Anxiety Discussion + Need help with anxiety attacks advice (compiled)

[Guest Softy]

Are there more powerful and strong words/work to conquer life Anxiety?

 

I always live in Anxiety.  Anxiety when exam comes, Anxiety when enter the army for the first time, Anxiety when my friend stop calling me, Anxiety when someone you love is hospitalised, Anxiety, Anxiety, Anxiety.

 

Now that I landed a job, new environment, new colleague, new boss. My anxiety rear it ugly head again.

 

 

How do you guy cope with such fear, worry, pressure?

[john89]

just relax and be confident

[jzlookin]

“It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all - in which case, you fail by default.”

[Guest guest]

“It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all - in which case, you fail by default.”

hmm....J.K. Rowling?

[Guest Raiden Alpha]

Yes one word it is call SURRENDER.

Not being in a cowardly way but being able to stop worrying and running away from things that is troubling you.

The most difficult thing to do in life if your ego and fear is strong.

[uncannyxmen]

the best cure for anxiety is to dont care ... really.

[Firday]

I confirm I got anxiety...throwing temper in early morning for no reason....

 

Buy coffee

Calling banking transaction

 

I guess I think...I miss my demise friend badly..so bad, I m been crying in nights.

 

okay, I try harder...bo chap.

[Guest wozzit]

How do you guy cope with such fear, worry, pressure?

 

There's a lot worse that the fear of things happening - namely them actually happening! You worry about taking a plane in case it crashes. Well, planes rarely crash! Your friend had to go to hospital? You worry he could be seriously ill - yet he gets better. Worry about new colleagues? Well I'm sure they were all fine.

 

Worrying and anxiety are natural states of mind. Try to realise that the things you worry about rarely if ever happen. Then you may start to worry less. 

[Roger]

Just smile, smile and more smiles     :clap:  :clap:  :clap:

 

Don't be a perfectionist, nobody should and nobody is, everybody make mistakes, including your boss, you and everybody else.

 

When you are alone and nobody is around stand up and say aloud, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck;  Fuck U, Fuck All;  Fucking idiot; I dun care the Fuck, etc etc  And laugh at yourself.

 

Anxiety is fear and most fears Do Not Materialise, Face it head-on, keep a poker face at the end of the day you will realise that Most Fears are uncalled for,

 

Smile and be happy.  You deserve happiness like everybody else don't rob yourself of what you should have. 

[Guest Softy]

Don't know why. I think I was bullied by people all the time, which is why the anxiety in unfamiliar places and also because nobody will take care of me in my life and I need to be independent. Thus the stress of being on my own to deal with everything that confronted me.

[alien]

I think anxiety is something tht u always worry for nothing, always think something will happen and yet nothing is going to happen. Some pple might mistake stress with anxiety?!

[GachiMuchi]

When you behave like a door mat, you will be stepped all over by people. 

The day you man up, be firm and take control of your own life, you will not have people to treat you like a mat.

[Guest Softy]

When you behave like a door mat, you will be stepped all over by people. 

The day you man up, be firm and take control of your own life, you will not have people to treat you like a mat.

I tried before, but some people didn't like my confrontational attitude and told me in my face that they are of higher authority than me. So I don't want to be door mat also cannot.

[GachiMuchi]

I tried before, but some people didn't like my confrontational attitude and told me in my face that they are of higher authority than me. So I don't want to be door mat also cannot.

Its not about being confrontational. It's knowing when to be firm and when say no. Some EQ is required in handling different people according to situation.

[iamziz]

These words might help in one way or another:

 

“Most of my life has been spent trying to shrink myself. Trying to become smaller. Quieter. Less sensitive. Less opinionated. Less needy. Less me. Because I didn’t want to be a burden. I didn’t want to be too much or push people away. I wanted people to like me. I wanted to be cared for and valued. I wanted to be wanted. So for years, I sacrificed myself for the sake of making other people happy. And for years, I suffered. But I’m tired of suffering, and I’m done shrinking. It’s not my job to change who I am in order to become someone else’s idea of a worthwhile human being. I am worthwhile. Not because other people think I am, but because I exist, and therefore I matter. My thoughts matter. My feelings matter. My voice matters. And with or without anyone’s permission or approval, I will continue to be who I am and speak my truth. Even if it makes people angry. Even if it makes them uncomfortable. Even if they choose to leave. I refuse to shrink. I choose to take up space. I choose to honour my feelings. I choose to give myself permission to get my needs met. I choose to make self-care a priority. I choose me.” 

