Disappearing act, my story

[oralb]

i can only say that by now, everyone has chipped in to give you an likely explanation. 

 

Is it the truth? you will never know (unless one of the member that replied IS that guy and he gave his reason). you can choose one that's the most acceptable and move on.

 

Somethings life work in such a manner, there will be no proper closure and you have to live with it.

 

Time will heal. Give time some time to slowly washed the memories away. Take it like a teenage puppy love that didnt work out.

[bot4life]

Thank you all for sharing your thoughts and showing your concerns to me. I have put this behind and moved on.

[Guest manlybi]

this is my guess only

 

1. he lost his phone, and dun remember yr number

2. he is married, and feel guilty and stop it

3. he sex with other guy and feel regret and block all the guys he talked before

[bigdanbeam]

6 hours ago, bot4life said:

Thank you all for sharing your thoughts and showing your concerns to me. I have put this behind and moved on.

 

That was pretty quick. well done!

[Guest]

It happened to me before. We were dating and had frequent sex. After a few months, suddenly he blocked me! I guessed he only wanted sex. Even though he always said I was his type but he wanted his freedom to meet more men.

 

I simply smiled and moved on. I think it's my fault to keep praising him as handsome, good looking and so he thought too highly of himself. I merely wanted to give him positive strokes. Actually when I saw his profiles on the apps, he actually has a dumb smile and plain looking.

 

The irony is that he still keep reading my profiles on the apps because he liked my body. I know he's trying to hint to me that he still want sex with me. After being exposed to the gay apps, he found out that his true market value is not what he thought it was. I simply ignored him.

[Clickclock]

no matter what the reason is, i think its simply rude to leave a person hanging. I too experienced a situation where someone asked me out and we were talking and all but he blocked me immediately after I told him to know me more as a person first before calling me 'dear'. That first few days after being blocked unknowingly really eats you up inside, confusion, frustration, acceptance and then relief.

[bot4life]

44 minutes ago, Clickclock said:

no matter what the reason is, i think its simply rude to leave a person hanging. I too experienced a situation where someone asked me out and we were talking and all but he blocked me immediately after I told him to know me more as a person first before calling me 'dear'. That first few days after being blocked unknowingly really eats you up inside, confusion, frustration, acceptance and then relief.

 

This is exactly what I am going through. I am at the acceptance phase now, not much of a relief but i am getting there

[bot4life]

29 minutes ago, nogun said:

He did not let u know where he live is obvious a tell tales sign..he sounds like a player,charming with words,but his actions reveal his true nature..best u can do  dun waste time on him find better guy..people who meet on gay aspps usually got sex on their mind..dun be fool by their words of sweet talk..when they cannot get sex from u they will move on find another prey..

 

This probably true. I met some guys from the app before and I knew what they were truly looking for.

[micjean]

Jiayous!

[Guest manlybi]

yup

those from the gay apps mainly seek instant sex,  they will disappear or block you if they think it is too tedious or time consuming just to have sex with you,

also many claim they are married and bored,  or curious or new, are not real,  one has to check it out

we tend to easily believe what other people told us,  please change yr mindset now,  

[Guest]

You will.not.know.somebody till you have been with them.for at least a year. People.fake.it.all.the time. The care and honesty blehhhhh, all can be faked!!! Anyway, he has shown u his true colours.so fuck.him and.move on. It hurts i know but dont be hurting over a cunt who just drops u like a hot potato without any rhyme or reason!! At.least its.only been a.month!! U r still young. Get out there and date other more deserving guys!!! 

[kingbitch]

 

18 hours ago, bot4life said:

Thank you all for sharing your thoughts and showing your concerns to me. I have put this behind and moved on.

 

Sorry to hear this happened, and I'm very impressed it took you a day to feel strong enough to announce you are moving on.

 

Most of the rest of us - myself included - would be moping around longer.

 

Disappearing acts occur all the time to everyone in our instantaneous internet/app age, from platonic social circles to sex encounters. It sucks but it's life. Happened to me, happened to my date. May you find a much better guy very soon.

[teatree]

Be very clear what both of you wanted. Don't assume. He will back out if you start getting serious when all he wanted is a regular sex buddy.

[bot4life]

3 hours ago, manlybi said:

yup

those from the gay apps mainly seek instant sex,  they will disappear or block you if they think it is too tedious or time consuming just to have sex with you,

also many claim they are married and bored,  or curious or new, are not real,  one has to check it out

we tend to easily believe what other people told us,  please change yr mindset now,  

 

I will start to become more skeptical from now on. I know it sounds bad but it is good for me, or anyone else for that matter. People have become less trust worthy nowadays

[bot4life]

3 hours ago, Guest said:

You will.not.know.somebody till you have been with them.for at least a year. People.fake.it.all.the time. The care and honesty blehhhhh, all can be faked!!! Anyway, he has shown u his true colours.so fuck.him and.move on. It hurts i know but dont be hurting over a cunt who just drops u like a hot potato without any rhyme or reason!! At.least its.only been a.month!! U r still young. Get out there and date other more deserving guys!!! 

