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I have feelings for my friend...


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Enjoy your good time with your friend and hopefully it becomes the start of a long relationship.

 

Don't underestimate the gesture of your friend revealing to you that he is HIV+.  This is a BIG giveaway of his nature, his character.  It reminds me of how impressed I was with my late bf when he revealed to me that he was HIV+ a short time after we started dating. I discarded any problem with that, and a while later when he was fired from his job for being gay he came to live with me.  And so I lived for 21 years with a HIV+ bf without any problems. We didn't have anal sex, which neither of us missed.  After some time with new antiviral medicines he became undetectable, which further removed any risk, but that was not even necessary. 

 

Not only was the HIV+ not a problem,  but him revealing it started his conquest of my heart together with other traits of his special character.  And so we lived together until death did us part.   I feel so blessed that by having had the education to dismiss the HIV issue I gained a relationship that I might not have found in my life otherwise.

 

You could advise your friend that his status of HIV+ is not a reason to be disqualified as boyfriend.  He surely will like that! :) 

.

Edited by Steve5380
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7 hours ago, Steve5380 said:

Enjoy your good time with your friend and hopefully it becomes the start of a long relationship.

 

Don't underestimate the gesture of your friend revealing to you that he is HIV+.  This is a BIG giveaway of his nature, his character.  It reminds me of how impressed I was with my late bf when he revealed to me that he was HIV+ a short time after we started dating. I discarded any problem with that, and a while later when he was fired from his job for being gay he came to live with me.  And so I lived for 21 years with a HIV+ bf without any problems. We didn't have anal sex, which neither of us missed.  After some time with new antiviral medicines he became undetectable, which further removed any risk, but that was not even necessary. 

 

Not only was the HIV+ not a problem,  but him revealing it started a conquer of my heart together with other traits of his unusual character.  And so we lived together until death did us part.   I feel so blessed that having had the education to dismiss the HIV issue I gained a relationship that I might not have found in my life otherwise.

 

You could advise your friend that his status of HIV+ is not a reason to be disqualified as boyfriend.  He surely will like that! :) 

Thanks for sharing with me your story and point of view! Im sorry to hear about your other half, but I bet you guys must have had a great time together! Yeah being HIV+ isnt really a big deal now that we have medicines to help control and to make it undetectable. 
 

K does sometimes get into an emotional state about being HIV+, thats when I have to jump in and be there for him. I just dont want him to see it as if he is a broken toy or anything. I still care for him and he knows that im willing to wait for him as long as he is ready, anytime.

 

So I guess we are just taking things slowly, but hopefully soon one day we can be together. Only time will tell.

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9 hours ago, Jernaldo said:

WARNING LONG MID NIGHT STORY - So both K and I started off as colleagues. We work in the same company, but different department. The company we work for is rather small, so we hangout often and as time passes.. I slowly developed feelings for him. Initially, I am pretty sure we dont have feelings for each other during our first impressions. We would hangout often during work, sometimes after work for dinners with other colleagues. Even our other colleagues will always tease us bout getting together, seeing how close or sweet we are. Most of the time, K will always "manja" with me, feed me food and etc. Its the small gestures that got me slowly attracted to him. There are even times where I would admire some guys on Insta just for fun, whether its about their good looks or big muscle... K will get jealous (up till today) and his inner Leo personality will just want to prove to me that he is as good as them.

 

Moving forward, I resigned from the company and we went on to a cameron trip together along with other ex colleagues who also have left the company. It was a fun trip, and it was during that time that I first time confessed my feelings to. All of us were drinking and we were playing a game where we would share and be honest about any questions thrown to us. My friends know that I am interested in K, but I have yet to confess that out. After confessing to K, I needed to get some air so I headed to the balcony. He then came along and it was just the two of us outside there. He told me, that he knew I had feelings for him for awhile now.. but its just not at the right timing. He is afraid of hurting me. We didnt get to talk much and I was still quite tipsy then to even react how I wanted to, so we went back in and continued playing games with our other friends.

 

It was in the next morning, I was sleeping on the floor while K was sleeping on the bed with another of our friend. He woke up and came to my bed to cuddle me. I know its not much but I felt loved and happy while cuddling with him. I even felt him kissing my neck as he cuddled me from behind. After awhile, I turned and faced him and he gently gave me a kiss on my forehead. It was the sweetest memory I had from my Cameron trip.

 

Ever since the Cameron trip, we have been chatting more often. Most of the time via WhatsApp or Insta messanger. Sometimes I would call him to chat with him about things as well. It was exactly 1 week after our Cameron trip, that I decided to hangout with K again. Like a date, where we would go gym, get dinner and watch a movie in the cinema. It was during that particular day that K shared with me the reason why he mentioned that my confession came at the wrong timing... its because he has something more important to deal with. So it turns out that he knew recently that he is a HIV positive patient and that he wants me to settle with someone better than him. On the same day, I was sober and I grew some balls to confessed to him again stating "I want to confess to you without the influence of any alcohol.. because I want you to know that I have feelings for you and its been awhile. I understand that you are going through a tough time now and I want to be there by your side, supporting you throughout this journey. Being HIV+ doesnt mean the end of the world, its just another lifestyle that you need to adapt to". He hasnt disclose this to anyone other than his family, bosses (need to explain the reason for going to the hospital numerous times for blood check), insurance agent and me. That is when I understand where he is coming from, that he wants us to be friends and for him to slowly accept the fact that he has to adapt to a new lifestyle.

 

Things have been progressing steadily between both of us. Whenever our friends asked if we are together, my answer will be "K and I are still friends. We want to take things slowly and I want to make sure that he is alright at the end of the day". Even last night, some of us including K went out together to a gay bar. It was a fun experience and both me and K got quite drunk. He drinks quite often so he sobers up quicker, whereas I rarely drink so basically I was a drunktard last night. I got so drunk to a point that I cant even move a muscle. So I had no choice but to sleepover at K's place. 

 

I can still remember even though being drunk, K did approach me and kissed me on the lips (just a peck) once. And while in the car (we carpooled together with others, K and I were sitting at the back seat), I rest my drunk head on K's shoulder. There were moments where he will just give me a soft kiss on my forehead and caress my face slowly. Even when I slept over at his place for the first time, we cuddled on his bed. I guess being drunk last night wasnt a bad idea after all haha. 

 

Its just that... I miss him alot. I do want to spend more time with him, and honestly sometimes I just wish he is more initiative with me. Because all these while, I have been the one who initiates most of our meet ups and activities. Sometimes I even wonder what he thinks of me... but overthinking always lands me on a negative side, so I try to avoid it. Feel free to leave your comments on what should I do next...

True story? Or fiction? 

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6 minutes ago, Jernaldo said:

Hmmm not really. Its not really something that I really prioritise at the moment with him. Its his company that I enjoy having, fun to hangout and I feel much happier whenever im with him.

Sounds so romantic ~go make his day then! 

