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[Hiv Support Group] Living A Life Being Hiv+ & Living With Someone Who Is Hiv+ (Compiled)


Guest Sin_Man

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frankly,if my lover HIV+ & i truely deeply love him,i wont leave him but stay beside him,just tat i need to be very careful & safe sex with him always.To me once i love a person,he will be my forever no matter wat

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Guest PleasantChap

I volunteered and had some experience - different people reacted differently - Some are lost and afraid, they just cried and cried. Some simply shut themselves out and kept quiet. Some were positive and cheerful. Some were simply aloof. Personally I feel that they would appreciate acceptance. Just be nice and understanding. Welcome them as you would welcome your other friends.

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hmm, thanks for ur new topic (i refer to guest)..

For me, i think if u love him.. u will do anything for him...

For those who suffered from the disease, wat i can say is... see the bright way..dont think too much... just think abit more.. humans 1 day need to go back to the ground named earth as their time is up.. it is more like a engine die down and let the new ppl take over... DOn u guys think so>?

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i knew someone and he ever told me he may have AIDS and honestly i dont give a damn at all because i love him and it dont bothers me . im totally prepare to go all the way with him no matter what happen to him and to grow old with him and take good care of him

but i was not loved by him no matter what i do and i did not tell him what i just wrote here because its useless ;;;;;;;;;;

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Living with HIV can be difficult both physically and emotionally. There is always a stigma behind it. Our society is not open to accept it as someone who is suffering from other illness such as cancer or heart problems. In several cases, the patients have to keep the illness and sufferings to themselves. I came across patients ward themselves to CDC and discharged after few days, all by themselves. Very lonely indeed. Some of the family members were kept in the dark till the very last minute when the patient is getting into critical conditions. Some families members even refused to visit them on their death bed. Really make me cried when i knew cases like these. On top of these issues, the frequent taking time off from work for regular checkups also imposed alot of queries from their employers. The medications are so expensive that a portion of the monthly salary goes into it. Many victims will be too weak to work after adopting Aids. Therefore they need financial assistance as well.

All in all, we have to accept them as normal human beings, with respect and dignity, encourage them to be as productive as usual. Emotional support is a must to see them through those obstacles ahead. However, there are many out there who are still afraid of getting intouch with the victims and created biasness. This will only discourage more victims to remain silent and retreat into depression.

We should read and understand this infection and its spreading modes, and divert our attention and love to these victims whenever is necessary. AFA has tried their best to provide good support to these victims. Hereby, i salute to their services. :)

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HIV is damning in every sense of the word. But this disease is no more, no less, as devastating to one's life as TB was as recent as 50 years ago. Then, anyone who caught tuberculosis or consumption, just waited to die from it. There was no cure. People avoided TB sufferers like the plague and many sufferers were marginalised and had to live alone and led very lonely, sad lives. No one would share food with them or come close. The stigma was just as great.

Even today, people still die by the millions from all kinds of cancers. And now we are at the throes of a possible avian (bird) flu epidemic with no sure cure in sight.

The point I am trying to make is we live among mutating bateria and viruses and if it is not this disease then it is another. I am not making light of HIV, but if we all can see it in perspective and in the context of fatal diseases, then we can approach sufferers with more compassion and humanity and give them all the support that they need to help them through the difficult times.

"Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok"

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Guest Sin_Man

You guys are great people. Thanks for droping by your valueables comments, you are much appreciated. May GOD bless you all.

By the way a little more help will be helpful if you could help us (My boyfriend n I ) who are at 'lost' after I was diagnosed as HIV+ recently. Living wif HIV partner can be very uncertain wif the 'DO' n the 'DONT' when Emotional, Psychological, Spiritual n Sexual were involved. I do hope you guys will be able to drop a line for me n my boyfriend to lead these life as beautiful n meaningful as before.

I must say that I am very proud of him, despite the unsureness of my journey he still n will love me till my last breath.

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You guys are great people. Thanks for droping by your valueables comments, you are much appreciated. May GOD bless you all.

By the way a little more help will be helpful if you could help us (My boyfriend n I ) who are at 'lost' after I was diagnosed as HIV+ recently. Living wif HIV partner can be very uncertain wif the 'DO' n the 'DONT' when Emotional, Psychological, Spiritual n Sexual were involved. I do hope you guys will be able to drop a line  for me n my boyfriend to lead these life as beautiful n meaningful as before.

