teach me how do gape

[luv2bnude]

Hi, 

 

it seems like I am not able to gape at all, need experts' guidance pls... 

I have had done my homework, most website will say to be aroused and deep breathing to relax the anal sphincter.  Tried but not proven for me.   

 

in porn, i can see the actor/actress' anus with a small opening, after that, they can gape without much effort.

 

thanks so much for all replies.

[upshot]

Not everyone can gape their involuntary ass sphincter. That is one opening where the muscle ring is not something you can mentally WILL it to open wide or stay open wide. It's a reaction that is triggered by certain things you do to that opening that cause the muscle to 'relax'. And to gape big enough for you to see.

 

How big a cock or item have you uses to penetrate and fuck your ass? To get it to gape more depend on how big a tool you use on it. Do not expect to see a pencil diameter item you fuck your ass with will upon removing the pencil will leave a pencil width gape. It does not work like that. And note, I know of folks who do not gape or gape little like me.

 

You have to be putting something way bigger to see even a decent gape. Most of the time when you have not fuck.. say a normal size dick, trying to enter that hole is not easy especially without lube. But that hole is shut down enough that shit do not drop out.  When you have sex with a dick for like 5 mins, your asshole is actually less tightly close, when you put your finger in, it actually can go in easier as it has gotten use to an object GOING IN so it is adjusting the surrounding muscle to stay loosen involuntary to accustom to that object and size entering you in that in/out motion but even this take doing anal sex for a while and not some virgin or nervous ass guy still new to the sensation of ass fucking.

 

So how big you want to see that gape? Big means you need to take something bigger and get fucked for long. Some muscle relaxant that you take a hit can help but ultimately you need to get something big to fuck you for a long while before you can redraw the object and see that gape happen. And also, some people get that happen more often than others and also how you position your body to get it. If you notice when they show you a gape in porn videos, they are in a certain fuck position. This is because a certain position AFFECT how your muscle relax, contract or expand. Your ass muscle ring tend to close up as that entire group muscle in order for you to sit, spread your legs, doggie style...etc.

 

You can not usually see your own gape for example (without a mirror) Example: you lie on your back on a chair with back rest lowered and having fun with your dildo for a long while, and you unplug your dildo and you watch as your hole will contract back up or close down far enough you do not see a gape but you can feel your finger go in very easily like only a light lip is closed around your finger with no pressure. That is a gape too but it is so cushioned with soft tissue. Your muscle is really open wider than normal.

 

But to see a cave of a gape, you need to do more and take bigger.  Hope that help you understand from someone like me who is into large then cock toys and also do not gape as much even when I go big and fuck my ass for hours. heheh

 

Also you heard few people talk about gape as there are those who think it is disgusting and means you are a loose hole or a pure slut to damage your hole like that. IT IS ALL BULL SHIT. EVERYONE do enough sex will have loose holes... NOT PERMANENT but it is something with enough anal sex, your hole can react very differently than it normally do. Its adapting over time. And this adapting causes some people to gape easy and for some to loosen up and tighten over time or some to clam down on anything that is put inside their ass. Clamping down is something that is more mental and there are good chance to change that. But a gape is an involuntary action. For that is why you see certain porn star do it and others never show them do so. Very likely they can not gape.. or at least not in as gloriously big like those who can. Gaping is very much like an attraction like a guy with a big dick.

Edited November 23, 2020 by upshot

[luv2bnude]

Hi Bro Upshot,

 

thanks for the detail explanation.  😁  you are very helpful and knowledgeable.👍

i think to gape is beautiful.

 

cheers

[upshot]

7 hours ago, luv2bnude said:

Hi Bro Upshot,

 

thanks for the detail explanation.  😁  you are very helpful and knowledgeable.👍

i think to gape is beautiful.

 

cheers

 

No prob. To each, their own perception. I am sure some TOPs big enough to make that opening on your btm's manpussy, it must make them feel like a God. And you a proper slut of the year heheh.

 

I think it looks so nasty and wicked slutty that fantasy in your head of seeing how your ass is agape like it got raped by a street lamp post hahahah.

 

Note that if you like to clamp down hard around a cock fucking your manpussy to offer more tightness sensation, you will NOT gape. Bearing down like that will prevent your ass muscle from relaxing but contract. I get it, BTMs also like to clamp down to really feel a good size cock's movement fucking them. They have to learn to 'open up' heh Its a mental thing. But if you want to get that gape, you have to learn a few new tricks.

 

Doing much Kegel muscle exercise makes it harder to gape. Kegel exercise help you to do power fucking more than the so call help your asshole from becoming loose. Power fucking as in clamp down hard on a cock for a long period of time. That kind of muscle prowess takes workout. Clamping down hard on a cock fucking you is like running a 100m sprint. heheh. My hats off to people who can hold it for numerous minutes heheh.. it is hard work.

 

Let's get this 'lose' hole thingy out of the way. YOU feel loose or your TOP feel lose because you are no longer a brand-new  virgin but someone who has mentally and physically condition yourself to accept things GOING INSIDE YOU. Without the worry factor or newbie jitters, you tend to be more relaxed when someone wants to use your backside for sex. Thus you feel 'loose'.

