40 & Single Discussion : Gay men over 45 far more likely to be single + How is gay life like after 40 years old & beyond (compiled)

[Guest Guest]

Younger days dunno how to tink so when old no money, no lover.  Now everyday wear slaggy n slipper, carry crossbody bag go public toilet stand outside wait for luck! 

[yoyo74]

On 4/18/2022 at 1:07 AM, Guest lonely said:

Have long given up finding a partner.

 

More worried of retirement now than anything. Focus on earning and saving money while taking care of my aged parents.

 

Just curious. How many of you have not bought your own house yet?

Nope not yet buy own house. Fail on around 3 attempts on 2 room HDB BTO lottery and started procrastinating. I have been procrastinating too long and finally made an irreversible decision transferring almost all of my OA to SA capping it to earn more interest. I was hoping to keep saving more and when i reach 55 i want to be able to push another amount to cap RA so that i could at least get around $2k per month without working until i die. Even if i dont have a house i could use those money to rent a small room and still be enough for my expanses. I have also buy some retirement plan policy from insurance so that i could get another monthly payout until i die. Now is still trying very hard to reach my financial goals and it wont be so easy for my lowly paid job.

[Guest Threshold of 50]

Thank you for this discussion. 

 

Comments from the younger folks reflect what the young thinks of the older. I’ve had those thoughts before. no surprise the young ones have them now too. It’s kind of a reality check. 

 

Entering 50, I am more worried about my physical age than my actual age. I’ve always looked younger than my age, but now definitely pass 40 looks wise. The body is also getting old - joint pain after intense exercise, less easily aroused etc. I looked back at my life and wished I had made use of my youth more to fool around and meet more people. Now being physically less ‘desirable’, I’ve become more reclusive and avoid looking at people whom I find attractive for fear of being regarded as a ‘dirty old man’.

 

Thus, I really appreciate the comments of the older (than me) participants. That people still appreciate the physique of older guys. To not be afraid of growing old is great advice. Easier said than done. Will attempt to better understand and practice this philosophy. 

[Steve5380]

On 5/5/2022 at 12:07 PM, Guest Threshold of 50 said:

Thank you for this discussion. 

 

Comments from the younger folks reflect what the young thinks of the older. I’ve had those thoughts before. no surprise the young ones have them now too. It’s kind of a reality check. 

 

Entering 50, I am more worried about my physical age than my actual age. I’ve always looked younger than my age, but now definitely pass 40 looks wise. The body is also getting old - joint pain after intense exercise, less easily aroused etc. I looked back at my life and wished I had made use of my youth more to fool around and meet more people. Now being physically less ‘desirable’, I’ve become more reclusive and avoid looking at people whom I find attractive for fear of being regarded as a ‘dirty old man’.

 

Thus, I really appreciate the comments of the older (than me) participants. That people still appreciate the physique of older guys. To not be afraid of growing old is great advice. Easier said than done. Will attempt to better understand and practice this philosophy. 

 

Keep doing what you know is good for you,  along the way you may add some healthy habits of longevity, and you won't have any problems with aging.  It is true that biological age is what counts, not physical age. One day you may approach the 80, and find that it is not a big deal, like I am experiencing.  The aging of the body depends on may factors, some under our control. At the beginning of the 70s I was feeling some mild joint pains,  arthritis?,  and with the following 6 years of practicing a martial art with plenty of stretching, falling, working out, etc.  these pains went away.  It is like "use it and don't lose it".  It is true that our recoveries are slower, but then, we usually have all the time in the world.

 

You can look back at your youth and wish you had lived in a faster lane, with more orgies, parties, etc. but... the more fun you had in the past, won't you miss it the more in the future?  The past goes away, and unless we developed serious addictions, it could vanish from our mind.  As we age, the urges of our flesh diminish, until they vanish completely, I suppose.  And then we have one less problem, more freedom to become more spiritual, more social.

 

If you become a senior while retaining some handsomeness, you may find still some attractive women smiling at you.  The gender is not the right one, but it still will give you much pride and motivation.  By all means you can avoid becoming a recluse and fear looking at attractive people.  There is no law against looking.  If you age successfully, dirty or not dirty you deserve respect.  And those who don't give it to you, don't deserve your consideration.

 

[Guest MatureMuscle]

Except for a few hardcore, sex life goes down after 50.  You have to DIY more often.  Tone and muscular 50s are rare and hard to find.