I must say that I am  very  proud of him, despite the unsureness of my journey he still n will love me till my last breath.

Hey Sin_Man & partner

Something i need to share with you too.

I got a friend who was HIV+ many years ago and unfortunately he developed AIDS later on. But he wasnt alone, his brave and respectable bf was with him all the time. His bf will look after his every needs without a single word of complaints and ever uttered any frustration at all. I used to visit my sick friend regularly at his home, to keep both of them company. I could clearly see and understand what true love is all about. I was touched by the sacrifices made. His bf gave up his full time job eventually to look after his love. The tasks were getting tougher as my friend's health deteriorated, transforming my once goodlooking friend into a bony sick old man. Silent tears were shed whenever i visited both of them. There were times his bf wept silently infront of me while sharing the pains he felt for his lover. He could feel the time was running out and his miseries of losing his dear one became unbearable. Perhaps due to the side effects of the drugs, my friend got shorter memory and became temperamental, making things more difficult and unbearable at times. I tried to spend time listening to his bf, trying to give him some strength to carry on . I could feel the impacts and difficulties he was facing. sharing some of his stress and frustration looking after someone whose health wasnt getting no better but worsen each day. Never easy to take care of a sick person, but he tolerated and insisted to carry on instead of sending him to some healthcare home.

My friend passed away. At the funneral, i stood besides his bf whose eyes were dried but looked dazed and tired. He told me it was the end of his duty to look after his love and he had done his best. He would carry with him those good memories and move on........That was the last time i heard from him.

From that period onwards, I have been convinced true love between two guys is possible in this world. :mellow:

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" From that period onwards, I have been convinced true love between two guys is possible in this world. "

Thaiboys, i do believe there is true forever Love, just how many cases for that, it's like TOTO or Sweep,are you the first prize winner? Mostly not even in your whole life, you can look around your friends, love come & go so fast, not everyone that Lucky, mind i ask since your friend's bf so gd to him, why he still flirt around till he get HIV+? Do he know that maybe he could spread to his lover too? That's so selfish.

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" From that period onwards, I have been convinced true love between two guys is possible in this world.  "

Thaiboys, i do believe there is true forever Love, just how many cases for that, it's like TOTO or Sweep,are you the first prize winner? Mostly not even in your whole life, you can look around your friends, love come & go so fast, not everyone that Lucky, mind i ask since your friend's bf so gd to him, why he still flirt around till he get HIV+? Do he know that maybe he could spread to his lover too? That's so selfish.

I should say that if one believes there is true love, he will get what he is seeking one day. On the other hand, like yourself, who think its only one is a million, there is nothing wrong too, just carry on with your hit and run cases.

Well, my friend was diagnosed with HIV before knowing his bf. Perhaps it was due to the fact that they were truely in love, his bf did not change his mind but continue to love my friend. No one could challenge his decision and determination, he chosen his path and willing to take care of my friend out of love.

I dun know the sex life between them and i believe since both of them were matured enough to make their decision. Till now, i am strongly moved by their strong love. Since the whole thing has been over and the both of them are now in different world, there is no point for us to probe further into it. My wish is to highlight to sin_man to continue to have trust in his bf and take care of each other along the way.

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Guest guest123

how come couples cant be faithful to each other........

can anyone advise is it natural when your lover flirt around and do you have to close one eye and let him enjoy his flirting?

my lover is one of them and when we go to saunas he had sex with other men and i just sit there

is it natural in gay relationship? what type of relationship is this call

after reading thaiboyz story

i also realised that why the lover flirt and get hiv and the faithful lover of his still stand by him

he must be a very strong man and this make me realised that i had to be like him and stand by my lover though he flirt . do you think i should do that ?

because im confuse and always tell myself why why why

can anyone enlighten me on this?

greatly appreciate it

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guest123, as wat i said b4, not everyone is that Lucky, mind i ask how long you attach? I don't believe there is 100% faithful, close one eye a must in Love relationship for gay or str, you should know what type of person he is when you both dating, so no point complain now, is easy, accept who is he & continue this open relationship, else give up & look for your ideally love, the choice is yours, if you still willing to go with him then dun regret in future when he found someone new

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Guest bystander

hi, guest123,

it is not universally true that gay men like to flirt.

i am surprised that you and your bf go to sauna, and he had sex with other men in sauna. i am also surprised that you are able to accept that he is having sex with other men.

some other gay couples i know are totally monogamous to each other.

