock, and i rarely go over time, i have to admit. i'm just trying to accommodate as much people as possible. no matter what, even though i stick to the clock, and even if i end early, it would be a few minutes at max, and won't go beyond 3 minutes. in my max capacity i have taken 13 clients in one day. but very often i stick to the clock is because i'm trying to fit everyone in, esp when 3 or 4 clients text me for the same time slot. during peak hours i don't even get time to rest in between. so if it makes you feel rushed, then here's my apology: i'm sorry, and i'm sorry it didn't turn out the way you would like. and in the situation if it's a follow up treatment session, i would usually say in advance that it'll be a follow up, and when the job is done, the session ends. if this is where the miscomm arises, then i'm happy to talk about it =) for special sessions like manhood therapy or tummy slimming, it isn't always up to the clock. as long as the intended effects are achieved (such as improved blood and chi circulation), it is probably not ideal to carry on beyond what is necessary. yes sometimes i am late as i have quite a handful of outcalls, and traffic isn't always within command. and i will be late when the previous client is late, and this is a domino's effect as much as everyone tries to be on time as i usually have less than 10 to 15 minutes in btwn appts. Recently there's been family issues as well and i'm totally fine if people decide to leave and not come back if they think i have caused them inconvenience / short changed them / or for being late. in this line of work, we gain some, and it's inevitable that we (speaking for fellow masseurs) lose some as well. perhaps in the larger scale of things, there's just some other masseur out there who's better for you. i have lost clients before (3, to my knowledge), and they have made it known to me the reasons. if they think that i didn't respect them enough and they have decided to move on, then so be it and i wish them well. since then, one came back and i'm glad he gave me the chance to reconnect with him. and when i sing, it means i'm comfortable with you and i don't do that with everyone. then perhaps i was wrong to think that we got to the chummy level. lol my bad for assuming though. also, i wouldn't know who you are. if you'd like to message me personally, it'd be very much appreciated. i'm also fine if you don't =) and i'm always happy to keep mum. lemme know your preference and i'd be happy to oblige. it's just like tonight, i have to cancel two appts because a good client of mine passed away two days ago, and i'd like to be there for the wake as the family has decided to keep it short, and sending him for cremation tomorrow afternoon. i have given the reasons, and it is up to the clients to make of the situation; i can't and will not tell them what or how to think / decide. meanwhile, thanks for giving me a chance to clarify certain points too and i hope the rest of all you good guys out there who're reading this, to just tell it to me personally if i've done things that irk you. it is never in my ill intention to cause any discomfort. Cheers! Ming