worldangel Posted March 28, 2023 Report Share Posted March 28, 2023 Joke: Your Best Friends Every weekend before she went out on a date, the young girl was told by her mother, “Remember, dear, when he tries to touch you a certain way, a girl’s best friends are her legs.” Much to her mother’s dismay, however, several weeks later her daughter announced that she was pregnant. “What! How did it happen? Didn’t I tell you that your best friends are your legs?” “You did, Mama,” she replied. “But there comes a time when even best friends must part.” SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted March 29, 2023 Report Share Posted March 29, 2023 Joke: When the Rooster Stops Chasing A farmer was munching on a cookie as he watches the rooster chase a hen around. Playfully, the farmer threw a piece of cookie to the ground. Seeing it, the rooster stopped chasing the hen and ran to the piece of cookie. The farmer shook his head slowly and said, “Gosh, I hope I never get that hungry.” SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted March 29, 2023 Report Share Posted March 29, 2023 Joke: Spider With No Legs A blonde decides to make an experiment. She gets a spider and pulls off two legs and tells it to walk. It walks a few steps, so she removes another two legs and asks it to walk. It walks a few more steps, so she yanks off another two legs and tells it to walk. It walks, so she removes the last two legs and tells it to walk. Nothing happens, so she asks it again to walk. It doesn't move so she comes up with a conclusion. She concludes that spiders with no legs are deaf. SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted March 29, 2023 Report Share Posted March 29, 2023 Joke: Did You Pose for That? A man sees a picture of his wife in the nude hanging at an art show and demands of her, "Did you really pose for that?" "Don’t be ridiculous," she replies. "Of course not. The artist painted it from memory." SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted March 29, 2023 Report Share Posted March 29, 2023 Joke: Big Game Hunting A big game hunter goes on safari with his wife and his mother-in-law. One morning, the wife wakes up to find her mother gone. Immediately, she awakens up her husband and they both set off to find the older woman. Suddenly, they break into a clearing and there's the mother-in-law, standing face-to-face with a ferocious lion! "Quick, darling," the wife shouts frantically, "Do something!" "Oh, no," the husband says, "That lion got himself into this mess. Let him get himself out!" SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 1, 2023 Report Share Posted April 1, 2023 Joke: Hate My Mother-In-Law Cannibal #1: "I hate my mother-in-law." Cannibal #2: "Well, then just eat the noodles." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 1, 2023 Report Share Posted April 1, 2023 Joke: Like A Tropical Hurricane Why are women similar to a tropical hurricane ? When they arrive they're wet and warm, when they leave they take your house and car. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 1, 2023 Report Share Posted April 1, 2023 Joke: Sex with Our Eyes A young girl is feeling under the weather, so she goes to the family doctor. “Young lady,” says the doctor, “you’re pregnant.” “But that can’t be. The only men I’ve been with are nudists, and in our colony we practice sex only with our eyes.” “Well, my dear,” said the physician, “someone in that colony is cock-eyed.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 1, 2023 Report Share Posted April 1, 2023 Joke: You Need More Tail A husband in his back yard is trying to fly a kite. He throws the kite up in the air, the wind catches it for a few seconds, and then it comes crashing back down to earth. He tries a few more times with no success. All the while, his wife is watching from the kitchen window, muttering to herself how men need to be told how to do everything. She opens the window and yells to her husband, “You need more tail!” The man turns with a confused look on his face and says, "Make up your mind. Last night, you told me to go fly a kite!” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 2, 2023 Report Share Posted April 2, 2023 Joke: Beer Nuts and Deer Nuts What is the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? Beer nuts are $5 and deer nuts are always under a buck!!! SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 2, 2023 Report Share Posted April 2, 2023 oke: Paint Us Making Love Joan says to her husband, “I’d like my cousin Joe to visit one weekend and paint a picture of us making love. He is an artist, you know." Her husband replies, “Oh, he paints still life does he?” yhtang 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 2, 2023 Report Share Posted April 2, 2023 Joke: Bigger Than His A man is walking and sees a sign that says: "MAKE MY DONKEY LAUGH AND WIN $200!" The man thought, what the hell. He goes up to the man at the booth and asks, "How much?" The man at the booth replies, "Fifty dollars, please." He gives the $50. The man went around the wall to the donkey, whispered something into it's ear. The donkey laughed hard and laughed loud. The man had got his $200 and was on his way. The next month he was walking the same rout again, and he sees a sign that says: "MAKE MY DONKEY CRY AND WIN $200." So he walks up to the booth and again, pays the $50. He