treebottom Posted May 28, 2016 Report Share Posted May 28, 2016 I've notice a guy quite sometime , i guess he might be gay but not very sure , cause i try to add his wechat but he didn't accept my friend request .. We don't know each other so far , just want to make friend and know more about him but not for sex . So , do you guys have any idea that i can approach him ? Or i can just ask whether he is gay or not ? Is it rude to ask someone about their sexual orientation .. ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Fatty Posted May 28, 2016 Report Share Posted May 28, 2016 "Pssst..... ASGM?" bluefish20008 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Hot Swimmer Posted May 28, 2016 Report Share Posted May 28, 2016 Just tell him you like him simple like that. If you look and feel troubled by you. You will know he is not gay. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treebottom Posted May 28, 2016 Author Report Share Posted May 28, 2016 hot swimmer , I've ready to do this last week , unfortunately, he is going for vacation last week so that i can't talk to him . He is back now but i seems no courage to do that again... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ZealousZeno Posted May 28, 2016 Report Share Posted May 28, 2016 Well its all about courage though. Just have a casual chat with him when you actually cross path with him, (in the lift, bus or etc). Sense his tone and proceed to ask more personal qns after you build a rapport with him. Is all about having the balls to do it though, its hard even for me at face lvl. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KENZ Posted May 29, 2016 Report Share Posted May 29, 2016 May I suggest that it is better for you to take things slow. Don't rush into things, the repercussions may be more than you can handle. If he is not gay or he rejects your advances, no big deal, but what happens if he starts to tell others about it, you may be alienated by others. Furthermore you will face each other daily. Try using miss connections in BW or Trevvy first, if he is gay, most likely he will check out such websites. By taking things slow, Sometimes your own feelings of infatuation will for no reason die off over time too, also give you more time to know this person better. ZealousZeno and ChenL 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted May 29, 2016 Report Share Posted May 29, 2016 7 hours ago, Guest Fatty said: "Pssst..... ASGM?" I am gay and I don't even know what talking you... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treebottom Posted May 29, 2016 Author Report Share Posted May 29, 2016 ZealousZeno , I think he is introvert as i stare at him , i can't even have time to respond then he look away .. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kimochi Posted May 29, 2016 Report Share Posted May 29, 2016 Then it means he also has some fondness of u. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ZealousZeno Posted May 29, 2016 Report Share Posted May 29, 2016 15 minutes ago, matthewlimcheehong said: ZealousZeno , I think he is introvert as i stare at him , i can't even have time to respond then he look away .. Haha thats a challenge, introverts seldom kick start topics, for this u need to be initiative. Strike a hi-bye situation and progressively chat more as time pass. (You will know his interest in you by then) I did agree with kenz on the risk if you go all out instantly so play it slow ~ Good luck, waiting around ain't gonna get ya anywhere. KENZ 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
darkflame Posted May 29, 2016 Report Share Posted May 29, 2016 Most common solutions proposed on this forum so far is to start the ball rolling by talking to him as a friend, before moving on to talk about lgbt stuff like perhaps Pink Dot. If he's receptive about these stuff, you have a good chance. But if he's non-chalant or quite negative, it's better to stop at that. I'm always running after you. You are my ideal. You are me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J0Boo Posted May 29, 2016 Report Share Posted May 29, 2016 If you're afraid to talk to him, maybe you can buy some mini snacks and share with him? Then while eating you can start the convo? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
youngandfhorny Posted May 29, 2016 Report Share Posted May 29, 2016 Yeah it's better to start talking as friends first. You can start by asking a question regarding something you both have in common or something. Or start by acknowledging him like smiling at him and slowly build up your courage haha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Advisor Posted May 29, 2016 Report Share Posted May 29, 2016 Make casual conversation first for a kick start. Ex: I always see you around, you stay around here too? Where are you from? I am from bla bla bla... (Remember to ask Question follow by an answer from yourself too.. Dont make him feel you are interrogating him..) Try to find common interest.. Like asking what do u do (ex:Engineer)? Oh i have frens is an Engineer tooo... i heard the work is damn stress.. let him speak more... whatever bullshit also can.. then try to create conversation from what he say.... Dont ever mention anything bout gay or lgbt... This will come naturally if the two of you click... I have few experience hitting on Guys im interested... the result is always exciting...its like An Adventure and Exploring someone you dunno.... hehe.... kingbitch 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treebottom Posted May 29, 2016 Author Report Share Posted May 29, 2016 Got it guys and thx all of you for the precious suggestions , if any news i will update here . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carpenter Posted May 30, 2016 Report Share Posted May 30, 2016 On 5/28/2016 at 8:50 PM, matthewlimcheehong said: I've notice a guy quite sometime , i guess he might be gay but not very sure , cause i try to add his wechat but he didn't accept my friend request .. We don't know each other so far , just want to make friend and know more about him but not for sex . So , do you guys have any idea that i can approach him ? Or i can just ask whether he is gay or not ? Is it rude to ask someone about their sexual orientation .. ? Maybe u should try adding his wechat again, but without profile that stating its u. You can confess to him with the greeting text. See if you get a reply n his reaction. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rotikawin Posted May 31, 2016 Report Share Posted May 31, 2016 Is he a colleague? If so please don't even bother. Move on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treebottom Posted June 3, 2016 Author Report Share Posted June 3, 2016 Carpenter, I ask if he is the guy that i met him daily in the bus , he said yes and add me as friend . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treebottom Posted June 3, 2016 Author Report Share Posted June 3, 2016 rotikawin , Not my colleague .. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kimochi Posted June 3, 2016 Report Share Posted June 3, 2016 Update outcome????? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carpenter Posted June 4, 2016 Report Share Posted June 4, 2016 On 6/3/2016 at 11:51 AM, matthewlimcheehong said: Carpenter, I ask if he is the guy that i met him daily in the bus , he said yes and add me as friend . Is that it? Soo, u revealed yourself to him? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treebottom Posted June 5, 2016 Author Report Share Posted June 5, 2016 (edited) 10 hours ago, Carpenter said: Is that it? Soo, u revealed yourself to him? nope , he said he never see me before ... I affirm that he see me before , maybe im look difference with picture.. Edited June 5, 2016 by matthewlimcheehong Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kimochi Posted June 5, 2016 Report Share Posted June 5, 2016 Updates pls~~~~ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Yes Posted June 5, 2016 Report Share Posted June 5, 2016 On 5/29/2016 at 0:49 PM, matthewlimcheehong said: ZealousZeno , I think he is introvert as i stare at him , i can't even have time to respond then he look away .. Did you smile at him? If he returned smile, it means he likes you, if he showed disgusted face than just forget it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carpenter Posted June 5, 2016 Report Share Posted June 5, 2016 1 hour ago, Guest Yes said: Did you smile at him? If he returned smile, it means he likes you, if he showed disgusted face than just forget it. Smile means being friendly, not liking people. I smile to elderly people when they walked past me doesnt mean i like them, that means im being polite. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treebottom Posted June 5, 2016 Author Report Share Posted June 5, 2016 8 hours ago, Kimochi said: Updates pls~~~~ Nothing news to update leh ... 6 hours ago, Guest Yes said: Did you smile at him? If he returned smile, it means he likes you, if he showed disgusted face than just forget it. Return smile may means nothing though..It's also a matter of courtesy .. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Neh Neh Posted June 6, 2016 Report Share Posted June 6, 2016 Hi TS So any attack plan aka approach strategy drafted yet? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest 20 cents Posted June 6, 2016 Report Share Posted June 6, 2016 19 hours ago, Carpenter said: Smile means being friendly, not liking people. I smile to elderly people when they walked past me doesnt mean i like them, that means im being polite. There is a diffference between smiling to straight people and gay people. In my years of experiences studying gay people, if they don't like you, they rolled their eyes and walked away. You can ask around gay people, they are very sensitive to people they like and they don't. If you are their type of guy, they will not bother a smile to give you false hope and misunderstood as liking. If you are their type, they will smile and hope to get some form of hint. For straight people, it is simply polite because you know straight people will not fall for gay people, so smiling is just a gesture and act of courtesy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fab Posted June 6, 2016 Report Share Posted June 6, 2016 22 minutes ago, Guest 20 cents said: There is a diffference between smiling to straight people and gay people. In my years of experiences studying gay people, if they don't like you, they rolled their eyes and walked away. You can ask around gay people, they are very sensitive to people they like and they don't. If you are their type of guy, they will not bother a smile to give you false hope and misunderstood as liking. If you are their type, they will smile and hope to get some form of hint. For straight people, it is simply polite because you know straight people will not fall for gay people, so smiling is just a gesture and act of courtesy. I disagree. I will still smile to someone out of courtesy regardless if i wanna bed him. 