[Guest Rental]

On 5/2/2022 at 3:56 PM, yoyo74 said:

Nope not yet buy own house. Fail on around 3 attempts on 2 room HDB BTO lottery and started procrastinating. I have been procrastinating too long and finally made an irreversible decision transferring almost all of my OA to SA capping it to earn more interest. I was hoping to keep saving more and when i reach 55 i want to be able to push another amount to cap RA so that i could at least get around $2k per month without working until i die. Even if i dont have a house i could use those money to rent a small room and still be enough for my expanses. I have also buy some retirement plan policy from insurance so that i could get another monthly payout until i die. Now is still trying very hard to reach my financial goals and it wont be so easy for my lowly paid job.

 

Better to get your own flat than renting a room.   Rental is going up very high, and a common HDB room in good location is now fetching $1k per month.  How to survive with just $2k per month ?  When you buy your own flat, you can still rent out one room which is definitely more than your interest put inside the CPF.

[Guest Guest]

Is stupid to rent a room that dun belongs to you at the end of the day. 

Pls go get a hse n use tat money to pay ur housing loan. Is more practical to pay a hse u r owning it. 

[Guest Threshold of 50]

On 5/6/2022 at 3:46 AM, Steve5380 said:

 

Keep doing what you know is good for you,  along the way you may add some healthy habits of longevity, and you won't have any problems with aging.  It is true that biological age is what counts, not physical age. One day you may approach the 80, and find that it is not a big deal, like I am experiencing.  The aging of the body depends on may factors, some under our control. At the beginning of the 70s I was feeling some mild joint pains,  arthritis?,  and with the following 6 years of practicing a martial art with plenty of stretching, falling, working out, etc.  these pains went away.  It is like "use it and don't lose it".  It is true that our recoveries are slower, but then, we usually have all the time in the world.

 

You can look back at your youth and wish you had lived in a faster lane, with more orgies, parties, etc. but... the more fun you had in the past, won't you miss it the more in the future?  The past goes away, and unless we developed serious addictions, it could vanish from our mind.  As we age, the urges of our flesh diminish, until they vanish completely, I suppose.  And then we have one less problem, more freedom to become more spiritual, more social.

 

If you become a senior while retaining some handsomeness, you may find still some attractive women smiling at you.  The gender is not the right one, but it still will give you much pride and motivation.  By all means you can avoid becoming a recluse and fear looking at attractive people.  There is no law against looking.  If you age successfully, dirty or not dirty you deserve respect.  And those who don't give it to you, don't deserve your consideration.

 

Thank you for the beautiful response. 

[Guest ShoppingBag]

I will be turning 40 next month and getting my 2rm bto keys in Q3 this year (successful in first try at 35 but gosh 5yrs of waiting). Since my 2rm bto is fully covered by cpf, i decided that i will transfer the balance from my cpf OA to SA after paying the bto to earn compund interest for my retirement. My current job pay is decent and i have been saving 1/3 of my pay since 30 and another 1/3 to my stocks investment. I am planning to semi retire at 45yrs old - taking up a part time job to cover utilities and my insurance plan (till 65).

 

Planning to fully retire at 50 and if my also single older sister's health is ok, I will apply for retirement visa in Thailand and rent out my 2rm bto whole unit and use the rent money and cash out investments to stretch my money for 10-15yrs stay there. On the other hand if my sister's health is not so good, i will rent out my whole 2rm bto unit and move back to stay with my sister at our late parents house. With my rent, savings, investment and her huge savings (cos she has a high paying job but extremely thifty person lol) we can quit our jobs at 50 and live decent till we kick the bucket.

 

We decided that we should have the concept to die with zero and enjoy our lives at best possible. In our grey hair days to live a minimalist lifestyle (give away or get rid of most possessions) and survive on the cpf retirement payout (whatever we can afford and live with dignity than to beg for social assistance). We signed the Advanced Medical Directive that should either of us succumbed to terminal illnes or unresponsive to medical treatment, the doctor will just pull the plug without having either of us to make the tough decision. We also signed the full body donation to NUS medical school for the training doctors to practise so that it will free the other person having to go through the funeral process. That will be my life plan 😌 

[fitcubsg]

On 4/17/2022 at 11:13 PM, Guest Guest said:

Quite sad tho..... 

Juz like many keep saying "size doesn't matter " but e truth is "size does matter"

Put e 2 size together n see who got more taker. 

Such is life right? I am 49, I don’t show my face but people who know me, know that I look young for my age but fellow Asians won’t date me because of my age but foreigners in general are beyond that, I just keep doing what I do, go to Barry’s, keep fit, live well, do the job I love most which is in design and keep at it. Having someone is an added bonus but growing old and alone is not bad as long as you have establish your purpose, keep your mind busy, enjoy life as it offers. 

