Jump to content
Male HQ

Is straight looking that important?


Guest Guest

Recommended Posts

Guest Guest

Someone in Grindr posted this

 

"I m str8 looking so m looking for someone who is str8 looking too. Not into those who 1 look can tell is gay.'

 

Seriously, really got straight looking gays meh? Just curious.

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Straight looking

No flamingoes.

No higher tone.

No feminine behavior.

Wear tees, bermudas and short slippers.

Face must be gong too type for Asian.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hmmm, I wonder whether a straight guy would feel ashamed if seen going out with his plump girlfriend? If a guy is seen walking with a feminate man, would people really bother to even think that the guy is gay? Nah, nobody will even bat an eyelid. Seriously, who has the trouble to even bother to think about that! But even if they do in a fleeting glance, why should it even matter?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 7/26/2022 at 6:48 PM, Guest Guest said:

Someone in Grindr posted this

 

"I m str8 looking so m looking for someone who is str8 looking too. Not into those who 1 look can tell is gay.'

 

Seriously, really got straight looking gays meh? Just curious.

 

Scared later people in public see him walking with a feminine guy mah. Or his neighbour saw a softie guy entering his house,they confirmed its a monkeypox maker how? That's why he wants to cover up.

Edited by cutejack
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I once chatted with a guy. Everything he talked about is finding someone who is straight acting.

 

Now it’s anyone’s prerogative to stick to his preferences, but when you make that such a big deal, it becomes very tiresome. It’s no fun hanging out with someone who is paranoid about being found out he is gay. 
 

Anyway there is no such thing as being straight acting. The moment you engage in homosexual behaviour, you are not straight acting. But yes you are pretending to be straight and you only deceive yourself. The whole world knows. Just that they can’t be bothered to expose you.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 7/26/2022 at 6:48 PM, Guest Guest said:

Someone in Grindr posted this

 

"I m str8 looking so m looking for someone who is str8 looking too. Not into those who 1 look can tell is gay.'

 

Seriously, really got straight looking gays meh? Just curious.

 

 

Straight looking or straight acting?

 

There might be a difference!

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 7/26/2022 at 6:48 PM, Guest Guest said:

Someone in Grindr posted this

 

"I m str8 looking so m looking for someone who is str8 looking too. Not into those who 1 look can tell is gay.'

 

Seriously, really got straight looking gays meh? Just curious.

 

 

But such search details are same idiotic as when you read:

 

"Looking for the same as me"

 

How would anyone know what would be "the same" and what it refers to!

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 7/26/2022 at 11:43 PM, Guest Straight looking said:

No flamingoes.

No higher tone.

No feminine behavior.

Wear tees, bermudas and short slippers.

Face must be gong too type for Asian.

 

Straight guys can have a higher toned voice also!

 

If you look at mannerisms in Singapore, straight guys here can have feminine behaviour also. 

 

I don't think all of them are gay....

 

Don't draw from such characteristics...

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Tinman

Straight looking is important to me cos I am not attracted to fem behaviour. But if the straight looking guy starts behaving like a female in bed when  I penetrate him, then it also won't work for me. I like my bottom to grunt and not moan like a JAV bitch in bed....

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Vanessa
On 7/26/2022 at 6:48 PM, Guest Guest said:

Someone in Grindr posted this

 

"I m str8 looking so m looking for someone who is str8 looking too. Not into those who 1 look can tell is gay.'

 

Seriously, really got straight looking gays meh? Just curious.

 

 

Why didnt you asked the person who posted , instead here ?? 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Yang is more prized over Ying.

鍾意就好,理佢男定女

 

never argue with the guests. let them bark all they want.

 

结缘不结

不解缘

 

After I have said what I wanna say, I don't care what you say.

 

看穿不说穿

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Guest
On 7/27/2022 at 10:24 AM, Guest Tinman said:

Straight looking is important to me cos I am not attracted to fem behaviour. But if the straight looking guy starts behaving like a female in bed when  I penetrate him, then it also won't work for me. I like my bottom to grunt and not moan like a JAV bitch in bed....

 

I'm like that also.

I cannot stand feminine behaviour in a gay guy.

If I was attracted to feminine behaviour, I'd be a straight guy.