 

CAN YOU EVER GET TOO LOSE? YES.. if you like big toys a lot, enjoy fisting, depend on how often you love doing it, how big you tend to go and your physical form as each of us are NOT built the same. Your asshole will not look like a tightly shut spot. It might look a bit like a closed slit. Shit will still not fall out. So not to worry too much unless you are into giant toy insertions like a 1.5L coke pet bottle or larger. (no I am not into that extremes unless I like wearing diapers) It will still work as normal to a major extent for anything like a fist still. You can't have every thing and things stay the same. So it balances on what to compromise for fun. heh. Life's like that.

 

Maybe that is why I do not gape big heh  I like to play with my anal beads too and enjoy loading up and using muscle around my rectum to crunch on the beads inside me and feel their movement about or as I use muscle to suck them up deeper. So this kegel action I guess cause stronger and more taut muscle so gaping is a little harder. For those into anal beads especially large one will understand.

 

If you like clinching your ass muscle or you do it as you change position from doggie style to lying down on your back as you move, that gape goes away given how your movement requires use of your various muscle groups.

 

That is why when they do that in porn, it is in the usual 'gaping' inducing posture (normally doggie). Removing the cock to reveal that gape while the BTM stays still. Its not shot like that angle for better video heheh. It will close up naturally when you move from one position to another.

 

I like to add that you can mentally help make it happen by not just penis or toy size and sexual position, you mentally imagine your hole feeling relax and imagine it opening WIDER to swallow a cock. It's a mental stimuli thingy. Not sure how to explain it. This work for people already use to and enjoy anal sex and cocks/toys like 4cm diameter thick.

 

As I said you can not mentally control your anal sphincter ring (apart from contracting it tight) but with enough mental coaxing, horny stimulation you play in your head, help relax those muscle naturally or at least help up from tightening your anus. (BTW, this also help progressively take bigger cocks or toys if you so want to get 'ambitious' 😜) At the same time, remember not to clamp down on cock/toy. Feel loose. Keep imagining you are trying to open up more as you push back on his thrusting cock or toy inside you. Feel the thrusting motion and shaft but do not clamp down on it especially prior to removal to reveal if you are gaping. Imagine trying to open up even bigger.

 

For me when I get into that zone, is when my bottom part of my ass end feels completely loose-like sensation. And when that happens, I can observe the gape (with my webcam) or even in a state where, my asshole's is nicely relax, I can insert my finger in it and there is no pressure on it or even have my lover do a little 'teaspoon stirring action' with his finger 😛  But once I contract my anus, it goes away..you can not get it to gape without working that manpussy again with your cock or toy. It needs to be re-conditioned again. What I do know is, as you do this more and more overtime, it gets easier.

 

I know I sound weird right.. one moment intelligent topic and then suddenly something pops out of me sounding 'out and out' anal slut stuff hahahah... Keeping it real guys. Only human. In sex, safety, common sense and keeping things in perspective and fun is important. I like to try to separate truths from make-believe rumours, old wives tales that can harm, perpetuate BS or worth mislead newbies. Be it taboo-like, too 'malu' or off-colour to talk about or not 'glamorous'. Fuck it. I don't care, speaking from experiences.

 

For some guys, I KNOW YOU are going to do it no matter what, so might as well learn to do it proper or at least know what are the right and wrong of it from people who do it. Cheers. If it does not hurt others, unlawful, condoning with your lover(s) and you have a healthy approach to it and within your own private space. Have go slow and have fun.

Edited November 24, 2020 by upshot

[doncoin]

I don't understand gays who judge other gays- especially those who are tops and think that slutty bottoms like they are lesser than. You want to gape, you want to have a WAP, that's your prerogative. Sex is meant to be pleasurable and enjoyable. If you are getting laid more often as a bottom, kudos to you. Those who judge you and think that you are a "loose" bottom, well too bad for them. At least you are having sex while they wank off alone to porn. 

 

I like slutty bottom guys. At least I know we will both have a good time, and no drama with all the judgmental shit. I like making them moan and groan and gag, and gape. I admit it turns me on. 🤪

Edited November 24, 2020 by doncoin

[savagegarden]

On 11/23/2020 at 7:50 PM, upshot said:

Not everyone can gape their involuntary ass sphincter. That is one opening where the muscle ring is not something you can mentally WILL it to open wide or stay open wide. It's a reaction that is triggered by certain things you do to that opening that cause the muscle to 'relax'. And to gape big enough for you to see.

 

How big a cock or item have you uses to penetrate and fuck your ass? To get it to gape more depend on how big a tool you use on it. Do not expect to see a pencil diameter item you fuck your ass with will upon removing the pencil will leave a pencil width gape. It does not work like that. And note, I know of folks who do not gape or gape little like me.

 

You have to be putting something way bigger to see even a decent gape. Most of the time when you have not fuck.. say a normal size dick, trying to enter that hole is not easy especially without lube. But that hole is shut down enough that shit do not drop out.  When you have sex with a dick for like 5 mins, your asshole is actually less tightly close, when you put your finger in, it actually can go in easier as it has gotten use to an object GOING IN so it is adjusting the surrounding muscle to stay loosen involuntary to accustom to that object and size entering you in that in/out motion but even this take doing anal sex for a while and not some virgin or nervous ass guy still new to the sensation of ass fucking.

