Single & Living Alone Discussion (compiled)

[Guest Guest]

I hang up my own paintings. Trying to buy more plants and maybe buy some flowers every sunday.

[darkflame]

I left Singapore to work overseas so I'm living alone currently.

I juggle my time between housework, cooking, gym and swim.

I have hardly free time as I knock out by 11 and get up at 6.

On the weekends, it's housework, gym and swim, and before I know it, the weekend is gone.

Sometimes it becomes one giant timetable that I get tired.

Only during public holidays do I get to truly relax.

This may be a sort of prelude to how I would live alone back in Singapore in the decades to come.

I may even have to be warded for OCD.

[Guest Guest]

I left Singapore to work overseas so I'm living alone currently.

I juggle my time between housework, cooking, gym and swim.

I have hardly free time as I knock out by 11 and get up at 6.

On the weekends, it's housework, gym and swim, and before I know it, the weekend is gone.

Sometimes it becomes one giant timetable that I get tired.

Only during public holidays do I get to truly relax.

This may be a sort of prelude to how I would live alone back in Singapore in the decades to come.

I may even have to be warded for OCD.

So u.going to do the same until u old n.die? Pretty sad life for us.

[Guest Truth]

I left Singapore to work overseas so I'm living alone currently.

I juggle my time between housework, cooking, gym and swim.

I have hardly free time as I knock out by 11 and get up at 6.

On the weekends, it's housework, gym and swim, and before I know it, the weekend is gone.

Sometimes it becomes one giant timetable that I get tired.

Only during public holidays do I get to truly relax.

This may be a sort of prelude to how I would live alone back in Singapore in the decades to come.

I may even have to be warded for OCD.

Sound quite mundane.  Life is short, enjoy in whatever time is available and live like human flushed with colors, love and vibrants.  Don't wake up one day and realised all those years of youth suddently dissappear  and you are left with nothing but ailments, lonesome for the remaining life span.

Work is good, it keeps you occupied but don't overwork because nobody in this world will appreciate the effort of yours to work late, stay long hours and sweat.  Your boss will get the credit, their children will inherit those richness without much effort. You will end up in high blood pressure and lead a lonely life thereafter when they decided that you are redundant and and no longer needed in the company. By the time you are free to enjoy life, you ended up doing workout among those old uncles and aunties in the neighbourhood void-deck. 

[darkflame]

Sound quite mundane. Life is short, enjoy in whatever time is available and live like human flushed with colors, love and vibrants. Don't wake up one day and realised all those years of youth suddently dissappear and you are left with nothing but ailments, lonesome for the remaining life span.

Work is good, it keeps you occupied but don't overwork because nobody in this world will appreciate the effort of yours to work late, stay long hours and sweat. Your boss will get the credit, their children will inherit those richness without much effort. You will end up in high blood pressure and lead a lonely life thereafter when they decided that you are redundant and and no longer needed in the company. By the time you are free to enjoy life, you ended up doing workout among those old uncles and aunties in the neighbourhood void-deck.

You sound like you went through it.

Too bad household chores are part and parcel of life.

I hope I don't end up like those crazy women who have too much housework that they end up ripping their own clothing in frustration during ironing.

[Guest Truth]

You sound like you went through it.

Too bad household chores are part and parcel of life.

I hope I don't end up like those crazy women who have too much housework that they end up ripping their own clothing in frustration during ironing.

I didn't went throught it, but I believed I have visited my dad in hospital long enough to see the despair and lonesome-ness that run through the eyes of many paitents, some single with no family and wanting out of the place but the nurse forbade them to leave.  There were others all wired up and groaned so loudly you can almost hear them few rooms again.  Once, I saw a lady tried to run away but was caught and she cried and struggled with the nurses that everyone in the ward has to mobilise to calm her down.  Hospital, is one place you wouldn't want to go.  It is not a flashback of memory, but flashfoward of what was about to come if we don't take care of ourselves.  In its spiritual sense, it is good in "go" quielty in your own bed with no burden than to lie in hospital waiting for time to come along with others......

