karl Posted January 12, 2020 Report Share Posted January 12, 2020 It has been many years since I had posted in a Gay forum. The last gay forum I had visited was sgboy, which was later renamed trevvy. Now that I am in my thirties and coming back to look around, I realised that there are very little online venues for gay people to really find emotional and mental growth. Most of the online activities are about sex or other sexual activities, gone are the days where the gay community discuss about local issues and helping one another with relationship issues. We used to have more support online for a variety of issues. What happened to our community? are we really heading into a decadent future where we are just looking for sex? kwin, NSA chinese and RU-EZ 1 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wilfgene Posted January 12, 2020 Report Share Posted January 12, 2020 (edited) Remind me of the ex-moderator opting-out, citing the same issue. Care to contribute to change it? Or just self-reflect on why you overlook what you overlook? For instance "caught between a rock and a hard place", "advice for virgin' threads and etc. Edited January 12, 2020 by wilfgene Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
firefight Posted January 13, 2020 Report Share Posted January 13, 2020 14 hours ago, karl said: It has been many years since I had posted in a Gay forum. The last gay forum I had visited was sgboy, which was later renamed trevvy. Now that I am in my thirties and coming back to look around, I realised that there are very little online venues for gay people to really find emotional and mental growth. Most of the online activities are about sex or other sexual activities, gone are the days where the gay community discuss about local issues and helping one another with relationship issues. We used to have more support online for a variety of issues. What happened to our community? are we really heading into a decadent future where we are just looking for sex? You could take some time to find the people who are like minded like you. There are many many of such. It isn't that difficult. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hahaha Posted January 13, 2020 Report Share Posted January 13, 2020 There's decent people around, just hard to find Quote You’re not alone. If you’d like to speak to someone, help is available at the following centres: Samaritans of Singapore (SOS) 24-hour Hotline: 1800 221 4444 or pat@sos.org.sg. Institute of Mental Health’s 24-hour Hotline: 6389 2222 Care Corner Counselling Centre (English and Mandarin): 6353 1180 Singapore Association for Mental Health: 1800 283 7019 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karl Posted January 13, 2020 Author Report Share Posted January 13, 2020 9 hours ago, firefight said: You could take some time to find the people who are like minded like you. There are many many of such. It isn't that difficult. I met a younger guy recently and he was just telling me how hard it is to have a circle of friends who are not just into sex. I tried in the past few days to just explore some online venues and platforms..... most of the time, it's really just about sex, it's picture of yourself and your bod, what position or fetish do you have...... After a while I can't help but to realise that these are the very initial exposures that most of our younger generation will encounter, that being gay is about how you look, about the enjoyment of sex and the lust..... It doesn't help in us being a credible community as well.... NSA chinese and Curious81 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
firefight Posted January 14, 2020 Report Share Posted January 14, 2020 12 hours ago, karl said: I met a younger guy recently and he was just telling me how hard it is to have a circle of friends who are not just into sex. I tried in the past few days to just explore some online venues and platforms..... most of the time, it's really just about sex, it's picture of yourself and your bod, what position or fetish do you have...... After a while I can't help but to realise that these are the very initial exposures that most of our younger generation will encounter, that being gay is about how you look, about the enjoyment of sex and the lust..... It doesn't help in us being a credible community as well.... I agree with you but I also have come across guys who get the idea like you, fast. Reality is that there is a big percentage of people into fun/sex as you have already encountered. On the other hand I do have many faithfully attached (at least they don't go around looking for/adding FWBs) friends so I believe we are able to hold this up for the upcoming group of youngsters looking to forge their identity and find a comfortable way of living. Let's just keep looking out for similar minded people and band them up for a better cause! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amuse.ed Posted January 14, 2020 Report Share Posted January 14, 2020 I personally feel that BW has created a platform for individuals who are unable to discuss freely what the state has deemed sensitive in nature. I appreciate such platform in fact and that what attracted me to this forum. And I learn and still learning so much on the perceptions on sexuality and sex via here. I also trust that readers or contributors regardless do have the wisdom to talk about serious matters as well. Keep up the good work BW! 😊 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wilfgene Posted January 14, 2020 Report Share Posted January 14, 2020 11 hours ago, amuse.ed said: I personally feel that BW has created a platform for individuals who are unable to discuss freely what the state has deemed sensitive in nature. I appreciate such platform in fact and that what attracted me to this forum. And I learn and still learning so much on the perceptions on sexuality and sex via here. I also trust that readers or contributors regardless do have the wisdom to talk about serious matters as well. Keep up the good work BW! 😊 You may care to not try to forget the hot thread being vanished, liked "Malaysian GE 2018". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amuse.ed Posted January 17, 2020 Report Share Posted January 17, 2020 On 1/15/2020 at 1:55 AM, wilfgene said: You may care to not try to forget the hot thread being vanished, liked "Malaysian GE 2018". Bopian. It's one of the house rules but yet politics is an important element at our macrosystem level as this is often people who formulate policies that will in turn affects our daily lives. Peace! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amuse.ed Posted January 17, 2020 Report Share Posted January 17, 2020 2 hours ago, Since u r here said: i dont think it is just occuring for Politics Anyway, it is also unhealthy due to stalkers and kaypos in the forum, it is alwys the humans or net warriors who tainted the image of the forum or community many kaypos come and view your page but went silence , not sure for what?!??! they tot we are invisible to them for their stalking? if not they pretend to ask u a qn, how are u, where r u? where have u been and then for?? whether m i silenced or NOT, u can personally contact me and there is no such need to PUBLISH your fake concerns oNLINE!! i dont even know anyone online this is how kaypo and stalking-capable people here are lol. Frankly speaking it took me awhile before coming onboard. Yes I was once a stalker and kaypo but more of reading the forum bah. Anyway there's always room to infer in terms of sensitive topics but wonder who dares to try it. Oops! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amuse.ed Posted January 17, 2020 Report Share Posted January 17, 2020 10 hours ago, Since u r here said: Problem is before we cross the line into sensitive topics, the subject will soon be removed..... but some people will never be removed , not sure why though They will make a comeback with a different account or guest even after removal bah. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amuse.ed Posted January 18, 2020 Report Share Posted January 18, 2020 16 minutes ago, Since u r here said: we are able to spot those by the same IP and blocked them mah But again there are other ways to resurface so if they wish to project, displace just let them do so. My stance is to ignore if not three engagements via PM, failing which this person will be totally out of my life. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
forbidd3n Posted February 1, 2020 Report Share Posted February 1, 2020 On 1/13/2020 at 1:46 PM, appboy said: Find your buddies and friends in these non-sexual interest groups. 👻 HeadLes Models & Talents Agency - Be our headless Social Influencer (NEW!) https://t.me/joinchat/OBjKykYac2kZQCGz_eD4PQ 👔 Jobs Buddy: Pink help Pink - Part-time / Freelance / Contract Jobs (NEW!) https://t.me/joinchat/OBjKyksc3SxbD5hdmZFQBA 🐠 Swim Squad - Meet & Swim https://t.me/joinchat/OBjKylSyFJckuJw6akzQuA 🐹 HIIT Me Up & Army Days Club - Gym Rats, Jaccuzi & Steam Room Lovers | ICT & RT Meet-up https://t.me/joinchat/OBjKylbRNDb6zNIRx3WmMg 💰 Finance Knowledge for Saving & Investing - No 💲 No Honey 🍯 https://t.me/joinchat/OBjKyk7VRS3d1YBFL2SDhA 💚 Fetish & Fashion Lovers - Buy / Sell Pre-loved Boy Stuff https://t.me/joinchat/OBjKylZ24OLGbPyg6PYJ7g 🍎 Men’s Health Magazine - Eat, Sleep, Play, JO https://t.me/joinchat/OBjKykHgYG0PNgS7bHavLQ ✈ Travel Buddy Flying Club - Why travel alone when YOLO? https://t.me/joinchat/OBjKyknq-UHrtXXxWaGrnA 🐷 Cheapskate Club - Deal Alerts, Freebies, Giveaways & Food Delivery Promo Codes https://t.me/joinchat/OBjKyhEie_NJDO9vlrw-ZA *No porn or affiliated links is allowed. Let's keep it decent. I don't want this group to get banned. If anyone feels self-entilted, feel free to leave. I'll not hesitate to remove you for disturbing the peace and harmony. Nobody owns nobody anything... Are there any sports interest group such as badminton, table tennis, bowling etc? Looking to join one, if there's any. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kimochi Posted February 1, 2020 Report Share Posted February 1, 2020 3 minutes ago, forbidd3n said: Are there any sports interest group such as badminton, table tennis, bowling etc? Looking to join one, if there's any. There's Facebook group called "out in SG" many activities. Join them ClosureEssentials 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NerdyGeek Posted March 8, 2020 Report Share Posted March 8, 2020 On 2/2/2020 at 12:35 AM, Kimochi said: There's Facebook group called "out in SG" many activities. Join them Are they a gay community or general one? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kimochi Posted March 8, 2020 Report Share Posted March 8, 2020 (edited) 8 minutes ago, NerdyGeek said: Are they a gay community or general one? Gay community. LGBT Edited March 8, 2020 by Kimochi NerdyGeek 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SensualMassage_T Posted March 9, 2020 Report Share Posted March 9, 2020 Pink Dot? Quote Contact | 012 4173134 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amuse.ed Posted March 9, 2020 Report Share Posted March 9, 2020 12 hours ago, Kimochi said: Gay community. LGBT There are QI too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve5380 Posted January 24, 2022 Report Share Posted January 24, 2022 On 1/12/2020 at 9:33 AM, karl said: It has been many years since I had posted in a Gay forum. The last gay forum I had visited was sgboy, which was later renamed trevvy. Now that I am in my thirties and coming back to look around, I realised that there are very little online venues for gay people to really find emotional and mental growth. Most of the online activities are about sex or other sexual activities, gone are the days where the gay community discuss about local issues and helping one another with relationship issues. We used to have more support online for a variety of issues. What happened to our community? are we really heading into a decadent future where we are just looking for sex? Isn't BW today one venue where local issues, world issues, mutual help with relational issues, AND sex and other sexual activities are discussed? It has even attracted people from the other side of your side of the world, like from Houston USA! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BudakFit Posted January 25, 2022 Report Share Posted January 25, 2022 Honestly, NO. There is lot we have to learn. The love is still not there kinda all for the media purposes.... And everyone can be organizer. It is matter how well patience you are...and provide something interesting experiences that they be interested at. I am non profit organizer. Objective more to make friends. I don't make any money but it is worth the time n efforts. For example my past coffee sessions. Regrets is that when it gets to big you cant handle different kinds of suggestion in place. So you see as we going to future....gays bi..etc...getting more picky....etc... So as for now do it from your heart and don't give a fuck whoever judges you...when the person meet then he will know how much sincere you giving to it.. Life is not about impressed anyone out there but based on your objectives...making a difference no matter how small it is.... Chinsyome and jetjetjet87 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
begleitung Posted May 20, 2022 Report Share Posted May 20, 2022 Good luck Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post bluerunner Posted May 21, 2022 Popular Post Report Share Posted May 21, 2022 Not all gay men are interested in sex only. Telegram groups you see in BW are mostly quite dead if not sex-theme oriented. Behind all these sex-theme groups, there are many more subtle and quiet groups, I strongly believe. Many years back, there was ADLUS. Members there organised sports activities (running, swimming and trekking were a few of the popular ones.) and also non-sports activities like KL tours, which were popular, camping or just ‘eating’ gathering. Sad to say that people do get old and there is no new blood who are willing/interested to continue with those activities. Gay does not equate to SEX. What you are seeing is just a tip of the iceberg. Continue to search’s done explore. Hope that you will find the group you are looking for soon. Good luck. fetish69, Balestier, Sh3rlock and 2 others 3 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve5380 Posted August 14, 2022 Report Share Posted August 14, 2022 On 1/12/2020 at 9:33 AM, karl said: It has been many years since I had posted in a Gay forum. The last gay forum I had visited was sgboy, which was later renamed trevvy. Now that I am in my thirties and coming back to look around, I realised that there are very little online venues for gay people to really find emotional and mental growth. Most of the online activities are about sex or other sexual activities, gone are the days where the gay community discuss about local issues and helping one another with relationship issues. We used to have more support online for a variety of issues. What happened to our community? are we really heading into a decadent future where we are just looking for sex? You named this thread "... a healthy gay community...", but I don't think that your negativity is healthy. To begin with, what you need a "gay community" for if it is not associated with sex? For platonic things, a community does not need to be gay. Maybe it takes more than a look around after coming back to find gays to have the same interests as you have. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Angsanatree Posted September 20, 2022 Report Share Posted September 20, 2022 On 1/12/2020 at 11:33 PM, karl said: It has been many years since I had posted in a Gay forum. The last gay forum I had visited was sgboy, which was later renamed trevvy. Now that I am in my thirties and coming back to look around, I realised that there are very little online venues for gay people to really find emotional and mental growth. Most of the online activities are about sex or other sexual activities, gone are the days where the gay community discuss about local issues and helping one another with relationship issues. We used to have more support online for a variety of issues. What happened to our community? are we really heading into a decadent future where we are just looking for sex? I remember SgBoy. BlowingWind existed during that time, and the reason I preferred SgBoy, was as you mentioned: more community-based, the forum participants were younger (my age then), it felt more wholesome, due to the moderators there being quick to ban trolls and remove their messages. BW, on the other hand, was specifically for mature men, the place to read about encounters, saunas, and oftentimes members pick fights, argue and bicker. The topics and forum participants were and are, to me, more seedy and capricious. After Sgboy/Trevvy went downhill, everyone migrated here, so it's no longer a mature-men's forum. I admit I got frustrated at how juvenile some topics were created by the (now) younger group. Yet, the mesh of opinions and experiences had then contributed to this current culture - which has a seedy-slant, which I feel is not nurturing or positive for young people, especially those who are still figuring themselves out. Sex, encounters and saunas, those belong to just one aspect of of gay life, but it's understandably more attractive and exciting to young people. So these topics gain more participation, and this adds to the culture in BW. BW is what it is. This is just what I observe. Perhaps our young people would benefit more holistically from international forums like Reddit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mike_amk Posted September 20, 2022 Report Share Posted September 20, 2022 Likewise, I too started on sgboy/trevvy, fridae... and eventually BW, and a couple of foreign online groups while living abroad. Gay life over there had a communal vibe, and rather normal activities where your non gay friends could join in in friendship. Over here, we've only just been let out of the cage... and we hear mostly of the term "gay lifestyle" ...as I've observed this "style" appears more guided by the endless hours on xtube or boyfriend TV, etc...rather than having a regular life balanced with a healthy and grounded gay mindset in tune with your community(s). I can only hope the lgbt community here in Sg grows up, as we have a fast ageing gay community too... are our young boys going to help out our gay daddies or soon to be Grandpas? Where is the lgbt community network, Rainbow retirement communities or nursing homes... I have begun to worry about these late life situations for us in Sg. Should we search for such places outside of Sg upon Retirement... and walk into our sunset on a strange soil. I feel our lgbt community needs to discuss some serious issues facing the community.. yeh... SeX is fun... but Life is be Lived too. riverrobles 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JyT Posted September 23, 2022 Report Share Posted September 23, 2022 I hope they brought back trevvy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Behrhunter Posted September 23, 2022 Report Share Posted September 23, 2022 Unfortunately, most men are driven by their dicks straight or gay. So gays being men are biologically programmed to spread their seeds. I am not going to overthink this response and just pen out sporadic thoughts about this matter and is only my experience and thoughts. 