Share your emotions and behavior manifestation by Stress causing extreme emotional swings

[NeitherHereNorThere]

Pretty stress out by work recently, and having quite "interesting" and drastic mood swings between super horny and super grumpy.

 

For the horny part, I'm surfing BW, sneaking out for hook ups etc during office hours, am alluding this behaviour to get the mind away from work, an as a form of protest.

 

Being grumpy I guess is normal, trying to make a statement. Though not good, but negativity is eating me and manifesting in this grumpy form..

 

Penning this down for those same fated an avenue to vent and share your emotions and behavior manifestation.

[ShyAndUnsure]

One thing that can help is to do conscious deep breathing at various times throughout the day. E.g. perhaps take a minute off at the start of each hour. Take a slow controlled inhale and fill the sensation spread through the body, then breathe out slowly and let the tension flow out. Repeat it 3-4 times; will take no more than 2 minutes each session, but will help to reset your mood and stress level.

[Sweetie Pie]

52 minutes ago, NeitherHereNorThere said:

Pretty stress out by work recently, and having quite "interesting" and drastic mood swings between super horny and super grumpy.

 

For the horny part, I'm surfing BW, sneaking out for hook ups etc during office hours, am alluding this behaviour to get the mind away from work, an as a form of protest.

 

Being grumpy I guess is normal, trying to make a statement. Though not good, but negativity is eating me and manifesting in this grumpy form..

 

Penning this down for those same fated an avenue to vent and share your emotions and behavior manifestation.

It usually affects young minds and those who haven't yet developed a feeling of self-worth or independence from their private lives, which shows devoid of privacy or a place to call home, resulted in temperamental mood swing, urge to find some form of peace deal such as sex or otherwsie. thinking and dreaming as days passes into months, and then years.  Such journey is terrible, non purposeful, empty and to a point you scream your lung out and decided to stop and start seriously thinking about the future.

[GachiMuchi]

2 hours ago, NeitherHereNorThere said:

Pretty stress out by work recently, and having quite "interesting" and drastic mood swings between super horny and super grumpy.

 

For the horny part, I'm surfing BW, sneaking out for hook ups etc during office hours, am alluding this behaviour to get the mind away from work, an as a form of protest.

 

Being grumpy I guess is normal, trying to make a statement. Though not good, but negativity is eating me and manifesting in this grumpy form..

 

Penning this down for those same fated an avenue to vent and share your emotions and behavior manifestation.

 

Most likely andropause for the grumpy part (click for symptoms) 

 

Another could be psychological. You stress in work caused you to subconsciously want to get of the company, but because you cannot leave your job. It manifested itself and made behave you like a serial sex offender waiting to get caught.

 

"As a form of protest" or waiting to get caught and potentially leading to losing your job? That is a dark path with no good end for you. Either losing job or getting caught and getting into unnecessary trouble.

 

Maybe can study the possibility of getting a new job and change the environment. 

Edited April 26, 2023 by GachiMuchi

[NeitherHereNorThere]

30 minutes ago, Guest 溶冰冰 said:

 

Usually on Uncke age group people become grumpy old man who behave like male Karens , insisting the sun revolves around said Karen uncle, grumpy, loud mouths, impatient, stubborn and lost all sense of public shame , will bully women , teens , younger men and challenge to fight  

 

Usually , sits at kopitiam nursing a cild beer and with white tennis shorts and low hanging balls may do a peekaboo.

 

Are you said type of UNCLE KAREN ??

That's not grumpy, that's grouchy 🤣🤣

 

No.. I'm not there yet.

[NeitherHereNorThere]

17 minutes ago, GachiMuchi said:

 

Most likely andropause for the grumpy part (click for symptoms) 

 

Another could be psychological. You stress in work caused you to subconsciously want to get of the company, but because you cannot leave your job. It manifested itself and made behave you like a serial sex offender waiting to get caught.

 

"As a form of protest" or waiting to get caught and potentially leading to losing your job? That is a dark path with no good end for you. Either losing job or getting caught and getting into unnecessary trouble.

 

Maybe can study the possibility of getting a new job and change the environment. 

Potentially..

 

Without going into details... Revolves around office politics, roti pratas, misplaced of trust. I'm generally positive and outcome driven, but the prata-ing and other stuff are eroding these away with me trying to guess what's on their agenda, and how to guard.

 

好累哦

[NeitherHereNorThere]

And no, not the first time I'm dealing with such "common" corporate issues.. but... I guess age caught up and maybe I just want a peaceful life.

 

So, mind fighting to come to terms with how things turn out

[GachiMuchi]

1 hour ago, NeitherHereNorThere said:

Potentially..