goes around the wall to the donkey and whispers something in its ear. When he comes around the donkey is balling his eyes out crying. Then the man at the booth says, " How did you make him laugh and cry?" "Well, when I made him laugh I said my penis was bigger than his. Then to make him cry, I showed him." SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 2, 2023 Report Share Posted April 2, 2023 Joke: Sex For $200 One day at a zoo, they found a female gorilla was in heat. Knowing that they did not have a male gorilla around they decided to ask a groundskeeper if he would have sex with the female gorilla for $200 dollars. Let me think it over said the man. A couple of days later they approached the groundskeeper and asked him if he had decided one way or the other. He replied, “I am having a very tough time raising the $200 dollars." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 8, 2023 Report Share Posted April 8, 2023 Joke: It Wasn't the Apple Contrary to popular belief, it wasn’t the apple on the tree that got us banished from Paradise. It was the pair on the ground! Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 8, 2023 Report Share Posted April 8, 2023 Joke: Just Admit It Already A little boy just would not learn. One day his history teacher asked him who signed the Declaration of Independence. He didn't know. For almost a week she never stopped asking him the same question, but still he couldn't come up with the right answer. Finally, in desperation, the teacher called the boy's father and complained. "Your boy won't tell me who signed the Declaration of Independence.” he father call his son and said, "Come here, son, and sit down. Now, if you signed that goddamn thing, just admit it so we can get out of here!!!" SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 8, 2023 Report Share Posted April 8, 2023 Joke: Standing Straight Up Two women are fishing. Lisa always catches the most fish. Wanda asked her, "How do you do it? Every time we go fishing you always catch the most fish." Lisa replied, "When I wake up in the morning, if my husband's thing is hanging off to the left, I fish off the left side of the boat. If his thing is hanging off to the right, I fish off the right side of the boat." Wanda says, "What if his thing is standing straight up?” Lisa replies, "Then you don't go fishing!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 8, 2023 Report Share Posted April 8, 2023 Joke: If He Can Screw One night, an 87-year-old woman came home from bingo to find her 92-year-old husband in bed with another woman. She became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th-floor apartment, killing him instantly. Brought before the court on the charge of murder, she was asked if she had anything to say in her own defence. "Your Honour," she began cooly, "I figured that at 92, if he could screw, he could fly!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 9, 2023 Report Share Posted April 9, 2023 Joke: What Did She Roll? Two bored casino dealers were waiting at a craps table. A very attractive blonde lady arrived and bet twenty thousand dollars on a single roll of the dice. She said, " I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm nude." With that she stripped from her neck down, rolled the dice and yelled, "Mama needs new clothes!" Then she hollered..."YES! YES! I WON! I WON!" She jumped up and down and hugged each of the dealers. With that she picked up all the money and clothes and quickly departed. The dealers just stared at each other dumbfounded. Finally, one of them asked, "What did she roll?" The other answered, "I thought YOU were watching!" SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 9, 2023 Report Share Posted April 9, 2023 Joke: Man's Perfect Breakfast What's the definition of a man's perfect breakfast? His son is on the cover of the Wheaties box, his mistress is on the cover of Playboy, and his wife is on the back of the milk carton. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 9, 2023 Report Share Posted April 9, 2023 Joke: My Wife Is Unfaithful A man goes to a shrink and says, “Doctor, my wife is unfaithful to me. Every evening, she goes to Larry’s bar and picks up men. In fact, she sleeps with anybody who asks her! I’m going crazy. What do you think I should do?” “Relax,” says the shrink. “Take a deep breath and calm down. Now, tell me, exactly where is Larry’s bar?” SAKnight93 and yhtang 1 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 9, 2023 Report Share Posted April 9, 2023 Joke: My Sex Life Is A Holiday Benny was talking to his best friend Sam. "Don't tell anyone, Sam, but my Sadie once again had a headache last night." "Really?" said Sam. "Yes," replied Benny, "it's been like this for some weeks now. I've been thinking that they must have named a Jewish holiday after my sex life." "Which one?" Sam asked. "Passover,” replied Benny. