Wide Age Gap Relationship + R/ship Btw A Younger And Older Guy + Does Age Matters In A R/ship? (Compiled)

[Guest Mature]

A mature top has a better chance of finding a young bottom than a mature bottom hooking up a young top.  This is because many young bottoms still find mature tops attractive but young tops are not attracted to mature bottoms.   

[Guest guest]

Mature tops prefer young btms

Young tops prefer young btms

Most young btms also prefer young tops

 

So mature tops already have a hard time getting young btms

It is more challenging for mature btms to get young tops

[Guest phay]

21 hours ago, Guest Guest said:

Like benvoda and his mature bf? 

 

both are bottoms

[Guest ...]

10 hours ago, Guest phay said:

 

both are bottoms

 

serious?? but that old man is really his bf right? wow two btms. 

 

would fuck ben though. >: )

[musctop]

two bottoms as bf? Let me take over they will be my big and small wife

[upshot]

On 20/05/2016 at 0:02 AM, Guest Matured said:

Some younger tops like to bully me as the bottom because he's fucking me like charity. He'll insult that my hole is loose, I'm already wilted flower 殘花敗柳。

 

Anyway, I know that's expected and like he said, "You no like it you can walk out. You still want to open your legs then don't complain even if I rape you. Nobody's forcing you. 願者上鉤，操死你不用償命。,是你自己送上門來的。"

 

But not all matured men accept this type of humiliation.

 

I will never allow this kind of mistreatment and neither should you. One should always have self respect. Fulfilling a sexual urge in this manner is really not doing you much good for your self esteem. Get a toy. It has no such bias and cruel intention towards you.

[darkflame]

It would be interesting if the matured btm looked roughly the same age as the young top.

[dsd]

Treasure your Lao Ah Pek bottom(s)

Treat them with kindness.

Wet and loose fat bottom is a gift from heavens!

[tic-toc]

Tread starter, in my opinion, yr partner is only 40 years old, cannot yet be considered as a matured guy in gay terms. Furthermore the age gap between you guys is only 14 years. 

So your problem doesn't exist. End of story.  Wish you happy ever after and happy fucking. 

[tyan]

I guess in this case. The mature bottom will expect power top from the younger guy.

In term of number of times per night, more power-pumping stamina (just to name a few, there could be more).

So younger top, exercise more, eat more so that can have higher performance at night or morning or any part of the days. Hahaha

[Guest rob]

Interesting topic, Have learnt a few tricks here haha

[puppyfart]

That's sweet.

It's nothing to do with age (like who's older is the top) or body size (like who's smaller is the bottom) or marital status (like who's married is the top)

Think it's time to get rid of these stereotypes.
It's obvious he's into you - for you.

Good luck and hope you have a lasting relationship.

 

On 5/15/2016 at 10:43 PM, gymmr said:

I'm 26 and I just met this guy who is 40. We have been dating and things have been going well. The age gap has not been apparent because he says I act older than my age, and he acts (and looks) younger for his age. We have been dating for a month, and I am still trying to figure out the dynamics of my relationship. What do mature bottoms looks for in a younger top? I have traditionally been bottom and my exes have been older - that I can understand, older guy seeking to dominate and fuck the younger boy. I'm not sure about the reverse, and was hoping if anyone could share some insight

 

 

 

[kimlo777]

On 15/05/2016 at 10:43 PM, gymmr said:

I'm 26 and I just met this guy who is 40. We have been dating and things have been going well. The age gap has not been apparent because he says I act older than my age, and he acts (and looks) younger for his age. We have been dating for a month, and I am still trying to figure out the dynamics of my relationship. What do mature bottoms looks for in a younger top? I have traditionally been bottom and my exes have been older - that I can understand, older guy seeking to dominate and fuck the younger boy. I'm not sure about the reverse, and was hoping if anyone could share some insight

 

I am 60 this year and I have a younger Thai boyfriend who is in his early 40s.  He is married with children and is financially very well off.  He likes me for my frankness and enjoys talking and debating with me.  I like him for his maturity, manliness, and intelligence.  He makes me feel accepted and validates me as a person.  Of course, the sex is good too and he professes that I give the best head. 

[Guest Got Updates]

@gymmr , it is about a year. Hope your relationship is doing well.

 

[tinkero]

Im also hitting 40... omfg... im 

 Nothing actually.. just be yourself.. lol.. thats my answer luh

 

 

Edited April 25, 2018 by tinkero

[Guest Guest]

Are younger guys willing to go with someone older by him than 10 years? What are the odds?

If successful, are there any problems due to the age gap?