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monogamous? Give me a break, may i ask any couples here that are really still having monogamous even after 5 years or more than 10 years, be true to yourself, i will like to know.

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Guest jackally

Dear guests and frequent writers,

I would like to share my comments on gay relationships.

Love between two people begins with some form of attraction - it's often phy sical, usually behavioural, sometimes paradoxical repulsion initially (attraction of the opposites), occasionally spiritual. Perhaps for gay relationships, the role of the physical is typically predominant. This, I attribute to a biological nature of the male.

Attraction brings about consolidation. In the early part of consoliation, this involves getting to know each other in depth, though never completely (because it is impossible). Our personal barriers break down so that we focus on each other's positive attributes, and play down their negative attributes. For gays, this phase may reside on a highly physical plane (lots of sex). This, I also attribute to the biological nature of the male.

In the later part of consolidation, we begin to reform our own personal barriers. We start to really observe our partner's negative attributes as well, and actually make some noise about what irks us. Consciously or unconsciously, we start to evaluate the path the relationship is leading us to.

At this very fragile stage of the development, the topic of fidelity will emerge. If the partners have established for themselves a clear understanding of the nature of their sexual relationship (ie monogamous, open or whatever), they will then move on to the next stage. If they have not had a clear unequivocal understanding of their sexual relationship (especially for gays), they remain in this very fragile and unstable stage until it is resolved, either by dissolution or compromise.

Finally, we move into the phase of maturity when we have established that the love between the partners encompasses respect, trust and sincerity. The relationship now goes onto a higher plane - working towards a common home, a common future, some common life goal etc.

Unfortunately, stepping into this last phase doesn't equate stability forever. Partners have to continue working to reinforce their unity, their key values, continue 'refreshing' means to dissipate the boredom and routines in their lives (be it sexual or whatever). This is an universal phenomenon, whether gays or straights. Husbands who stop having sex with their boring and frumpy wives often seek exciting sex with younger nymphs outside. Gays who get sick and tired of their usual anal (or whetever that is predictable) sex routine start seeking exciting encounters outside.

The key to sustain fidelity is mutual effort to stay committed to each other, to reinvent ways to spruce up their sex life, consider commoner activities and so on.

As you can see, guest 123 is in the stage of consolidation. This is the weakest link. But it is also a good time to re-evaluate one's relationship. It is time to stop loving blindly. Trust me, it's the time to let the head to rule the heart now.

Jack

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  • 2 months later...

IS IT BETTER TO KNOW OR NOT TO KNOW...

It's kind of hard to find the threads, and I do recall reading a thread about living with HIV in this forum somewhere... Alas!! I found it, embedded in Page 5...

The question I posted as a header, is something that happened to me lately. Of course, naturally, we'll all answer 'Yes! It's better to know if we are HIV positive or negative". But the friend who posed me the question placed me in his shoes, and I did get an insight of his fears. That's when I do ask myself, better to know and face the music, or not to know....

In his recent trip to a gay capital of Asia lately, he had an argument with his boyfriend. In anger, he stormed out of the hotel, and landed himself in an Go Go Boy bar. He didn't call for any boy, but rather, a boy offered himself to him. He enticed him, seduced him etc etc, and even tell my mate he's willing to do anything for him to pleasure him. My friend was resisitant in the first place, but gave in eventually. They proceeded to some fxxk shed motels nearby, and when things got serious, the sex worker claimed that he's not ready for anal sex and does not have a condom in his posession. In a fit of anger (remembering all the quarrels earlier and the promises of the boy's promises to do ANYTHING), my friend proceeded to fxxk the boy without the rubber (HOW STUPID!!!)

He came back remorseful, regretting his decision. He knows he shouldn't ahve done it, but what's done cannot be undone anyway. He used to pride about taking a test every six months to know he's clean, but this's the first time he's unsure if he wants to do the test. He managed to placed himself in a high risk group, and he's uncertain if he wants to know, and face the music. He told me, the fears he had when we took the first test together 10 years back, had all resurfaced again...

I am hardly caught dumbfolded, but in this case, my dearest mate for a decade managed to make me ponder, and save my usual crappy philosophy on how it's better to do these and that... I remember 10 years back when we took the test together as two fearful teenagers and hugged and cried over the 2 weeks 'death sentence' period. I played safe since, but he crossed the line. Even in this instance, I fear for him to take the test, for I can't face the music of being about to lose a close friend.... I am lost for words.