[Steve5380]

On 5/14/2022 at 9:58 PM, fitcubsg said:

Such is life right? I am 49, I don’t show my face but people who know me, know that I look young for my age but fellow Asians won’t date me because of my age but foreigners in general are beyond that, I just keep doing what I do, go to Barry’s, keep fit, live well, do the job I love most which is in design and keep at it. Having someone is an added bonus but growing old and alone is not bad as long as you have establish your purpose, keep your mind busy, enjoy life as it offers. 

 

You just gave an example that everyone should aim for,  yet few follow it because they don't think they need it, or they don't know about it, or if they know they are not willing to make the effort required.

 

I just received pictures from my former high school peers who celebrated 60 years after graduation.  I could not join them because I live so far away and I didn't plan to travel.   I found that they all look like if they could be an older father of mine that I should care for and make life comfortable in his last years.  Yet they are my same age.  It does not surprise me because it is the typical look in straight society by people who don't think that they could be any different because their condition is "natural" for their age.  They are all excellent, decent men who didn't age so much because of addictions or abuse, but simply because they accepted it as the norm which other people like their elders followed too.

 

We are the fortunate ones who became aware that we have some choices in the way we age.

[InBangkok]

On 5/15/2022 at 11:04 AM, Steve5380 said:

I found that they all look like if they could be an older father of mine that I should care for and make life comfortable in his last years.  Yet they are my same age.

No doubt that, unlike you, they decided to forego spending some of their hard earned cash on face-lifts, hair transplants and regular botox injections as you have informed us you do. We all make our choices in the way we appear to age!

[InBangkok]

On 5/8/2022 at 2:42 PM, Guest ShoppingBag said:

Planning to fully retire at 50 and if my also single older sister's health is ok, I will apply for retirement visa in Thailand and rent out my 2rm bto whole unit and use the rent money and cash out investments to stretch my money for 10-15yrs stay there.

I wish you the best of luck in attaining your goals. As for living in Thailand, life here is certainly cheaper than Singapore. But please remember healthcare costs. You need to have a very good medical policy if you plan on treatments at the private hospitals in Thailand. In your 50s the premium should not be high. But by the time you get into your 70s and 80s, plan on very substantial increases.

 

Also consider that the cost of retirement visas in Thailand has been going up. The one-year renewable visa will require an inward pension remittance of around S$2,600 or a minimum savings of S$32,000 virtually locked in a deposit account until you die. The pension remittance has remained the same for around 20 years or more and is rumoured to be going up soon. The alternative is to take out a 20 year Thailand Elite visa which can still be purchased for around S$40,000 but you get none of that back at the end of the term. You will still need an annual re-entry visa if you plan on travel but that is a very modest additional S$155 annually.

[earth_tone]

Subject header is really true, very likely to stay single after 45 if gay and not already attached by this age. You'll feel weaker in every sense of the word, physically less driven for many things including love. Even if you're still young looking and athletically fit on the outside, your mind is gonna be at least 5 years older. Friends will start to drift, close ones will start to pop their clogs one by one, and vision of that perfect guy is seemingly much more blurry somehow until he no longer matter because you tell yourself I'm fine alone and I'm not lonely but you are alone, and lonely 

 

Disclaimer: JUST MY OPINION. If you disagree, good for you, lots of karmic credit you've gotten there for yourself

[Steve5380]

On 5/15/2022 at 8:46 AM, InBangkok said:

No doubt that, unlike you, they decided to forego spending some of their hard earned cash on face-lifts, hair transplants and regular botox injections as you have informed us you do. We all make our choices in the way we appear to age!

 

I am sure that their earnings are much lower than that of people in the US.   But conversely, the cost of healthcare is much lower in Argentina.

 

It does not need to come to plastic surgery.  My beloved high school peers, although quite intelligent and educated, don't feel any attraction to gyms  ( sounds familiar?, he he ).  While I just came back from my gym after one hour of heavy leg presses,  calf presses and bench presses,  a place I visit 4 times a week,  they get up in the morning and eat a rich breakfast of the good food there.  In the afternoon, they may watch a good football game while drinking some beer on the couch,  not much because they are not alcoholics,  and the dinner is equally rich.   They probably have never heard of intermittent fasting.  And they don't use facial products,  because this is something for girls.