Usually, feminine gay guys also have a lot of nonsense, drama and mood swings, exactly like a real girl.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Try and see
On 7/26/2022 at 6:48 PM, Guest Guest said:

Someone in Grindr posted this

 

"I m str8 looking so m looking for someone who is str8 looking too. Not into those who 1 look can tell is gay.'

 

Seriously, really got straight looking gays meh? Just curious.

 

 

I think when they say 'straight-looking', what they really mean is masculine/manly gay guys.

Not the stereotypical 'queens' who sway their hips a lot when they walk and talk and laugh in high-pitched voices.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Whywhy

Why some guys have a naturally born gay look even though their behavior is not feminine.

 

I'm talking about certain facial features. Hard to explain. Hope you know what I'm mean.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Try and see
On 7/27/2022 at 8:59 PM, Guest Whywhy said:

Why some guys have a naturally born gay look even though their behavior is not feminine.

 

I'm talking about certain facial features. Hard to explain. Hope you know what I'm mean.

 

Ya, some guys, even straight ones, got a very 'char bor face', while some women have very manly facial features.

Scientifically, it's probably caused by the level of hormones in the mother when the person was a fetus.

Metaphysically, it's likely something to do with the person's past life/lives i.e. a lot of people will carry physical traits of their past lives into their current life.

E.g. If you were shot in the chest in your past life and died from the wound, you would be reborn with a birthmark on your chest.

You will also physically resemble your past life persona, regardless of gender.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest A Victim
On 7/27/2022 at 8:59 PM, Guest Whywhy said:

Why some guys have a naturally born gay look even though their behavior is not feminine.

 

I'm talking about certain facial features. Hard to explain. Hope you know what I'm mean.

I believe some guys will have facial features that follow their mom side - feminine while others follow their dad's - masculine.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Oh my
On 7/27/2022 at 12:13 AM, doncoin said:

 

 

When I see a statement like that, it makes me realised how much shame the person who is seeking has with his own sexuality and he is projecting his shame and fear to the other person. To me, he is looking for a guy who will not expose his attraction to men instead of dealing with and accepting himself. 

 

So what if he finds a "straight looking" guy that can pass? It is not really going to change who the person seeking on Grindr is and his sexual orientation. Being with a "straight looking" guy is not going to make anyone less gay.

 

It's not about shame. It's the sexual attraction and what turns them on. Generally gay men get turned on by straight looking men. Women also get turned on by straight looking men, not men who look like woman. Not many people male or female will get turned on by men who look like women.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Guest
On 7/27/2022 at 11:12 PM, Guest Oh my said:

It's not about shame. It's the sexual attraction and what turns them on. Generally gay men get turned on by straight looking men. Women also get turned on by straight looking men, not men who look like woman. Not many people male or female will get turned on by men who look like women.

 

Well-said! 👏

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Nature is such that masculinity and femininity go together in harmony and balance. Even when 2 gay men come together, one exhibits more masculinity while the other exhibits more feminine qualities. The qualities may be fluid but as long as they are in harmony with one another, the relationship is in some sort of balance.

 

Guys who crave masculinity in other guys tend to be less assured of their own masculinity. They are less confident about themselves so they need some form of validation. This gives rise to muscle Marys who buff up to attract masculine guys but are really bottoms at heart.

 

Truly masculine guys are self assured of their own masculinity so they are not affected by how others think of them when they are seen with effeminate guys. In fact they are drawn to effeminate guys cos their masculinity is balanced by the femininity of other men. 
 

In any case I have found many straight looking guys to be not so straight acting mentally or psychologically. For example some straight looking guys may be indecisive or afraid to take responsibility or make a commitment. These are very guniang attitudes.

Edited by Startup
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Seeeme
On 7/28/2022 at 1:33 AM, doncoin said:

 

"Generally gay men get turned on by straight looking men... not men who look like woman."

 

I see all these male K-pop stars, i.e BTS, younger Chinese celebrities, etc., who wear makeup, and have coloured hair, etc. for the most part, their appearance are relatively feminine, yet they are mobbed by tons of female fans of various age groups, as well as male fans. So does this mean that these legions of fans are making a false attraction in their attraction to these K-pop idols etc. despite their softer appearance?