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If this is a really true story, I think you should start taking PrEP on a regular, if not even daily, basis as soon as possible. This suggestion is not meant for you to take on reckless behavior. But it may take only one single slip-up at the spur of the moment for BOTH of you to end up in bad shape. Give that some thoughts. 

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19 minutes ago, Guest Guest said:

If this is a really true story, I think you should start taking PrEP on a regular, if not even daily, basis as soon as possible. This suggestion is not meant for you to take on reckless behavior. But it may take only one single slip-up at the spur of the moment for BOTH of you to end up in bad shape. Give that some thoughts. 

Yes this is a true story... Hmmm thanks for the advice. I did consider getting it previously but I didnt since I wasnt sexually active. Ill probably look into this the next time I check in with my regular doctor. Thanks! 

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16 minutes ago, Jernaldo said:

Yes this is a true story... Hmmm thanks for the advice. I did consider getting it previously but I didnt since I wasnt sexually active. Ill probably look into this the next time I check in with my regular doctor. Thanks! 

 

Please remember that PrEP is just ONE of the precautions you should take, and NOT the only precaution you should take.

 

Others forms of precautions include use of condoms  with reputable quality ( https://www.nytimes.com/2020/09/25/world/asia/vietnam-recycled-condoms.html ) and regular check ups after sexual activities, and not abusing drugs (https://www.drugabuse.gov/publications/drugfacts/drug-use-viral-infections-hiv-hepatitis) . 

 

 

 

 

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7 minutes ago, Guest Guest said:

 

Please remember that PrEP is just ONE of the precautions you should take, and NOT the only precaution you should take.

 

Others forms of precautions include use of condoms  with reputable quality ( https://www.nytimes.com/2020/09/25/world/asia/vietnam-recycled-condoms.html ) and regular check ups after sexual activities, and not abusing drugs (https://www.drugabuse.gov/publications/drugfacts/drug-use-viral-infections-hiv-hepatitis) . 

 

 

 

 

yeah I heard about the reusing of condom syndicate. Damn disgusting... But thanks for sharing with me about the drug facts article! ❤️ We havent explores sex yet but if we do one day, we will definitely take the necessary precautions. ❤️ 

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While I can't give you any constructive medical advice, here is just my take with your "honestly sometimes I just wish he is more initiative with me".

 

Sometimes, we often forget to think deeply for another person and empathize his situation because we are so concerned about ourselves.  Having said that, you do have a gentle sensitive side where you do want things to work out amicably.

 

Put yourself in K's shoe.  The trauma that he is going through with his (probably) guilt, shame, anxiety, troubled state of mind (mentally and emotionally).  The way I see it, K has comforted you in his actions (the cuddling, the kissing, etc).

 

In K's situation, I feel he needs a great sense of comfort.  He probably feels things within him are crumbling down.  HIV is still shunned by many.  Assure and prove to him that you can be there for him.  Example, offer him your service to accompany him for any medical appointments.  Do some research to tell him that it is not the end of the world.

 

All the best to you and K.

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1 hour ago, Guest Prayers said:

While I can't give you any constructive medical advice, here is just my take with your "honestly sometimes I just wish he is more initiative with me".

 

Sometimes, we often forget to think deeply for another person and empathize his situation because we are so concerned about ourselves.  Having said that, you do have a gentle sensitive side where you do want things to work out amicably.

 

Put yourself in K's shoe.  The trauma that he is going through with his (probably) guilt, shame, anxiety, troubled state of mind (mentally and emotionally).  The way I see it, K has comforted you in his actions (the cuddling, the kissing, etc).

 

In K's situation, I feel he needs a great sense of comfort.  He probably feels things within him are crumbling down.  HIV is still shunned by many.  Assure and prove to him that you can be there for him.  Example, offer him your service to accompany him for any medical appointments.  Do some research to tell him that it is not the end of the world.

 

All the best to you and K.

Greatly appreciate this piece of advice! Will try to ask him if I can accompany him to his treatment one day, im also curious what are the steps taken during the treatment.

 

Yeah, I think for now Ill just be patient and give him as much time as he need. He knows anyway that Ill be there for him anytime if he needs me 😂

 

He lives alone, so I guess the tendency and chances to overthink and get into a depress state is frequent too... if lockdown were to commence again, I really hope that he will hang on or if I can be there for him too...

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1 hour ago, Jernaldo said:

Greatly appreciate this piece of advice! Will try to ask him if I can accompany him to his treatment one day, im also curious what are the steps taken during the treatment.

 

Yeah, I think for now Ill just be patient and give him as much time as he need. He knows anyway that Ill be there for him anytime if he needs me 😂

 

He lives alone, so I guess the tendency and chances to overthink and get into a depress state is frequent too... if lockdown were to commence again, I really hope that he will hang on or if I can be there for him too...

 

Faith and Hope are two NLP verbal hygiene that can make things to happen.  All you need to do is to internalize them into your cellular consciousness.  

 

Look back into your text messages with him.  Were the messages mostly about you?  Should they were more directed to him, were the messages carried your deep concern into his well being? 

 

I know it is not fair that I disregard your feelings, but hey, you are the healthy one 🙂.  Plus, you were the proactive one to get K to know your interest when, what was important to K at that confessional day in Cameron Highland, K was more concerned about his health and all the psychological predicament surrounding it.

 

Just enjoy the moment, @Jernaldo.  Sometimes in life, there is always the timing for the right thing to happen.  Important, do not lose that Faith and that Hope.

 

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Dear Jernaldo,

 

It takes a lot of courage to go against the flow.

 

While you immense yourself, do take care and be prepared for anything that comes your way. 
 

Let no one tell you what’s right or wrong. Much less what should be. 
 

I wish you luck.

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2 hours ago, Guest Guest said:

Dear Jernaldo,

 

It takes a lot of courage to go against the flow.

 

While you immense yourself, do take care and be prepared for anything that comes your way. 
 

Let no one tell you what’s right or wrong. Much less what should be. 
 

I wish you luck.

Thanks!!! ☺️ Appreciate the support and motivation. 

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6 hours ago, Guest Prayers said:

 

Faith and Hope are two NLP verbal hygiene that can make things to happen.  All you need to do is to internalize them into your cellular consciousness.  

 

Look back into your text messages with him.  Were the messages mostly about you?  Should they were more directed to him, were the messages carried your deep concern into his well being? 

 

I know it is not fair that I disregard your feelings, but hey, you are the healthy one 🙂.  Plus, you were the proactive one to get K to know your interest when, what was important to K at that confessional day in Cameron Highland, K was more concerned about his health and all the psychological predicament surrounding it.

 

Just enjoy the moment, @Jernaldo.  Sometimes in life, there is always the timing for the right thing to happen.  Important, do not lose that Faith and that Hope.

 

Yeah... when I confessed to him, both sober and tipsy moment... looking back at it make me feel like a selfish person. Like someone who needed to confess without knowing the consequences. 
 