 

Hmm, I wont get angry over him or hate him. I think everyone has the right to choose to stop a relationship even though the way he chose to do it was hurtful. However, all that he has shown me, given me before, I cannot turn around and become ungrateful. After all, things have always been good until he disappeared. If things have to end this way, I will just accept it and I will keep the things happened between us as good memories. Recalling them can make me smile and feel a bit sad at the same time, but I can live with it. It takes time to forget someone, but at least I feel much better now.

 

Whatever the reason might be, I respect his decision by thinking that, some day, some time, if I were to be in a situation like his, and I wanna back out, I may understand his action even though I may think that I will not hurt anyone like the way he did to me.

[bot4life]

1 hour ago, kingbitch said:

 

 

Sorry to hear this happened, and I'm very impressed it took you a day to feel strong enough to announce you are moving on.

 

Most of the rest of us - myself included - would be moping around longer.

 

Disappearing acts occur all the time to everyone in our instantaneous internet/app age, from platonic social circles to sex encounters. It sucks but it's life. Happened to me, happened to my date. May you find a much better guy very soon.

 

Hmm, I am still thinking about him once in a while, or I start seeing the flashbacks whenever I am at a place where he and I have been to. But well, its part of moving on, and I know I need some time to gradually think less about him. What matters is I can carry on with my life and my tasks as per normal now

[bot4life]

36 minutes ago, teatree said:

Be very clear what both of you wanted. Don't assume. He will back out if you start getting serious when all he wanted is a regular sex buddy.

 

I think he and I were very clear on what we want. I dont think sex is the reason for his disappearing act. But then again, you can tell me that, one can hide his true intention very well. I am done speculating liao, no point

[kingbitch]

27 minutes ago, bot4life said:

 

Hmm, I am still thinking about him once in a while, or I start seeing the flashbacks whenever I am at a place where he and I have been to. But well, its part of moving on, and I know I need some time to gradually think less about him. What matters is I can carry on with my life and my tasks as per normal now

 

It took my one month each to get over my two strongest unrequited affections. Many of my friends take over a year. I think you're doing a fantastic job buddy.

[FirsTimer]

I think you can start by forcing a laugh. Laughing kills all elocution, that drop in ego might guarantee you an approval in accepting it. Haha

[dreamerboy]

I feel your pain. We must all necessarily be as clueless as you since none of us really know what happened. All are just possibilities based on certain assumptions. However, on a side note this reminds me of Xiao Long Nu, who disappeared from Yang Guo many times JUST LIKE THAT. Gone...with her own reasons...Just saying...it could be anything and everyone else can only guess blindly unless we know the other party. 

[justanotherme]

He is good at acting, so good that you didnt see through him. He tried to lay you, and when he didn't get what he wanted, he left. What is the point of finding out? To hurt yourself again? So what if he were to contact you again and come up of loads of excuses to coax you into sex? Would it end well? If he doesn't know how to cherish you, let him go.

 

[Guest]

It could be possible that he is still in the closet. But having gotten so close to you he might have been found out by family members, most like parents? 

 

So maybe as much as he didn't want to, he still decided to go back into the closet due to the fear of hurting his parents, hurting you, hurting himself. Fear often lead people to do irrational things, he probably wasn't ready to brave any changes that might take place by being with you. 

 

[bot4life]

10 hours ago, dreamerboy said:

I feel your pain. We must all necessarily be as clueless as you since none of us really know what happened. All are just possibilities based on certain assumptions. However, on a side note this reminds me of Xiao Long Nu, who disappeared from Yang Guo many times JUST LIKE THAT. Gone...with her own reasons...Just saying...it could be anything and everyone else can only guess blindly unless we know the other party. 

 

Thanks for sharing with me man. I have learned to accept the truth and given up on thinking about the possibilities

[bot4life]

9 hours ago, justanotherme said:

He is good at acting, so good that you didnt see through him. He tried to lay you, and when he didn't get what he wanted, he left. What is the point of finding out? To hurt yourself again? So what if he were to contact you again and come up of loads of excuses to coax you into sex? Would it end well? If he doesn't know how to cherish you, let him go.

 

 

I chose not to think of him in a negative way. I myself also dont know the reason, but i choose not to blame the person on bad things. I know it makes things easier for me to move on if I become hateful towards the person, but I dont wanna do it

[bot4life]

9 hours ago, Guest said:

It could be possible that he is still in the closet. But having gotten so close to you he might have been found out by family members, most like parents? 

 

So maybe as much as he didn't want to, he still decided to go back into the closet due to the fear of hurting his parents, hurting you, hurting himself. Fear often lead people to do irrational things, he probably wasn't ready to brave any changes that might take place by being with you. 

 

 

this thought actually comforts me. Thanks man.

[Guest]

maybe he strike first prize and change number to avoid unneccessary call.

 

[ChiSquare]

It's very painful to be left hanging without answers. 

I went through that. It was mind and heart breaking. 

Perhaps I only have myself to blame.

However I feel that regardless whos in fault and how bad the situation is, its definitely good to have a proper clear closure. 

I am not even sure if I can put it behind completely and move on. 