 

Without going into details... Revolves around office politics, roti pratas, misplaced of trust. I'm generally positive and outcome driven, but the prata-ing and other stuff are eroding these away with me trying to guess what's on their agenda, and how to guard.

 

好累哦

 

1 hour ago, NeitherHereNorThere said:

And no, not the first time I'm dealing with such "common" corporate issues.. but... I guess age caught up and maybe I just want a peaceful life.

 

So, mind fighting to come to terms with how things turn out

 

Toxic environment is not a place to stay long, but that is corporate life. You get paid high salary for a reason. So, might want to look into possibility of changing your job but maybe lower pay?

[ShyAndUnsure]

Agree with @GachiMuchipost. I think, in the long run, if you feel like the environment is too toxic, the best is to move elsewhere. But you have to do the calculus on your own to see if it is worth the trouble, bearing in mind that bad work culture may be reflective of an industry rather than your company being a unique case. 

 

I would suggest that a short term solution for you would be to learn to separate your identity/person from your work. By that, I mean just let the work issues be just that - work. Tune out the second you shut down your computer. Protect personal time. Find activities, connect with friends and family outside of work. And when the work day begins again the next day, put on the work mask and persona and get through the day. Let the pain, suffering and annoyances just pass through you without affecting you - think of it as an invisible knife that passes through you. You can't stop it, but you can choose how to react to that knife. Just let it pass you and don't dwell on it. Be aware of the knife, but don't let it materialize or actually remain in you or cause you long term harm. Let it pass. Before you know, work day has ended. And you again get to live your real life. 😊

[doncoin]

If you have an iPhone, you can create a group on your contacts, say people from work, and set rules around those people. For example, silence all calls from them after 7pm. 

 

https://support.apple.com/guide/mac-help/set-up-screen-time-for-yourself-mchle4e2edfe/13.0/mac/13.0

[Steve5380]

12 hours ago, NeitherHereNorThere said:

Potentially..

 

Without going into details... Revolves around office politics, roti pratas, misplaced of trust. I'm generally positive and outcome driven, but the prata-ing and other stuff are eroding these away with me trying to guess what's on their agenda, and how to guard.

 

好累哦

 

Maybe more than "potentially". If  @GachiMuchi is right that it may be andropause because age caught up,  this can be helpful.   Why not acknowledge a decrease in sexual urges and try to find pleasure, satisfaction by other means?   Sooner or later if you live to 100 y.o.  this will happen,  and you can see many old seniors that live happily.  For example find an intellectual hobby you can entertain even during office hours without being perceived.

 

About the poisonous ugly environment that is typical of work places where you need to be to earn a living,  one solution is to seek PROTECTION, IMMUNITY from the evils at such places.  No one can look into your brain and know what you think.  This is YOUR privacy.  Even without being a psychologist you can research and find techniques that make your spirit immune to these poisons.  Meditation, detachment, acting skills to hide such detachment, pleasant off-work activities you can concentrate on your rich mind to disconnect from office irritations and cultivate a calm mind even in the middle of the turmoil of office politics. 

[NeitherHereNorThere]

Thanks for all the support and suggestions.

 

I'm trying to give time for things to settle first, as it could be just me "over reacting" to certain turn of events which I wasn't prepared for. It could be otherwise.

 

To @Steve5380's point, the andropause that @GachiMuchi refers to is the grumpy part. I'm actually more horny during this period, but it could also be a manifestation of retaliation since I sneaked out during office hours. But the part about protecting my mind is true, and @ShyAndUnsure's suggestion of separating identity and work is something that I should learn..

🙏

[IkuTube]

I read this thread with interest, with a reflection where many of us can experience it one way or another.  It can happen to me, to you and to many of us.  It is, indeed, one of life's natural crisis.

The first thing that came into mind, as I do my reflection reading it, is connecting to the phrase where I have constantly reminded myself.  It reads "When a man finds no peace within himself, it is useless to look for it elsewhere".  While I strongly agree with this proverb, it is another milestone to embrace and achieve it.

Peace, as is, is something many of us are struggling (in life) to achieve.  It is a fleeting feeling.  We may say 'I am at peace' now and the peace vaporizes as quickly as we take another breath.  Bottom line, as humans, at the core of our fickle mindedness, lies a lack of love for oneself.

Often it is said that when there is love, nothing is too much trouble and there shall always be time.  Love fills the void and when the void is filled, the feeling of inner emptiness minimises extreme emotional swings.  It is the lack of love for oneself that is causing us to fill that emptiness by doing something else that may not be what we truly want or desire.  Unconsciously, we are running away from that inner emptiness and abandoning self love.