 

[yoyo74]

Can be easily done if the older one age very gracefully but there are others successful stories like the older guy more richer or has some personality the younger likes. I have personally seen several gay couple with age gap more than 10 years or 20 years

[Guest Heart pain]

My bf and I are 8years apart. Sometimes, I feel insecured being the older one. His friends are his age and I'm the oldest one in the group when we meet for dinner.

 

On a few occasioms, he would joke about my 'old' age like how I speak like his old senior colleagues... Frankly, I don't feel good or secure about my age when he's speaking about pokemon or recent songs in which I have no idea and this makes me feel like an awkward generation gap.

 

I don't know why but my heart hurts somehow Am I being too sensitive or why am I feeling this way? This is my first real relationship and don't have past experience like the rest.

 

I ever asked my good friend if our age gap is too big, but he said age doesn't matter. This universal politically correct answer is giving me paranoids as I wonder if it's the truth or just being nice since we've been together for a few years.

 

After being in my first relationship now, I came to understand that maybe what I want is not someone younger, but probably an older bf (+-3 years). I know I may not sound logical here and purely taking a weird approach to base a relationship on age. But at least we're not on generation gap having to know the different music era generation etc? 

 

Apology if I'm long winded. Hope to hear similar stories and tell me did you continue on the relationship? Do you think 8years gap is too big? Also, those having big age gap relationship, how do you cope with the situation when your younger bf jokes about the old era?

[GachiMuchi]

Seriously, you have issues. You are insecure about yourself and your age. You need to find out for yourself why you are feeling so.

I am approaching 55 and my bf is about half my age and I met him 5 year ago. Although I was a little apprehensive in the beginning about being a couple, we soon developed our feelings for each other and after being together for about a year, I asked him to move in with me. And we have been living together ever since.
 
Its better to find someone that you are comfortable with then worried about how many years apart you both are. As long as you both can click end are able to communicate your differences, then I don't see you will have any big problems.

 

Of course we had our fights and our quarrels but it helps to build a better relationship. I don't stop him from going out with his friends and I even encourage him to go out with them. I will sometimes join them when I can and  I would also ask him to join me with my friends for outings, etc.

Generation gap will always be there but I don't see it as a problem. We just need to respect each other view and sometimes agrees to disagree.

 

I went into a relationship with my eyes and mind open and I had not regretted making that decisions because I had gave much thought to it before going in.

 

So, if I don't have a problem with someone that is 26 year younger than me, what is 8 year difference in age?

 

Age IS just a number.

[Guest Olderme]

Age is not just a number when all the gay friends immediately ask who's the top and who's the bottom. Then all that bottom jokes. Gays are obsessed with bottoms jokes because of all the people in the world, most gays are the ones who discriminate against bottoms.

[Guest Heart pain]

10 minutes ago, GachiMuchi said:

Seriously, you have issues. You are insecure about yourself and your age. You need to find out for yourself why you are feeling so.

I am approaching 55 and my bf is about half my age and I met him 5 year ago. Although I was a little apprehensive in the beginning about being a couple, we soon developed our feelings for each other and after being together for about a year, I asked him to move in with me. And we have been living together ever since.
 
Its better to find someone that you are comfortable with then worried about how many years apart you both are. As long as you both can click end are able to communicate your differences, then I don't see you will have any big problems.

 

Of course we had our fights and our quarrels but it helps to build a better relationship. I don't stop him from going out with his friends and I even encourage him to go out with them. I will sometimes join them when I can and  I would also ask him to join me with my friends for outings, etc.

Generation gap will always be there but I don't see it as a problem. We just need to respect each other view and sometimes agrees to disagree.

 

I went into a relationship with my eyes and mind open and I had not regretted making that decisions because I had gave much thought to it before going in.

 

So, if I don't have a problem with someone that is 26 year younger than me, what is 8 year difference in age?

 

Age IS just a number.

 

Thanks for replying.

 

If he's around my age, at least there won't be jokes on generation gap or how he finds me speaking like his older generation colleagues. Frankly, I don't find it a flattery. 

 

Have you not encountered an incident where your bf is joking that you're preaching like his elderly Uncle or similar? How about him sharing deeply on the fun Pokemons that you're clueless about? Or the songs he's attuned to is newer generation but yours is 70s era? I'm not sure how you feel, but that's exactly where I'm coming from right now although mine isn't as big gap as >20yrs, but can feel it sometimes...

 

Of course, there are other topics to discuss about except those that involves favorite games, music, movies or even diff army generation matters would not hit the same note. I find the connection kinda off when what I'm sharing isn't part of his generation to fully comprehend what I feel deep inside and he can't relate to it sadly. 