 

So how big you want to see that gape? Big means you need to take something bigger and get fucked for long. Some muscle relaxant that you take a hit can help but ultimately you need to get something big to fuck you for a long while before you can redraw the object and see that gape happen. And also, some people get that happen more often than others and also how you position your body to get it. If you notice when they show you a gape in porn videos, they are in a certain fuck position. This is because a certain position AFFECT how your muscle relax, contract or expand. Your ass muscle ring tend to close up as that entire group muscle in order for you to sit, spread your legs, doggie style...etc.

 

You can not usually see your own gape for example (without a mirror) Example: you lie on your back on a chair with back rest lowered and having fun with your dildo for a long while, and you unplug your dildo and you watch as your hole will contract back up or close down far enough you do not see a gape but you can feel your finger go in very easily like only a light lip is closed around your finger with no pressure. That is a gape too but it is so cushioned with soft tissue. Your muscle is really open wider than normal.

 

But to see a cave of a gape, you need to do more and take bigger.  Hope that help you understand from someone like me who is into large then cock toys and also do not gape as much even when I go big and fuck my ass for hours. heheh

 

Also you heard few people talk about gape as there are those who think it is disgusting and means you are a loose hole or a pure slut to damage your hole like that. IT IS ALL BULL SHIT. EVERYONE do enough sex will have loose holes... NOT PERMANENT but it is something with enough anal sex, your hole can react very differently than it normally do. Its adapting over time. And this adapting causes some people to gape easy and for some to loosen up and tighten over time or some to clam down on anything that is put inside their ass. Clamping down is something that is more mental and there are good chance to change that. But a gape is an involuntary action. For that is why you see certain porn star do it and others never show them do so. Very likely they can not gape.. or at least not in as gloriously big like those who can. Gaping is very much like an attraction like a guy with a big dick.

 

Agree that it's because of prep penetration. Remember those porn films are shot over several takes and are edited so you will not see how the bottom was being penetrated big time before those 'gaping' scenes. 

[Hole4use]

On 11/24/2020 at 1:35 PM, luv2bnude said:

Hi Bro Upshot,

 

thanks for the detail explanation.  😁  you are very helpful and knowledgeable.👍

i think to gape is beautiful.

 

cheers

 

Yes, I feel that gaping is beautiful too... 

[upshot]

8 hours ago, savagegarden said:

 

Agree that it's because of prep penetration. Remember those porn films are shot over several takes and are edited so you will not see how the bottom was being penetrated big time before those 'gaping' scenes. 

Yup... quite a bit of anal play to 'condition' it. You also have to be pretty clean inside before you do that. You do not want something deep inside to be wiggling its way out heh...To prevent this, you not just need to clear out your rectum cavity (about  6-8inch deep) but need to flush pass your sigmoid curve and lower vertical colon. This ensures after an hour of enema/anal play you are still clear and unlikely to have 'brown accidents' Remember, natural motion of your colon pushing down shit happens constantly. It is like a conveyor belt. So best to clear shit deeper inside in advance so you buy yourself longer anal play time.

 

Another good reason for doing this deep enema is if like me, you enjoy deep dildo (17" long) fun. If you enjoy long duration anal sex like say, service as many guys in a spa, for example. Then deep enema helps a lot. It does take time. Anything from 30 mins to 1.5 hours to get water flowing out clear. I like that level of clean personally. I do this for the occasional online exhibitionist toy fun that can last 12 hours. So a good clean goes a long way. No pun intended. heh

 

You need to 'bore' your ass wide and deep with toy or cock thick enough to push against the wall of the rectum and sprinters muscle ring. That mean working your way from smaller objects to wider ones And you have to avoid flexing your muscle down there. You have to physically and mentally enable a pushing out to open wide motion and not clam down to the toy as you fuck it. It's hard to explain this bit but if you do enough big anal especially toys you know what I mean.

 

For me the best way to explain this is being in doggie position, I have a dildo with suction cup that I stick to a wall. In doggie style, I self hump that dildo to fuck me. As I bear down on it by pushing my rear against the dildo to get it inside. I have this mental image of telling my ass to open up wide and take it all in as I feel it stretch me out and barrel inside me. It's so shiok if you are into this. And you can feel it all. Something only a larger cock or toy can usually make happen. It's rather tactile. A guy can do it if he is big enough and your hole is still not overly experience with anal yet but as you get on with anal over the years, you find you need more upsize to feel the same. In a way you are enlarged a little but that same sensation now needs a boost to differential it normal. It's like cigarette smoking.. your first stick makes you giddy but the 3rd or 4th stick later in the day does so little to buzz you. For newbies who do not know what I mean.

 

To the point, a good size dildo with ample anal lube, you start to fuck that dildo in a rhythmic smooth motion and almost little friction but just enough sensation of feeling the bumps and texture of the cock or dildo moving in and out of you. That's the time you start to enjoy the fucking motion and before long, that sphincter muscle will relax. Your ass will start to get use to something being there and loosen up. As you pull yourself forward while still in doggie position to have the dildo pull out of your ass, you will have that gape. AGAIN, DO NOT FLEX on that dildo or cock all this time prior to pulling out.