I wonder if this had happened to anyone in this forum. If you're in my shoe (or my friend's shoes), what will you do. Well, before you go all blabbering about 'Yes, should definately go", place yourself in his shoes, with all emotions in placed....

Procrastination... The biggest mental vacation one can have.

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Guest Guess x3

TTS, I understand how your friend is feeling right now as I have similar experience before. The feeling of "waiting" is unbearable. But, no matter how, your friend has to face it -- be it now or later. Its better to know the "result" now (as it may turn out to be OK) then living in fear for the rest of his life. What he needs is the emotional support from friends like you.

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  • 5 months later...

Just wanna share my ups and down and see if there are others like me out there? I got it at the end of the year 2000,where everyone's happily celebrating the BIG 2000. The check-up I done came up positive :( ---- I do check-up bi-yearly.

Tried ending my life (cut my waist and overdose with boozes and sleeping pills) but I didn't die.The police trace the last call I make to a close friend using public phone.In the ambulance they talk to me.I can hear but can't react.The nurse keep slapping my cheeks and told me hang on-wake up.Oxygen mask given then I when into shock.All the things they did in the hospitals,I can hear but can't feel.( I do remember seeing two paths-one very bright-one very dark.I was standing in the middle-lost.Untill a childhood friend that died a decade back came to tell me-quickly run to the bright light.I did cus I was so scared.I jerk up awake but only for awhile then I black out completely.The doctor safe my life.I was 26 at that time and shouted @#%$ to the lady doctor when I woke up the next day.But then I noticed so many tubes here and there and I was in pain and yet I shouted at her.And I remeber she said that all those tubes are going to be there for weeks so live with it.I panicked, don't know what came over me-I became like a mad man.Trying to take it out myself.It was untill 4-5 hospital staffs needed to hold me down till I saw the doctor's hand with a jab.Seconds later I fell asleep.

Wake up the next day,hands and feets tied to the bed.Different doctor came and ask me what happen yesterday.I only cry.I ask them why safe me? But now I do thanks them for saving my life.The police came and told me its an offence to take my own life but they will let the matter rest and a warning to me.

:( ( to be cont. )

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Guest MySpiritFliesToYou

Dear HIV+,

In brotherhood, I can only offer you my prayers for your strength, will and painless health and for a peaceful life ahead. I am not in the same situation but I feel that I can understand your situation.

For a man who experienced the 'light', I believe that you are far better than most of us. I believe you recognised the wisdom to the purpose of life with that experience. I believe you could nurture the process of from-the-womb-to-the-tomb with a better insight as you face each day of your life.

Have faith despite your condition. I am sure, many of us, that are reading your story will offer prayers for your well being. With prayers, I believe that your burden will be lightened.

Thank you for writing.

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Guest Trapped

Yes, thanks for sharing your experiences...

I guess it is only when we are faced with the spectre of death before us, that we really learn to live. This is sad but true...when we are healthy and think we have many, many years before us, we tend to waste our lives away. It is only when we know our time on this earth is short and limited, do we treasure every moment and live it to the fullest.

Your sharing has caused me to once again think through my priorities in life and realign them...

It is only when we realise we don't have forever, that we start to live...

I hope you will use your life and experiences wisely from now, to further encourage, advise and uplift those around you, so that you will leave a legacy of lives, you have touched, behind you.

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Dear HIV+

I am very much saddened to hear about your situation. I am sure many brothers/sisters from this forum will not hesitate to give you moral support. After the ordeal, I am sure you have emerged as a stronger person. And thank you for sharing your experience with us.

Take care (hugssss)

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Dear myspiritfliestoyou , thanks for your concern and prayers. But I have not finished my story for the next 6yrs till now.I change to another person till I myself couldn't accept.Till now I still can't accept the fact that I am positive.Only last year then I told my parents.

But now I do need some feedback and advice from you guys.Actually I can consider very' luo chiao' in blowing wind.I came to know this site during 1998.

Ok,please don't write hurting remarks if you don't like it.I just wanna say I am sori to all my ex-bf.( I don't meant to hurt you guys )

I am still attractive,fit and no syptoms yet.I am a guy who alway wants true love.My doctor's once told me-true love does not happen in everyone lifetime.I guess it's true,more ever that with this illness.

When I go clubbing and met someone,its so hard to want to know that person and yet if things develop.Will he accept me or tell people about me when he saw me again outside.I have been there-done that.We can't stop their mouth but I have always believe in karma.

