Guest shouldIworried Posted March 4, 2018 Report Share Posted March 4, 2018 When people in the office telling you implicitly that you are not friendly, should I be worried? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zyjd Posted March 4, 2018 Report Share Posted March 4, 2018 I've been told that before. My response was, "I'm here to work and earn money. Making friends is a nice bonus but it's not in my list of priorities here. While I'm sorry that people feel I'm hostile, I'm here to work." I was telling this gossipy auntie to f off politely when she told me I shouldn't appear so "dao" because some of my colleagues were intimidated by me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
noswilnat90 Posted March 4, 2018 Report Share Posted March 4, 2018 Nah. Shouldnt give a damn about this. But no harm keeping a few good buddies in the office though. You dont have to be friends with everyone... ProMouth 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whiteshark Posted March 4, 2018 Report Share Posted March 4, 2018 People: You’re not friendly at all. Me: I am already very friendly, considered the fact that I haven’t stabbed you yet LOL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigdanbeam Posted March 4, 2018 Report Share Posted March 4, 2018 They should change their mindset and deal with it. 我们只是同事 不是朋友 lovehandle 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
upshot Posted March 4, 2018 Report Share Posted March 4, 2018 Usually these people are never sincere about being truly friendly but just the opposite. This is just their way of trying to sort out those in their 'power' clique to try to enlist more people on their gang at the office in order to build a power base which at time might not be good if it was done with the intention to pressure another group or even management over some issue. In a place where you are only there for money for work... there are some toxic people that have this impression they can come in, rally to form group(s) to enforce influence Friendship in an office? Never happens 90% of the time. Never eat and shit in the same place is a better way to go. Not being friendly does not mean you should be mean to someone you work. You just need to be professional and careful with who you trust and share information. You can never be sure what information you have that can change the dynamic of any relationship you are involve in with people. micrhoid, ProMouth and hazilyhasty 3 ** Comments are my opinions, same as yours. It's not a 'Be-All-and-End-All' view. Intent's to thought-provoke, validate, reiterate and yes, even correct. Opinion to consider but agree to disagree. I don't enjoy conflicted exchanges, empty bravado or egoistical chest pounding. It's never personal, tribalistic or with malice. Frank by nature, means, I never bend the truth. Views are to broaden understanding - Updated: Nov 2021. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Kylegogo Posted March 4, 2018 Report Share Posted March 4, 2018 Recently being told by my sales director (via a colleague) that I'm not friendly. I don't really care about what my colleagues think, but coming from the management, that's rather alarming. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roy2017 Posted March 4, 2018 Report Share Posted March 4, 2018 Human greed and wicked from young to old some never change.lt can be any religious they come from . My opinion only.There no right no wrong face it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Colleague Posted March 5, 2018 Report Share Posted March 5, 2018 Friend? Once you leave the company for good, nobody will call you friend. Everyone will go their way and do their own things. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coolbriz Posted March 5, 2018 Report Share Posted March 5, 2018 Actually there will still be some genuine friendship developed when you work in a company for some time. While it doesn’t make sense to force myself to go around making friends if I’m not that kind of person, somehow, I will meet like-minded people and we still keep in touch once a while to catch up with things even after I have left the company. If you need to climb up the corporate ladder, sometimes you really got no choice but need to appear “friendly” to the right person. But if you heck care about that just like me, ya don’t really have to bother what ppl say to you. Be cool, like a breeze... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alien Posted March 5, 2018 Report Share Posted March 5, 2018 Is being not friendly in office same as being lone ranger? In most cases, bosses would not like their staff to be unfriendly or cant get along well with colleagues. No matter you like your colleagues or not, you still need to act like you like them. Being unfriendly not a very wise behavior to survive in office. My office has one colleague who have worked in the company for almost 20 years, all people in the company dont dare to offend this person and all maintain a friendly relationship with this person. 对自己好是一种幸福， 对别人好是一种积福。 Spend time counting your blessings, not airing your complaints. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LeanMature Posted March 5, 2018 Report Share Posted March 5, 2018 7 hours ago, Guest Kylegogo said: Recently being told by my sales director (via a colleague) that I'm not friendly. I don't really care about what my colleagues think, but coming from the management, that's rather alarming. Not friendly with your colleagues or with your customers? In sale jobs, you must have a friendly DNA, it's very hard to act out or pretend. Don't read and response to guests' post Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lonelyglobe Posted March 5, 2018 Report Share Posted March 5, 2018 19 hours ago, Guest Colleague said: Friend? Once you leave the company for good, nobody will call you friend. Everyone will go their way and do their own things. This is so true, no matter how close u guys were, once u left, there is less common thing to talk about and slowly the connection will be drifted away....the problem with being friendly is that they will start to ask u personal question, why u not marry etc....if u r in service industry, u only need to be "friendly" with your customer because they are responsible for your paycheck and not your colleague Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest the daily Posted March 5, 2018 Report Share Posted March 5, 2018 Should apply this to life outside work as well. You don’t really need many friends to function in life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve5380 Posted March 6, 2018 Report Share Posted March 6, 2018 I am retired now, but I remember the many years as an employee with so much energy wasted over personal issues. If I return to work, I will have a friendly attitude resulting from not taking ANYTHING personal, not getting angry about ANYTHING, and not having bad feelings about ANYONE. This takes a "thick skin" and a lot of discipline, but there is really no basic reason to having to give up happiness for work. Now as a senior I realize the immense importance of life and health, and how trivial in comparison are the personality skirmishes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted March 7, 2018 Report Share Posted March 7, 2018 On 5 March 2018 at 1:10 PM, lonelyglobe said: This is so true, no matter how close u guys were, once u left, there is less common thing to talk about and slowly the connection will be drifted away....the problem with being friendly is that they will start to ask u personal question, why u not marry etc....if u r in service industry, u only need to be "friendly" with your customer because they are responsible for your paycheck and not your colleague Agreed, when no longer see each other often, people would start to drifted away as the days go by. Last time in my previous company, i am close to some colleagues there, but after i resigned from the company, the first 1-2 years still keep in touch but after that no more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sum1outhere_03 Posted March 7, 2018 Report Share Posted March 7, 2018 On 3/4/2018 at 11:44 PM, bigdanbeam said: 我们只是同事 不是朋友 Sounds like some mediacock auntie's quote Will you be my valentine's? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fab Posted March 7, 2018 Report Share Posted March 7, 2018 50 minutes ago, sum1outhere_03 said: Sounds like some mediacock auntie's quote Lol. Actually i don't understand how they r not friends when both of them share the same best friend. 鍾意就好，理佢男定女 never argue with the guests. let them bark all they want. 结缘不结怨 解怨不解缘 After I have said what I wanna say, I don't care what you say. 看穿不说穿 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigdanbeam Posted March 7, 2018 Report Share Posted March 7, 2018 3 hours ago, sum1outhere_03 said: Sounds like some mediacock auntie's quote It sure is someone's quote but i totally love it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sonder Posted March 8, 2018 Report Share Posted March 8, 2018 There is a difference between being friendly and being friends with someone. I agree with those who state not prioritizing making friends in the workplace as seldom do turn out as real friends and it is better to keep personal and workplace separate. But you can still be friendly towards your colleagues though, and it should not come in the way of your work or 'be a chore' for you to dismiss it as an added effort on top of work. Again, be friendly but don't set out to make friends. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tsts Posted March 8, 2018 Report Share Posted March 8, 2018 On 3/7/2018 at 6:33 AM, Steve5380 said: I am retired now, but I remember the many years as an employee with so much energy wasted over personal issues. If I return to work, I will have a friendly attitude resulting from not taking ANYTHING personal, not getting angry about ANYTHING, and not having bad feelings about ANYONE. This takes a "thick skin" and a lot of discipline, but there is really no basic reason to having to give up happiness for work. Now as a senior I realize the immense importance of life and health, and how trivial in comparison are the personality skirmishes. Words of wisdom. I so agree. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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