 

Might not be large (depending on size of cock/toy) but you likely will see a gape or feels like a gape. You might still see a rosebud. But try putting a finger in and you feel it is like a soft 'curtain' but your finger goes in without any resistance or pressure. That's a gape still. You got your first start~!

 

To go bigger, well, of course you need to get a bigger toy. Working your way to bigger that is. Do not JUMP str8 to a big toy or rish damaging your ass hole.

 

Some porn stars do this so damn nice heheh A few I am familiar with them (females and males) and one thing I know for sure about them is, they are all into big toys or dicks in their videos they make. Doing it alone or with people, just know to take your time. I would say this is NOT for someone who have no idea what they are really doing anally still. Newbies. So you got to learn to understand your own ass and work your way to this over time. We all do not react in the same way or our ass are the same size and construction. So never take what someone say literally. There are sure to be something not similar. So go slow.

 

It can be months or a year before you can do big toy left alone gapes. There is some mental play that comes with this. A lot of time people endure painful sex is because they could not get pass the MENTAL equation. And also fearmongering from idiots who like to scare people about anal sex. Misguided advices. We heard them all in our circle.

 

Also, ask yourself. Are you someone who enjoy the stimulation of anal fucking. Have you tried dicks and toys beyond average size? It is only when you stretch it out at least thicker than normal size or shit size that you start to get into that next level erotic sensation. For some it seems more like "pain" they feel. Working up to bigger girth does require some conditioning and pain is a part of it. Barely. If done right.

 

For some, this stops them from going further but for adventurous that pain only a start to overcome to get to more sensually shiok. Again, this is something not for everyone. We who do it, know what we are in for and what the trade-off will be. Takes some walking through to get to this level of play. For guys who do, it is at another level of sexual sensory and experiences.

 

[savagegarden]

3 hours ago, upshot said:

Yup... quite a bit of anal play to 'condition' it. You also have to be pretty clean inside before you do that. You do not want something deep inside to be wiggling its way out heh...To prevent this, you not just need to clear out your rectum cavity (about  6-8inch deep) but need to flush pass your sigmoid curve and lower vertical colon. This ensures after an hour of enema/anal play you are still clear and unlikely to have 'brown accidents' Remember, natural motion of your colon pushing down shit happens constantly. It is like a conveyor belt. So best to clear shit deeper inside in advance so you buy yourself longer anal play time.

 

Another good reason for doing this deep enema is if like me, you enjoy deep dildo (17" long) fun. If you enjoy long duration anal sex like say, service as many guys in a spa, for example. Then deep enema helps a lot. It does take time. Anything from 30 mins to 1.5 hours to get water flowing out clear. I like that level of clean personally. I do this for the occasional online exhibitionist toy fun that can last 12 hours. So a good clean goes a long way. No pun intended. heh

 

You need to 'bore' your ass wide and deep with toy or cock thick enough to push against the wall of the rectum and sprinters muscle ring. That mean working your way from smaller objects to wider ones And you have to avoid flexing your muscle down there. You have to physically and mentally enable a pushing out to open wide motion and not clam down to the toy as you fuck it. It's hard to explain this bit but if you do enough big anal especially toys you know what I mean.

 

For me the best way to explain this is being in doggie position, I have a dildo with suction cup that I stick to a wall. In doggie style, I self hump that dildo to fuck me. As I bear down on it by pushing my rear against the dildo to get it inside. I have this mental image of telling my ass to open up wide and take it all in as I feel it stretch me out and barrel inside me. It's so shiok if you are into this. And you can feel it all. Something only a larger cock or toy can usually make happen. It's rather tactile. A guy can do it if he is big enough and your hole is still not overly experience with anal yet but as you get on with anal over the years, you find you need more upsize to feel the same. In a way you are enlarged a little but that same sensation now needs a boost to differential it normal. It's like cigarette smoking.. your first stick makes you giddy but the 3rd or 4th stick later in the day does so little to buzz you. For newbies who do not know what I mean.

 

To the point, a good size dildo with ample anal lube, you start to fuck that dildo in a rhythmic smooth motion and almost little friction but just enough sensation of feeling the bumps and texture of the cock or dildo moving in and out of you. That's the time you start to enjoy the fucking motion and before long, that sphincter muscle will relax. Your ass will start to get use to something being there and loosen up. As you pull yourself forward while still in doggie position to have the dildo pull out of your ass, you will have that gape. AGAIN, DO NOT FLEX on that dildo or cock all this time prior to pulling out.

 

Might not be large (depending on size of cock/toy) but you likely will see a gape or feels like a gape. You might still see a rosebud. But try putting a finger in and you feel it is like a soft 'curtain' but your finger goes in without any resistance or pressure. That's a gape still. You got your first start~!

 

To go bigger, well, of course you need to get a bigger toy. Working your way to bigger that is. Do not JUMP str8 to a big toy or rish damaging your ass hole.

 

Some porn stars do this so damn nice heheh A few I am familiar with them (females and males) and one thing I know for sure about them is, they are all into big toys or dicks in their videos they make. Doing it alone or with people, just know to take your time. I would say this is NOT for someone who have no idea what they are really doing anally still. Newbies. So you got to learn to understand your own ass and work your way to this over time. We all do not react in the same way or our ass are the same size and construction. So never take what someone say literally. There are sure to be something not similar. So go slow.