Now that I am attached again,its always the feeling that I don't matach up to him.I have this illness.Yes,he love me accepted me.But down the road is it fair for him.If my health got worse or if I pass it to him?I love him but yet got to let go.It's a road only I have to travel myself.

My parents always tell me to do what I want or like.After lots of travelling alone.I am lost again.I need love but yet I can't get over my own evil.

( to be con;t )

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Guest MySpiritFliesToYou

Dear HIV+,

It's a pleasure to hear that your life moves on. I believe you had been given a second chance. In this state, however, it takes us to comprehend the meaning of gratitude and appreciation. You have succeeded and I am sure that with every breath of life and events awaken you everyday, you are finding more courage to embrace the true self.

Yes, there will be people that will walk away knowing about your condition. Some will, probably, dwell into your past and asking you to reflect on your actions. You must know, however, that whatever you hear or see IS no longer important. You have to embrace living in the moment of nowness.

May I recommend you to disrobe yourself from the earthly desires and focus on your true being. To me, a true being is about living life to embrace peace and joy. Give gratitude to the second chance where you are in a cocoon of love with someone who is not judging you. This is the greatest gift that are given as you had always yearned for it.

Only when we stop looking that life has started. I believe, my brother HIV+, that when you seek solace [and probably meditation will do you good] that you will be able to forget about what-others-think-of-you but about creating a life for yourself.

My respect goes to your partner who has a beautiful soul, and for accepting you without judgement and conditions. May the two of you live in a miracle blessings.

*Hugs*

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:)

I believe I do not have any position to give you concrete advices...but I just want to share some thoughts with you.....

Having this illness is painful..in terms of emotional disturbances..but I hope you are careful and tactful when comes to any close contacts....you have been throught this illness for yrs, I hope you dealt with great care....

Life is precious, you are here because of your parents...do think of their up bringing.....and you still have good reliable friends around you to give you support....yes you may feel lonely, because you tend to be more protective and not open up your emotion being the fact that this illness is will be a hindrances to you or stick with you forever....

Yes, you sufferred, why not think of others who are in this world are more tortured and more sufferring than you....we tend to compare people who are better than us, but in actual fact there are many who are not as good as us...you can share your concern and give social support to the more unfortunate....this will make you more happier....

I truly hope you take good care of your body and with healthy mind and soul.

:thumb:

cheers

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Dear HIV+,

You have to stay postivie and be strong, have faith and confident in the treatment. Though, it can be a long process.

Stay focus on your priorities now, get yourself occupied with meaningful things.

(i.e. spend more time with your loved one, parents, families etc.) Find something inspirable.

As for you BF, if he has accepted who you are and knowing your condition/situation. When come to making love, both of you can still pratice safe-sex.

I have HIV+ friends too (Straight & PLUs).. some live as per normal life, some totally screwed up and feel disturbed since, and sadly some died. (I was at the Hospital during his last stage when he's condition get worsen.)

You can PM me if you wish to talk about something, anything.

BTW. After hearing your life story, hope everyone ponder abit...

Interestingly, I was watching the Channel-U "Shoot" programme and today they discussed about AIDS victims, social responsibilities and self-discipline etc.

Warmth regards,

Hary (..never too late to realise life can be wonderful)

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Sad to hear your story, i know a couple that had just found out that they had HIV early this year. It happened around chinese New Year, it took my friend a great deal of courage to tell his partner that he is positive. Sad to say that his partner went for the test also and was also found to be positive too. They went through a rough time trying to accept their status and there is alot of things that they have to factor in. Cost of medication is in hundreds per month, families, the "status" and procedures after death is a cause of worry.

I know that there is alot of people that is involved in Raw sex, please do be careful as there are HIV + people going round infecting other people either knowingly or unknowingly..

webi webi....

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Guest anonymous

Hi HIV+,

Sorry to be nosey. Just want to find out from you how you got infected. Is it from raw anal sex? Or maybe some other things. And do you know who infected you? I do hope you take care of yourself.

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This thread brings to my mind a related topic, i.e. sexponsibility (sex responsibility). I strongly advocate that people who have sex with strangers or multiple partners (whether raw or otherwise) should go for regular HIV testing. If identified as positive, one should not go around infecting others. This is I what I call sex responsibility. However, I know real life is far from this ideal. If as many of us practise sexponsibility (include safe sex), I think there will be less miserable people in this world.