[Steve5380]

On 5/15/2022 at 9:26 AM, earth_tone said:

Subject header is really true, very likely to stay single after 45 if gay and not already attached by this age. You'll feel weaker in every sense of the word, physically less driven for many things including love. Even if you're still young looking and athletically fit on the outside, your mind is gonna be at least 5 years older. Friends will start to drift, close ones will start to pop their clogs one by one, and vision of that perfect guy is seemingly much more blurry somehow until he no longer matter because you tell yourself I'm fine alone and I'm not lonely but you are alone, and lonely 

 

Disclaimer: JUST MY OPINION. If you disagree, good for you, lots of karmic credit you've gotten there for yourself

 

The thread header may be true,  but "very likely" should be just "likely".  

 

Maybe 80% of gays over 45 are single, compared to 40% of gays under 45?   It's very probable that all of us are among the 90% of the most educated and most secure humans in the world.  Is it so difficult to be among the 10% most blessed humans?  Should it be so difficult to be among the 20% or so gays over 45 who have a relationship?  And this is among the ones WHO HAVE a relationship.   More significant should be to consider the percent over 45 WHO ARE ABLE to have a relationship.  This percent could be above 50%.  

 

To be a gorgeous young model is not a requisite to become attached.  It could even be the opposite.  Most gays over 45 should be able to be mature and handsome.  It requires some effort, but not out of reach.  We should be able to recognize what we want in a relationship, and diversify our goals away from simply hot sex.

 

Why when being over 45, our mind starts drifting from the exuberance of youth and the habit of partying, going to discos, bars, always hanging around with friends?  This may not be the effect of aging,  but it can be a widening of our horizons and finding that these activities of the young are kind of dumb, often worthless, and a way of wasting away our limited life.

 

This is what I think now that I am nearly 80 y.o.  I will not waste my time socializing and partying, but only do it a little bit. I even find a waste to continue being productive in the workforce, which I could perfectly do.  I don't even want to dedicate much time to travel, because I have done this enough and I am the same person no matter where I go.  My priority now is ME, ME, ME.  My happiness, my satisfaction, my inner self, my speculations about life, my enjoyment of art.   I am single, but not lonely. Far from it.  I was 55 when I started a great relationship with my late bf,  20 years my junior, that lasted over two decades.  Now I still have people who love me, and whom I love. 

[InBangkok]

On 5/15/2022 at 9:29 PM, Steve5380 said:

It does not need to come to plastic surgery. 

I am sure your analysis of the lives your peers lead is pretty close to the truth. There must come a point in most people's lives when they cease to take much care of their bodies. 

[Steve5380]

On 5/15/2022 at 10:38 AM, InBangkok said:

I am sure your analysis of the lives your peers lead is pretty close to the truth. There must come a point in most people's lives when they cease to take much care of their bodies. 

 

This is one benefit we get as gays:  while most straight men, especially those who are heads of family, consider that taking care of their looks is pure vanity and unbecoming for them,  our interest to be attractive can open the door for remaining handsome and healthy. There seems to be an association :  good looks <--> good health.

 

[manehiso]

Inspiring reads, to say the least.. 

[Steve5380]

On 5/15/2022 at 11:01 AM, manehiso said:

Inspiring reads, to say the least.. 

 

Not as inspiring as what I just saw on TV:  the program/advertisement  "Emeril Everyday" by famous chief Emeril Lagasse, promoting his Air Fryer 360.   God Heavens!  What divine food!  It made my mouth water all over!  These are delicacies worth of a king.

 

You eat these delicacies regularly,  and you will have the best assurance to acquire:   diabetes, morbid obesity, heart attacks, strokes, fatty liver, and perhaps early Alzheimer's, ah, and also cancers.  But... who will take away what you have enjoyed before age 40?

 

 

 

No wonder the life expectancy in America is going down.

 

OHHH... I hope that none of our nice young and older gays get tempted watching this!!!  Remember, fighting temptations forms character.  Give all this the shoulder and instead cook your lentils with vegetables !

.

Edited May 16, 2022 by Steve5380

[InBangkok]

On 5/16/2022 at 1:02 AM, Steve5380 said:

 

Not as inspiring as what I just saw on TV:  the program/advertisement  "Emeril Everyday" by famous chief Emeril Lagasse, promoting his Air Fryer 360.   God Heavens!  What divine food!  It made my mouth water all over!  These are delicacies worth of a king.

 

You eat these delicacies regularly,  and you will have the best assurance to acquire:   diabetes, morbid obesity, heart attacks, strokes, fatty liver, and perhaps early Alzheimer's, ah, and also cancers.  But... who will take away what you have enjoyed before age 40?