 

It can be months or a year before you can do big toy left alone gapes. There is some mental play that comes with this. A lot of time people endure painful sex is because they could not get pass the MENTAL equation. And also fearmongering from idiots who like to scare people about anal sex. Misguided advices. We heard them all in our circle.

 

Also, ask yourself. Are you someone who enjoy the stimulation of anal fucking. Have you tried dicks and toys beyond average size? It is only when you stretch it out at least thicker than normal size or shit size that you start to get into that next level erotic sensation. For some it seems more like "pain" they feel. Working up to bigger girth does require some conditioning and pain is a part of it. Barely. If done right.

 

For some, this stops them from going further but for adventurous that pain only a start to overcome to get to more sensually shiok. Again, this is something not for everyone. We who do it, know what we are in for and what the trade-off will be. Takes some walking through to get to this level of play. For guys who do, it is at another level of sexual sensory and experiences.

 

Definitely not for the conventional bottom. Needs commitment and deriving the right amount of pleasure and pain to pull this off. 

 

 

[luv2bnude]

@Bro Upshot,

 

Actually I am still a virgin leh, I only played with toys by myself only 😝  because I want to stay free of diseases (no offence to anybody, my million of apologies in advance)  😅 and most importantly, i do not have the 人缘 in BW。I tried making friends here for but it seems no one is willing to make the first move.  e.g after an initial session of info exchange and some intro msg, then it died off after xx days has gone by.  hahaha  

 

Can I be thick-skinned enough to ask you to be my friend if you don't mind a 47 yo? A real one and not always for this topic?

 

I think some points that you find it hard to explain I can experience myself.  eg I can make my anus area expand abit (similiar to one closing their mouth and make their cheeks bloated).  It is right trying to pass motion where one pushes the anus area muscle).  Did I interpret correctly?

 

 

Also to Bro Hole4use, thanks for sharing my sentiments.

 

 

[upshot]

4 hours ago, luv2bnude said:

@Bro Upshot,

Actually I am still a virgin leh, I only played with toys by myself only 😝  because I want to stay free of diseases (no offence to anybody, my million of apologies in advance)  😅 and most importantly, i do not have the 人缘 in BW。I tried making friends here for but it seems no one is willing to make the first move.  e.g after an initial session of info exchange and some intro msg, then it died off after xx days has gone by.  hahaha  

 

Well this topic of gaping, playing dildo especially larger ones..etc This is almost taboo as it is an ego busting topic or something to encourage in the face TOPS will have loose asses to play with if their BTM indulge in this. And for BTMs who are 'purist' and think it's taboo or in disgust to objects and enlarging their manpussy in a way to signal to TOPS theirs is a tight small hole. BS.. they will loosen too to some degree. Because you are now more relax and used to allow a cock inside you. You can not stop that from happening no matter how you do not believe it heheh.

 

For me, I say, it is your life. Your fun. No wrong or right. But beware of the trade off for doing this. Also not a topic you want to do without finding out if that guy you want to bang is into it heheh..

 

If you are a virgin to anal sex? You need to get use to average cock size or entry level dildo. That is your first stage. After that you work your way up to larger dildos or cocks if you can find them heheh.. Just kidding. You usually have to  look to dildos.

 

I think you need to understand why some are hesitant apart from this being a NOT SO POPULAR Practice..especially in Conservative Asia but there are a lot more people into this in the West and other parts. So meeting like-minded are not easy to do or to meet to have that kind of fun too. It is the way it is lah locally. AND there is that embarrassing situation that GAPING, ANAL TOY FUN, FISTING OR ANAL SEX is NOT EXCLUSIVE TO GAYS!!! Do not be misled that this is some "copyright" fun for just one group and if you do it, you are gay. I know of many previously and have discovered such groups online.

 

So if you want to do this with someone, there is that taboo of you are not gay and you like this. So how do you find someone gay or str8 to do this with and YET STAY PRIVATE and discreet? This is not exclusive to gaping, it is almost the same that can be said about even normal anal sex among str8. A str8 can try if he is daring enough to try getting fucked by a male and he too is worried once he do it, he is gay. Silly Stigmas like this in 2020 must die. Things like this make people in GENERAL nervous and this MAKES ACCEPTANCE BY PUBLIC HARDER.. NOT EASIER.

 

4 hours ago, luv2bnude said:

Can I be thick-skinned enough to ask you to be my friend if you don't mind a 47 yo? A real one and not always for this topic?

 

Well I am always here. 10 over years. I will try to answer base on what I went thorough for over 30 yrs of this. Being friends, well I have never had that happened often even though I am open to it in BW. Once sex do not happen soon, there is nothing to talk about or still not meet after weeks of PMs, they all go away 99.9% of the time, unfortunately. So I guess it is always about SEX. No sex I am not interested to know you further is like the main order of the day.