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Dear all for your care and concern and prayers, actually lots of people out there would really know how I got it. Well, my parents business went down hill and we are really broke with no house to stay soon.I quit my army regular job and when into social escourt. The first guy that I slept with was old enough to be my father,I cried to myself in the shower,hate myself,wanted to stop there.But I don't have a choice, my family needed money fast.

When I was young, I watch movies and always wonder why people must became hookers? Don't they have a choice? I know the answer now.I know people out there might look down on me but you guys really don't know what I went through.Some may call it easy money but trust me....some customers are not human.But some really are kind hearted.Others escourts always ask me why trying to earn so much money every month,take a break.But they never knew my family problems.It was when a regular wanted to pay me lots of money but wanna RAW.I did it but How I know I would regret the rest of my life.I do with him a few times then I never saw him again.It was untill last last I saw him at a mall.He saw me and walk away very fast without a HI.I guess I got the answer all along.I was very angry that time but now.....Don't think he really want to pass it to me if he know he's positive too.My fault too cus I wanted the money.During that time got a escourt did with him too and he was positive too.Don't know is it coincidense?

But there was one more muscular guy I slept with (unprotected) during that time as I was very druonk after clubbing and went to the sanua.We @#$% each other up.Saw him last year too but he is very slim toned now compare to the last few yrs we met.Don't know is it him or the customer?

My advice to all those still doing unprotected sex! Stop it right now! You may think-come on-where got so easy to get.But if you got it-you will regret for the rest of your life but it's no use.I and those infected will only know how tough the journey is.

Channel news asia did a interview with me few yrs ago.I really did tell singapore how I really got it but hardly and sadly in real life,people will not heed advise untill it is too late,like me.

And also please do regular check up like I do.I know it early thus I would be able to stop sex activity.I know lots of guys out there including my frds would not go for a checkup but still having sex unprotected.Stop spreading and kill life cus you will never know till you check-up.

I got it when I was only 26, where I thought I got a bright future ahead.But I knew there are younger people than my age that got infected in singapore.

Sadly to many,when you tell them you got cancer,they feel sad for you.If you tell them you are HIV+,they felt you deserved it and would want to get as far from as possible.That's life-no one can change one person mind set. :P

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Guest MySpiritFliesToYou
Sadly to many,when you tell them you got cancer,they feel sad for you.If you tell them you are HIV+,they felt you deserved it and would want to get as far from as possible.That's life-no one can change one person mind set. :P

.. And hence, that is why we have the Yellow Ribbons campaign. A Second-Chance opportunity towards social misbehaviour is not easy to gain public sympathy. You are, indeed, right to point out the keyword, 'mindset' - the very key that holds the power for change.

Every disease tells a story. According to Louise L. Hay, a metaphysical teacher, in her book 'You Can Heal Your Life', Aids sufferers have a common probable root that lead to the disease, that is:

- Feeling defenceless and hopeless. Nobody cares. A strong belief in not being good enough. Denial of self. Sexual guilt.

HIV+, you may want to consider her method of healing. Of course, for such a method to succeed, you have to be in charge of your mindset and assume a new thought pattern. She believes that, when Aids sufferers are to repeat the new thought pattern [below], it brings about a new consciousness towards the process to heal.

Here is the new thought pattern:

"I am part of the Universal design. I am important and I am loved by Life itself. I am powerful and capable. I love and appreciate all of myself."

PS: Once again, thank you for sharing your life story. Indeed, it jogs consciousness within me.

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  • 3 weeks later...
It's very brave of you to run into the bright light.

Yes i agree. It is the bane of every gay man's life to get this diease. YOu are a brave man to write all this and to want for others to take the path of safety. I do encourage you to carry on with your life and find meaning in all that you do. Who knows your plight might actually have saved others from taking the same route as you did when you did not know better.

All the best to you.

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HIV+

Sorry to hear your condition...

Look on the brighter side. The sun still shine for you, the birds (erm... maybe lesser) still chip and chip.

Death is not so a much thing to fear I guess. Maybe your fear is the unknown. There is so many unknown in this world which some poeple know, many of us live in an unknown world, do not fear, or dismay.

Sorry for being blunt about what I may have to say next. Yes, from what I read in your description, I will say, you deserve it. But that does not mean you deserve to be ill-treated, shun upon, cast off or any other non-human treatment. It is because you are human, you have desires ,needs, passion for life, which is why it makes you a common normal person. And as normal person, we all have a chance of contacting HIV.