 

These K-pop idols are definitely not straight-looking by appearance, yet there are many who find them attractive. I hate to say this, when I think of the term, "straight looking" I think of the traditional ideal of masculinity, i.e. someone in a uniform like a policeman, construction worker, cowboy,  a Harley Davidson biker, etc. 

 

I think I just listed off most of the Village People. 

BTS  and feminine looking are popular with females because they are considered sexually safe. Just like females consider gays as sexually safe.

Otherwise others will wonder if these females are sexually stimulated by the kpop idols, which socially is cringe worthy.

 

The social medias also understood the underlying safety message and help to promote that these feminine boys are gayish and sexually safe to be worshipped by girls.

 

Unfortunately, that became main stream and people view gays as soft and feminine.

Whereas amongst gays, such feminine gays are not popular at all.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 7/28/2022 at 1:55 AM, Startup said:

Nature is such that masculinity and femininity go together in harmony and balance. Even when 2 gay men come together, one exhibits more masculinity while the other exhibits more feminine qualities. The qualities may be fluid but as long as they are in harmony with one another, the relationship is in some sort of balance.

 

Guys who crave masculinity in other guys tend to be less assured of their own masculinity. They are less confident about themselves so they need some form of validation. This gives rise to muscle Marys who buff up to attract masculine guys but are really bottoms at heart.

 

Truly masculine guys are self assured of their own masculinity so they are not affected by how others think of them when they are seen with effeminate guys. In fact they are drawn to effeminate guys cos their masculinity is balanced by the femininity of other men. 
 

In any case I have found many straight looking guys to be not so straight acting mentally or psychologically. For example some straight looking guys may be indecisive or afraid to take responsibility or make a commitment. These are very guniang attitudes.

 

Most masculine and feminine trends and attitudes are artificially defined and have no justifications.   In these times where gender equality is ever more wide,  we find traits that exist equally in men and women.  So many "macho" men are worthless, being lazy, lacking courage, discipline, etc.   And so many women have strong qualities associated with "strength".  

 

Does the importance of "straight-looking"  go beyond the importance of what the fuck others think of us?  This is so pitiful.  What matters for our partner is that WE like the way he looks. And that WE like the way he is.  

 

I personally don't care at all for masculinity.  I care for a good heart, a beauty that is not gender-defined, and a good character.   This is also what I have always tried to promote in myself, although not always successfully.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest wantamachoman

I am gay because I admire and love what is 'masculine' to me: strength of body, strength of mind and strength of character, with the protector and provider spirit. I seek to embody those qualities myself, but see that I need someone who is better than me to guide me in that way. 

 

Is this the typical 'daddy' preference?

But I don't want to be the 'girl' in the relationship: the soft, feminine one. I want to be just as masculine. 

That bucks the expectation in the heteronormative world where males seek the opposite of masculinity: softness and femininity. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 7/27/2022 at 12:13 AM, doncoin said:

 

 

When I see a statement like that, it makes me realised how much shame the person who is seeking has with his own sexuality and he is projecting his shame and fear to the other person. To me, he is looking for a guy who will not expose his attraction to men instead of dealing with and accepting himself. 

 

So what if he finds a "straight looking" guy that can pass? It is not really going to change who the person seeking on Grindr is and his sexual orientation. Being with a "straight looking" guy is not going to make anyone less gay.

 

Not true, its just that one is attracted the his own kind. Similarly, i am straight looking and wanna a straightlooking hookup or bf, right? That does not mean i am ashamed of feminine gays, juat happens not my dish. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Guest
On 7/27/2022 at 8:59 PM, Guest Whywhy said:

Why some guys have a naturally born gay look even though their behavior is not feminine.

 

I'm talking about certain facial features. Hard to explain. Hope you know what I'm mean.

Juz like wat above mention, "one look can tell is gay." 

To be frank, majority gay men haf a gay look.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Guest

"I m str8 looking so m looking for someone who is str8 looking too. Not into those who 1 look can tell is gay.'

 

This poster might think he is straight looking BUT he may not actually be. Our perception and interpretation of people are all different. LOL. He also mentions that he is after someone straight looking BUT what is straight looking actually? I might look at someone and clock him to be gay immediately while others might not.