 

I don't restrict him to meet his friends either, and in fact encourage him to. However, I occasionally join them since he asked again, and they would at times be discussing their old past time or insider jokes which I'm clueless and he'll explained a little. They would also try to chat on a more general topic to avoid me being lost in the conversation. They're nice but tiring for me and likely for them too. Maybe they are not comfortable with my presence since the things they laugh about isn't that funny to me and so I seem like the odd one out. 

 

Not sure if age is really just a number because it's all these little accumulation that I started to feel a little imbalance and insecured. I don't know how to further express my feelings right now but somehow don't feel good not being able to catch up to his generation gap. Especially after hearing from him that I sound exactly like his old  old colleagues and it hurts.. And that's when I wonder if we're closing to each other's age, there might not be an issue that leaves me feeling sad now

[Ironrod]

13 minutes ago, Guest Olderme said:

Age is not just a number when all the gay friends immediately ask who's the top and who's the bottom. Then all that bottom jokes. Gays are obsessed with bottoms jokes because of all the people in the world, most gays are the ones who discriminate against bottoms.

 

I think those are not your friends or u can't take a good joke.

[Ironrod]

13 minutes ago, Guest Heart pain said:

 

Thanks for replying.

 

If he's around my age, at least there won't be jokes on generation gap or how he finds me speaking like his older generation colleagues. Frankly, I don't find it a flattery. 

 

<Cut out>

 

Not sure if age is really just a number because it's all these little accumulation that I started to feel a little imbalance and insecured. I don't know how to further express my feelings right now but somehow don't feel good not being able to catch up to his generation gap. Especially after hearing from him that I sound exactly like his old  old colleagues and it hurts.. And that's when I wonder if we're closing to each other's age, there might not be an issue that leaves me feeling sad now

 

After reading what u posted, i think u should just breakup. You have made up your mind and as an older guy, u should be the stronger one but since this is not the case then pls proceed to exit and don't waste each other's time.

 

Obviously both of u don't click.

 

You need to put your ego down and both of you need to communicate. At 44, I am still playing FF14, Final Fantasy Mobius, listening to Nicky or Lana singing "Lust for life" - it's really not about age. It's about your own interest and likey vs his interest and liking. What's wrong with keeping up with times? Becos of younger friends, I also learn to use insta and found it fun. We should be humble and learn what we not know instead of just wanting to be in our comfort zone.

 

And as his partner you should be able to know if he is insulting u (as in putting u down) in front of his friends by saying u old or he is just joking.

 

Hope u see the light.

 

[GachiMuchi]

35 minutes ago, Guest Heart pain said:

 

Thanks for replying.

 

If he's around my age, at least there won't be jokes on generation gap or how he finds me speaking like his older generation colleagues. Frankly, I don't find it a flattery. 

 

Have you not encountered an incident where your bf is joking that you're preaching like his elderly Uncle or similar? How about him sharing deeply on the fun Pokemons that you're clueless about? Or the songs he's attuned to is newer generation but yours is 70s era? I'm not sure how you feel, but that's exactly where I'm coming from right now although mine isn't as big gap as >20yrs, but can feel it sometimes...

 

Of course, there are other topics to discuss about except those that involves favorite games, music, movies or even diff army generation matters would not hit the same note. I find the connection kinda off when what I'm sharing isn't part of his generation to fully comprehend what I feel deep inside and he can't relate to it sadly. 

 

I don't restrict him to meet his friends either, and in fact encourage him to. However, I occasionally join them since he asked again, and they would at times be discussing their old past time or insider jokes which I'm clueless and he'll explained a little. They would also try to chat on a more general topic to avoid me being lost in the conversation. They're nice but tiring for me and likely for them too. Maybe they are not comfortable with my presence since the things they laugh about isn't that funny to me and so I seem like the odd one out. 

 

Not sure if age is really just a number because it's all these little accumulation that I started to feel a little imbalance and insecured. I don't know how to further express my feelings right now but somehow don't feel good not being able to catch up to his generation gap. Especially after hearing from him that I sound exactly like his old  old colleagues and it hurts.. And that's when I wonder if we're closing to each other's age, there might not be an issue that leaves me feeling sad now

 

I prefers Nintendo games, I own a Wii and Wii U and 3DSXL among other Nintendo consoles. We did go and catch Pokémon at the park before when it started although I must admit I was not as excited as he was and has since stop playing.  I am thinking of getting the Nintendo Switch. But he is more a MMO player on his mobile.