 

And that disappoints me more. Even if I am intending to meet but the topic is always about sex or dig more details on how I look and all that, if I sense it, I would rather cut it off. No sincerity. So ya, this is me. I am older than you and you would think I be very hard-up to have sex with anyone especially younger guys. Sorry, I have principles that I abide by just like everything else I write here in BW. I advise where I can and know what I am talking about. Even if you are someone I do not like or piss me off, I would still help out. Sex or no sex. I do not compromise till you meet me on a decent human level FIRST. Besides, I do not think of BW as my hookup site. To be a friend, that is even harder to find. heheh Who know? Maybe you will be that rare few. But that takes time. No one becomes friends over a few chats in BW and real life. Ask away if you have questions.

 

4 hours ago, luv2bnude said:

I think some points that you find it hard to explain I can experience myself.  eg I can make my anus area expand abit (similiar to one closing their mouth and make their cheeks bloated).  It is right trying to pass motion where one pushes the anus area muscle).  Did I interpret correctly?

 

Yes it is like that.. that pushing out motion. Like you are trying to push out a log of turb  But you have to be careful not to 'pinch' at the end like you do with shitting a log. Also you do not have to push hard.. you just want to feel like you are pushing outward without straining to do so. It has to progress to a point where as you get fuck, you try to relax and not try to feel the cock. At least that is how I do it.

 

Not sure about the bloated cheeks though heh I can not do that with my rectum for sure heheh

 

 

 

 

[Hole4use]

20 hours ago, luv2bnude said:

@Bro Upshot,

 

Actually I am still a virgin leh, I only played with toys by myself only 😝  because I want to stay free of diseases (no offence to anybody, my million of apologies in advance)  😅 and most importantly, i do not have the 人缘 in BW。I tried making friends here for but it seems no one is willing to make the first move.  e.g after an initial session of info exchange and some intro msg, then it died off after xx days has gone by.  hahaha  

 

Can I be thick-skinned enough to ask you to be my friend if you don't mind a 47 yo? A real one and not always for this topic?

 

I think some points that you find it hard to explain I can experience myself.  eg I can make my anus area expand abit (similiar to one closing their mouth and make their cheeks bloated).  It is right trying to pass motion where one pushes the anus area muscle).  Did I interpret correctly?

 

 

Also to Bro Hole4use, thanks for sharing my sentiments.

 

 

 

Well... I do hv a serious fetish about my own Butthole... Tho I had done a few tries of small gapes... Saw it on my own by using a mirror or after a guy used my butthole... I really do feel that gaping is a beautiful thing happening to one's butthole. 

[groupFunKL92]

damn. absolutely dig it when i fuck the guy and see his hole gaping, and fucking it with my tongue before putting my dick back to fill the gape. 

[upshot]

8 hours ago, groupFunKL92 said:

damn. absolutely dig it when i fuck the guy and see his hole gaping, and fucking it with my tongue before putting my dick back to fill the gape. 

 Make your toes curl heheh

[upshot]

Aside from the main topic of gape. In my view and this is only my observation over the years including conversing with guys I know.

 

Being able to appreciate and enjoy anal sex with toys and being comfortable with solo act are a good thing for BTMs and Flex WHERE getting on with age is concern. For TOPS I guess you hope you can keep your "magic rod" functioning well or there goes your sex life unless you can channel yourself to bottoming.

 

For us, being able to indulge in anal sex as BTMs and FLEX, you can almost keep this up till the end of your life heheh... You can little or at least for me, if I cum with a non-erect dick, that is fine with me. Even BTM-with-BTM fun as a couple is always an option. Maybe rare in Singapore, but we are slowly slowly catching up with the West. This is especially true. But Singapore is getting older, falling birth rate and this means more and more old folks about than young. And this is made the worst by gay population standards. Thus, I always feel if you are a picky be you a TOP or BTM who only like young lovers, your time is coming to an end soon. That's why I always say do not just think str8 community discriminate gay, even among gays there are different level of discrimination and unfair labels.

 

I appreciate that I still get guys wanting to hookup with me but I know one day soon, that day will come where no one wants to see this old naked upshot guy, left along want to fuck me. I still have options for my fun at the very least . I recall on xhamster this old guy, a cross dresser, who I think he is in his mid 60s at least, and he is just going at it with machine power fuck machine, and he enjoys his gaping and other sex act he puts on. heheh.. I say MORE POWER to that old chap. Rare to see this with Asian heheh..

 

I am not someone who is picky as I think that is not right.. if the chemistry is great, handsome or not, so long not obese and have bad body maintain like odour, sores on privates... I am game for fun. I just hope people do try to be more open and understanding with whom they choose to have sexual fun with.

 

Gaping is one such fun if you get into and want to seek others for it, it will not be a popular nor easy to find like-minded just want to throw that out there for all to know. Singapore gays are still very conservative. It will take time for progression. Maybe not our time but hopefully one day more guys can come together for this kind of fun without discrimination or shame.

 

 

[luv2bnude]

👏 👏👏 Bravo and well said.  Bro Upshot's england is very solid.  

[upshot]

19 minutes ago, luv2bnude said:

👏 👏👏 Bravo and well said.  Bro Upshot's england is very solid.  

