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Just wanna have some story time.
This happened really unexpectingly and i feel that despite how 2020 has been to us, i still feel that there is still good left this year.
It all began when i was scrolling through Grindr randomly. Was not looking for anything in particular because at this age (i’m turning 30 this year), I was already not expecting much from this app anyway. But then suddenly i saw this profile. He was staying nearby too. His profile pic looks decent and i thought why not say Hie. So i decided to say Hie first. He is 36 this year btw. He replied.
The chat started very awkward with all the usual introduction. At this point, i didn’t expect much. He was very interested at the picture i gave him and he said it sure does gave him the attention.
At the very beginning the chat started out a bit slow. So i thought to myself, this was going to be another case whereby sooner or later the chat will die out and after that either one of us will ghost each other. But to my surprise, he replied willingly after each replies. We even greeted each other in the morning. Which I find to be very strange in a good way as i was not expecting it to be that way. Days goes by, and we seem to be very interested with our chats that it seem as though we really enjoy each other’s time chatting.
As we got to know each other, we decided we wanted to meet. So we exchanged contact with any hesitation. We seem to be so excited to meet as we were eager to finally able to see each other in person. So our first meet up was going jogging with each other. You can tell we were nervous but was trying to cover it up as we kept smiling to each other. We were happy when we finally met. So we had a good run till we ended up having fun somewhere. The session was hot as both of us didn’t had any fun for quite sometime. After that was done, it was not awkward at all. We continue walking back home as we chat. Can tell our conversation didnt stop as we chatted very naturally. I send him over at the mrt and waved goodbye.
So days after that first meet up, we continue chatting over at whatsapp. We grew closer to each other each day by making time over our busy schedules to meet up whenever we can.
Then came the whole Circuit Breaker period and this was when it really tested the both of us. Due to the strict restrictions, we were not able to see each other. Now this was the real hard part because the only way we got to see each other was through video calls. We both admit to each other that the situation made us miss each other a lot and the most sweetest thing was him using Grab services to deliver food/drinks/desserts for me. I was so touched at first and I returned the favour in doing the same thing too. We continue to tell each other that, once everything is ok, we will definitely see each other again.
Fast forward to Phase 2 and when finally we were able to see each other, that is when things got serious. There was a particular day after we met, he asked me a question which led to the truth being told. I lied to him that I didn’t have any social media accounts (i.e. An ig account). He didn’t believe me and didn’t make any sound. Throughout the day, it made me feel guilty because i kept thinking of all the things that he had done for me.
I didn’t wanna let him know my instagram account because at that point of time, i was attached with a girl. Yes, i thought I was bi.
So before the day ends, I decided to tell him the truth. It was so hard for me to let him know that i broke down in tears trying to explain my situation. Despite him being hurt, he still cares for my feelings and he hugged me. He understand what was i going through and he was glad that i told him earlier before we went on further. That night was the lowest point in my life and for the both of us too. He told me he was cheated before. Just before we chatted, he recently broke up with his ex bf whom he was together with for more than 5 yrs. Can tell that night he was really down. He really thought it could work out between us and he poured out his feelings that night. We couldn’t stop texting each other that night till about 3am. I was crying non stop because we were trying to find a solution for this. We tried so hard to make each other to leave but our hearts really can’t take it.
I knew how i felt that day and i knew i had to come out and be true to who i am. I couldn’t lie to myself anymore. This event made me even realise more that at this point in my life, i needed to make a clear direction to where i am going.
The next morning we texted each other, our usual good morning. But we both didn’t slept well. I felt so guilty that i ordered his fave coffee delivery to his house. He was touched and he said he misses me. But he couldn’t stand the fact that I am still someone else’s.
That was when i realise and made a decision. So i took the huge leap of ending of my r/s with my gf (she is my ex now). I decided not to let her know the real reason but i kept it generic with her. I knew sexually, i was not aroused by females.
Once that was settled, I let him know of my decision and he was very supportive of it. He was glad that I looked happier now and that was the only thing he wanted, for me to be happy.
After the whole saga, we were chatting even more and going out for dinner when we were finally able to dine out together recently.
Till today, we decided not to have any status or told each other that we were dating. I mentioned my feelings to him before till one of the day inside my car when i was sending him off. We kissed goodnight and i accidentally said, ‘i love you’. He was shocked and smile shyly but did not reply. He texted me after that saying that he didn’t wanna sound bad to me but he said he was not ready for another r/s yet. He can’t seem to open his heart yet after what happened to him previously. I totally understand his situation but he felt that it was unfair to me if he would to keep me waiting.
So now, we are really just enjoying each other’s company and having ‘fun’ with each other once in a while but we haven made it official yet. I want him to be my boyfriend and i think he also would like to have that but i think his heart was wounded the last time around and so he didn’t want to be hurt again.
As of now, we are just going through each day. Are we friends with benefits? Are we dating? Will we be tgt as bf one day? I don’t know, only time will tell. Anyone went through somewhat similar situation? Hehe
So what are your thoughts?
Share your own personal experiences of Malaysia Gay Saunas/Massage stories. Would like to hear some stories of you guys. What did you do / cruise to get the guy that you wanted? How was the feeling with the person? Would you like to go back again? Share some thoughts and experiences right here.