 

I have never been bothered by the fact that I AM an UNCLE. I do share some of my views and concerns to him and do nag him sometimes when he keep losing his stuff, but that's what older and wiser men do when they see youngster not having sense of danger or are careless, etc. 
We listen to new song and also sings them although he listen to more songs than me. We watch Sing! China and other variety shows on YouTube together. When we go for Karaoke, I will usually let him sing more. That's sharing common interest and hobbies. 

 

Sometimes I do get frustrated with him at times when we have some disagreements but I will tell myself, that I had made my choice and had chosen him so I will live with my decision and will work to make things right. That's being understanding and compromising.

 

Well, you can find someone your age but I can tell you, if you can't be comfortable with each other, no matter what age is also pointless. Your relationship will still not work.

[yoyo74]

4 hours ago, Guest Heart pain said:

 

Thanks for replying.

 

If he's around my age, at least there won't be jokes on generation gap or how he finds me speaking like his older generation colleagues. Frankly, I don't find it a flattery. 

 

Have you not encountered an incident where your bf is joking that you're preaching like his elderly Uncle or similar? How about him sharing deeply on the fun Pokemons that you're clueless about? Or the songs he's attuned to is newer generation but yours is 70s era? I'm not sure how you feel, but that's exactly where I'm coming from right now although mine isn't as big gap as >20yrs, but can feel it sometimes...

 

Of course, there are other topics to discuss about except those that involves favorite games, music, movies or even diff army generation matters would not hit the same note. I find the connection kinda off when what I'm sharing isn't part of his generation to fully comprehend what I feel deep inside and he can't relate to it sadly. 

 

I don't restrict him to meet his friends either, and in fact encourage him to. However, I occasionally join them since he asked again, and they would at times be discussing their old past time or insider jokes which I'm clueless and he'll explained a little. They would also try to chat on a more general topic to avoid me being lost in the conversation. They're nice but tiring for me and likely for them too. Maybe they are not comfortable with my presence since the things they laugh about isn't that funny to me and so I seem like the odd one out. 

 

Not sure if age is really just a number because it's all these little accumulation that I started to feel a little imbalance and insecured. I don't know how to further express my feelings right now but somehow don't feel good not being able to catch up to his generation gap. Especially after hearing from him that I sound exactly like his old  old colleagues and it hurts.. And that's when I wonder if we're closing to each other's age, there might not be an issue that leaves me feeling sad now

If u keep nagging and preaching like a senile old man than it is confirm your own fault for unable to stand in his shoes and think.

At the age of 42 i also play Pokemon Go and also sprint like a mad  guy when Lapras or Snorlex pops out. Some of the young guys cant even out run me.

Music era? I dont even listen to music lol.

You are the one who is creating this generation gap unnecessary. Generation gap is no gap if you know the proper skill of communication. Even if u find a person with the same age as u r, you will also have generation gap if u dont know how to communicate.

[yoyo74]

4 hours ago, Guest Olderme said:

Age is not just a number when all the gay friends immediately ask who's the top and who's the bottom. Then all that bottom jokes. Gays are obsessed with bottoms jokes because of all the people in the world, most gays are the ones who discriminate against bottoms.

I never even want to do anal sex so i guess gays obsessed with bottom jokes is not true for me lol

[Guest Heart pain]

8 hours ago, Ironrod said:

 

After reading what u posted, i think u should just breakup. You have made up your mind and as an older guy, u should be the stronger one but since this is not the case then pls proceed to exit and don't waste each other's time.

 

Obviously both of u don't click.

 

You need to put your ego down and both of you need to communicate. At 44, I am still playing FF14, Final Fantasy Mobius, listening to Nicky or Lana singing "Lust for life" - it's really not about age. It's about your own interest and likey vs his interest and liking. What's wrong with keeping up with times? Becos of younger friends, I also learn to use insta and found it fun. We should be humble and learn what we not know instead of just wanting to be in our comfort zone.

 

And as his partner you should be able to know if he is insulting u (as in putting u down) in front of his friends by saying u old or he is just joking.

 

Hope u see the light.

 

 

The older one must be the stronger one? Then I think I'm not as strong as him. I play games but different. I listen to music but different era as good songs these days are so difficult to find. I used ig but meh, just a way to haolian around and publishing my private life isn't my type. However, my sense of fashion is much stronger than him and told him to change some of his wardrobe attires. 

 

There's a thin line between joking you're old and being insensitive. You know, like some colleagues/friends younger than you by >8years and keep addressing you as old man. It's a joke but not like they're any younger. E.g. when you're 41, they're 33. Deep down, you know it's a gap that's hard to fill no matter how hard it is to keep up.