 

 

 

No wonder the life expectancy in America is going down.

 

OHHH... I hope that none of our nice young and older gays get tempted watching this!!!  Remember, fighting temptations forms character.  Give all this the shoulder and instead cook your lentils with vegetables !

I wonder what that post has to do with the subject of the thread and gays over 45 being single. Diet has little effect on being single or partnered. I know several gay men in several countries who are overweight but happily partnered. There are quite a number of guys out there who prefer chubby partners. Equally I know gay guys who are in much better shape and are also partnered. Issues relating to lentils and vegetables should be where you discussed them - in the relevant thread about Gays Who Will Be Seniors One Day.

[Steve5380]

On 5/16/2022 at 10:41 PM, InBangkok said:

I wonder what that post has to do with the subject of the thread and gays over 45 being single. Diet has little effect on being single or partnered. I know several gay men in several countries who are overweight but happily partnered. There are quite a number of guys out there who prefer chubby partners. Equally I know gay guys who are in much better shape and are also partnered. Issues relating to lentils and vegetables should be where you discussed them - in the relevant thread about Gays Who Will Be Seniors One Day.

 

This thread is about gay men over 45 and also over 40 years old and beyond.  These seem to be the gays who will be seniors one day, or are seniors already.  There is a link between diet and being single or partnered, and this is the tendency to eat more if the partner is an excellent cook who enjoys feeding his partner rich meals.

[InBangkok]

On 5/17/2022 at 10:56 AM, Steve5380 said:

There is a link between diet and being single or partnered, and this is the tendency to eat more if the partner is an excellent cook who enjoys feeding his partner rich meals.

There is zero link between diet and being single or partnered. Where did you happen to dig that little nugget from? It's nonsense!

[fitcubsg]

On 5/17/2022 at 3:01 PM, InBangkok said:

There is zero link between diet and being single or partnered. Where did you happen to dig that little nugget from? It's nonsense!

Why isnt there a link......:-) when you are partnered, as Steve said, your partner is good cook and so, you get well fed, when you are single, you are in the market for a partner, that being said, you want to look and feel your best, so you eat wisely, exercise and don't overindulge. Actually, even when you are partnered, self preservation is also important because how you look, reflects on your partner. Anyways, to each their own, live in moderation is the best, everyone out there has a market to call their own. Things change, its the choices you make....

[Why?]

On 4/18/2021 at 7:22 PM, Expired Btm Uncle said:

Just be yourself and maintain a positive outlook. Age gracefully.

Singapore is a harsh place for the elderly.  Not just about rejection, but the extreme high cost of living.  The G's duty to make you happy is during election period, once they have a piece of your meat you are then discarded like an empty shells.

Edited May 17, 2022 by Why?

[InBangkok]

On 5/17/2022 at 5:01 PM, fitcubsg said:

Why isnt there a link......:-) when you are partnered, as Steve said, your partner is good cook and so, you get well fed, when you are single, you are in the market for a partner, that being said, you want to look and feel your best, so you eat wisely, exercise and don't overindulge. Actually, even when you are partnered, self preservation is also important because how you look, reflects on your partner. Anyways, to each their own, live in moderation is the best, everyone out there has a market to call their own. Things change, its the choices you make....

There isn't a link because the point made by @Steve5380 and repeated by your good self states that your partner is a good cook. Where do you get that from? It is certainly far from the truth with the couples I know. I am a very basic cook and my partner is the same. Besides he works hard and rarely is home early enough to make dinner. That we eat out a lot is far from unusual in Asia. The key is eating a varied diet and not overeating, especially in snacking during the days.

 

Of course everyone wants to look their best but diet plays little part in that unless you totally let yourself go,  overeat consistently and rarely exercise. I do agree, though, that everything in moderation is a good maxim for life.

[Steve5380]

On 5/17/2022 at 9:20 PM, InBangkok said:

There isn't a link because the point made by @Steve5380 and repeated by your good self states that your partner is a good cook. Where do you get that from? It is certainly far from the truth with the couples I know. I am a very basic cook and my partner is the same. Besides he works hard and rarely is home early enough to make dinner. That we eat out a lot is far from unusual in Asia. The key is eating a varied diet and not overeating, especially in snacking during the days.

 

Of course everyone wants to look their best but diet plays little part in that unless you totally let yourself go,  overeat consistently and rarely exercise. I do agree, though, that everything in moderation is a good maxim for life.

 

People who do everything in moderation end up with a worth that is only moderate.  While moderation is not bad, to do better than moderate definitively gives better results.