― Daniell Koepke

[justin1982]

Just smile, smile and more smiles     :clap:  :clap:  :clap:

 

Don't be a perfectionist, nobody should and nobody is, everybody make mistakes, including your boss, you and everybody else.

 

When you are alone and nobody is around stand up and say aloud, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck;  Fuck U, Fuck All;  Fucking idiot; I dun care the Fuck, etc etc  And laugh at yourself.

 

Anxiety is fear and most fears Do Not Materialise, Face it head-on, keep a poker face at the end of the day you will realise that Most Fears are uncalled for,

 

Smile and be happy.  You deserve happiness like everybody else don't rob yourself of what you should have. 

Great mind think alike...more smiles, close-one-eye, BUT NO vulgar words - Fxxx - even nobody around..................

[Guest Twilight Zone]

 

These words might help in one way or another:

 

“ It’s not my job to change who I am in order to become someone else’s idea of a worthwhile human being. I am worthwhile. Not because other people think I am, but because I exist, and therefore I matter. My thoughts matter. My feelings matter. My voice matters. And with or without anyone’s permission or approval, I will continue to be who I am and speak my truth. Even if it makes people angry. Even if it makes them uncomfortable. Even if they choose to leave. I refuse to shrink. I choose to take up space. I choose to honour my feelings. I choose to give myself permission to get my needs met. I choose to make self-care a priority. I choose me.” 

― Daniell Koepke

 

The above sound like a dream self-consolation or rather, self motivation phrases.  In real world, people threaten with money to make you conform in life.  Singapore is a glaring example.  You have the resources, you speak louder and can bully the lower class people.  You read newspaper, it tells you everything the opposite of what I highlighted in bold.  It has been reported that workers are always the party to blame and employers have to watch out for certain employee "traits".  It also reported that how workers should work, in order to gain employer's trust, not the other way round.  It also said what are the things employee should not do in order to secure their rice bowl and how to please their boss to climb up the leaders.  These, has been deeply ingrained into the mind of employers that they are the party to be pleased, polished and obeyed.  Thus, you cannot say you will do your way and choose "me" to live your life.   Anxiety, is the result of society ills, the feeling of being unprotected, and being always told we are wrong in doing our ways and need to be on the obedient side of the game.

[mydontay]

i do have. last time, it got so bad that i have blackout n vomit. now attack fewer. another is i would chk things many times.

[melvinlam90]

i do have. last time, it got so bad that i have blackout n vomit. now attack fewer. another is i would chk things many times.

checking things might be OCD actually, but that's beside the issue

 

TS, i think you have to understand yourself, of why you are anxious in situations. Is it all situations, or only specific ones?

 

If it is all situations, go get help from a counsellor or psychologist, if it is only specific ones, identify which are the ones and try to draw a pattern from there. For example, what are the common things among the situations that trigger the anxiety attacks? Are all the attacks severity the same, or do they differ in amount?

 

In addition, it might be good to keep a record of the times in which you are having a panic attack/anxiety attack, so that if you need to find patterns and such, it's easier

 

Hope it helps you!

[mcsteamy]

Mindfulness and awareness. And then, a leap of faith. Always try and try to do something that improves the situation at any corners where and when you face it; neither worsen it nor stagnate.

[Guest Fainted]

i do have. last time, it got so bad that i have blackout n vomit. now attack fewer. another is i would chk things many times.

I think it happens to some people in "near death" situation.

[benedict5856]

take 30 sleeping pills and have a good rest...

 

all your anxiety will be gone.....

[Guest Guest]

take 30 sleeping pills and have a good rest...

all your anxiety will be gone.....

You sound like a sociopath. Did anyone tell you that? Try to recall within your subconscious if you were molested or raped by your parent, teacher, church leader before??