 

7 hours ago, GachiMuchi said:

 

I prefers Nintendo games, I own a Wii and Wii U and 3DSXL among other Nintendo consoles. We did go and catch Pokémon at the park before when it started although I must admit I was not as excited as he was and has since stop playing.  I am thinking of getting the Nintendo Switch. But he is more a MMO player on his mobile.

 

I have never been bothered by the fact that I AM an UNCLE. I do share some of my views and concerns to him and do nag him sometimes when he keep losing his stuff, but that's what older and wiser men do when they see youngster not having sense of danger or are careless, etc. 
We listen to new song and also sings them although he listen to more songs than me. We watch Sing! China and other variety shows on YouTube together. When we go for Karaoke, I will usually let him sing more. That's sharing common interest and hobbies. 

 

Sometimes I do get frustrated with him at times when we have some disagreements but I will tell myself, that I had made my choice and had chosen him so I will live with my decision and will work to make things right. That's being understanding and compromising.

 

Well, you can find someone your age but I can tell you, if you can't be comfortable with each other, no matter what age is also pointless. Your relationship will still not work.

 

Uncle gachi, I quite envy your way of thought. Don't you find the disparity of age could make you tired? I find it very sian sometimes to remind him again of what to bring. He's so young yet can't be having a poorer memory than me, isn't it? And still ask me to remind him when the time comes nearer. Can't he set an alert in his mobile and this was conveyed to him until I don't feel like reminding anymore. Got bring just bring, forget just forget. Maybe I expect someone to be more mature. He IS matured but realistically, how much can I expect from someone 8years younger which is in fact gaps above my actual expectation. After some time, I'm just tired and wanna sit on the ride. A friend of his got said 老牛吃嫩草 jokingly once before. Seriously, do you say 'yes, thank you' reply? It sounds like a joke, but how do you take it hearing from them? It's an undeniable fact that the idiom applies the right description. Can I put my dignity down as a compromise? Maybe so. However, if this keeps haunting me back, treating me like an older generation... maybe I have to relook into my indecisiveness of accepting this relationship in the first place, hoping things would work out by itself on the age difference. On a basic level, we don't quarrel or shout at each other as it isn't my style. We're still good (no quarrels) but it's something that has been coming from me for some time, wondering am I the only older one in an age gap relationship having this thought?

 

4 hours ago, yoyo74 said:

If u keep nagging and preaching like a senile old man than it is confirm your own fault for unable to stand in his shoes and think.

At the age of 42 i also play Pokemon Go and also sprint like a mad  guy when Lapras or Snorlex pops out. Some of the young guys cant even out run me.

Music era? I dont even listen to music lol.

You are the one who is creating this generation gap unnecessary. Generation gap is no gap if you know the proper skill of communication. Even if u find a person with the same age as u r, you will also have generation gap if u dont know how to communicate.

 

Not sure how you converse with them in pokemon when they tell you this pokemon and that can counter effectively or a joke in regards to pokemon evolving into something they know but you don't, coz you either belong to pokemon era to laugh along or not. 

 

I believe my conversational skill is very proficient - be it someone my age or even younger or older. But I admit I can't connect to an early 20s, the things they shared with me are really new af. 

 

In retrospect, learning new things are fun admittedly, but if I'm constantly trying to act young by playing the same game or forcing to listen to their era music, then where's the fun.

 

Maybe I need to redefine what love really is. Compromising and how/what is love. Sometimes, I don't feel the love or maybe the way he express it isn't in line to mine? If different generation people get together, do they have to overcome more on their different era of perspective?

[yoyo74]

2 hours ago, Guest Heart pain said:

Not sure how you converse with them in pokemon when they tell you this pokemon and that can counter effectively or a joke in regards to pokemon evolving into something they know but you don't, coz you either belong to pokemon era to laugh along or not. 

 

I believe my conversational skill is very proficient - be it someone my age or even younger or older. But I admit I can't connect to an early 20s, the things they shared with me are really new af. 

 

In retrospect, learning new things are fun admittedly, but if I'm constantly trying to act young by playing the same game or forcing to listen to their era music, then where's the fun.

 

Maybe I need to redefine what love really is. Compromising and how/what is love. Sometimes, I don't feel the love or maybe the way he express it isn't in line to mine? If different generation people get together, do they have to overcome more on their different era of perspective?