But at the same time, I want him to know ill always be there for him and im not giving up no matter how much he tries to make me find for someone “better” than him.

 

I do check up on him regularly, just to make sure he feels alright and knows that he doesnt have to go through this alone.

 

Gosh talking bout him now makes me miss him more haha

 

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10 hours ago, Jernaldo said:

Yeah... when I confessed to him, both sober and tipsy moment... looking back at it make me feel like a selfish person. Like someone who needed to confess without knowing the consequences. 
 

But at the same time, I want him to know ill always be there for him and im not giving up no matter how much he tries to make me find for someone “better” than him.

 

I do check up on him regularly, just to make sure he feels alright and knows that he doesnt have to go through this alone.

 

Gosh talking bout him now makes me miss him more haha

 

While you are young, you can get infatuated very easily. But while it is really nice to have you going lovey-dovey over him right now, you have to take into the account the inconsiderable amount of inconvenience and care you need to have if you stay with him. Imagine the loss he will feel if you lead him down a path while he had a glimmer of hope that he might be able to spend the rest of his life with you, only for you to leave him at the time that he needs you most. People have abandon their pets and even deserted their old parents for smaller matters. So are you really ready for such a life as a caretaker for such a long long time? Sometimes people dare not fall in love, because of the tremendous fear of disappointment that they will have to live through if it don't work out. And in such a case, unless you have resolve of steel, chances are such that you may leave him when things gets really bad. So, are you sure? The answer is not meant for us; Neither is it meant for you alone; This is an important answer for both you and him, but one which only you alone will know. 

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1 hour ago, Guest Guest said:

 

While you are young, you can get infatuated very easily. But while it is really nice to have you going lovey-dovey over him right now, you have to take into the account the inconsiderable amount of inconvenience and care you need to have if you stay with him. Imagine the loss he will feel if you lead him down a path while he had a glimmer of hope that he might be able to spend the rest of his life with you, only for you to leave him at the time that he needs you most. People have abandon their pets and even deserted their old parents for smaller matters. So are you really ready for such a life as a caretaker for such a long long time? Sometimes people dare not fall in love, because of the tremendous fear of disappointment that they will have to live through if it don't work out. And in such a case, unless you have resolve of steel, chances are such that you may leave him when things gets really bad. So, are you sure? The answer is not meant for us; Neither is it meant for you alone; This is an important answer for both you and him, but one which only you alone will know. 

Truthfully, I know that he is the one. I have never been so crazy over someone before. Back then I did develop my feelings for him, but because we were both working in the same company so low key we felt that its weird dating.

 

And I was actually with someone from Nov 2019 - July 2020... it didn’t work out. Maybe because we got together too quick and that my ex was someone who wants to be together just for the sake of the idea of being a “couple”, not love. 
 

I realised that I dont blame my ex for the entire relationship, it might also be just me that wanted to fill up the void of loneliness in me. 
 

Thats when I told K also, what happened between me and my Ex, probably is part my fault. Maybe I was desperate for a relationship and wanting to try something out with someone. And maybe because of Of the lockdown, me and K werent that close as we were back then. 
 

But when we started meeting up again in office, I always felt like... happier seeing and having him around. Its like something to look forward to. 
 

And its not like a rebound kind of thing, because its the same exact feeling that I had even before I started a relationship with my Ex.

 

So, thats when I realised that... At the end of the day, I still like K and I cant help with the feelings I have for him.

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2 hours ago, Jernaldo said:

Truthfully, I know that he is the one. I have never been so crazy over someone before. Back then I did develop my feelings for him, but because we were both working in the same company so low key we felt that its weird dating.

 

And I was actually with someone from Nov 2019 - July 2020... it didn’t work out. Maybe because we got together too quick and that my ex was someone who wants to be together just for the sake of the idea of being a “couple”, not love. 
 

I realised that I dont blame my ex for the entire relationship, it might also be just me that wanted to fill up the void of loneliness in me. 
 

Thats when I told K also, what happened between me and my Ex, probably is part my fault. Maybe I was desperate for a relationship and wanting to try something out with someone. And maybe because of Of the lockdown, me and K werent that close as we were back then. 
 

But when we started meeting up again in office, I always felt like... happier seeing and having him around. Its like something to look forward to. 
 

And its not like a rebound kind of thing, because its the same exact feeling that I had even before I started a relationship with my Ex.

 

So, thats when I realised that... At the end of the day, I still like K and I cant help with the feelings I have for him.

 

When love comes knocking into the soul, there is no right word that can really describe the feelings.  While the mind may want to justify with all reasonings, it is actually not necessary.  The thing to honour, in this situation, is to live in that moment, knowingly.  But, 'knowingly' is only for you to know, for you to realize, for you to accept, for you to surrender.  No others can dictate what will be the right thing.

 

When one embraces the feeling, that love that has come into your BE-ing, have some goals to work on.  Vision yourself how you want to build this love to be a forever-more thing - for you, for K and for the lives between the two of you.  While love is a wonderful thing, it also needs your understanding, your assurance, your commitment and your realization.  

 

LIve in your moment. Create the moment to be what your future holds for you, Jernaldo.

 

 

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Amazing story, and I am happy for the both of you.

 

It's no surprise you would expect some initiative from K, afterall, it gets a little tiring if you're the only one initiating and it feels like you're the one asking for things to happen, and there's no room for you to be passive and let him give you what you are looking for.

 

Like others said, perhaps K is still going through the phase and I believe he needs time, and perhaps he would stay passive forever, but that does not mean he doesn't love you the same way as you do. It just feels that the effort doesn't come two ways. Perhaps he fears rejection or do not want to be seen as someone who is clingy.

 

Trust and patience, and time will give you the solution you need to make things work for both of you!

Holy mama.

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2 hours ago, Gray32 said:

Amazing story, and I am happy for the both of you.

 

It's no surprise you would expect some initiative from K, afterall, it gets a little tiring if you're the only one initiating and it feels like you're the one asking for things to happen, and there's no room for you to be passive and let him give you what you are looking for.

 

Like others said, perhaps K is still going through the phase and I believe he needs time, and perhaps he would stay passive forever, but that does not mean he doesn't love you the same way as you do. It just feels that the effort doesn't come two ways. Perhaps he fears rejection or do not want to be seen as someone who is clingy.

 

Trust and patience, and time will give you the solution you need to make things work for both of you!

Thanks for reading and appreciate the advice! Yeah, I mean feeling his affections even if they are small is definitely a small step that makes me happy already.


Im grateful to hear your point of view and the assurance actually. I do trust him, and I want him to feel similarly. So im gonna give my best to him, always ☺️

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3 hours ago, Guest Prayers said:

 

When love comes knocking into the soul, there is no right word that can really describe the feelings.  While the mind may want to justify with all reasonings, it is actually not necessary.  The thing to honour, in this situation, is to live in that moment, knowingly.  But, 'knowingly' is only for you to know, for you to realize, for you to accept, for you to surrender.  No others can dictate what will be the right thing.