 

You are wrong.  A partner who is a good cook is an asset.  Eating mostly in restaurants is a poor choice. Read:

 

https://www.healthline.com/health-news/dining-at-restaurants-is-a-recipe-for-unhealthy-eating#:~:text=Researchers say eating at restaurants,are of poor dietary quality.

 

"Dining at restaurants is a recipe for unhealthy eating".

 

In my family we seldom eat at restaurants.  I practically never do it.  The same for my sister.  My busy son the surgeon is an excellent cook, and he cooks for his family every day. 

 

And you yourself are not a role model of fitness.  From your own data that you posted in your profile, I calculated a while ago that your body mass index is high,  sign of unhealthy obesity.  Hopefully you are able to correct this.

[InBangkok]

On 5/18/2022 at 9:56 AM, Steve5380 said:

People who do everything in moderation end up with a worth that is only moderate.  While moderation is not bad, to do better than moderate definitively gives better results.

 

You are wrong.  A partner who is a good cook is an asset.  Eating mostly in restaurants is a poor choice.

Have I ever written that a partner who is a good cook is not an asset? Never! So do not put words in my mouth!

You should leave others to look after themselves. You can go back to your constant diet of boring beans and lentils and 5 day water diets. I am prepared to bet that no other reader of this forum considers this a diet they remotely wish to follow.

Edited May 18, 2022 by InBangkok

[InBangkok]

Sorry, duplicate

Edited May 18, 2022 by InBangkok

[Steve5380]

On 5/17/2022 at 10:26 PM, InBangkok said:

Sorry, duplicate

 

It does not matter.  You wrote so many times that my diet is boring and that I do 5 days fasting.  And you want to bet that no other reader here would follow my diet  (not the fasting, this is your fantasy)?   You now have the vice of gambling too?

[InBangkok]

On 5/18/2022 at 10:59 AM, Steve5380 said:

 

It does not matter.  You wrote so many times that my diet is boring and that I do 5 days fasting.  And you want to bet that no other reader here would follow my diet  (not the fasting, this is your fantasy)?   You now have the vice of gambling too?

How unusually correct you are this time. I am certain gambling is not permitted in this forum. But if any member other than you posts that he eats a diet of beans and lentils and goes on 5 day water fasts, I will with happiness make a donation to a charity to assist hill tribe children with their education.

[Steve5380]

On 5/18/2022 at 2:08 AM, InBangkok said:

How unusually correct you are this time. I am certain gambling is not permitted in this forum. But if any member other than you posts that he eats a diet of beans and lentils and goes on 5 day water fasts, I will with happiness make a donation to a charity to assist hill tribe children with their education.

 

Go ahead and make your donation.  I don't "go on 5 day water fasts".  The longest I have fasted is 4 days,  ONCE.  But thank you for reminding me.  It is time that I should try again to fast for the 5 days.

[InBangkok]

On 5/18/2022 at 8:05 PM, Steve5380 said:

Go ahead and make your donation.  I don't "go on 5 day water fasts".  The longest I have fasted is 4 days,  ONCE.  But thank you for reminding me.  It is time that I should try again to fast for the 5 days.

You do not even read. I clearly stated "ANY MEMBER OTHER THAN YOU." The donation will be made when any other member in good standing confirms that he lives on your incredibly boring diets.

[Steve5380]

On 5/18/2022 at 8:17 AM, InBangkok said:

You do not even read. I clearly stated "ANY MEMBER OTHER THAN YOU." The donation will be made when any other member in good standing confirms that he lives on your incredibly boring diets.

 

Gambling again....

[manehiso]

Ok let's get back to the topic now, shall we? 

[InBangkok]

On 5/18/2022 at 9:04 PM, manehiso said:

Ok let's get back to the topic now, shall we? 

Good idea to get away from @Steve5380's stupid remarks.

 

I'm not sure I agree with the sentiments of some of the posters that gay men over 45 are far more likely to be single. Much will depend on whether those under 45 have had been in relationships and prefer such a state to being single. Relationships take time to develop and mature. Those under 45 may be working too hard to pay off mortgages, purchasing cars and other goods they consider necessary for their lifestyle as well as in the hope of amassing sufficient investments for retirement - maybe even early retirement. Many may simply enjoy a single life or one with occasional affairs.

 

The assumption then can be that forming relationships will be difficult once those goals have been reached. But that assumption need not be true. @Steve5380 is one example of a gay man who found his ideal partner in his 50s. Relationships are based on a wide variety of factors which may differ from one relationship to another. Most will be based not just on sex but a deep feeling of love for another guy, working together to maintain the relationship and especially the need to each to compromise.