Its not about whether you belong to pokemon era or not. Before Pokemon Go started i never play any other pokemon game and only occasionally watch its cartoon. I wanted to play this game cause i know it got the potential for me to connect with other gay members of this circle. I even created a Pokemon Go line group openly inviting all gay players inside. Inside this line chat group we would discuss about this game, form groups to go to a specfic area to catch the specific rare pokemons needed etc. I meet young and old gay pokemon players in singapore and communications are without any generations gap. When you are crazy about this Pokemon Go game, you will be like me start to read about this game in the internet which includes all the types of pokemon, which is the strongest pokemon, which is the rare pokemon, pokemon strength and weakness. You will have lots of ammunition for communication once you read everything up in the internet. You can even teach younger lazy players how to play this game. If you are crazy about this game like most pokemon players, you will also be like me lunch and dinner eat at desktop keep monitoring sgpokemap website for rare pokemon spawn. The only different is i cant do it during working hours. When a rare pokemon spawn, its time to turn into a predator and sprint madly at the prey location. When you run you will see all others running also and it really feels great when u succeeded it catching it.

[GachiMuchi]

3 hours ago, Guest Heart pain said:

Uncle gachi, I quite envy your way of thought. Don't you find the disparity of age could make you tired? I find it very sian sometimes to remind him again of what to bring. He's so young yet can't be having a poorer memory than me, isn't it? And still ask me to remind him when the time comes nearer. Can't he set an alert in his mobile and this was conveyed to him until I don't feel like reminding anymore. Got bring just bring, forget just forget. Maybe I expect someone to be more mature. He IS matured but realistically, how much can I expect from someone 8years younger which is in fact gaps above my actual expectation. After some time, I'm just tired and wanna sit on the ride. A friend of his got said 老牛吃嫩草 jokingly once before. Seriously, do you say 'yes, thank you' reply? It sounds like a joke, but how do you take it hearing from them? It's an undeniable fact that the idiom applies the right description. Can I put my dignity down as a compromise? Maybe so. However, if this keeps haunting me back, treating me like an older generation... maybe I have to relook into my indecisiveness of accepting this relationship in the first place, hoping things would work out by itself on the age difference. On a basic level, we don't quarrel or shout at each other as it isn't my style. We're still good (no quarrels) but it's something that has been coming from me for some time, wondering am I the only older one in an age gap relationship having this thought?

 

You are bothered by 2 things. Your expectations and Your Face value.

I am not bothered by what people say of me. So what if I am a 老牛吃嫩草 or cradle snatcher. Some of those are sour grapes, they are jealous because I can have a relationship with younger guys that last longer than them and they are still sulking that they have none.  Why should you be bothered what others says as long as you are happy with the love of your life?
If you want to be with someone younger, you would have to expect that they behave a certain way which may not be what you want. You were young once and I am sure you had done some of those things you had remind your bf before. Just let him make & learn from his own mistake. You are not there to teach him but to support and advice/guide him and let him make his own choices. You are his Boyfriend not his father.
My bf is rather absentminded and had left his watch at my place after staying over me on the 1st night. I thought maybe he left it on purpose so that he can come back and see me again. Then after getting to know him more, I realised that he is really very absentminded. He had lost a few of his MRT cards, left his phone in hawker center, in the cab, etc. Then finally one day he learned his lesson and left his bag in the coffee shop. We went back and can't find the bag, he lost $$$, documents, among other things. Nowadays, he is more alert and careful.  He just have to learn his lesson to wake up. This is what happens with youngsters. They have to sometimes learn things the hard way.  The only thing I can do to help is to try help him find his bag. I tried not to rub it in but I do remind him not to commit the same expensive mistake again.
Well, to me, I think you don't love your bf enough or the love had dwindled. Maybe you should have a heart to heart talk with him.

You can see here in BW that many people are bemoaning that they can't find someone and wondering what's wrong with themselves.

Now here is the thing. Relationship is work in progress. Both party have to put effort. There will be some sacrifices / commitment / compromise to be made. If it's not working out then leave on a good note. But the warning here is, don't regret when it's over because there may not be a 2nd Chance.
 

Your life, your choice, you decide!

Edited May 6, 2017 by GachiMuchi

[Guest ball]

hello, can  get some opinions/advice from my peers (20+), pls? ty

 

m currently 20+, recently got to knw a guy nearly 20 yrs older, n i felt we can connect

but he seemed reserved, din make any moves after knwing my age, i can feel he likes me jus tat he worries abt being so much older

we still chat n met up (no action hor) n i'm also a little confuse if i shld start this relationship

 

i knw all e 'theories' - age is jus a no., love has no boundaries, etc.

also read some posts here - some worked, some didnt (+ e posts were quite old, quite a while back)

 

so wld like to hear how my current peers wld do if they happened to knw some1 tat old, wld u guys start such a relationship, or totally not?