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 12, 2023 Report Share Posted April 12, 2023 Joke: New Resolution What is your resolution going to be for the new year? Still on 1080p? Or upgraded to 4k already? SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 12, 2023 Report Share Posted April 12, 2023 Joke: Is Smoking Good or Bad The discussion goes on and on as to if smoking is good or bad for you. But how can they question that when it cures salmon? SAKnight93, Rolling_Hafi and yhtang 1 2 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 12, 2023 Report Share Posted April 12, 2023 Joke: He Sounds Like A Keeper A woman posts her profile on a dating app. Two days later, she gets a message back, saying, "I would love to meet you, but I need to tell you that I am eight feet tall, covered in long, mangy fur riddled with fleas, and have glowing yellow eyes, razor sharp claws and long, drooly fangs. If you are still interested in meeting me, I'll be sitting on a bench in Central Park at five o'clock this afternoon." The woman replies, "I would love to meet you, but could you please wear a red rose and some French cologne so I can recognize you?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 12, 2023 Report Share Posted April 12, 2023 Joke: Retirement Party The boss is finally old enough to retire from the company. On his last day of work, he ordered a farewell party for himself. The boss wanted everyone to express their good feeling about him by writing on the farewell card, so later he could remember how his staff would "miss" him. Most people are writing standard phrases like, Without you, the company will never be the same... We will always remember you... etc. Obviously the boss was not satisfied. "I need something from the bottom of your heart, something really touching, you know. Okay, John, you have been working with me for the last 20 years. You are my best staff. I am retiring now. What do you have to say?" Slowly but firmly, John wrote, "The best news in 20 years!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 14, 2023 Report Share Posted April 14, 2023 Joke: Temporary Tattoo Yesterday I went to a temporary tattoo parlour to get a tattoo. After it wouldn’t wash off this morning I went back to complain, but the tattoo parlour wasn’t there. SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 14, 2023 Report Share Posted April 14, 2023 Joke: The Batmobile Robin: “The Batmobile isn’t starting!” Batman: “Did you charge the battery?” Robin: “What the hell is a tery?” SAKnight93 and yhtang 2 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 14, 2023 Report Share Posted April 14, 2023 Joke: French Fries Did you know that french fries weren’t first cooked in France? They’re actually cooked in Greece. SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 14, 2023 Report Share Posted April 14, 2023 Joke: New Dog Food We put our dog on a vegan diet, and she's doing really well... She's eaten two so far SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 14, 2023 Report Share Posted April 14, 2023 Joke: Worth Its Weight in Gold... Fish For his birthday, Little Johnny's parents gave him a bowl of goldfish. His mother carefully explains to him how much responsibility comes with owning a pet and tells him to make sure he remembers to give the fish the care they need every day. Johnny is responsible with the fish for about one week, after which he begins forgetting to look after them, leaving his parents to feed the fish and clean the tank. After a couple of days, Johnny's mom and dad bring the issue up to him. "Now Johnny," says his mother. "You have to be more responsible." "Do you know how many times those fish would have died if we hadn't been there?" his father adds. "Uhm, I don't know," Johnny replies. "Once?" SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 15, 2023 Report Share Posted April 15, 2023 Joke: Riding Sky High Life is like a helicopter. I don't know how to operate a helicopter. SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 15, 2023 Report Share Posted April 15, 2023 Joke: Christmas Present Why was E the only letter in the alphabet to get a Christmas present? Because the rest of the letters were not-E. SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 15, 2023 Report Share Posted April 15, 2023 Joke: Money To Charity \ Fred collected lots of money from trick-or-treating and he went to the candy store to buy some chocolate. "You should give that money to charity," said the sales girl. Fred thought for a moment and said, "No, I'll buy the chocolate. You give the money to charity." SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 15, 2023 Report Share Posted April 15, 2023 Joke: First Time Skydiving A man went skydiving for the first time. "It's easy," said the instructor. "Just count to five and pull on the main chute," the instructor continued. "If that doesn't open, count to ten and pull on the reserve chute." "Super easy," he concluded. "Then you'll float slowly to the ground, and our bus will be there to drive you back to the airport." The man jumped out the plane, and pulled on the main chute. Nothing happened. He pulled on the reserve chute. Nothing happened. He looked down at the ground which was approaching fast, and said: "I bet that bus won't be there to pick me up either." SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 18, 2023 Report Share Posted April 18, 2023 Joke: Blame It On the Golf Caddie Golfer: "You've got to be the worst caddy in the world!" Caddy: "I don't think so, sir, that would be too much of a coincidence!