 

When one embraces the feeling, that love that has come into your BE-ing, have some goals to work on.  Vision yourself how you want to build this love to be a forever-more thing - for you, for K and for the lives between the two of you.  While love is a wonderful thing, it also needs your understanding, your assurance, your commitment and your realization.  

 

LIve in your moment. Create the moment to be what your future holds for you, Jernaldo.

 

 

Alrightyyy, will do my best. Im ready for that responsibility to give K the best!

 

we definitely need to work on alot of things, cause we did go through a lot of things before, with our exes and stuff... but most importantly, As you said, live in the moment and try to work things out as we go. Trial and error style. I know at this point im willing to go to the moon for him haha

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I have a story to share, but not a happy one.

 

Not too Long ago I started playing 狼人杀 game and get to know a number of new friends. We played almost Everyday since it is CB for us and also wfh. People who are familiar with the game or 娱乐百分百 will know the popular CP in Taiwan, so within the game he & I formed a pair of CP. from Using the game app to message to he ask my friend for my number to call me to play game. By the way He is a Malaysian, and since then we started what’s app each other and followed each other Instagram. I must say he is not handsome or what, at least not the type of guy I will love. But from all the interactions and having him flirting with me as we are a CP, slowly and unknowingly I fell in love with him. Of cos as a closet I keep it to myself, not knowing if he is one of us or straight. Of cos, I look through all the photos of his Instagram and no sign if he is attached so I assumed he is single. 
 

He will always send me good morning message, or rather we will send each other, talk a lot Everyday. I really love his voice and even out of the game group chat in our pm he will also continue to “play” with me or flirt/sweet talk me. 
 

somehow until one day when I slowly quit playing the game, he will tends to “forget” about me in WhatsApp. Forgot to reply, so somehow I felt ya he don’t like me, I better stay a distance from him and don’t fall in deep. but he will be so alert that 2days I did not talk to him and come and message me and say he forgot to reply me, ask me why he sense that I felt sad. U know the kind of sensitive feeling that not many will be able to sense. So I tell myself maybe he really miss out my message. So he continue to flirt with me. Days goes own and in our game group chat when he is talking to another friend unknowingly/intentionally he let me found out he is Attached (even I wasn’t 100% sure)!
 

I was greatly disappointed and sad and told myself that okay I shall stop all the flirting I ignore him in the group chat and be as cold to him as possible (my principle is to reply all message if it is directed to me). He sensed it, and put in the group chat that I ignore him and tagged me. I replied all the messages was not talking to me nothing to reply him. For a few days he will try talking and flirt with me ask him how am I etc. Then last Sunday I was contemplating to ask him he is attached and telling him I like him, I send him good morning message after several days not sending. He replied goodmorning but I have no courage to ask and confess.

 

the next day in the group chat somehow he ask me Guess if he is attached, cAnt remember what topic leads to that. I replied he is attached. He ignored and dint answer. So I reply that privately and ask him why he did not answer if I Guess correctly. Then he admitted yes he have been attached for 3years (I am so heart broken). I replied then me how? With 😭😭. He asked, if I really have feelings for him. I replied yes. 
 

this happened on Monday. I am still very sad now, past few days I did not sleep well, up till now. In the group chat I still need to pretend and talk like normal (flirt with each other) so others won’t suspect. Firstly I dint expect I will fall for someone when I never ever seen him, and I can fall for him so deep. 
 

ps for my Long bored and sad story. Maybe is a place for me to rant.

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9 minutes ago, sg89ailikesi said:

I have a story to share, but not a happy one.

 

Not too Long ago I started playing 狼人杀 game and get to know a number of new friends. We played almost Everyday since it is CB for us and also wfh. People who are familiar with the game or 娱乐百分百 will know the popular CP in Taiwan, so within the game he & I formed a pair of CP. from Using the game app to message to he ask my friend for my number to call me to play game. By the way He is a Malaysian, and since then we started what’s app each other and followed each other Instagram. I must say he is not handsome or what, at least not the type of guy I will love. But from all the interactions and having him flirting with me as we are a CP, slowly and unknowingly I fell in love with him. Of cos as a closet I keep it to myself, not knowing if he is one of us or straight. Of cos, I look through all the photos of his Instagram and no sign if he is attached so I assumed he is single. 
 

He will always send me good morning message, or rather we will send each other, talk a lot Everyday. I really love his voice and even out of the game group chat in our pm he will also continue to “play” with me or flirt/sweet talk me. 
 

somehow until one day when I slowly quit playing the game, he will tends to “forget” about me in WhatsApp. Forgot to reply, so somehow I felt ya he don’t like me, I better stay a distance from him and don’t fall in deep. but he will be so alert that 2days I did not talk to him and come and message me and say he forgot to reply me, ask me why he sense that I felt sad. U know the kind of sensitive feeling that not many will be able to sense. So I tell myself maybe he really miss out my message. So he continue to flirt with me. Days goes own and in our game group chat when he is talking to another friend unknowingly/intentionally he let me found out he is Attached (even I wasn’t 100% sure)!
 

I was greatly disappointed and sad and told myself that okay I shall stop all the flirting I ignore him in the group chat and be as cold to him as possible (my principle is to reply all message if it is directed to me). He sensed it, and put in the group chat that I ignore him and tagged me. I replied all the messages was not talking to me nothing to reply him. For a few days he will try talking and flirt with me ask him how am I etc. Then last Sunday I was contemplating to ask him he is attached and telling him I like him, I send him good morning message after several days not sending. He replied goodmorning but I have no courage to ask and confess.

 

the next day in the group chat somehow he ask me Guess if he is attached, cAnt remember what topic leads to that. I replied he is attached. He ignored and dint answer. So I reply that privately and ask him why he did not answer if I Guess correctly. Then he admitted yes he have been attached for 3years (I am so heart broken). I replied then me how? With 😭😭. He asked, if I really have feelings for him. I replied yes. 
 

this happened on Monday. I am still very sad now, past few days I did not sleep well, up till now. In the group chat I still need to pretend and talk like normal (flirt with each other) so others won’t suspect. Firstly I dint expect I will fall for someone when I never ever seen him, and I can fall for him so deep. 
 

ps for my Long bored and sad story. Maybe is a place for me to rant.

Such is life ~ 

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3 hours ago, sg89ailikesi said:

I have a story to share, but not a happy one.

 

Not too Long ago I started playing 狼人杀 game and get to know a number of new friends. We played almost Everyday since it is CB for us and also wfh. People who are familiar with the game or 娱乐百分百 will know the popular CP in Taiwan, so within the game he & I formed a pair of CP. from Using the game app to message to he ask my friend for my number to call me to play game. By the way He is a Malaysian, and since then we started what’s app each other and followed each other Instagram. I must say he is not handsome or what, at least not the type of guy I will love. But from all the interactions and having him flirting with me as we are a CP, slowly and unknowingly I fell in love with him. Of cos as a closet I keep it to myself, not knowing if he is one of us or straight. Of cos, I look through all the photos of his Instagram and no sign if he is attached so I assumed he is single. 
 