[Steve5380]

On 5/18/2022 at 10:19 PM, InBangkok said:

 

Good idea to get away from @Steve5380's stupid remarks.

 

 

He is referring to your constant stupid attempts at provoking me, here as in so many other threads.

[InBangkok]

On 5/19/2022 at 11:05 AM, Steve5380 said:

He is referring to your constant stupid attempts at provoking me, here as in so many other threads.

How stupid! I do nothing of the sort. Provoking you? How is possible for you to be provoked when you have told us many times how calm you are and happy in your life. This from October 2020 -

 

"We can adopt some positive philosophy of life that calms us down and makes us realise that he who gets angry .... loses"

 

Time to show that positivity and calm.

[Steve5380]

On 5/18/2022 at 11:41 PM, InBangkok said:

How stupid! I do nothing of the sort. Provoking you? How is possible for you to be provoked when you have told us many times how calm you are and happy in your life. This from October 2020 -

 

"We can adopt some positive philosophy of life that calms us down and makes us realise that he who gets angry .... loses"

 

Time to show that positivity and calm.

 

Yes, it is stupid what you do.  Because it is perfectly feasible that there is a provoker,  without there being a "provokee." You can provoke me all you want,  but it is my calm decision that determines if I accept the provocation or if I just blow it off, which is what I do.  I just calmly practice my typing writing an "@InBangkok- zapper" post and then think about something else. 

 

We gays over 45 can reach a state of peace and calm that is the perfect shield against other older men who cannot overcome their bitterness and malevolence.

 

[InBangkok]

On 5/19/2022 at 11:08 PM, Steve5380 said:

We gays over 45 can reach a state of peace and calm that is the perfect shield against other older men who cannot overcome their bitterness and malevolence.

What makes you write such nonsense, I wonder? You who have over years called a variety of posters a variety of foul epithets, even swearing at some. So much for your "state of peace and calm"! You even wrote in another forum, "It is fortunate that I am flexible and not argumentative at all." Yes, you really wrote that. You are such a fraud!

 

You are the one who also wrote "your attempts to insult seniors here are as evil as they are stupid." You have just called older men bitter and malevolent! Yet there is no-one in this forum who is older than you.

 

You called one poster "a lunatic scumbag." You called another "mentally handicapped." In this Singapore forum, you wrote that "I felt bored even in Sentosa Island." Of one young Singaporean you wrote, "Your picture here shows how stupid you are." And you complained about posts being made in Chinese because you did not understand them! Such a fraud!

 

So much for your spending so much time in a Singapore forum! And don't forget you have been banned several times. That's a record not many can claim. Wahahahaha!

[Steve5380]

On 5/19/2022 at 11:09 PM, InBangkok said:

What makes you write such nonsense, I wonder? You who have over years called a variety of posters a variety of foul epithets, even swearing at some. So much for your "state of peace and calm"! You even wrote in another forum, "It is fortunate that I am flexible and not argumentative at all." Yes, you really wrote that. You are such a fraud!

 

You are the one who also wrote "your attempts to insult seniors here are as evil as they are stupid." You have just called older men bitter and malevolent! Yet there is no-one in this forum who is older than you.

 

You called one poster "a lunatic scumbag." You called another "mentally handicapped." In this Singapore forum, you wrote that "I felt bored even in Sentosa Island." Of one young Singaporean you wrote, "Your picture here shows how stupid you are." And you complained about posts being made in Chinese because you did not understand them! Such a fraud!

 

So much for your spending so much time in a Singapore forum! And don't forget you have been banned several times. That's a record not many can claim. Wahahahaha!

 

This resentful poster can only write about the nonsense that is so important to him, because he has nothing positive to contribute to this thread.

[InBangkok]

On 5/20/2022 at 8:29 PM, Steve5380 said:

This resentful poster can only write about the nonsense that is so important to him, because he has nothing positive to contribute to this thread.

Hahahaaha! Yet another of your posts which, as you have told us so many boring times, you write in jest! Wahahahaha!

[Steve5380]

On 5/20/2022 at 9:47 AM, InBangkok said:

Hahahaaha! Yet another of your posts which, as you have told us so many boring times, you write in jest! Wahahahaha!

 

Does anyone have a spreader of FLIT to scare this pesky bug away?  This will allow us to happily return to the subject of this thread.

[InBangkok]

On 5/21/2022 at 3:00 AM, Steve5380 said:

Does anyone have a spreader of FLIT to scare this pesky bug away?  This will allow us to happily return to the subject of this thread.