Bro my England is bad,. that is why I type a lot to improve. I am dyslexic from child and I need to keep reading, watching a lot of podcast and typing English to keep going or it gets back to bad again heh

[ichigo_f]

22 hours ago, Hole4use said:

 

Well... I do hv a serious fetish about my own Butthole... Tho I had done a few tries of small gapes... Saw it on my own by using a mirror or after a guy used my butthole... I really do feel that gaping is a beautiful thing happening to one's butthole. 

nice i love this 

[Mr lemon]

On 11/25/2020 at 7:33 PM, upshot said:

Yup... quite a bit of anal play to 'condition' it. You also have to be pretty clean inside before you do that. You do not want something deep inside to be wiggling its way out heh...To prevent this, you not just need to clear out your rectum cavity (about  6-8inch deep) but need to flush pass your sigmoid curve and lower vertical colon. This ensures after an hour of enema/anal play you are still clear and unlikely to have 'brown accidents' Remember, natural motion of your colon pushing down shit happens constantly. It is like a conveyor belt. So best to clear shit deeper inside in advance so you buy yourself longer anal play time.

 

Another good reason for doing this deep enema is if like me, you enjoy deep dildo (17" long) fun. If you enjoy long duration anal sex like say, service as many guys in a spa, for example. Then deep enema helps a lot. It does take time. Anything from 30 mins to 1.5 hours to get water flowing out clear. I like that level of clean personally. I do this for the occasional online exhibitionist toy fun that can last 12 hours. So a good clean goes a long way. No pun intended. heh

 

You need to 'bore' your ass wide and deep with toy or cock thick enough to push against the wall of the rectum and sprinters muscle ring. That mean working your way from smaller objects to wider ones And you have to avoid flexing your muscle down there. You have to physically and mentally enable a pushing out to open wide motion and not clam down to the toy as you fuck it. It's hard to explain this bit but if you do enough big anal especially toys you know what I mean.

 

For me the best way to explain this is being in doggie position, I have a dildo with suction cup that I stick to a wall. In doggie style, I self hump that dildo to fuck me. As I bear down on it by pushing my rear against the dildo to get it inside. I have this mental image of telling my ass to open up wide and take it all in as I feel it stretch me out and barrel inside me. It's so shiok if you are into this. And you can feel it all. Something only a larger cock or toy can usually make happen. It's rather tactile. A guy can do it if he is big enough and your hole is still not overly experience with anal yet but as you get on with anal over the years, you find you need more upsize to feel the same. In a way you are enlarged a little but that same sensation now needs a boost to differential it normal. It's like cigarette smoking.. your first stick makes you giddy but the 3rd or 4th stick later in the day does so little to buzz you. For newbies who do not know what I mean.

 

To the point, a good size dildo with ample anal lube, you start to fuck that dildo in a rhythmic smooth motion and almost little friction but just enough sensation of feeling the bumps and texture of the cock or dildo moving in and out of you. That's the time you start to enjoy the fucking motion and before long, that sphincter muscle will relax. Your ass will start to get use to something being there and loosen up. As you pull yourself forward while still in doggie position to have the dildo pull out of your ass, you will have that gape. AGAIN, DO NOT FLEX on that dildo or cock all this time prior to pulling out.

 

Might not be large (depending on size of cock/toy) but you likely will see a gape or feels like a gape. You might still see a rosebud. But try putting a finger in and you feel it is like a soft 'curtain' but your finger goes in without any resistance or pressure. That's a gape still. You got your first start~!

 

To go bigger, well, of course you need to get a bigger toy. Working your way to bigger that is. Do not JUMP str8 to a big toy or rish damaging your ass hole.

 

Some porn stars do this so damn nice heheh A few I am familiar with them (females and males) and one thing I know for sure about them is, they are all into big toys or dicks in their videos they make. Doing it alone or with people, just know to take your time. I would say this is NOT for someone who have no idea what they are really doing anally still. Newbies. So you got to learn to understand your own ass and work your way to this over time. We all do not react in the same way or our ass are the same size and construction. So never take what someone say literally. There are sure to be something not similar. So go slow.

 

It can be months or a year before you can do big toy left alone gapes. There is some mental play that comes with this. A lot of time people endure painful sex is because they could not get pass the MENTAL equation. And also fearmongering from idiots who like to scare people about anal sex. Misguided advices. We heard them all in our circle.

 

Also, ask yourself. Are you someone who enjoy the stimulation of anal fucking. Have you tried dicks and toys beyond average size? It is only when you stretch it out at least thicker than normal size or shit size that you start to get into that next level erotic sensation. For some it seems more like "pain" they feel. Working up to bigger girth does require some conditioning and pain is a part of it. Barely. If done right.

 

For some, this stops them from going further but for adventurous that pain only a start to overcome to get to more sensually shiok. Again, this is something not for everyone. We who do it, know what we are in for and what the trade-off will be. Takes some walking through to get to this level of play. For guys who do, it is at another level of sexual sensory and experiences.

 

Personally doggy position works for me if I want to insert some big.

Take it easy, if it's hurting you then don't force it. There is no prize for rushing it. 

[luv2bnude]

https://a.aliexpress.com/_mqFASIN

 

Lol.. sex machine.

 

Using hp browser, sorry if link don't work as intended.  Also I'm not advertising this product

Edited December 2, 2020 by luv2bnude

[upshot]

32 minutes ago, luv2bnude said:

https://a.aliexpress.com/_mqFASIN

 

Lol.. sex machine.