He will always send me good morning message, or rather we will send each other, talk a lot Everyday. I really love his voice and even out of the game group chat in our pm he will also continue to “play” with me or flirt/sweet talk me. 
 

somehow until one day when I slowly quit playing the game, he will tends to “forget” about me in WhatsApp. Forgot to reply, so somehow I felt ya he don’t like me, I better stay a distance from him and don’t fall in deep. but he will be so alert that 2days I did not talk to him and come and message me and say he forgot to reply me, ask me why he sense that I felt sad. U know the kind of sensitive feeling that not many will be able to sense. So I tell myself maybe he really miss out my message. So he continue to flirt with me. Days goes own and in our game group chat when he is talking to another friend unknowingly/intentionally he let me found out he is Attached (even I wasn’t 100% sure)!
 

I was greatly disappointed and sad and told myself that okay I shall stop all the flirting I ignore him in the group chat and be as cold to him as possible (my principle is to reply all message if it is directed to me). He sensed it, and put in the group chat that I ignore him and tagged me. I replied all the messages was not talking to me nothing to reply him. For a few days he will try talking and flirt with me ask him how am I etc. Then last Sunday I was contemplating to ask him he is attached and telling him I like him, I send him good morning message after several days not sending. He replied goodmorning but I have no courage to ask and confess.

 

the next day in the group chat somehow he ask me Guess if he is attached, cAnt remember what topic leads to that. I replied he is attached. He ignored and dint answer. So I reply that privately and ask him why he did not answer if I Guess correctly. Then he admitted yes he have been attached for 3years (I am so heart broken). I replied then me how? With 😭😭. He asked, if I really have feelings for him. I replied yes. 
 

this happened on Monday. I am still very sad now, past few days I did not sleep well, up till now. In the group chat I still need to pretend and talk like normal (flirt with each other) so others won’t suspect. Firstly I dint expect I will fall for someone when I never ever seen him, and I can fall for him so deep. 
 

ps for my Long bored and sad story. Maybe is a place for me to rant.

If a person is attached and yet kept his attachment a secret, then he is likely up to notti things, otherwise, why is there a need to hide?

And all those flirting, it's obvious now that he do like you, otherwise, I don't think he will waste his time flirting with you. But being attached, he won't tell you that he likes you but will keep flirting with you and give you a good impression until you eventually like him more. These type of people can't win you by their looks, they they charm you with their caring and attention. And eventually you fall for a "not handsome" person.

Let me be the bad person here.

I think you better wake up. You had put yourself in that position and he had played his game well. YOU had fallen for him. HE wins. You lose, and you lose big because you will be the 3rd party or maybe even 4th party.  He is certainly a player and he played you well.

Well, before you give your body and everything to him, please save whatever dignity you have and cut your ties with him because nothing good will come out of this. He certainly won't leave his 3 year relationship over someone he just flirts online. You are just a card he play and he got you. Who know how many other cards he had played.

 

You are sad and upset over someone you didn't even MEET or had physical contact with and you are already a wrack. If someone you actually met and had sex with you and you falls heads over heels with, you will kill yourself? I think you had been single for too long and you really need to get out more and meet real people and not stuck in cyberspace over virtual chats and online love.

 

Please stop all contact with him and cut your loses. He is NOT worth your time. He is just a player and he played you well. Go and find your happiness with someone who actually can meet and that truly cares for you.

 

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4 hours ago, GachiMuchi said:

If a person is attached and yet kept his attachment a secret, then he is likely up to notti things, otherwise, why is there a need to hide?

And all those flirting, it's obvious now that he do like you, otherwise, I don't think he will waste his time flirting with you. But being attached, he won't tell you that he likes you but will keep flirting with you and give you a good impression until you eventually like him more. These type of people can't win you by their looks, they they charm you with their caring and attention. And eventually you fall for a "not handsome" person.

Let me be the bad person here.

I think you better wake up. You had put yourself in that position and he had played his game well. YOU had fallen for him. HE wins. You lose, and you lose big because you will be the 3rd party or maybe even 4th party.  He is certainly a player and he played you well.

Well, before you give your body and everything to him, please save whatever dignity you have and cut your ties with him because nothing good will come out of this. He certainly won't leave his 3 year relationship over someone he just flirts online. You are just a card he play and he got you. Who know how many other cards he had played.

 

You are sad and upset over someone you didn't even MEET or had physical contact with and you are already a wrack. If someone you actually met and had sex with you and you falls heads over heels with, you will kill yourself? I think you had been single for too long and you really need to get out more and meet real people and not stuck in cyberspace over virtual chats and online love.

 

Please stop all contact with him and cut your loses. He is NOT worth your time. He is just a player and he played you well. Go and find your happiness with someone who actually can meet and that truly cares for you.

 

Thank you for your advices 🙂

 

yes initially I also think so why is there a need to hide 3 yrs relationship. But shock to know he is attached with a girl. I also don’t know why and is there a need to flirt with me. You are right that he had won the game well. I am sad not cos of never get to meet him or even have sex. Maybe is the period of not getting use of a person stepping out of my life when he had been there for the past few months. 
 

certainly I am trying to get use and avoid contacting him. It is unavoidable to be sad, all I need is time. 
 

thank you

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2 hours ago, sg89ailikesi said:

Thank you for your advices 🙂

 

yes initially I also think so why is there a need to hide 3 yrs relationship. But shock to know he is attached with a girl. I also don’t know why and is there a need to flirt with me. You are right that he had won the game well. I am sad not cos of never get to meet him or even have sex. Maybe is the period of not getting use of a person stepping out of my life when he had been there for the past few months. 
 

certainly I am trying to get use and avoid contacting him. It is unavoidable to be sad, all I need is time. 
 

thank you

 

The fact that he is possibly Bi, the more you should be far away from him. He will very likely marry his girlfriend and you, will have another big pain coming the day he announced he is getting married.  So, please, get out of this person's clutch and cut ALL ties with him. block him and leave the chat group.

 

Yes. in the mean time, give yourself time to heal. And seriously, ask yourself, why are you in such position? What is the root cause of you falling for such a person. It's certainly not the looks, so what was it? Were you hopeful and or a little desperate perhaps because you were single for too long? What was the thing that was attractive about him, his care and concern? his sweet words?  Knowing the cause and how you ended will help you be more careful the next time you meet someone who is so. Learn from your own mistake and learn to be sensitive to your six sense in telling you that these are danger signs and you might end up in a game and get yourself trapped. A lot of times, people became 小三 (3rd party) because they choose to be or sometimes they think they can change the person. but in the end, they realised that that was their fat hope. They have no one to blame but themselves for their choices.