[alien]

Anxiety cld lead to panic attack which something not very gd to go through.

[Guest bedridden]

Singapore is obviously not a healthy place to live in. It deprives of everything needed for a normal human beings to thrive. We have no nature to soak up to, our living space is small, our stress level is high, we are all cram up like gummy bears in a tiny jar,  we need money to pay the rich people and save nothing for ourselves. We screamed at each other, wake up feeling bad all the time and the packed train is a nightmare everyday. We are highly unappreciated builder of this country, we were told we are wrong all the time, the mental and physical sickness are the highest among the world,  there is no respect for each other especially the minority, we live in a world of materialism, ego bloated, elitist and divisive society.  The whole cocortion of living here is toxic for our well beings.

[iamziz]

Suggesting one taking one's own life is one of the nastiest things to do. There are many depressed people out there including here in BW. People tend to do lots of regrettable things when they become temporary unsound or angryor disappointed or in many other negative circumstances. While I doubt you regretting what you just suggested to take 30 sleeping pills (I might be wrong), I pray no one takes your stupid advice.

 

Sometimes we need to learn to SHUT UP as not to escalate a troubled situation. You have nothing nice to say, SHUT UP. 

 

 

take 30 sleeping pills and have a good rest...

 

all your anxiety will be gone.....

Edited December 17, 2014 by iamziz

[cutejack]

agree

[G_M]

take 30 sleeping pills and have a good rest...

 

all your anxiety will be gone.....

I agree with Iamziz.

benedict5856, if you have good advice to give, by all means. If you don't, please keep the trap shut.

People seeking advise here could be going through some stuff we aren't able to understand. Giving such advise shows that you lack empathy.

Please do not suggest people take their lives as its not a kind thing to do.

Any more crap from you and I will suspend you for having anti-social behaviour.

[IkuTube]

Be mindful when trying to reach out/help TS here.  I applaud those who care enough to shed lights to TS, with love, care and understanding.

 

While anxiety is a psychological problem, it is still a 'problem' not well understood by general public or by medical/mental health professionals, therapists, social workers and counsellors.  We need to know that anxiety, as with all other things, everyone with anxiety has different symptoms.  Even a rational individual 'suffers' some form of anxiety.

 

To TS,  knowing that you have an anxiety problem is already, in itself, a cure.  It is in your awareness that is a step towards your own self realization and therapy.  I do not think it is your serious problem but a 'problem' that you hope will make you a calmer person.  All you can do is to become more aware what raised the situation? 

 

Studies showed that all socially anxious people share is the knowledge that their thoughts and fears are basically irrational.  That is, people with social anxiety know that others are really not critically judging or evaluating them all the time.  They understand that people are not trying to embarrass or humiliate them.  They realize that their thoughts and feelings are somewhat irrational.  Yet, despite this rational knowledge, they still continue to feel that way.

 

Henceforth, in your situation, everytime that you feel that you are getting into any anxiety mode, stay calm.  Do not focus on the issues.  To allow yourself and your feelings entwined in it will only create a vicious cycle.  Think of something good instead and slowly let the anxiety dissipates.

 

Still, should you think it is a serious problem, do seek for professional help.

[Oogachagacare]

Thank you iamziz and moderators for pointing out that it is unkind and unhelpful to suggest that one takes an overdose to solve their anxiety.

 

Anxiety can be experienced differently  for different people. It can become really unbearable when it takes over a person's daily routine or life, eg: don't dare to go out, becoming unemployed, affecting relationships are some examples.

 

Sometimes, if it's serious, it may even require professional intervention. Some people have considered medical help (eg: start with polyclinic) or professional counselling, which they may find helpful.  

 

Do get in touch with us if you think you need further support?

 

Take care!

Edited December 17, 2014 by Oogachagacare

[Guest Anxious]

Here is my back story:

 

In my early 40s, recently having a flu coming and going persistently and is still ongoing, lasting nearly 3 months already, having gastritis also and recently had chest pain and difficulty in breathing.