 

In that moment of "enlightenment", I quitted my underpaid job from the most horrible boss I have ever encountered and spend time nursing my dad at home while holding part-time job.  I also started my jogging regime everyday.  That means, I am no longer rich but I get to smell roses everyday and watch dad recovering faster at home than in hospital. I also learn to gaze stars every night, wondering beyond life and death whether they will be next life or none at all?  All the more we began to treasure ourselves as gifted human beings, which is just once upon this time, in a billion year.     

[Guest Guest]

You sound like you went through it.

Too bad household chores are part and parcel of life.

I hope I don't end up like those crazy women who have too much housework that they end up ripping their own clothing in frustration during ironing.

You can rent out your rooms so that you have less to clean. If you are lucky, they may even help to do area cleaning.

[lego]

I just have a small apartment, so not much space anyways.

Good to chill w frens and usually I cook when they come over.

Else just play games, do some work and voila, u r another day older.

If anything, it's actually too easy to waste away time

[Guest Guest]

Living alone can become quite lonely at times. Good to have someone in the house.

[Guest Guest]

The bottom line is: What is your plan when you become old and alone? Sell your home and transfer to nursing home?

[Guest Guest]

I have plenty of things to entertain myself with each day. And that's just entertainment i.e. net, books, games, tv, cable, etc. You throw in more serious stuffs, work, exercise etc, honestly I find I don't have enough time daily.

 

So no, I've never been bored or lonely. And it is also a matter of how comfortable you are with yourself, and how you plan your days.

As for the qn of what happens when old liao. Here's the fallacy. Having a family, children, partner, doesn't ensure you get someone to look after you when old. You'd be quite surprised how many destitute elderly have children and spouses. Plan your finances properly. Hire a helper, move to a nursing home, adjust yourself to the needs of the day, there are sensible arrangements for end days. As long as you adjust to it, you can ends up like everyone else in your final days. Alone or not.

[Guest Ener]

My godpa use to live alone life was quite boring for him until I moved in with him.. Now it's more exciting for him, I help to mess up the hse and he gets to clean it up. Then he gets to exercise his vocals more by screaming at me. See... Win win situation.

[Guest Fatty]

You can rent out your rooms so that you have less to clean. If you are lucky, they may even help to do area cleaning.

Wait till you get a tenant from hell

[Guest Natural]

The bottom line is: What is your plan when you become old and alone? Sell your home and transfer to nursing home?

NO, No!  Clean up or emptied your home, put on your best dress, light aroma candle, daunt your home with many roses and beautiful flowers, donate all your stuffs to salvation army, send your last message in BW, hold a religious book, dream of your lover waiting for you...and lay down quietly.  No pain, just natural. 

[Guest Landlord-to-be]

Wait till you get a tenant from hell

Oh dear, I was toying the idea of renting out one common room. Now you scared me, can you please elaborate a little bit more?

[Guest chit]

Living alone can become quite lonely at times. Good to have someone in the house.

True, but location also played an important factor. If you stay in ulu places as compared to more vibrant central district, than when the sunset, the sinking feeling will also appear. It is good to stay near those 24 hour coffee shops, where you can grab a coffee anytime even at 3am.

[Guest Oatmeal - smooth and cream]

I buy lots of records and listen music everyday

[darkflame]

NO, No! Clean up or emptied your home, put on your best dress, light aroma candle, daunt your home with many roses and beautiful flowers, donate all your stuffs to salvation army, send your last message in BW, hold a religious book, dream of your lover waiting for you...and lay down quietly. No pain, just natural.

This sounds like your very last day on earth, with some emo band playing in the background.

[bluerunner]

The bottom line is: What is your plan when you become old and alone? Sell your home and transfer to nursing home?

That's what I have in mind.

[Guest I M your neighbour]

Frankly speaking, I am lucky to own a 3-room HDB many years ago. If I don't have a HDB, I won't have a life. Here is my story against all odds:-

 

 

My parents won't want me to stay with them, my siblings felt uncomfortable with me squeezing in the same house because it was theirs. My so-called closed friends wanted to charge me high rental for renting a room,  I have no close relative.