1. I am so sorry to say that the days of having a close knitted somewhat platonic social groups are gone with the wind that was blown away by technology. Way before internet became prominent, gay individuals took a risk of exposing themselves in the hope that the other party was gay too. This bond was very difficult to find and once we connected we stuck together. This cute guy from another class keeps asking to join you for lunch frequently/ keep bumping into this guy in the swimming pool/accidentally meeting your classmate/cousin in Venom?... you strike a conversation you give each other mixed signals for months until one of you snap and decided to ask .. are you gay? Then came telnet then IRC then Fridae then SGBOY where we had outings, and it slowly became easier to meet other gays not much .. just slightly. Those groups hung out together, the blading gang/ADLUS/MAW/Safe Haven. Outings were somewhat preplanned and we hung out in McD if you were a poor student then or Starbucks if you were already working. The fact that the connection was so difficult to establish made it so much more valuable. ALL my friends whom I'm still keeping in touch with today was from that generation. Today, I can be sitting in Starbucks now and someone from the hotel across the street identified me as Less than 1KM away and messages me "wanna f**k?" These connections are so easy to make and thus the value has diminished. Unfortunately, I don't think it's fair to say that Trevvy has better topics, I recall having a missed connections area and several topics on cruising spots. To me the main differentiating factor is that this platform allows guest posts. There is no risk of being banned, heck even during the archaic age of IRC we used to IP ban disruptive members. There is no such risk here ... at any point of time I can create and post a Guest BL and point a million strange topics. And remember, many community driven social groups, if you were part of any of them, you should be aware are usually helmed by a small handful of people who make the effort time and money to keep it alive, to moderate the content, keep the platform running. I would dare say the same as BW. And most of the time they do not get any appreciation for it. amuse.ed, bodybuildMLY, Phil and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IkuTube Posted September 24, 2022 Report Share Posted September 24, 2022 On 9/23/2022 at 4:38 PM, Behrhunter said: And remember, many community driven social groups, if you were part of any of them, you should be aware are usually helmed by a small handful of people who make the effort time and money to keep it alive, to moderate the content, keep the platform running. I would dare say the same as BW. And most of the time they do not get any appreciation for it. Aww, that is such a nice paragraph . Thank you for your contribution to the Forum. Enjoy your stay here. Behrhunter and bodybuildMLY 1 1 Quote Click Here To Visit My Blog @ "The Blessed Life" *Let me live my life to be an instrument of 'Love', in how I speak and in how I see others* - May there be Love and Peace beyond all understanding - Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve5380 Posted October 18, 2022 Report Share Posted October 18, 2022 On 9/23/2022 at 3:38 AM, Behrhunter said: Unfortunately, I don't think it's fair to say that Trevvy has better topics, I recall having a missed connections area and several topics on cruising spots. To me the main differentiating factor is that this platform allows guest posts. There is no risk of being banned, heck even during the archaic age of IRC we used to IP ban disruptive members. There is no such risk here ... at any point of time I can create and post a Guest BL and point a million strange topics. And remember, many community driven social groups, if you were part of any of them, you should be aware are usually helmed by a small handful of people who make the effort time and money to keep it alive, to moderate the content, keep the platform running. I would dare say the same as BW. And most of the time they do not get any appreciation for it. I remember that Trevvy had some good topics in its forum, a fertile ground for interesting discussions. I am not sure of what let to its demise. But most forums have good and bad topics, this is very subjective. I also find that allowing guest posts is a nice feature of BW. Here I disagree with many co-members who blame guests for a lot of ills. I notice very little abuse by guests, given their large potential to do so. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
repressednerd Posted November 14, 2022 Report Share Posted November 14, 2022 Not at all from my observation: - gay bar crowds are clique-ish - most don't talk to you unless they need something from you, or you got something worth their time - community groups are quite fragmented, despite the 'solidarity' shown on social media - some form of disagreement even within the same community groups - seen a number of suicides each year in the community due to depression (also influenced by loneliness) When I read about life as an LGBTQ+ person in the 90s and 00s, it feels like a rather different world, like an alternate universe. mike_amk 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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