Ignore the abuse and insult of what other people offered. You have much to gain than them, enlightenment. While many of us still lives in a fantasy world of dreams where our eyes are paste with stamp (many of us do), your eyes are clear and wide open. :)

Prejudice is born out of ignorance. So you are much better. You will find many friends :)

For one, I would be your friend :)

hugz hugz

It's just me.... Asura... don't fear, but be very afraid....

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Hey there,Thanks for everyone that still send yr concern and love :P

I am taking medications soon but after reading some of the post on HIV medications---I really have second thoughts.I am lost again.

And is it fair for my boyfriend to go through all the pain with me? I love him but knowing that I may not be with him forever.Saden me alot.Sometimes as the saying goes --- if you love someone,let him go. :P

Funny thing that happen to me in my 1st love,same thing. After 5 yrs relationship with my bi-bf.He wanted to get married and no contact with me at all.What to do---if you love someone,let him go :P

Even if I don't, what do I gain? He will be happy with his wife.And I,lonely,sad and despressed.For 5 yrs,we didn't quarel at all.Not untill the day,He sad he wanted to get married.

My mother once told me,son,if everyone is like you then in this world,there would be no enemy.I

I would like to know more HIV+ singles or couples out there.How are you guys coping about life and love.Thanks.

Thanks again for the love and concern from you guys,I can feel it. :P

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Hey there,Thanks for everyone that still send yr concern and love :P

I am taking medications soon but after reading some of the post on HIV medications---I really have second thoughts.I am lost again.

And is it fair for my boyfriend to go through all the pain with me? I love him but knowing that I may not be with him forever.Saden me alot.Sometimes as the saying goes --- if you love someone,let him go. :P

Funny thing that happen to me in my 1st love,same thing. After 5 yrs relationship with my bi-bf.He wanted to get married and no contact with me at all.What to do---if you love someone,let him go :P

Even if I don't, what do I gain? He will be happy with his wife.And I,lonely,sad and despressed.For 5 yrs,we didn't quarel at all.Not untill the day,He sad he wanted to get married.

My mother once told me,son,if everyone is like you then in this world,there would be no enemy.I

I would like to know more HIV+ singles or couples out there.How are you guys coping about life and love.Thanks.

Thanks again for the love and concern from you guys,I can feel it. :P

Dear HIV+, it need a brave and strong soul to go on 6 yrs plus. thanks for sharing ur encounters with us.

**hug**

For me, i think death will be coming sooner or later in our part of life. but the matter is how is it happen to us. But the important matter in life is, are u happy with ur own life?

Just see ur posting, i think u are open minded person

My mother once told me,son,if everyone is like you then in this world,there would be no enemy

anyway, wish u gd luck. Hope u and ur bf happy living.

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Guest fucked raw years ago

I have 2 encounters of raw sex a few years ago.

First incident

The top was fxxking me with condom in the doggie position. Somehow when he cummed and was about to withdraw his cock, I felt his cock and found that there was no condom on his cock. He must be very quickly withdrawn his cock from my asshole and removed the condom, and reinserted his cock into me.

Second incident.

The top wanted to fxxk me raw. I said no. We ended up in the missionary position, and he positioned his cock at my asshole entrance. I said "don't fxxk me raw". He said "don't worry, i am not going to enter you". Then his cock kept teasing my asshole entrance, and suddenly he thrusted himself raw into me.

It was my mistake. I was too horny to push him away when he thrusted his cock raw into me.

Just sharing.

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Guest mentosss

HIV+

if u dont take medication, does ur CD4 counts drop? what i heard is that AZT medication is so powerful it actually kills a person slowly and not the hiv virus...true or myth im not sure.

the period whereby u did not take any medication, do u feel sick more often? what kind of sickness? flu? fever often?

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Hi mentoss, sori can't help you much with yr questions cus I am not taking medication yet. As for CD4, it depends on cus everyone immune system is not the same.I have a frd who is HIV+ for 10 yrs without medications but his CD4 is still very good.Hope I can be like him too.Cheers! :P

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Hi mentoss, sori can't help you much with yr questions cus I am not taking medication yet. As for CD4, it depends on cus everyone immune system is not the same.I have a frd who is HIV+ for 10 yrs without medications but his CD4 is still very good.Hope I can be like him too.Cheers! :P

Hi HIV+,

In this case, why you consider taking medicine now? Because of CD4 or??

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