 

 

Than I nearly fall for a guy whom I didn't love, so that I can join name with him for a HDB flat but he get to choose a location far far from my work place. During that time, I was still not eligble because of my age.  Than I went to Changi airport to sleep because I worked in Changi and to get away from naggy family members.  I went through all the obstacles and trauma, Than I worked hard for a purpose, save enough for the deposit and immediatey apply for HDB flat the moment I hit 35.

 

 

When HDB handed me the key and both me and the old landlard signed the document of transfer,  I was shivering with joy  The staff witnessed how excited I was and she was all in smile and polite.  I grabbed the key, run to my newly bought home, opened the door for the first time and saw my dream finally come true.

 

 

With limited budget, I bought my furniture from 2nd hand shop, painted my house pink and put on as much lamps and lighting to create warmth in my minimalist layout.  My first simple house warming was not very eventful. Friends who wanted to charge me high rental didn’t turn up and those who turned up makes a lot of criticism about me not having a big bed, no air-con and start giving their opinion as though I have all the funds to take their suggestion. Family turned up, they thought I wasted a lot of money on my home, they didn’t eat and left.

 

 

However I was treated, I felt good to have a home, to be myself and doing my own thing.  I was hesitant about renting out a room eventhough I am poor. This is because psychologically speaking, it was like giving up a part of my space which I have created for myself. I didn’t want to give up anything I worked hard for, if I have not quite explained the journey I’ve been through….

 

 

Than, I was blessed, the government selected my block for Home Improvement Programme.  I get to have my 2 dirty bathrooms (used by previous owner) fully renovated among many others features at extremely low fee.  I have a new door and gate being replaced under that scheme too. 

 

 

Am I afraid to stay alone and feel bored? The answer is clearly written in my story, NO! it was a tremendous joy, an achievement and finally FREEDOM!

 

[Guest Guest]

Frankly speaking, I am lucky to own a 3-room HDB many years ago. If I don't have a HDB, I won't have a life. Here is my story against all odds:-

My parents won't want me to stay with them, my siblings felt uncomfortable with me squeezing in the same house because it was theirs. My so-called closed friends wanted to charge me high rental for renting a room, I have no close relative.

Than I nearly fall for a guy whom I didn't love, so that I can join name with him for a HDB flat but he get to choose a location far far from my work place. During that time, I was still not eligble because of my age. Than I went to Changi airport to sleep because I worked in Changi and to get away from naggy family members. I went through all the obstacles and trauma, Than I worked hard for a purpose, save enough for the deposit and immediatey apply for HDB flat the moment I hit 35.

When HDB handed me the key and both me and the old landlard signed the document of transfer, I was shivering with joy The staff witnessed how excited I was and she was all in smile and polite. I grabbed the key, run to my newly bought home, opened the door for the first time and saw my dream finally come true.

With limited budget, I bought my furniture from 2nd hand shop, painted my house pink and put on as much lamps and lighting to create warmth in my minimalist layout. My first simple house warming was not very eventful. Friends who wanted to charge me high rental didn’t turn up and those who turned up makes a lot of criticism about me not having a big bed, no air-con and start giving their opinion as though I have all the funds to take their suggestion. Family turned up, they thought I wasted a lot of money on my home, they didn’t eat and left.

However I was treated, I felt good to have a home, to be myself and doing my own thing. I was hesitant about renting out a room eventhough I am poor. This is because psychologically speaking, it was like giving up a part of my space which I have created for myself. I didn’t want to give up anything I worked hard for, if I have not quite explained the journey I’ve been through….

Than, I was blessed, the government selected my block for Home Improvement Programme. I get to have my 2 dirty bathrooms (used by previous owner) fully renovated among many others features at extremely low fee. I have a new door and gate being replaced under that scheme too.

Am I afraid to stay alone and feel bored? The answer is clearly written in my story, NO! it was a tremendous joy, an achievement and finally FREEDOM!

A moving story. It's rare that your parents doesn't like you to stay with them. Usually, the single son will stay with and take care of his aged parents.

