How to transform from introvert to extrovert cheerful people?

[Guest Intro]

How to transform immediately from introvert to extrovert super cheerful and likeable person. How to develop super thick thick skin. No over and over thinking. No thinking the past nor future but present. Smile to everyone even they dont like you or I think they dont like me or have bad opinion about me. 

 

How to die and rise and transform into a phoenix. How to totally change a person inside outside? How to be more tough and resilient? How to be more stoic? How to be a different me? Wipe out all the programme in my mind? How to retrain myself from start again. How not to be afraid of people? How to be more confidence and brave? How to be a new me. A better me. How to find the another me in another parallel universe? I hate this version of me. How to travel through parallel universe?

[Guest MEME]

By not trying to be someone or something else, and stop "trying to be" and you will rise above the rest.

[auscent]

1. In general, be yourself - no need to hate urself so much.

2. Realise it's not all the times: There are times to speak up and times to shut up.

3. Identify: When it is time to speak up (eg: group input, welcome new team members, defend others), then speak up.

4. Take little steps: dont be too self conscious, ask abt others, elaborate ideas.

5. Practise, repeat.

 

I have a fren who is an introvert. She pushed herself to be flexible, now social worker defending youths. But she retains being an introvert.

 

[Pubic01]

Honestly, I hope there can be more introverts in this world, with lesser introverts trying so hard to convert themselves into pseudo-extroverts. When you are not truly you, you can never be truly at ease/happy. Introverts’ brain processing is different from that of extroverts. 
 

From the way you wrote your comment above, it’s tell-tale you’re not extrovert. Extrovert confirm cannot be so sensitive with words haha. Instead bring forth your introvert-gifts and insights into this world instead. 
 

Also, reserve your genuine smile and responses to genuine folks around you who are deserving  There’s no need to smile at everyone. It’s OK you know. 

Edited January 23, 2021 by Pubic01

[yuquidam]

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Edited January 23, 2021 by yuquidam

[yuquidam]

59 minutes ago, Pubic01 said:

Honestly, I hope there can be more introverts in this world, with lesser introverts trying so hard to convert themselves into pseudo-extroverts. When you are not truly you, you can never be truly at ease/happy. Introverts’ brain processing is different from that of extroverts. 
 

From the way you wrote your comment above, it’s tell-tale you’re not extrovert. Extrovert confirm cannot be so sensitive with words haha. Instead bring forth your introvert-gifts and insights into this world instead. 
 

Also, reserve your genuine smile and responses to genuine folks around you who are deserving  There’s no need to smile at everyone. It’s OK you know. 

*SUPER LIKE*

[Guest Intro]

47 minutes ago, Pubic01 said:

Honestly, I hope there can be more introverts in this world, with lesser introverts trying so hard to convert themselves into pseudo-extroverts. When you are not truly you, you can never be truly at ease/happy. Introverts’ brain processing is different from that of extroverts. 
 

From the way you wrote your comment above, it’s tell-tale you’re not extrovert. Extrovert confirm cannot be so sensitive with words haha. Instead bring forth your introvert-gifts and insights into this world instead. 
 

Also, reserve your genuine smile and responses to genuine folks around you who are deserving  There’s no need to smile at everyone. It’s OK you know. 

I don't know why I can't put a smile spontaneously when I bump into people. Is like a very big efforts like don't know how many tonnes of weight. Maybe got many assumptions in my head. Overthinking and sensitive. I was so anxious into looking at people that I was trying dissapear quickly whenever people coming through the door. I was weird. I know I am. I don't know why I am so panic. That one time, my big boss coming through the door and as usual I didnt look at people coming through the door after exiting the lift but quickly went into my direction without looking at anyone. Thats when I heard her saying " so not friend..." and also that time knew she's the big boss. I feel so deeply in shit. I know my manager will be very angry. My supervisor is arranging people to help me. They think I am stress or unhappy with work. Feel like my other colleague is not happy. I think I really need to slow down my work. The more I kan chiong with my work, want to get it done faster, the more serious I am I think. And look more stress to them. Or the less sociable I am to them. Or the more weird or anxious or less cheerful to them. 

[yuquidam]

Apologies. Just read your sharing above after posting. 

Deleted my posting as it's irrelevant to what you just shared and are going through. 

Edited January 23, 2021 by yuquidam

[Pubic01]

5 hours ago, Guest Intro said:

I don't know why I can't put a smile spontaneously when I bump into people. Is like a very big efforts like don't know how many tonnes of weight. Maybe got many assumptions in my head. Overthinking and sensitive. I was so anxious into looking at people that I was trying dissapear quickly whenever people coming through the door. I was weird. I know I am. I don't know why I am so panic. That one time, my big boss coming through the door and as usual I didnt look at people coming through the door after exiting the lift but quickly went into my direction without looking at anyone. Thats when I heard her saying " so not friend..." and also that time knew she's the big boss. I feel so deeply in shit. I know my manager will be very angry. My supervisor is arranging people to help me. They think I am stress or unhappy with work. Feel like my other colleague is not happy. I think I really need to slow down my work. The more I kan chiong with my work, want to get it done faster, the more serious I am I think. And look more stress to them. Or the less sociable I am to them. Or the more weird or anxious or less cheerful to them. 