 

(of cos i'm not making my decision based on e views here, jus wanna hear them out - got a feeling it wld be easier if i were to make e 1st move...)

 

tks for reading n ur suggestions, if any

[fab]

Plus minus 15?

 

Anything more will look like father n son.

[Guest Smith]

I'm happily attached to someone about 20 years older...  Age is just a number, as long as two parties love each other, it doesn't matter. However age does come into place sometimes to rationalise things. A mature one usually have a different outlook on relationship as he has been through more. Just work on the differences and compromise 

[LeanMature]

Age does matter when the gap is too big, like grandfather and grandson.  

[G_M]

12 hours ago, SamTan said:

bro wanna pm me? Im 24, and im happily attached to a. guy thats 51.. we are very happy together

 

12 hours ago, SamTan said:

bro wanna pm me? Im 24, and im happily attached to a. guy thats 51.. we are very happy together

 

Please do not treat this discussion thread as your personal hookup.

 

You had been warned. If I see another ad from you in any more discussion thread and I will give you a long holiday from this forum.

 

[Guest Guest]

I have been in several relationships with various age differences.

 

1st relationship: I was 20 and he was 49 (29 years difference, lasted 2.5 years). There were a lot of challenges in the relationship.

1. Being old, he is set in his old ways and uncompromising in going out of his own comfort zone.

2. He had an upper hand emotionally in handling the relationship and manipulated my emotions in his favour by lying A LOT. You'll never be a priority because he is emotionally hardened.  

3. It is glaringly obvious to the world that you are a senior and junior couple.

 

2nd relationship: I was 23 and he was 20 (3 years difference, lasted 1 year). I thought dating an older guy was challenging - it is like going straight to level 99 opponent in the love game and I lost badly. I had assumed that dating a younger guy would be easier instead but younger boys also have their own set of issues.

1.  Parents. I never had to deal with this aspect when i was dating an older guy. His dad found out about us (by accessing to his phone) and threatened to beat me up if i continue to maintain contact with his son.

 

3rd relationship: I was 26 and he was 36 (10 years difference, lasted 2 years). Same issues as the 1st relationship.

 

Current relationship: I met him when i was 29 and he was 28 (We're still together and approaching 6 years). I can't be any happier and satisfied from the joys of dating someone around my age. 

1. Both of us are in the same stage of our lives. We learn and discover new things together.

2. We share with each other a lot about our work, bouncing off ideas and sharing our view as a 3rd party, handling situations at our workplace and and how to get more out of our careers. We also attended our respective workplace events / gathering as each other's partners. 

2. In terms of power in a relationship, we are equals. We discuss and negotiate when it comes to taking decisions (i.e. migration plans)

 

Final thoughts:

I guess the attraction from dating older men lies with my own insecurities (finding comfort and security with the idea of having an older guy with more resources and experiences to fall back on if you ever needed any help or going through any life crisis) and my own curiosities (in wanting to know about things ahead of my time, where your older partner had gone through and learn from their experiences). My takeaway from this was not to be fearful of my own insecurities and that I can be my own man. Everything will be unravelled in due time.

[Guest Young]

Likewise, I’m dating someone 17 years older than me.  Never considered him to be a potential partner before due to age gap but his actions moved me and I’m happily attached. As mentioned, the older one will usually have a pre conceived outlook to rs as they have been through more, thus in someway might be even possessive. Compromise is the way to go, and how you want your rs to be. Social judgement is just a minor issue

[Anon111]

Just a number

As long enjoy and satisfy

[LeanMature]

Very common for young bottoms seeking mature tops.  But not young tops seeking mature bottoms. 

[lovehandle]

On ‎3‎/‎6‎/‎2016 at 2:06 PM, kimlo777 said:

 

I am 60 this year and I have a younger Thai boyfriend who is in his early 40s.  He is married with children and is financially very well off.  He likes me for my frankness and enjoys talking and debating with me.  I like him for his maturity, manliness, and intelligence.  He makes me feel accepted and validates me as a person.  Of course, the sex is good too and he professes that I give the best head. 

u two still together? or separated by ctry?

 

the validate point is so gd!!!  while it is good to be validated , I felt doing the validating role on another person can be tiring if the person refuse to improve

 

leanmature's point is a spot on too, hopefully not due to vanity reason

 

[geizershow]

I find this notion very sexy! Because the mature bottom takes care of the younger top.. and the younger top gets to be a bit naughtier with the older bottom who tolerates it and gives in.. in the end both parties also happy

 

 

[KINKYMALAY]

the kinky-ness of a younger guy dominating the older... and of course the physique/stamina of the younger guy

[kimlo777]

3 hours ago, -Ignored- said:

u two still together? or separated by ctry?