鍾意就好，理佢男定女 never argue with the guests. let them bark all they want. 结缘不结怨 解怨不解缘 After I have said what I wanna say, I don't care what you say. 看穿不说穿 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carpenter Posted June 6, 2016 Report Share Posted June 6, 2016 4 hours ago, Guest 20 cents said: There is a diffference between smiling to straight people and gay people. In my years of experiences studying gay people, if they don't like you, they rolled their eyes and walked away. You can ask around gay people, they are very sensitive to people they like and they don't. If you are their type of guy, they will not bother a smile to give you false hope and misunderstood as liking. If you are their type, they will smile and hope to get some form of hint. For straight people, it is simply polite because you know straight people will not fall for gay people, so smiling is just a gesture and act of courtesy. Ohhh, ive had people smiling to me from time to time, dont know if they are gay or not. N i also sometimes smile to people if im in good mood dont matter who they r. The thing is, they are individuals with different traits. Thats like making gay another species that exist. That means you r categorizing it into the same trait like you would when being ask about the stereotypical gays. Im sure some people just had a misfortune of meeting someone that would rolled their eyes to show disinterest. Do you do that rolling eyes yourself? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roflparadox Posted June 6, 2016 Report Share Posted June 6, 2016 maybe try to be more obvious with your actions! I didn't realise that my ex-bf liked me.. until he started walking me home daily for a few weeks. then it struck me ahhahaha. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carpenter Posted June 9, 2016 Report Share Posted June 9, 2016 Any update? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treebottom Posted June 10, 2016 Author Report Share Posted June 10, 2016 On Thursday, June 09, 2016 at 9:55 AM, Carpenter said: Any update? Hmm...He never initiate any conversation since he adding me as friend . But this monday night , i just update wechat profile picture , he text me initiately "why am i change so ugly picture(with a joking tone)?" on the next morning .Then blah blah blah , and he start to ask me where i met him , how i will noticed him etc. But i still in doubt as he won't text me initiately(except that day he ask me about my profile picture) even with a morning greeting , i'm always the one to start the conversation .... I think he is gay as it is can revealed from some point , but not sure whether he is interest in me or not? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lovehandle Posted June 10, 2016 Report Share Posted June 10, 2016 I joked w my friends if they put up strange or ugly photos too, ie very normal to me but if he moved on to ask how u notice him, it means that he s really thinking about this what is wrong w u starting the conv? being proactive if u wanna it , u hve to be proactive and do your homework and u r young I m old, I hve no energy to do that anymore to woo, I mean I advertised myself cheaply and no1 bothers Not sure anyone ans :your qn on whether ok to ask his orientation pls wait till u r more or less confirmed - he is a gay then u can approach by the way, a straight men will not out of nowhere ask to get to know another straight men, no way, Never! joining or get to know other gd players for their basketball-hangouts - yes possible definitely! but not those situations by now, he should know why do u need his no. ? Knowing doesn't mean Must respond Many told me that they nailed an interview, when the panel appeared interested and smiling to u that doesn't mean they are going to offer u however , luv is magical, hence do not use the yardstick of a professional wkplace as a love scenario, it s just for reference treebottom 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carpenter Posted June 10, 2016 Report Share Posted June 10, 2016 You know, how long have you been doing this morning greeting. I say keep this up, so he will notice. But once he does, drop it. Dont send out greetings for a while. you can be active at the start but also need to know what he think of you, thats why you need him to start the convo first. Well, if that didnt work out n he didnt even notice i say he just didnt thinking that far about u n presumably dont have anything to say. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treebottom Posted June 11, 2016 Author Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 13 hours ago, Carpenter said: You know, how long have you been doing this morning greeting. I say keep this up, so he will notice. But once he does, drop it. Dont send out greetings for a while. you can be active at the start but also need to know what he think of you, thats why you need him to start the convo first. Well, if that didnt work out n he didnt even notice i say he just didnt thinking that far about u n presumably dont have anything to say. I sent him morning greeting this morning but no reply , will he think im annoying if i keep doing this ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KENZ Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 You think about it, if a guy u like suddenly text you, you will be excited and will at least reply something back to keep the conversation going de, you will not keep quiet de, Just take it easy ba. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lovehandle Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 1 hour ago, matthewlimcheehong said: I sent him morning greeting this morning but no reply , will he think im annoying if i keep doing this ? Yes, I will be annoyed if after 3 times, I still hve not reply, I m really annoyed Sorry , but that s the truth Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treebottom Posted June 11, 2016 Author Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 Thx guys , i know what to do already .. luvhandle 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luvhandle Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 hope to hear more about your outcome too treebottom 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cutejack Posted June 12, 2016 Report Share Posted June 12, 2016 Ya.keen to hear yr bedroom story. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treebottom Posted June 28, 2016 Author Report Share Posted June 28, 2016 Oh well , here's the outcome .. He claimed that he is straight , but he don't mind to friend with a LGBT . Few minutes later text me again "don't wait for me , move on and look for another one , we can just be friend ." Hurt + warm + ultimately hurt . But it's ok , this is the way i chose , won't regret to make this decision . -THE END- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest :-( Posted June 28, 2016 Report Share Posted June 28, 2016 4 minutes ago, matthewlimcheehong said: Oh well , here's the outcome .. He claimed that he is straight , but he don't mind to friend with a LGBT . Few minutes later text me again "don't wait for me , move on and look for another one , we can just be friend ." Hurt + warm + ultimately hurt . But it's ok , this is the way i chose , won't regret to make this decision . -THE END- At least got conclusion. Go taboo and know more gays la, at least you don't have to waste so much time confirming if he's gay or straight. Most guys on the streets are straight anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dracula Posted June 28, 2016 Report Share Posted June 28, 2016 So sad, reality is often not favourable for our sides. Please don't dwell over it, I think nothing much can be done. And thanks for sharing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carpenter Posted June 28, 2016 Report Share Posted June 28, 2016 Actually, this is a happy ending of sorts. U at least know his answer. He still can be your friend, u can finally move on treebottom 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KENZ Posted June 29, 2016 Report Share Posted June 29, 2016 8 hours ago, matthewlimcheehong said: Oh well , here's the outcome .. He claimed that he is straight , but he don't mind to friend with a LGBT . Few minutes later text me again "don't wait for me , move on and look for another one , we can just be friend ." Hurt + warm + ultimately hurt . But it's ok , this is the way i chose , won't regret to make this decision . -THE END- Oh well just remain as friends better than nothing (hope he is sincere when he said don't mind to friend a LGBT) All is not lost, Remember this valuable lesson so that next time you know if a guy is really interested in you. In due time your feelings will fade for him too, there will be more people out there for you to make the special connection. Jiayou and cheer up treebottom 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cutejack Posted June 29, 2016 Report Share Posted June 29, 2016 Move on dude.dont worry one day if he is bored with gals he will look for u. anyway thx for sharing.tc Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fab Posted June 29, 2016 Report Share Posted June 29, 2016 Just to add on. Even if the guy is gay, it doesn't mean he must reciprocate the feeling of the admirer. treebottom 1 鍾意就好，理佢男定女 never argue with the guests. let them bark all they want. 结缘不结怨 解怨不解缘 After I have said what I wanna say, I don't care what you say. 看穿不说穿 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treebottom Posted June 29, 2016 Author Report Share Posted June 29, 2016 Alright . Hope this love can fades with time.. Cheers . KENZ 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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