Mindfulness is important.  To accept there is an empty void within us is crucial towards making things right moving forward.  It is the energy, the super power, that keeps the mind sane, that integrates the feeling of peace within us. 

Through mindfulness, it leads our fickle mind to think twice to discover and it reveals whatever we may seek to accomplish in life.  While it may not truly provide the ultimate bliss, it is another form of peace, joy and happiness.

Truly loving oneself is one of the most difficult thing a person can do.  But, we need to commit to ourselves no matter what.  However, it is a thin line between self love and being in a state of narcissism.

Life requires us to constantly move in order to grow.  It is the choice that we make that sets the difference.  It shall be the act of self love that brings happiness, joy and peace.  It is self love that brings the feeling of self worth that makes life felt fulfilled.

The feeling of extreme emotional swings will slowly fade as we start to replace it with love.  When there is love, peace is felt and life becomes beautiful naturally.

Feeling stress that is causing us to react with extreme emotional swings can be avoided when we learn to love ourselves to make our hearts (and minds) happy.  Self love, through mindfulness, lifts the spirit.  It makes us to understand our needs and wants better.

 

To @NeitherHereNorThere, thank you for sharing your experience.  Your post makes me not to take mindfulness for granted.

 

 

 

[mate69]

Stress brought about by extreme heat, humidity and overcrowdedness everywhere.

Exacerbating my extreme moodyness and swings in temperament, leading to outbursts (at often the weather)

 

[NeitherHereNorThere]

On 4/28/2023 at 6:16 PM, IkuTube said:

I read this thread with interest, with a reflection where many of us can experience it one way or another.  It can happen to me, to you and to many of us.  It is, indeed, one of life's natural crisis.

The first thing that came into mind, as I do my reflection reading it, is connecting to the phrase where I have constantly reminded myself.  It reads "When a man finds no peace within himself, it is useless to look for it elsewhere".  While I strongly agree with this proverb, it is another milestone to embrace and achieve it.

Peace, as is, is something many of us are struggling (in life) to achieve.  It is a fleeting feeling.  We may say 'I am at peace' now and the peace vaporizes as quickly as we take another breath.  Bottom line, as humans, at the core of our fickle mindedness, lies a lack of love for oneself.

Often it is said that when there is love, nothing is too much trouble and there shall always be time.  Love fills the void and when the void is filled, the feeling of inner emptiness minimises extreme emotional swings.  It is the lack of love for oneself that is causing us to fill that emptiness by doing something else that may not be what we truly want or desire.  Unconsciously, we are running away from that inner emptiness and abandoning self love.

Mindfulness is important.  To accept there is an empty void within us is crucial towards making things right moving forward.  It is the energy, the super power, that keeps the mind sane, that integrates the feeling of peace within us. 

Through mindfulness, it leads our fickle mind to think twice to discover and it reveals whatever we may seek to accomplish in life.  While it may not truly provide the ultimate bliss, it is another form of peace, joy and happiness.

Truly loving oneself is one of the most difficult thing a person can do.  But, we need to commit to ourselves no matter what.  However, it is a thin line between self love and being in a state of narcissism.

Life requires us to constantly move in order to grow.  It is the choice that we make that sets the difference.  It shall be the act of self love that brings happiness, joy and peace.  It is self love that brings the feeling of self worth that makes life felt fulfilled.

The feeling of extreme emotional swings will slowly fade as we start to replace it with love.  When there is love, peace is felt and life becomes beautiful naturally.

Feeling stress that is causing us to react with extreme emotional swings can be avoided when we learn to love ourselves to make our hearts (and minds) happy.  Self love, through mindfulness, lifts the spirit.  It makes us to understand our needs and wants better.

 

To @NeitherHereNorThere, thank you for sharing your experience.  Your post makes me not to take mindfulness for granted.

 

 

 

I'm glad it helped, and thanks for sharing your thoughts. Indeed, need to self love more, also happy to say that I'm at peace at of now. When's the next episode, I don't know, but better to live in the present than worry about the future.

[NeitherHereNorThere]

Been triggered again.

 

I realised that my negativity had not gone away, even if I psycho myself to move on, and focus on work etc. When I get triggered, the anger, frustratio feel like that have always been around, just waiting for the time to explode.

 

Short night text to the boss, became a long chat on Whatsapp. Arranged for a f2f with him, but not sure I can control my emotions enof to be coherent. I'm at the brink, and the negativity is eating me alive. Am throwing cautious to the wind, be myself, state what I deem is right and hold on to that. If it doesn't resonate, then it's goodbye time.

[Steve5380]

On 4/28/2023 at 5:16 AM, IkuTube said:

Mindfulness is important.  To accept there is an empty void within us is crucial towards making things right moving forward.  It is the energy, the super power, that keeps the mind sane, that integrates the feeling of peace within us. 