 

Using hp browser, sorry if link don't work as intended.  Also I'm not advertising this product

WOW... that looks like an awesome machine. As it is more purposeful for technical usage but I can see it can be 'creatively' remodelled for some penetrating excavation work between one's legs LOL

 

But would the motor be able to take the stress of rotating the arm that will push and pull the rod heheheh...

 

 

[luv2bnude]

17 hours ago, upshot said:

WOW... that looks like an awesome machine. As it is more purposeful for technical usage but I can see it can be 'creatively' remodelled for some penetrating excavation work between one's legs LOL

 

But would the motor be able to take the stress of rotating the arm that will push and pull the rod heheheh...

 

I think we are going to move out of topic if we continue discsussing on this machine.  hehe

actually this one works the same as those sex machine found in aliexpress (of course latter will come with dildo or other accessories and cost more, i think) 

however, in real life application, i cant think of any usage of such machine.  lol

 

i did thought of buying but i changed my mind for I don't really use much unless freedom is guaranteed for me.

17 hours ago, upshot said:

 

 

 

[upshot]

15 minutes ago, luv2bnude said:

 

I think we are going to move out of topic if we continue discsussing on this machine.  hehe

actually this one works the same as those sex machine found in aliexpress (of course latter will come with dildo or other accessories and cost more, i think) 

however, in real life application, i cant think of any usage of such machine.  lol

 

i did thought of buying but i changed my mind for I don't really use much unless freedom is guaranteed for me.

 

Out of topic? not really .. if you want to put a gape, this machine makes it easier... The old man video in xhamster I mentioned, he uses this 90% of the time to get his large toy fun and gaping. heheheh

 

If you only want to do solo gaping at home, this helps a lot as you do not have to use your own hands. It is more awkward to doing it and then having to work yourself in a position see it without disrupting that gape. But this machine can be noisy heheh.. the good one I have seen cost almost 1k but they are quite quiet... if you have a family and you do this in your room like mine, the whole family will hear it hahahah....

Edited December 3, 2020 by upshot

[luv2bnude]

6 minutes ago, upshot said:

If you only want to do solo gaping at home, this helps a lot as you do not have to use your own hands. It is more awkward to doing it and then having to work yourself in a position see it without disrupting that gape. But this machine can be noisy heheh.. the good one I have seen cost almost 1k but they are quite quiet... if you have a family and you do this in your room like mine, the whole family will hear it hahahah....

 

agree that noise is one of the issue but those 1k machine is out of budget.  if no one is at home, some noise is still ok.  the faster the speed, the nosier it become.  

[upshot]

3 hours ago, luv2bnude said:

 

agree that noise is one of the issue but those 1k machine is out of budget.  if no one is at home, some noise is still ok.  the faster the speed, the nosier it become.  

They do sell that in Singapore... site where i buy my items, they also sell those sex machine heheh... I have seen video where they use really big dildos and long to plough home deep into them and the gape they get is out of this world man hehehe too ambitious even for me.

 

I guess there are people who would use that as part of their fun in Singapore but are more private and likely never in BW and might also be str8. I know of those folks who like getting fucked with toys but will never ever want another man in the room with them indulging in this.

 

[dldl]

https://xhamster2.com/videos/fingering-and-gape-xhrldaG

[luv2bnude]

I think he spoilt his anus because it looks weird to have his tissue popped out?

[upshot]

3 hours ago, luv2bnude said:

I think he spoilt his anus because it looks weird to have his tissue popped out?

That's a 'rosebud' as a slang term. Some people are into that and like it. But its natural especially when you go beyond average dick size. And you get that way about mid way into anal fun. You can get that way with penis or toy penetration. His ass is not spoilt. And that is NOT a prolapse if you want to call it that. 

 

But you want to make sure it does not get worst or have a prominent enlarged rosebud, you better not like to PUSH your shit out often as that will make this happen more often even when you are shitting or never bottom.

Edited December 30, 2020 by upshot

[chirunnerflex]

 

Muscle lean fit local Chinese boy looking for experienced fisting master to widen his sexual experience and hole. New to this and aims to get double fisted by end year. DM me?

[Hole4use]

Do tops like watching opened gaped hole? what's in the top mind when they see the hole gaped opened after they used it?

[sgmaven]

Well, those who want to gape, why not try the toys from Topped Toys? They even have a Gape Keeper Series!

 

 

This is the largest size of the series...😱

[Hole4use]

Do Tops Enjoy Watching Gapes? What's Going On In A Top's Mind When They See The Gape After Using The Butthole? What Are They Thinking At The Moment When They Pull Out And A Gaping Hole Appears In Front Of Them? 

[Hole4use]

Do Tops Enjoy Watching Gapes? What's Going On In A Top's Mind When They See The Gape After Using The Butthole? What Are They Thinking At The Moment When They Pull Out And A Gaping Hole Appears In Front Of Them? 

[Hole4use]

Gapes Are Still A Very Beautiful Thing To Me As A Btm.. Especially If I Have Chance To See My Own Butthole Gapes.. 

[Hole4use]

Is It Ever Possible to Have A Temporary Natural Gape Butthole After Getting Used By A Top?