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 18, 2023 Report Share Posted April 18, 2023 Joke: She Told Me To Leave My wife packed my bags and told me to leave. As I was headed out the door, she said, "I hope you live a long and lonely life!” I replied, "So now you want me to stay?" SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 18, 2023 Report Share Posted April 18, 2023 Joke: Bitten By A Wolf An emergency call: "Come quick, my friend was bitten by a wolf!" Operator: "Where?" Caller: "No, a regular one!" SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 18, 2023 Report Share Posted April 18, 2023 Joke: Far, Far Away My family likes to sing carols during the holidays. Alas, I have a cold this year, so when I offered to lead one of the carols, my cousin suggested that I sing away in a manger... Far, far away, in a manger. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 21, 2023 Report Share Posted April 21, 2023 Joke: Salt Water Gargle "Trouble with your throat, eh... ever gargle with salt water?" "Yes, sort of. I nearly drowned while swimming last summer." SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 21, 2023 Report Share Posted April 21, 2023 Joke: Coin Toss Test A statistics major was completely hung over the day of his final exam. It was a True/False test, so he decided to flip a coin for the answers. The stats professor watched the student the entire two hours as he was flipping the coin... writing the answer... flipping the coin... writing the answer. At the end of the two hours, everyone else had left the final except for the one student. The professor walks up to his desk and interrupts the student, saying: "Listen, I have seen that you did not study for this statistics test, you didn't even open the exam. If you are just flipping a coin for your answer, what is taking you so long?" The student replies bitterly, as he is still flipping the coin: "Shhh! I am checking my answers!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 21, 2023 Report Share Posted April 21, 2023 Joke: Inside Joke My mate recently got divorced from his wife. They decided to split the house. He got the outside. SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 21, 2023 Report Share Posted April 21, 2023 Joke: Falling For It While fixing his roof, a man fell off of the ladder. After meeting with his wife later, he told her that four ribs were broken. "Four ribs broken?!" she gasps. "Which hospital did you go to?" "I didn't have to go to the hospital." he replies. His wife stares in perplexity. "Four broken ribs and you didn't have to go to the hospital?" "No, it was the fella I landed on who broke four ribs." SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 22, 2023 Report Share Posted April 22, 2023 Joke: The Meanest Reindeer Who is the meanest reindeer in Santa's herd? Olive. You've heard the song. "Olive, the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 22, 2023 Report Share Posted April 22, 2023 Joke: I Will Never Lie To You Boyfriend: I will never lie to you, dear. Girlfriend: How sweet! Boyfriend: Now you tell me a lie. SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 22, 2023 Report Share Posted April 22, 2023 Joke: My DeLorean I’m looking to sell my DeLorean... Good shape, low mileage... Only driven from time to time! Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 22, 2023 Report Share Posted April 22, 2023 Joke: Golf Gimme The definition of a "gimme" in golf can best be defined as an agreement between two golfers... Neither of whom can putt very well. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 22, 2023 Report Share Posted April 22, 2023 Having Some Resolve “Are you making any New Year’s Resolutions?” my friend asked. “Yes. I’ve resolved to stop playing so much polo,” I remarked. “Since when have you been playing polo?" “Never. But I figured that is one resolution I could keep!” SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 22, 2023 Report Share Posted April 22, 2023 Joke: Second Fiddle to a Dog Little Timmy loved his dog Laddie very much; they played together every day and Laddie was always there to greet Timmy when he came home from school. One day, while Timmy was at school, Laddie crawled under the fence, ran out into the street and was hit by a car and killed. Timmy's mother, naturally, was very distressed, not only by the matter itself but from wondering how she was going to explain this to Timmy. As Timmy walked through the door a few moments later, his mother mustered up her courage to speak to him. "Son, I have bad news. Laddie is dead." Timmy paused thoughtfully for a moment, shrugged, then said, "So, what's for lunch, Ma? I'm starved." "My, what a brave little boy you are!" his mother replies with relief. "You're certainly taking Laddie's death well." Upon hearing this, Timmy suddenly bursts into tears, his body racking with sobs, and says, "I thought you said Daddy." SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 22, 2023 Report Share Posted April 22, 2023 Joke: Thought I Found the One I thought my new girlfriend might be the one... But when I went through her drawers and found a nurse's uniform, a French maid's outfit, and a police woman's uniform, I changed my mind. I figure if she can't hold on to a job, she's not the one for me. SAKnight93 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted April 23, 2023 Report Share Posted April 23, 2023 Joke: Blowing Into the Ear Do you know what is, it call when a blonde blows in another blonde’s ear? Data transfer. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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