 

You need to own up and take responsible for your own mistakes and learn from your mistakes and then regroup your feelings and collect your hurt emotions and move on with life because, there will be someone out there. Get out more and meet real people. Message your old friends and go drink coffee or makan with them. Don't stay home and wallow in your own sorrow. Go exercise and get yourself healthy and you will get better really soon.

 

 

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12 hours ago, sg89ailikesi said:

I have a story to share, but not a happy one.

 

Not too Long ago I started playing 狼人杀 game and get to know a number of new friends. We played almost Everyday since it is CB for us and also wfh. People who are familiar with the game or 娱乐百分百 will know the popular CP in Taiwan, so within the game he & I formed a pair of CP. from Using the game app to message to he ask my friend for my number to call me to play game. By the way He is a Malaysian, and since then we started what’s app each other and followed each other Instagram. I must say he is not handsome or what, at least not the type of guy I will love. But from all the interactions and having him flirting with me as we are a CP, slowly and unknowingly I fell in love with him. Of cos as a closet I keep it to myself, not knowing if he is one of us or straight. Of cos, I look through all the photos of his Instagram and no sign if he is attached so I assumed he is single. 
 

He will always send me good morning message, or rather we will send each other, talk a lot Everyday. I really love his voice and even out of the game group chat in our pm he will also continue to “play” with me or flirt/sweet talk me. 
 

somehow until one day when I slowly quit playing the game, he will tends to “forget” about me in WhatsApp. Forgot to reply, so somehow I felt ya he don’t like me, I better stay a distance from him and don’t fall in deep. but he will be so alert that 2days I did not talk to him and come and message me and say he forgot to reply me, ask me why he sense that I felt sad. U know the kind of sensitive feeling that not many will be able to sense. So I tell myself maybe he really miss out my message. So he continue to flirt with me. Days goes own and in our game group chat when he is talking to another friend unknowingly/intentionally he let me found out he is Attached (even I wasn’t 100% sure)!
 

I was greatly disappointed and sad and told myself that okay I shall stop all the flirting I ignore him in the group chat and be as cold to him as possible (my principle is to reply all message if it is directed to me). He sensed it, and put in the group chat that I ignore him and tagged me. I replied all the messages was not talking to me nothing to reply him. For a few days he will try talking and flirt with me ask him how am I etc. Then last Sunday I was contemplating to ask him he is attached and telling him I like him, I send him good morning message after several days not sending. He replied goodmorning but I have no courage to ask and confess.

 

the next day in the group chat somehow he ask me Guess if he is attached, cAnt remember what topic leads to that. I replied he is attached. He ignored and dint answer. So I reply that privately and ask him why he did not answer if I Guess correctly. Then he admitted yes he have been attached for 3years (I am so heart broken). I replied then me how? With 😭😭. He asked, if I really have feelings for him. I replied yes. 
 

this happened on Monday. I am still very sad now, past few days I did not sleep well, up till now. In the group chat I still need to pretend and talk like normal (flirt with each other) so others won’t suspect. Firstly I dint expect I will fall for someone when I never ever seen him, and I can fall for him so deep. 
 

ps for my Long bored and sad story. Maybe is a place for me to rant.

 

Sorry ... throughout the entire post, I don't think I saw any part in which you mentioned that he said anything about him liking you at all, other then the portion which you said he "flirted" with you in a "GROUP CHAT"??? I feel as if this had been a one-sided thing completely, and you have completely mis-read his "flirting" remarks. The fact that he did not let you know that he has been attached for 3 years, just goes to show that he didn't even think too much of you as a potential partner at all to let you know that. And I think he only let you in on that fact because he sensed that you were "into" him. And that's when he needs to let you know ahead of time before things gets any more weird.  In short, I think you not just 一厢情愿, but you also completely 表错情 and it can really freak people out. 

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2 hours ago, GachiMuchi said:

 

The fact that he is possibly Bi, the more you should be far away from him. He will very likely marry his girlfriend and you, will have another big pain coming the day he announced he is getting married.  So, please, get out of this person's clutch and cut ALL ties with him. block him and leave the chat group.

 

Yes. in the mean time, give yourself time to heal. And seriously, ask yourself, why are you in such position? What is the root cause of you falling for such a person. It's certainly not the looks, so what was it? Were you hopeful and or a little desperate perhaps because you were single for too long? What was the thing that was attractive about him, his care and concern? his sweet words?  Knowing the cause and how you ended will help you be more careful the next time you meet someone who is so. Learn from your own mistake and learn to be sensitive to your six sense in telling you that these are danger signs and you might end up in a game and get yourself trapped. A lot of times, people became 小三 (3rd party) because they choose to be or sometimes they think they can change the person. but in the end, they realised that that was their fat hope. They have no one to blame but themselves for their choices.

 

You need to own up and take responsible for your own mistakes and learn from your mistakes and then regroup your feelings and collect your hurt emotions and move on with life because, there will be someone out there. Get out more and meet real people. Message your old friends and go drink coffee or makan with them. Don't stay home and wallow in your own sorrow. Go exercise and get yourself healthy and you will get better really soon.

 

 

Yes I totally understand your point. You are probably very right. 

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1 hour ago, Guest Guest said:

 

Sorry ... throughout the entire post, I don't think I saw any part in which you mentioned that he said anything about him liking you at all, other then the portion which you said he "flirted" with you in a "GROUP CHAT"??? I feel as if this had been a one-sided thing completely, and you have completely mis-read his "flirting" remarks. The fact that he did not let you know that he has been attached for 3 years, just goes to show that he didn't even think too much of you as a potential partner at all to let you know that. And I think he only let you in on that fact because he sensed that you were "into" him. And that's when he needs to let you know ahead of time before things gets any more weird.  In short, I think you not just 一厢情愿, but you also completely 表错情 and it can really freak people out. 

Yes, of cos he did not mention he like me directly. But sure he did mention things to others that he is mine or I belong to him. Obviously is joking la from the facts. And it is not only in the group chat he flirted la, it is in the pm also. Surely for now it is 一厢情愿. 

 

freak him out wise I don’t think so, he is not the one avoiding me, I am the one avoiding him. 

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14 hours ago, sg89ailikesi said:

I have a story to share, but not a happy one.

 

Not too Long ago I started playing 狼人杀 game and get to know a number of new friends. We played almost Everyday since it is CB for us and also wfh. People who are familiar with the game or 娱乐百分百 will know the popular CP in Taiwan, so within the game he & I formed a pair of CP. from Using the game app to message to he ask my friend for my number to call me to play game. By the way He is a Malaysian, and since then we started what’s app each other and followed each other Instagram. I must say he is not handsome or what, at least not the type of guy I will love. But from all the interactions and having him flirting with me as we are a CP, slowly and unknowingly I fell in love with him. Of cos as a closet I keep it to myself, not knowing if he is one of us or straight. Of cos, I look through all the photos of his Instagram and no sign if he is attached so I assumed he is single. 
 