Does FLIT exist in Singapore? I believe not and it illustrates to forum members yet again @Steve5380's lack of knowledge of Asia outside its gay saunas of which he was some sort of expert. Flit generally means to move from one place of residence to another. What an odd question? No doubt @Steve5380 just being his silly, funny old man self again. All his posts are full of jest - as he keeps on telling us.

[earth_tone]

On 5/21/2022 at 2:47 PM, InBangkok said:

Does FLIT exist in Singapore? I believe not and it illustrates to forum members yet again @Steve5380's lack of knowledge of Asia outside its gay saunas of which he was some sort of expert. Flit generally means to move from one place of residence to another. What an odd question? No doubt @Steve5380 just being his silly, funny old man self again. All his posts are full of jest - as he keeps on telling us.

That is why I never reply to him at all. 

 

 

Second half of the topic :

Gay life after 40 years old should be fulfilling and relax. You should have found that one job that you like and your inner circle of friends to keep you company. Also spend more time with family.

Edited May 21, 2022 by earth_tone

[Steve5380]

On 5/21/2022 at 1:47 AM, InBangkok said:

 

Does FLIT exist in Singapore? I believe not and it illustrates to forum members yet again @Steve5380's lack of knowledge of Asia outside its gay saunas of which he was some sort of expert. 

 

 

It would not be the first time your belief is wrong.  Even in a small population of 5 million, how can be "believe" that a popular insecticide does not exist or has not existed at all?  Gays over 40 yo should have heard about it.  Even the Smithsonian has a good description of it:

 

https://americanhistory.si.edu/collections/search/object/nmah_1135466

 

Since you are over 40,  and perhaps double this much,  my choice of FLIT was adequate as an insecticide for you,  it should be strong enough,  although there are more modern insecticides around.

[Steve5380]

On 5/21/2022 at 9:32 AM, earth_tone said:

 

Gay life after 40 years old should be fulfilling and relax. You should have found that one job that you like and your inner circle of friends to keep you company. Also spend more time with family.

 

 

Gay life after 40 should not be the same as gay life after 60 or 80.  Gays in their 40s should be still full of life, without need for much "relax",  but with big plans for the coming decades.  The 40s is a time for men to be involved with THEIR family, meaning spouse and children.  Gay men don't need to be so different.  If not a wife and their own children,  then with a partner and adopted children.  And the 40s is not necessarily the time to have found the ultimate job or activity, but there is still plenty of time to discover a true vocation.

[InBangkok]

On 5/21/2022 at 9:56 PM, Steve5380 said:

Even in a small population of 5 million, how can be "believe" that a popular insecticide does not exist or has not existed at all?  Gays over 40 yo should have heard about it.

Another ridiculous and ridiculously wrong comment. Why would anyone in a country where this product has never been sold be expected to know that the product exists? That makes no sense! You believe you are so worldly wise that you know gays over 40 in Singapore must know about the product named FLIT? That is an example of your supreme arrogance! No doubt you believe Singaporeans and many Asians in general should know the products Tropical Sunrise and Moonlight Breeze.

[Steve5380]

On 5/25/2022 at 10:54 PM, InBangkok said:

Another ridiculous and ridiculously wrong comment. Why would anyone in a country where this product has never been sold be expected to know that the product exists? That makes no sense! You believe you are so worldly wise that you know gays over 40 in Singapore must know about the product named FLIT? That is an example of your supreme arrogance! No doubt you believe Singaporeans and many Asians in general should know the products Tropical Sunrise and Moonlight Breeze.

 

Not ridiculous at all, unlike this criticism.  A tropical country like Singapore has mosquitoes.  And in the past there was no better defense against them than DDT.  This was the active ingredient in FLIT.  So they surely must have had something like this,  perhaps with another name, or written in Malay. 

[InBangkok]

On 5/26/2022 at 9:29 PM, Steve5380 said:

 

Not ridiculous at all, unlike this criticism.  A tropical country like Singapore has mosquitoes.  And in the past there was no better defense against them than DDT.  This was the active ingredient in FLIT.  So they surely must have had something like this,  perhaps with another name, or written in Malay. 

Another post clearly made in jest. How does @Steve5380 expect those living in a continent 16,000 kms from Houston, Texas and who do not have a clue what FLIT is to know that this unknown product contains DDT? That is just dumb! If he had mentioned DDT at the outset instead of assuming that Asian guys know what he knows, there would be no controversy. But as we have seen so often, he often expects readers merely to divine what is in his brain!