 

Personally, I think this "straight looking" requirement is important to him because he is flying under the radar. Whatever the reason, it is sad if he has to hold himself in and consistently project a "straight" image to the world just because. Instead, he should revel in his true authentic life, one that he was born to be.

 

There is nothing wrong if you are a flaming Queen, have a gay look or it people can tell you are gay or not. Be PROUD of who you are, and live your true authentic life. That way, you will be a much happier person. AND, be kind to all!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 7/27/2022 at 12:13 AM, doncoin said:

 

 

When I see a statement like that, it makes me realised how much shame the person who is seeking has with his own sexuality and he is projecting his shame and fear to the other person. To me, he is looking for a guy who will not expose his attraction to men instead of dealing with and accepting himself. 

 

So what if he finds a "straight looking" guy that can pass? It is not really going to change who the person seeking on Grindr is and his sexual orientation. Being with a "straight looking" guy is not going to make anyone less gay.

 

I am in total agreement! in these times, what is 'straight looking', to death with the stereotypes, we are already marginalized, do we need to also qualify our existence in the gay community too!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Guest
On 7/29/2022 at 1:06 AM, Guest wantamachoman said:

I am gay because I admire and love what is 'masculine' to me: strength of body, strength of mind and strength of character, with the protector and provider spirit. I seek to embody those qualities myself, but see that I need someone who is better than me to guide me in that way. 

 

Is this the typical 'daddy' preference?

But I don't want to be the 'girl' in the relationship: the soft, feminine one. I want to be just as masculine. 

That bucks the expectation in the heteronormative world where males seek the opposite of masculinity: softness and femininity. 

 

I am exactly like that also. 

I'm a gay guy who appreciates masculinity in another guy, whether he is gay or straight.

If I was attracted to feminity, I would be a straight guy, in which case I would seek feminity in a girl, not in another guy.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 5 months later...
On 7/26/2022 at 8:23 PM, singalion said:

 

Straight looking or straight acting?

 

There might be a difference!

 

 

 

You have a good point.  The acting is much more relevant than the looking.  

 

I don't write from experience, but I think that everyone can learn with some practice to act straight or gay.  And even easier it should be with the look.  But it might require some coaching.   I would need some coaching to act and look gay,  but this had never occurred to me...

 

Has anyone here ever thought about making a business as a coach to help gays to act, look straight,  or to act, look gay?   This can be relevant only for those who CARE about their looks, acting, while those who don't care may enjoy a higher degree of freedom.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 7/26/2022 at 6:48 PM, Guest Guest said:

Someone in Grindr posted this

 

"I m str8 looking so m looking for someone who is str8 looking too. Not into those who 1 look can tell is gay.'

 

Seriously, really got straight looking gays meh? Just curious.

 

I suggest , your posting here , CUT And Paste  to the grinder user u claimed he wanted Str8 looking 

if he reply , share w us 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

That’s the reason I stopped using gay dating apps for the longest time. Hard to find nice people there or maybe my tolerance towards rudeness is very low. Sometimes people listed out high end criteria when looking for hookup or other half that they do not even possess. 
 

But hey, it’s the real world that we facing with and everyone have their preference, there is no need to shame another party if we are not what they looking for. Just move on and find someone who can accept for who you are; not someone that they expect you to be. 
 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Hiao Chee 冰冰
On 7/26/2022 at 6:48 PM, Guest Guest said:

Someone in Grindr posted this

 

"I m str8 looking so m looking for someone who is str8 looking too. Not into those who 1 look can tell is gay.'

 

Seriously, really got straight looking gays meh? Just curious.

 

Have.  Like I very Hiao Chee....people can tell and those interested will signal me to let them bang

Link to comment
Share on other sites

13 hours ago, Sizzler said:

Don't think so ... A guy can have his own preferences .. and there are a lot of "loud" effeminate guys that are a disgrace to be seen with in public. People look at them and think .. can't u behave yourself in public? 

 

 

Well, we cannot control what other people think. Toxic people will say all kinds of stuff, which may or may not be true, and there is nothing you can do about it. The loud effeminate guys are just being themselves and if you are embarrassed to be seen in public with them, avoid them. You don't have to be friends with them. 

 

Who are these people anyway? and why do their thoughts matter? 