He will always send me good morning message, or rather we will send each other, talk a lot Everyday. I really love his voice and even out of the game group chat in our pm he will also continue to “play” with me or flirt/sweet talk me. 
 

somehow until one day when I slowly quit playing the game, he will tends to “forget” about me in WhatsApp. Forgot to reply, so somehow I felt ya he don’t like me, I better stay a distance from him and don’t fall in deep. but he will be so alert that 2days I did not talk to him and come and message me and say he forgot to reply me, ask me why he sense that I felt sad. U know the kind of sensitive feeling that not many will be able to sense. So I tell myself maybe he really miss out my message. So he continue to flirt with me. Days goes own and in our game group chat when he is talking to another friend unknowingly/intentionally he let me found out he is Attached (even I wasn’t 100% sure)!
 

I was greatly disappointed and sad and told myself that okay I shall stop all the flirting I ignore him in the group chat and be as cold to him as possible (my principle is to reply all message if it is directed to me). He sensed it, and put in the group chat that I ignore him and tagged me. I replied all the messages was not talking to me nothing to reply him. For a few days he will try talking and flirt with me ask him how am I etc. Then last Sunday I was contemplating to ask him he is attached and telling him I like him, I send him good morning message after several days not sending. He replied goodmorning but I have no courage to ask and confess.

 

the next day in the group chat somehow he ask me Guess if he is attached, cAnt remember what topic leads to that. I replied he is attached. He ignored and dint answer. So I reply that privately and ask him why he did not answer if I Guess correctly. Then he admitted yes he have been attached for 3years (I am so heart broken). I replied then me how? With 😭😭. He asked, if I really have feelings for him. I replied yes. 
 

this happened on Monday. I am still very sad now, past few days I did not sleep well, up till now. In the group chat I still need to pretend and talk like normal (flirt with each other) so others won’t suspect. Firstly I dint expect I will fall for someone when I never ever seen him, and I can fall for him so deep. 
 

ps for my Long bored and sad story. Maybe is a place for me to rant.

 

I am really sad to read something like this.

 

How can you take a play group on some forum as real life? And even fall in love with someone you never met in real? This is alike falling in love with a Ronaldo poster hanging at one side of my bed room.

 

Please start stepping out of your shell and start to live and to date real people which you meet in real scenarios and meet them face to face.

 

You seem to be 30 years old and chasing someone else who is like an avatar. You can love your teddy bear as a kid but at some point of time you should fall in love with real persons and not with avatars.

 

I guess you have over interpreted his "flirts", maybe which weren't even meant as flirting at all but just some chat. I assume the lack of your social interaction with other people led you to think someone has been flirting with you.

 

I guess you must be a very lonely person. What prevents you from connecting to real people in real life? What are you scared of?

 

Without my loves, disappointments, failures, successes and human interaction( nice, ugly, nasty, pleasant) I would have never experienced the ups and downs of life.

And even if there are sad moments, you still learn for the future.

 

Please TS stop chasing dreams and step out of that isolated shell which you have built around you.

 

Please forgive me if I had banged you head with a thick steel pan, but I think it was appropriate in your situation. You can't go on like this.

 

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16 hours ago, sg89ailikesi said:


this happened on Monday. I am still very sad now, past few days I did not sleep well, up till now. In the group chat I still need to pretend and talk like normal (flirt with each other) so others won’t suspect. Firstly I dint expect I will fall for someone when I never ever seen him, and I can fall for him so deep. 

 

 

Not here to curate your experience with the guy.  Just like you, there are many unknowns, especially when the 'friendship' has only started.  It has only been for few months.  All you and us (the readers) can do is only to make guesses and hopefully, it is a good and informed one.

 

All that I want to share with you is about honouring your feelings.  There is nothing wrong or to be ashamed off for falling for someone.  There should not even be a feeling of guilt.  The fact that you are able to feel love is healthy.  That, in itself, speaks volume about your soul.

 

For now, handle your expectations.  Accept this guy as another being that is giving you good life experiences.  When we can accept every experiences we are facing with positivity (even if they disappoint, fail or hurt us), good things will come even more. 

 

I believe if you can forgive yourself for assuming things and that you forgive him too for making you to think he was giving false hope, you will get over your sadness.  There will be paradigm shift.  

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5 hours ago, singalion said:

 

I am really sad to read something like this.

 

How can you take a play group on some forum as real life? And even fall in love with someone you never met in real? This is alike falling in love with a Ronaldo poster hanging at one side of my bed room.

 

Please start stepping out of your shell and start to live and to date real people which you meet in real scenarios and meet them face to face.

 

You seem to be 30 years old and chasing someone else who is like an avatar. You can love your teddy bear as a kid but at some point of time you should fall in love with real persons and not with avatars.

 

I guess you have over interpreted his "flirts", maybe which weren't even meant as flirting at all but just some chat. I assume the lack of your social interaction with other people led you to think someone has been flirting with you.

 

I guess you must be a very lonely person. What prevents you from connecting to real people in real life? What are you scared of?

 

Without my loves, disappointments, failures, successes and human interaction( nice, ugly, nasty, pleasant) I would have never experienced the ups and downs of life.

And even if there are sad moments, you still learn for the future.

 

Please TS stop chasing dreams and step out of that isolated shell which you have built around you.

 

Please forgive me if I had banged you head with a thick steel pan, but I think it was appropriate in your situation. You can't go on like this.

 

Hahaha, well this is a forum u have every right to say anything. What preventing me to connect with real people? My answer will probably be covid. It was just nice a platform to spend time during these period. 
 

of cos, you wonder why will I fall for someone whom I never ever met in real life?  Honestly I never thought of it happening before. Well maybe u will think I am too lonely or what, maybe that’s true somehow, but I know it isn’t. It is just certain chemistry . And I am not chasing dreams, that’s why I know I have to put a stop. 

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3 hours ago, Guest Prayers said:

 

 

All that I want to share with you is about honouring your feelings.  There is nothing wrong or to be ashamed off for falling for someone.  There should not even be a feeling of guilt.  The fact that you are able to feel love is healthy.  That, in itself, speaks volume about your soul.

 

For now, handle your expectations.  Accept this guy as another being that is giving you good life experiences.  When we can accept every experiences we are facing with positivity (even if they disappoint, fail or hurt us), good things will come even more. 

 

I believe if you can forgive yourself for assuming things and that you forgive him too for making you to think he was giving false hope, you will get over your sadness.  There will be paradigm shift.  

Yes that is for sure. Thank you 😊 

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21 hours ago, sg89ailikesi said:

I have a story to share, but not a happy one.

 

Not too Long ago I started playing 狼人杀 game and get to know a number of new friends. We played almost Everyday since it is CB for us and also wfh. People who are familiar with the game or 娱乐百分百 will know the popular CP in Taiwan, so within the game he & I formed a pair of CP. from Using the game app to message to he ask my friend for my number to call me to play game. By the way He is a Malaysian, and since then we started what’s app each other and followed each other Instagram. I must say he is not handsome or what, at least not the type of guy I will love. But from all the interactions and having him flirting with me as we are a CP, slowly and unknowingly I fell in love with him. Of cos as a closet I keep it to myself, not knowing if he is one of us or straight. Of cos, I look through all the photos of his Instagram and no sign if he is attached so I assumed he is single. 
 