You can still enjoy the freedom being alone and doing things alone. But you also need to plan ahead for the next, said 20 to 30 years, when you are no longer agile and lost your mobility.

[Guest wozzit]

Whilst living with a committed partner is obviously the ideal most gays look for, there will almost certainly b times when we have to face up to being alone. Some guys can b perfectly comfortable on their own. Much depends I suggest on the friends u have. With good friends there is always something to do. If it happens none r free Id often go out for coffee n just people watch, take in a movie or a concert, plan a long weekend somewhere or just collapse on the sofa n read.

 

Sorry didnt read the thread title closely. Im not alone now but have been several times.

Edited September 2, 2015 by wozzit

[HydroNaut]

I guess for me.... it will be a MJ club for me to gather my friends over for a game of mj....then maybe then organized a short trip over to JB for a smoothing massage after the game and have a sumptuous dinner there before heading back for another few rounds of MJ.

[youngpunk]

i'm happily living on my own and happily keeping all rooms to myself.  i guess being an introvert helps...seldom a lonely moment....except when i'm sick. 

[bigdanbeam]

i'm happily living on my own and happily keeping all rooms to myself. i guess being an introvert helps...seldom a lonely moment....except when i'm sick.

High 5. But not agreeing on the sick part. I recover fast alone

[Guest Lobster]

A moving story. It's rare that your parents doesn't like you to stay with them. Usually, the single son will stay with and take care of his aged parents.

You can still enjoy the freedom being alone and doing things alone. But you also need to plan ahead for the next, said 20 to 30 years, when you are no longer agile and lost your mobility.

Getting a home is a priority, than let the remaining journey fall into place on itself.  Without a home, many people will be wondering where to stay, watching their budget on renting, how to book hotel for fun sort of thing.

[Guest Guest]

Most guys here above 35 owned or planning to own a home. The next question is, who will be the next owner? Not likely your partner unless he is 10 years or more younger than you. Not likely your nephews or nieces unless they take care of you when you are old and sick.

Sell it and donate proceeds to Charity? Think about it before you become too old and lost the capability due to dementia like some old folks and get cheated.

[youngpunk]

Most guys here above 35 owned or planning to own a home. The next question is, who will be the next owner? Not likely your partner unless he is 10 years or more younger than you. Not likely your nephews or nieces unless they take care of you when you are old and sick.

Sell it and donate proceeds to Charity? Think about it before you become too old and lost the capability due to dementia like some old folks and get cheated.

So many assumptions in one single post. Whoa~

[cutejack]

...

Edited September 4, 2015 by cutejack

[cutejack]

Most guys here above 35 owned or planning to own a home. The next question is, who will be the next owner? Not likely your partner unless he is 10 years or more younger than you. Not likely your nephews or nieces unless they take care of you when you are old and sick.

Sell it and donate proceeds to Charity? Think about it before you become too old and lost the capability due to dementia like some old folks and get cheated.

i started to think exactly wat u havr mentioned.

great mind think alike.

[cutejack]

So many assumptions in one single post. Whoa~

Not assumption.plan?

Edited September 4, 2015 by cutejack

[Guest Guest]

i started to think exactly wat u havr mentioned.

great mind think alike.

 

maybe sell the property, use the money pump into old folk home mthly fee till i die.

[Guest Guest]

Most guys here above 35 owned or planning to own a home. The next question is, who will be the next owner? Not likely your partner unless he is 10 years or more youn200ger than you. Not likely your nephews or nieces unless they take care of you when you are old and sick.

Sell it and donate proceeds to Charity? Think about it before you become too old and lost the capability due to dementia like some old folks and get cheated.

Make a will and give the money and property to the one who will take care of you till you die ,be it a maid , partner , young or old just like the teacher who leave it all for the maid for took good care of her !

[Guest Opined]

Make a will and give the money and property to the one who will take care of you till you die ,be it a maid , partner , young or old just like the teacher who leave it all for the maid for took good care of her !

It depends whether it is private property or HDB. I do know that the money from HDB will go back to your CPF and thereafter depend on the will of your CPF how you wanted it distributed.

