Guest Anon Posted August 4, 2016 Report Share Posted August 4, 2016 Hey all, Being young, closeted and never having been in a relationship before, there are some things which makes me curious about what gay couples do vs when they are with their male (straight or gay) friends. Just a couple of days ago I was at the mall and I spotted a couple. To the oblivious general public they might look like very good friends, but I could see that their hands were sort of touching plus other telltale signs setting off my gaydar. Later I saw them later inside the toilet (no I did not stalk them), and they were peeing next to each other at the urinals when half of the urinals weren't even in use. As guys we kind of learned the golden rule to always leave a urinal empty when peeing next to another person when possible to avoid the awkwardness. This got me thinking, do social conventions between men not matter any more between two men in a relationship? Or perhaps because us guys went through army we are desensitized to "bro things" like peeing or showering together? Most of the things I know about relationships come from TV shows or movies, which is overwhelmingly dominated by portrayals of straight couples. I think even for straight couples, it is still very awkward for them to pee in front of each other despite having seen the other party naked during sex. There are also some things straight couples do. Acts of chivalry like the guy sending the girl back home, or helping to carry the girl's handbag. Do gay couples do similar things? Are gay couples just very good buddies who are also physically attracted to each other? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest :-( Posted August 4, 2016 Report Share Posted August 4, 2016 I am shy to let my bf see my penis when peeing at urinals but he always want to peep We don't practice sending each other home unless really nothing much to do, we are west and northeast apart Physically attracted and also good buddies as couple! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest 72%dark Posted August 6, 2016 Report Share Posted August 6, 2016 Hi TS, it's an interesting question. I think the short answer is that it really varies from couple to couple; each couple has its own relationship synergy that results from the individual personalities, idiosyncracies and qualms of the two people in it. In my own experience, the longer two people are in a relationship together, the more blasé and less squeamish they become about each other's bodily functions and other intimate boundaries that platonic friends would respect. In that respect I don't think gay couples differ that much from straight couples. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest 72%dark Posted August 6, 2016 Report Share Posted August 6, 2016 For gay couples, it's hard to think of a good analog for the example of a straight guy carrying his GF's handbag. Perhaps in gay LTRs, this type of 'role distinct' behavior is less publicly visible or more subtle. E.g in a gay couple where one partner earns much more than the other, the more well-off one may offer to shoulder the financial burdens of the couple, etc. Certainly I've never been involved with another guy who offered to carry my bag for me, and vice versa. But who knows, maybe another BW member has experiences of this sort? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
darkflame Posted August 6, 2016 Report Share Posted August 6, 2016 Acts of chivalry may vary I suppose. When I was dating, usually the guy would see me home, or carry my bag (which he thinks is too heavy for me but end struggling). I would say it's more of emotional attraction than physical attraction for couples. yuquidam 1 I'm always running after you. You are my ideal. You are me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lovehandle Posted January 31, 2018 Report Share Posted January 31, 2018 What is he that he wish to peep? Something diff on the bed? On 05/08/2016 at 1:01 AM, Guest :-( said: I am shy to let my bf see my penis when peeing at urinals but he always want to peep We don't practice sending each other home unless really nothing much to do, we are west and northeast apart Physically attracted and also good buddies as couple! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doncoin Posted January 31, 2018 Report Share Posted January 31, 2018 I always carry my bf's bag as he seems to be always carrying more than 1 due to his work. Typically one for his personal stuff, calendar/notebook, glasses, wallets, headphones etc. and the other bag his work stuff. So if we meet after work, I tend to carry his stuff since I travel light. Also the bf likes a particular brand and type of chocolates, and I tend to buy them and stock them in the fridge. Yes, we do fart in each other's presence, though I don't think it is intentional. Just didn't have enough time to leave the room. barocco80 and evianguy 2 Love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thousandred Posted February 1, 2018 Report Share Posted February 1, 2018 i guess as i demand equality, there isn't a need to be active or passive for my partner. Apart from having certain habits and quirks, i treat my partner the same. (when i'm in a relationship that is) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zyjd Posted February 2, 2018 Report Share Posted February 2, 2018 My bf and I have grown so comfortable around each other that when he's over at my place and needs to poop, he can do so while I'm showering, and vice versa (though we'll both tease each other of the smell being so bad it can melt metal etc.). On the topic of bag carrying, if I were to meet my bf outside I would insist I carry it for him since he's likely been carrying it for at least an hour when traveling to meet me, and I seldom carry a bag. OTOH he knows I hate dining at coffee shops and hawker centres (I feel hot and dirty there) but love the food they serve, so he'll make a special effort to queue up and dabao it for me to enjoy in the comforts of my own home. At the end of the day we view each other as equal, we have more or less the same earning power etc., but I guess what matters is whether we feel loved by him. I opine there need not be social conventions labelled as typical because let's be honest: our relationships are deemed a bit unconventional by the general public. Where in a heterosexual relationship the man may have more "power" over the woman, it need not so in a gay relationship... unless the dynamics of the relationship is more skewed in favor of the top/older one having more power and the bottom/younger one being more submissive. But hey, to each his own, n'est-ce pas? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nipoet Posted February 2, 2018 Report Share Posted February 2, 2018 On 8/5/2016 at 12:46 AM, Guest Anon said: Hey all, . . . Are gay couples just very good buddies who are also physically attracted to each other? I think so. And it's hard to find that perfect combi. Match made in heaven, all that. Straight couples also want to have partners who are also good confidantes, able to share in their interests/hobbies, have similar likes/dislikes/preferences. Me and my SO shower together, but we draw the line at pooping and showering coz our toilet/bathroom is too small; the smell would be over-powering. XD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JZ24 Posted February 2, 2018 Report Share Posted February 2, 2018 I don't think we shouldn't follow the conventions of straight couples or the stereotypes of what a gay couple behaves like. Just be yourselves and behave how you want to behave. If one guy wants to open the door for the other one or to carry his bag just do it. As long as you are treating each other well and not taking advantage of each other then enjoy the relationship and make up your own rules along the way. zyjd 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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