Through mindfulness, it leads our fickle mind to think twice to discover and it reveals whatever we may seek to accomplish in life.  While it may not truly provide the ultimate bliss, it is another form of peace, joy and happiness.

 

 

One good exercise of mindfulness is meditation.  It can become a positive habit that does not need to take much time.   And about how to do it,  YouTube is full of suggestions.

[Steve5380]

1 hour ago, NeitherHereNorThere said:

Been triggered again.

 

I realised that my negativity had not gone away, even if I psycho myself to move on, and focus on work etc. When I get triggered, the anger, frustratio feel like that have always been around, just waiting for the time to explode.

 

Short night text to the boss, became a long chat on Whatsapp. Arranged for a f2f with him, but not sure I can control my emotions enof to be coherent. I'm at the brink, and the negativity is eating me alive. Am throwing cautious to the wind, be myself, state what I deem is right and hold on to that. If it doesn't resonate, then it's goodbye time.

 

Any personal change takes time.   It takes weeks for us to develop a new habit.  But there is always a beginning, worth pursuing.  

 

Think about when it is a good "goodbye time".  If there is no special urgency, it can be always done. It may be best to wait for a time when there is no explosive anger, frustration.  Sometimes it is best to keep the mouth closed and the ears open, and breathe exclusively through the nose.  This is also the healthiest. 

[IkuTube]

7 hours ago, NeitherHereNorThere said:

Been triggered again.

 

I realised that my negativity had not gone away, even if I psycho myself to move on, and focus on work etc. When I get triggered, the anger, frustratio feel like that have always been around, just waiting for the time to explode.

 

Short night text to the boss, became a long chat on Whatsapp. Arranged for a f2f with him, but not sure I can control my emotions enof to be coherent. I'm at the brink, and the negativity is eating me alive. Am throwing cautious to the wind, be myself, state what I deem is right and hold on to that. If it doesn't resonate, then it's goodbye time.

 

The good thing, you are able to realize how you think.  This is the first step towards awareness.  With awareness, you will be able to control your next reactions.

 

In any therapy, one is taught to SIT when he/she is experiencing a change in mood.  It is a basic technique on the actions to Sit, Inhale and Think.   Deep breathing exercise, hold to the count of 10 and exhale slowly (again, to the count of 10) can help too.  The more these exercises are done, very likely you will feel a sense of calmness to take place over your BEing.

 

Change takes time but with awareness (and deep realization), the paradigm shift works faster.

 

 

[Guest Only robots remain calm]

31 minutes ago, IkuTube said:

 

The good thing, you are able to realize how you think.  This is the first step towards awareness.  With awareness, you will be able to control your next reactions.

 

In any therapy, one is taught to SIT when he/she is experiencing a change in mood.  It is a basic technique on the actions to Sit, Inhale and Think.   Deep breathing exercise, hold to the count of 10 and exhale slowly (again, to the count of 10) can help too.  The more these exercises are done, very likely you will feel a sense of calmness to take place over your BEing.

 

Change takes time but with awareness (and deep realization), the paradigm shift works faster.

 

 

 

Don't listen to this guy. We live in a society where the pervasive messaging in tik tok, Instagram etc is to be calm etc. 

 

You are entitled to your emotion!! If you felt angry because someone mistreated you. It's natural!!!! 

 

Its unnatural to train yourself to sit, inhale and think.... While someone abuse you or mistreat you? 

 

Do you sit, inhale and think while someone rape you? Do you sit, inhale and think while someone verbally abuse you? Do you sit, inhale and think while someone violate your basic right? 

 

No. 

 

So don't let them. React. Act. Respond. With vengeance!!! 

[NeitherHereNorThere]

Thanks all for the advise and comforting message. So warm to receive messages of support, an a big shout out to @Mister M @agog and @discreeetguy for the private messages, even though I've only been to some of you once.. Missed your massages! Will come visiting once this crisis is over

[NeitherHereNorThere]

After such a long time, finally putting a closure to my current work.

 

I always thought that we had lots of issues internally, external ones are managable.. Seems that the combi of both is deadly, resulting in a total change to mgmt, citing drastic actions needed to course correct. As much as the internal problems would, IMO, be resolved in due time, this abrupt change came too fast and too sudden.

 

Have lost faith with the leadership and decided to move on. Hopefully new work, new challenges will bring about positive changes, but not resulting in me losing horniness! (highly doubt so from my posts so far!)

[auscent]

Like me, I too have sharp anger directed to management. I channeled a lot of the negative chi towards exercise, starting new work projects and of course, sex.

 

Important is to manage, not prevent, it from being too destructive.