He will always send me good morning message, or rather we will send each other, talk a lot Everyday. I really love his voice and even out of the game group chat in our pm he will also continue to “play” with me or flirt/sweet talk me. 
 

somehow until one day when I slowly quit playing the game, he will tends to “forget” about me in WhatsApp. Forgot to reply, so somehow I felt ya he don’t like me, I better stay a distance from him and don’t fall in deep. but he will be so alert that 2days I did not talk to him and come and message me and say he forgot to reply me, ask me why he sense that I felt sad. U know the kind of sensitive feeling that not many will be able to sense. So I tell myself maybe he really miss out my message. So he continue to flirt with me. Days goes own and in our game group chat when he is talking to another friend unknowingly/intentionally he let me found out he is Attached (even I wasn’t 100% sure)!
 

I was greatly disappointed and sad and told myself that okay I shall stop all the flirting I ignore him in the group chat and be as cold to him as possible (my principle is to reply all message if it is directed to me). He sensed it, and put in the group chat that I ignore him and tagged me. I replied all the messages was not talking to me nothing to reply him. For a few days he will try talking and flirt with me ask him how am I etc. Then last Sunday I was contemplating to ask him he is attached and telling him I like him, I send him good morning message after several days not sending. He replied goodmorning but I have no courage to ask and confess.

 

the next day in the group chat somehow he ask me Guess if he is attached, cAnt remember what topic leads to that. I replied he is attached. He ignored and dint answer. So I reply that privately and ask him why he did not answer if I Guess correctly. Then he admitted yes he have been attached for 3years (I am so heart broken). I replied then me how? With 😭😭. He asked, if I really have feelings for him. I replied yes. 
 

this happened on Monday. I am still very sad now, past few days I did not sleep well, up till now. In the group chat I still need to pretend and talk like normal (flirt with each other) so others won’t suspect. Firstly I dint expect I will fall for someone when I never ever seen him, and I can fall for him so deep. 
 

ps for my Long bored and sad story. Maybe is a place for me to rant.

Happened to stumble upon your post in the middle of the night, so kinda tot of sharing some advices with you. 
 

There’s nothing wrong with falling in love with someone, regardless whether he or she, is single or attached. Love is love, there isn’t a right or wrong to matters of the heart, what’s more it’s something beyond our control. 
 

It’s indeed a blessing, to have someone whom your heart could be given to. Even if the eventual outcome might not be something you had wished or yearned for, at least you possessed fond memories which you could rekindle and reminisce. 
 

Not many people had such opportunity or luck to meet someone physically or virtually, whom gets connected with you emotionally.

 

Think about the sweet moments you guys used to enjoy together, fold them up into little stars and seal it in your heart and memory. Whenever you feel depressed or dejected, look into your heart and search for the little stars shining dimly at a corner. One day, these stars will become part of your history which you could safekeep them away for good. 
 

I always believe, when a door shuts in front of you, another will be opened at the other end.

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1 hour ago, CKBE-Fanz88 said:

Happened to stumble upon your post in the middle of the night, so kinda tot of sharing some advices with you. 
 

There’s nothing wrong with falling in love with someone, regardless whether he or she, is single or attached. Love is love, there isn’t a right or wrong to matters of the heart, what’s more it’s something beyond our control. 
 

It’s indeed a blessing, to have someone whom your heart could be given to. Even if the eventual outcome might not be something you had wished or yearned for, at least you possessed fond memories which you could rekindle and reminisce. 
 

Not many people had such opportunity or luck to meet someone physically or virtually, whom gets connected with you emotionally.

 

Think about the sweet moments you guys used to enjoy together, fold them up into little stars and seal it in your heart and memory. Whenever you feel depressed or dejected, look into your heart and search for the little stars shining dimly at a corner. One day, these stars will become part of your history which you could safekeep them away for good. 
 

I always believe, when a door shuts in front of you, another will be opened at the other end.

Thank you for sharing(: as it is something real recent, i choose to keep these memory and moment deep in to prevent falling deeper. As you also can see some people will think why will I even fall for someone virtually and people thinking no right or wrong. What I know is when I do something I don’t regret regardless the outcome, because i had think through before a decision is made. Of cos falling in love was not a decision but still no regret. 

 

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4 hours ago, sg89ailikesi said:

Hahaha, well this is a forum u have every right to say anything. What preventing me to connect with real people? My answer will probably be covid. It was just nice a platform to spend time during these period. 
 

of cos, you wonder why will I fall for someone whom I never ever met in real life?  Honestly I never thought of it happening before. Well maybe u will think I am too lonely or what, maybe that’s true somehow, but I know it isn’t. It is just certain chemistry . And I am not chasing dreams, that’s why I know I have to put a stop. 

Now already phase 2 of covid for some time already. Its lawfully to go meet real people as long as not more than 5. Time to go out and dont procrastinate. 

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2 hours ago, sg89ailikesi said:

Thank you for sharing(: as it is something real recent, i choose to keep these memory and moment deep in to prevent falling deeper. As you also can see some people will think why will I even fall for someone virtually and people thinking no right or wrong. What I know is when I do something I don’t regret regardless the outcome, because i had think through before a decision is made. Of cos falling in love was not a decision but still no regret. 

 

 

It may be preferable to have failed relationships than no relationships at all.   As long as the failures remain emotional and not physical.  A physical could be an old couple who falls in love with some big mouth televangelist and sends him a lot of money,  only to pass away and find out that the televangelist is nothing but a con man, LOL!

 

I hope that this thread returns to its original case by @Jernaldo, which I find more meaningful.

 

 

On 9/28/2020 at 4:48 AM, Jernaldo said:

Greatly appreciate this piece of advice! Will try to ask him if I can accompany him to his treatment one day, im also curious what are the steps taken during the treatment.

 

Yeah, I think for now Ill just be patient and give him as much time as he need. He knows anyway that Ill be there for him anytime if he needs me 😂

 

He lives alone, so I guess the tendency and chances to overthink and get into a depress state is frequent too... if lockdown were to commence again, I really hope that he will hang on or if I can be there for him too...

 

It would be great if you accompany him to his treatment, especially with him living alone.  When we have medical problems, it is always good to have a companion who can be the "attorney" four our case in front of the medical establishment.  I was such an attorney for my late bf and I was with him in hundreds of visits and lengthy stays at the hospital. And I had a formal "power of attorney" to decide his treatment if he was incapacitated. 

 

It seems nearly certain that K will appreciate your interest for him and will look forward to your company during his treatments.  It can also strongly increase the chances that he falls in love with his voluntary caretaker.  This would seem rather artificial, but there can be complete honesty and total reciprocity in the benefits to each party. 

.

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