 

the validate point is so gd!!!  while it is good to be validated , I felt doing the validating role on another person can be tiring if the person refuse to improve

 

leanmature's point is a spot on too, hopefully not due to vanity reason

yes we are still together and whenever i am in bangkok, we meet up. whenever he visits singapore for business, i spend time with him too.

 

[ManlyBearBtm]

HI boys, interesting write ups. Well my thoughts, i am a mature manly btm who had "legal age young top bf" before. Interesting how society looks at it as a sugar daddy thing. Quiet insulting esp when both parties never had money in mind in the relationship. Maybe cause my bf 's were rather fit as i got to know them in my sports circle. But if you are a mature btm who is thinking of having a young top bf, just go for it. No one has the right to judge cause you lead your life not them.  My relationships were really good ones, Had 2 and they were decent with lots of love off bed and wild love in bed

Still looking out for my top prince to come by for keeps but nevertheless, young top and mature btm does work well for me cause i know how to handle him and his feeling and give in when needed and take charge when needed so it is possible and nothing to be ashamed of.

 

Question you will have is why the break up then ? One was forced to marry due to family circumstances to continue the familyname, joke indeed. Second one migrated and long distance is tough to maintain.

 

Thanks for reading Anyquestions PM me hahahah

[Guest bonfire]

I was at a low phase of my life when I met my partner. He is much older and much richer (among his other traits). The friends who knew also joked that he is my sugar daddy. I don't blame them for they know how my life was. I feel grateful to have met him because he turned my life around. I hope someday, sooner than later, I can support him like how now he takes care of me without a second thought.

So, my advice is to stay true to your heart desire and care less about what others think.

Edited February 24, 2018 by bonfire

[LeanMature]

1 hour ago, bonfire said:

I was at a low phase of my life when I met my partner. He is much older and much richer (among his other traits). The friends who knew also joked that he is my sugar daddy. I don't blame them for they know how my life was. I feel grateful to have met him because he turned my life around. I hope someday, sooner than later, I can support him like how now he takes care of me without a second thought.

So, my advice is to stay true to your heart desire and care less about what others think.

 

How big is your age gap ?  Bottom son and Daddy Top ?

[upshot]

Never really looking for young stallions  .. it's what can click that counts but as you get more mature I guess it is not uncommon you end up with most being younger then yourself. Younger studs tend to be more butterfly then older tops or flexs you connect with. Sexually speaking anyway.

[Guest Curious]

Good day all, 

 

Would like to hear your views regarding couples with wide age gap, those with more than 10 years apart. How do you view them? And for those who are in such a relationship, mind sharing more of your experiences or any struggles?

[GachiMuchi]

On 3/7/2013 at 1:14 AM, GachiMuchi said:

Well, it so happens that I am 50 and my bf is 24. Somehow, the "Half Your Age Plus Seven Years" don't apply to us.  Still, we have been together for more than 7 month now and we are still going strong.  Not that we do not have our problems, but we make sure we talk about it.

 

Don't let anyone tells you that it won't work. For relationship to work;

 

LOVE + EFFORT + PATIENCE + UNDERSTANDING = RELATIONSHIP IN PROGRESS

 

I posted this about 5 years ago and we are currently celebrating 6 years together. So, relationship with younger man CAN work abide all our issues and differences. Giving up is easy, trying to get relationship to work needs effort. 

 

LOVE + EFFORT + PATIENCE + UNDERSTANDING = RELATIONSHIP STILL PROGRESSING

[Kenjikenji]

On 23/03/2017 at 9:07 PM, tinkero said:

Im also hitting 40... omfg... im a mature btm  

 

What do older btms look for in younger tops? Nothing actually.. just be yourself.. lol.. thats my answer luh

 

 

Agreed . I guess sometimes it just happen . As long Both comfortable  

[Guest Encouraged]

On 4/19/2018 at 1:29 AM, GachiMuchi said:

 

I posted this about 5 years ago and we are currently celebrating 6 years together. So, relationship with younger man CAN work abide all our issues and differences. Giving up is easy, trying to get relationship to work needs effort. 

 

LOVE + EFFORT + PATIENCE + UNDERSTANDING = RELATIONSHIP STILL PROGRESSING

I have just started a relationship wwith an older guy. I am 28 and he is 45. I didn't feel age is an issue at all when we first started 6 months ago. I still think the same now. I feel encouraged to know of your relationship and your mantra. Love requires patience and understanding regardless of age (perhaps more so for larger age gap). I love my boyfriend and will hold onto his hand whatever the future may entail.