 

 

Love. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 7/26/2022 at 6:48 PM, Guest Guest said:

Someone in Grindr posted this

 

"I m str8 looking so m looking for someone who is str8 looking too. Not into those who 1 look can tell is gay.'

 

Seriously, really got straight looking gays meh? Just curious.

 

 

In grindr, it's not exactly a platform where people put deep thoughts into what they write.  The profile is written probably based on instincts.  It's a bit like, "I prefer people who laugh."  If we analyse, then we ask, laugh at what, who, when..   So, probably the best way to react to a grindr profile is to use your instincts to gauge if the profile connects to you.   It's probably not for deep analysis :).  Just my thoughts, and happy grinding :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest SG manhunt

Have you seen those man hunt contestants for those "straight" beauty contest or whatever cleo or what... 

 

 

Some looks so gay acting. 

Some looks so straight. 

 

So yes there is definitely straight looking. 

Then you see those gay manhunt contestants and it's usually those more straight looking wins. 

 

If you see someone and can senses the gayness radiating out of him. Then that one is gay acting sia. 

 

If you see someone and can't tell he straight or gay but you wished he is gay... Then he is straight looking lo. 

 

I dunno why, for me, straight looking dude just looks more appealing.. 

 

Same thing when straight actor played the role of a gay character... It's so nice... As ckmpared to a gay actor playing a gay character (himself) in a movie.. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest No fem no Asian no chem
1 minute ago, Sizzler said:

Precisely my point .. there are guys who seek straight-acting guys only because they don't want to be seen with the loud effem guys. Nothing to do with the "shame" he has associated with his sexuality

 

I'm attracted to straight guy le. 

I'm not attracted to fem boy. 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

8 hours ago, Sizzler said:

I'm not suggesting you are (attracted to fem boy). Likewise, I am not attracted to them too.

 

My post is that people can have their own preferences. Advertising for "straight-acting" guys has nothing to do with "shame associated with one's sexuality". It could be a preference or simply because the advertiser does not want to associate himself with loud effem guys

 

Would you be friends with someone who is effeminate? 

Love. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Many gay guys, when standing in front of the mirror, saw a straight-acting guy.  The amusing part is, all his surrounding people could see is an effeminate gay guy. 
 

Years back when I was still seeking a date, before meeting, many guys will specifically tell me (without asking) that they are straight-acting & nobody could tell that they are gays. When I finally met each of them, from afar among the crowd, I could tell who is auntie Gucci! 🤣

 

I have nothing against effeminate guys. But I find guys who are in denial are crazy 

Edited by robin
Link to comment
Share on other sites

14 hours ago, Sizzler said:

If he is one of those loud sissies, the answer is an emphatic No .. NOT because I am ashamed of my sexuality but because their behavior in public is embarrassing

 

You just pointed out that you feel embarrassed by their behaviour in public. Why do you feel that way? 

 

How has the behaviour of "loud sissies" affected you when you are not even friends with any of them? 

 

Love. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

17 hours ago, robin said:

Many gay guys, when standing in front of the mirror, saw a straight-acting guy.  The amusing part is, all his surrounding people could see is an effeminate gay guy. 
 

Years back when I was still seeking a date, before meeting, many guys will specifically tell me (without asking) that they are straight-acting & nobody could tell that they are gays. When I finally met each of them, from afar among the crowd, I could tell who is auntie Gucci! 🤣

 

I have nothing against effeminate guys. But I find guys who are in denial are crazy 

 

they are not in denial...they are what i call 'scammers'...they say they masculine in behavior n looks but the exact opposite when u meet them...these 'scammers' are not popular even in the gay community becoz they're neither here nor there...ambiguous look with ambiguous fashion sense with ambiguous behaviour...so

confusing...n when u reject them, they will put on 'Rupauls Drag Queen Race' behaviour...they will try to 'out' u to ur own family...they're what i call 'sour grapes'...i dun have anything against the 'neither here nor there' kind but they often remind me of the movie 'Mean Girls' starring Lindsay Lohan...perhaps their pent-up frustration being undesirable even among the majority of the gay community that made them to resort to these desperate tactics...btw, there are also those who claim they are 'TOPS'...wow, even more confusing...but no thank u...LOL

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...