From the way you describe above, it seems like it’s your mind jumping into overdrive. Haha.. you think people actually “work hard” during office hours? I tell you, many people just “act” like they are working hard . It’s quite common a tactic, just so they continue to get paid monthly with minimal commitment. Many people I know put their heart-felt commitment elsewhere. Work is just a tool for them to finance the other more important aspects in their life. At your current rate, and Kan-Kiong-ness, you’ll be burnt out in no time. 
 

As for smiling at work, just make a generic minimal polite smile using your cheek muscle (your eyes do not need to smile; save your heart-felt smile only for deserving people). See your office-smile and office-talk as tools to help you get through work. I think some people even get ahead in their careers just by mastering office-talk, office-smile, office-image (although their actual work outputs are average). 

Edited January 23, 2021 by Pubic01

[Steve5380]

12 hours ago, Guest Intro said:

I don't know why I can't put a smile spontaneously when I bump into people. Is like a very big efforts like don't know how many tonnes of weight. Maybe got many assumptions in my head. Overthinking and sensitive. I was so anxious into looking at people that I was trying dissapear quickly whenever people coming through the door. I was weird. I know I am. I don't know why I am so panic. That one time, my big boss coming through the door and as usual I didnt look at people coming through the door after exiting the lift but quickly went into my direction without looking at anyone. Thats when I heard her saying " so not friend..." and also that time knew she's the big boss. I feel so deeply in shit. I know my manager will be very angry. My supervisor is arranging people to help me. They think I am stress or unhappy with work. Feel like my other colleague is not happy. I think I really need to slow down my work. The more I kan chiong with my work, want to get it done faster, the more serious I am I think. And look more stress to them. Or the less sociable I am to them. Or the more weird or anxious or less cheerful to them. 

 

In most of what you describe, it is difficult to find a "why".  It just "is",  and it can make you miserable. 

In my humble opinion, one way to try to improve is in cultivating the feeling of happiness.  This feeling does not need any, not any justification.  It is stand-alone. it is like to pause to breathe deeply.  We can pause to conjure this feeling of happiness.  Another clue is not to expect immediate results.  The feeling of happiness works slowly, but the easier it becomes to bring up, the more effective it is.  

[Guest Derelict]

Last time when I was studying management course, people went round asking freshmen if they were extroverts or introverts. I said sometines I'm extroverted and in other situations introverted. They shook thier heads "no such thing". Later, I realised they asked because they preferred extroverted people as in business you need to be people orientated etc. 

 

What I did not like was the way they put down introverts. The lecturer went :"companies don't want people who are shy etc."  It doesn't mean introverts are anti social. They are just more reserved and think before they say anything. I've seen extroverts shoot their mouths off. Not good.

[lonelyglobe]

There is no such thing as immediate transformation. You can attend talks on public speaking, get a customer service related job, boost up your confidence, read and be knowleadgeable about a wide range of topics. 

[Guest Papaya]

Iu need to attend courses and read more books to build yr self confidence in facing people, by using lips service is not easy, u need action

[fab]

Similar to orientation,  I doubt that this personality thingy can be transformed. 

[Guest]

On 1/23/2021 at 1:31 PM, Guest Intro said:

How to transform immediately from introvert to extrovert super cheerful and likeable person. How to develop super thick thick skin. No over and over thinking. No thinking the past nor future but present. Smile to everyone even they dont like you or I think they dont like me or have bad opinion about me. 

 

How to die and rise and transform into a phoenix. How to totally change a person inside outside? How to be more tough and resilient? How to be more stoic? How to be a different me? Wipe out all the programme in my mind? How to retrain myself from start again. How not to be afraid of people? How to be more confidence and brave? How to be a new me. A better me. How to find the another me in another parallel universe? I hate this version of me. How to travel through parallel universe?

Ask yourself these questions:

1. Why do you think it’s no good to be an introvert and it’s great to be an extrovert?

2. Why do you want to be an extrovert in spite of knowing yourself to be an introvert?

3. What makes you think that an extrovert is confident and cheerful and an introvert is not?

it seems to me that you want to be confident and you are simplistic in your understanding of introversion vs extroversion. 
Let’s get a few things clear first. 
if you cannot accept yourself, there is no way you can make others accept you, introverted or extroverted.

Even if you become an extrovert, you will be more of a clown than anything. Have u seen some extroverted people who are plain annoying than pleasant cos they are so in your face and do not respect other people’s boundaries?

The idea of extroverted vs introverted is rather passé now. What is more valued now is authenticity that is being truthful and being yourself. Its no point being a fake extrovert who laughs like a hyena to hide their negative feelings. People are turned off by that. FYI extroverted people can also feel lonely and unaccepted even if they seem to be at ease with people.

This world needs a balance of introverted and extroverted people. There are many introverted people who are talented and valued for their talents and strengths. People don’t really care whether you are introverted or extroverted. They care more for you as an individual who contributes to the society. 

Edited January 24, 2021 by Guest

[tic-toc]

On 1/23/2021 at 6:31 AM, Guest Intro said:

How to transform immediately from introvert to extrovert super cheerful and likeable...find the another me in another parallel universe? I hate this version of me. How to travel through parallel universe?

Sorry to rain on your parade. It’s almost impossible to have immediate transformation. The most, you’ll get an impostor. 

 

Our character may alter a bit through life experiences. 

[Guest Ah Boy]

I am not an anti-social. I talk to the dead all the time

[mate69]

Impossible to do in SG
So hot and humid...mood also become foul instantly

makes you wanna just stay home and dont go out