 

Most people with brothers or sister will certainly get the share. As for lover it can be subjective. I do know of a friend who write 25% of his CPF as will to his lover, the other 75% share among the siblings.  It is a fair arrangement because none lose out. However, it is also a case by case scenario.  You lover who walked the journey with you till your last day probably should deserve more than your bro/sis who has wife/husband/kids to look after them when they are old.  As for your lover, once you are gone, his life is alone.  This is my passionate opinion.  On the other hand, it is too prematured to make rash decision when you just started out. Let matter take its course until your body start to show sign of deteriorating, than time to plan for your bf. Most importantly, share your decision with your other close family members, to avoid subsequent dispute.

[mamamia]

Any potential of him become a "permanent" resident eventually? Not just about low rental. Or it is simply purely friendship and no loveship?

We are just friends only ... We can never have the chemistry coz we are neither each other type.

[Guest GUEST]

how come the old never thought of donating to BW ? They keep u company day and nite and when u are bored u speak to BW.

[youngpunk]

Not assumption.plan?

 

 

haha, yah, don't get me wrong, planning is very important, but the earlier reply was full of assumpions which is actually counterproductive to planning.  like one of the guests shared above, planning or preparing a will should start early, and not to assume that all would live to old age, and properties are just part of a person's overall assets, doesn't have to limit thinking into partners, nephews, etc. etc.

[Guest Marry Me]

how come the old never thought of donating to BW ? They keep u company day and nite and when u are bored u speak to BW.

BW is not an entity, it is a place where bitches roam free.  Now back to the topic shall we?

 

When mindef say rifle is our wife.  I would say HDB is our wife, especially for singles. Otherwise, what else do we have for us to call home, sleep, eat, shit, sex, rest, maintain, walk naked, cry, throw tantrum, sing, dance and make funny faces and even talked alone,  you name it, it provided it.

[Guest Book-keeper]

I am planning to apply for HDB business licence next month to run a small freelance business. Haven't think of company name yet. I might consider doing book-keeping.  Any name that sound special?

[Guest Aging]

As years passes, it slowly became a reality if we haven't found the love ones.......

[Guest Guest]

So the most important thing to do now is to take care of your health.  Some old folks still can jog or brisk walk at 80.

 

Otherwise, you will end up at the nursing home by the time you hit 60.

[Guest Aging]

So the most important thing to do now is to take care of your health.  Some old folks still can jog or brisk walk at 80.

 

Otherwise, you will end up at the nursing home by the time you hit 60.

True, but currently staying alone and my own home is equivallent to my nursing home now less the caregiver.  Single gay life is quite bored, issn't it?

[mith]

already prepare for it, and happy about it.

[Guest Fatty]

What to do? I'm short, fat, fugly and worst of all, poor.

誰來愛我?

[Baby Face]

I am enjoying my life to the fullest. I gym often and work during week days. I go jb to watch movie, shop, massage and makan during off day. Even tho, I am go jb alone but I don't feel it as there are vibrant of ppl around on the street to accompany me. I would gym and going out around to take photo during weekend. If not, I would slack on the bed watch tv program and surf the net.

[Guest Aging]

I am enjoying my life to the fullest. I gym often and work during week days. I go jb to watch movie, shop, massage and makan during off day. Even tho, I am go jb alone but I don't feel it as there are vibrant of ppl around on the street to accompany me. I would gym and going out around to take photo during weekend. If not, I would slack on the bed watch tv program and surf the net.

All these are temporal, it will come a time you may no longer do all these things when reality set in. I was doing what you did in the past but now......

[Guest lonelyheartclub]

I have gotten used to the idea so it no longer bothers me. So what if I am single fat ugly gay with no bf or friends, what is important I am happy with my life.

[hairy springroll]

Yesi am prepared for it

Happy and ready

[onlylonely]

Slack at home everyday quite shiok..do some exercise..

[Baby Face]

All these are temporal, it will come a time you may no longer do all these things when reality set in. I was doing what you did in the past but now......

Aging come in different way. It depend how ready you are. Why bother now while I am still healthy and physically fit? It will be another growing curve when the time come.