Its more likely that it will be an un-welcomed memory (not knowing whats the reason) that I will bring to my deathbed. 

Edited March 5, 2016 by ChiSquare

[snowball]

不是所有的故事都有圆满的结局，没有答案也是另一种答案，很多时候，无法获得的，事实上在回忆中已经终身难忘，每个人都是过客，只是彼此经过，没有遗憾，因为曾拥有，它可以让你失意后懂得如何保护更爱自己和他人，加油吧。

[Guest]

have message him few times with a hi. HE cant be bother to reply back. Now  after a  few months he say Hi to me , Should i give him back the treatment by not saying Hi  back to him.A lesson to him for neglecting me  and now he want me back  maybe after some bad experience in his  new affair with another guy.He done it once disappear all of a sudden , will he do it again?

[kaze]

On 4/5/2016 at 7:51 AM, Guest said:

have message him few times with a hi. HE cant be bother to reply back. Now  after a  few months he say Hi to me , Should i give him back the treatment by not saying Hi  back to him.A lesson to him for neglecting me  and now he want me back  maybe after some bad experience in his  new affair with another guy.He done it once disappear all of a sudden , will he do it again?

 

i'm a firm believer of not turning back for guys that was missed. things happen for a reason. it didn't happen due to accident cuz if it is, he would have explained immediately or asap. next, if it can happen once, what's stopping the second.. third.. so on so forth.. but then... this is just my own belief..

[fab]

I dated a guy for 6 mths. He left for attachment oversea for 2 yrs. He mia after 1 mth later. About 6 mths later, i found out through a few persons that he was attached all the while n i was one of the many third parties he was seeing.

 

[hairy springroll]

Just have to be strong n move on

As time goes by

we get better

[GuyBedok]

Hey i have this same situation too. It took me a 1 year for me to move onn from him . And yea till now i don't know his reason why he left me hanging without saying any word 

[Firday]

On 5/8/2016 at 2:29 PM, GuyBedok said:

Hey i have this same situation too. It took me a 1 year for me to move onn from him . And yea till now i don't know his reason why he left me hanging without saying any word 

sometime is best to left unspoken.....

at least you can find alot of reason for yourself eg hiv,left country,terminal illness etc...

 

encounter a few until numb about asking it....

 

 

 

 

[riverrobles]

Guilty of doing this when I was  young, to my girlfriend in university, that was the time I was slowly accepting myself as a gay guy.  Left her hanging without telling her what we'll do after finishing university, I took an internship in a different city , no Facebook yet, no WhatsApp, so she sent me a letter, snail mail to explain what happened. I still have that letter as a reminder how I bad I could hurt someone and be disappointed on my behavior. I'm a good person , my only wrong was I choose not to tell her I'm gay.

 

I will not do the disappearing act again and it only makes it difficult for both parties, especially if you have a real status as partners not just fuckbuddies.

 

@bot4life for the so-called desaparecido, still please give him time to explain , we really won't know what is the reason he disappeared, it would only be coming from him. Full worrying, speculating, self sabotage could lead to a mental disorder hence kudos to you that you've moved on quick.

 

 

[Guest dazza1202]

On 7/15/2018 at 12:14 PM, riverrobles said:

Guilty of doing this when I was  young, to my girlfriend in university, that was the time I was slowly accepting myself as a gay guy.  Left her hanging without telling her what we'll do after finishing university, I took an internship in a different city , no Facebook yet, no WhatsApp, so she sent me a letter, snail mail to explain what happened. I still have that letter as a reminder how I bad I could hurt someone and be disappointed on my behavior. I'm a good person , my only wrong was I choose not to tell her I'm gay.

 

I will not do the disappearing act again and it only makes it difficult for both parties, especially if you have a real status as partners not just fuckbuddies.

 

@bot4life for the so-called desaparecido, still please give him time to explain , we really won't know what is the reason he disappeared, it would only be coming from him. Full worrying, speculating, self sabotage could lead to a mental disorder hence kudos to you that you've moved on quick.

 

 

 

That could be in the late 70s.

[Guest Tyler nipples]

Botforlife is 27 year old now.

 

Shd have graduated from uni and found a job.

 

 

Wonder what actually happened to the now 33 year old disappearing act-or?

 

Did he ever return?

To explain his sudden MIA act?

Did Botforlife become wiser after that experience?

Is he still a BOT for life?

 

So many unanswered questions.

 

 

[fab]

On 1/23/2020 at 7:07 AM, Guest Tyler nipples said:

Botforlife is 27 year old now.

 

Shd have graduated from uni and found a job.

 

 

Wonder what actually happened to the now 33 year old disappearing act-or?

 

Did he ever return?

To explain his sudden MIA act?

Did Botforlife become wiser after that experience?

Is he still a BOT for life?

 

So many unanswered questions.

 

 

 

May have become boredforlife now.

 

Optimistically 且留意下回继续收看。 MDC subsequent season sometimes returns years later. Do notice he too has Mia from bw for 2 yrs.

 

Realistically

有些事情你现在不必问

有些人你永远不必等