 

Seen GP many times, went 2 diff hospitals and seen many different specialists, did tons of test - ECG, CT scan for my chest, chest X-ray, several blood tests (no cancer, HIV-) gastroscope. (that's how I am diagnosed with gastritis)

 

Basically I am a perfectly healthy person with no major illnesses, nothing scary, and was finally diagnosed with anxiety attacks that I now have symptoms for but never before (the chest pain and difficulty in breathing, which was what I went to both the hospitals for in the 1st place). Was prescribed Xanax by the hospital that finally diagnosed my chest symptoms as anxiety, am currently seeing a psychiatrist too (for over 3 years) and she agreed it was anxiety attacks and agreed with the Xanax prescription and also prescribed some for me.

 

It was not a large amount, I have maybe about 20 pills altogether.

 

I thought maybe my anxiety is due to some bad personal problems that I have been experiencing and they will go away when my situation gets better I didn't need the pills, but I realized I am getting the attacks (chest pain and difficulty in breathing) slightly more often than expected so have been taking about 2 - 3 pills every week, even when my situation has gotten better and I am seemingly more calm and relaxed.

 

The problem is, I read about Xanax and know doctors are reluctant about prescribing it cos of its highly addictive nature and horrible withdrawal effects if taken for a long time and I do not want that to happen to me. I am also worried with the regularity of the anxiety attacks, I may need more of it to standby on hand than my psychiatrist is willing to prescribe.

 

So has anybody been on anxiety attacks medication before and what did you take and how long you took it for? So maybe I can suggest other options to my psychiatrist than Xanax next time I see her. Or at least I know I am not alone in this... that I may now possibly need long term anxiety attacks medication on standby.

 

Also, has anybody had the flu for that long before (3 months, on and off) while being HIV- and no other major illness?

[Guest Guest Anxiety No More]

I feel you man. It happened some time ago  where I had acute anxiety and it changed my entire life. I took Xanax and stilnox to battle it but my fear overwhelmed me that I quit my job to focus on my well being. 

 

The best approach is really to go for cognitive behavior therapy. Also, you may wish to visit a counsellor for talk therapy. Researching about anxiety helps, many Google-able links. To summed it up, embrace the feeling till the point it passes through you and practiced it such that it desensitized the sensations.

 

i found the reasoning of biological explanation fits it well for logical people. The exact explanation is due to the amygdala in part of the brain. It fires off and sends your body into defense mode when you really are not threatened. So, the whole journey to recovery is to understand your body and mind. They have to be work in unison.

 

i am at the stage where I’m watchful of triggers. For example, hot weather, noise and maybe differences in opinion on my belief system. Just focusing on moments and build the resilience that we once owned.

 

anyway, good luck. We are special people going through this. Some might say it happens for a reason and it will no doubt pass sooner than you think. I chose not to take the pills because of reliance and perhaps stigma. However whatever works, please attempt, try, fail and try again.

 

 

[Guest Anxious]

3 hours ago, Guest Guest Anxiety No More said:

I feel you man. It happened some time ago  where I had acute anxiety and it changed my entire life. I took Xanax and stilnox to battle it but my fear overwhelmed me that I quit my job to focus on my well being. 

 

anyway, good luck. We are special people going through this. Some might say it happens for a reason and it will no doubt pass sooner than you think. I chose not to take the pills because of reliance and perhaps stigma. However whatever works, please attempt, try, fail and try again.

 

 

How long were u taking the Xanax for? Days? Weeks? Months?

 

And your dosage and frequency like nightly 1 pill/half a pill, or daily 2 times? 3 times? Or weekly or what?

 

And how long did u take the Stilnox for? Also your dosage and frequency?

[keyboard]

This might be old, but seem still valid. Read and understand.

https://www.nuh.com.sg/wbn/slot/news/ah01/3bb3c2b79_u1619.pdf

 

Personally, i don't feel xanax works. BZD (lexotan) works for me at 3mg in 15mins, usually goes away in 2-3 days when circumstances settle down. Addiction doesn't set in as it's not prolonged use. Surprisingly, quite a number of clinics WILL NOT carry BZD and pass off the others to be as "good" (honestly, i don't find it as truth, depending if you need short-term quick fix or you have a deeper problem that requires longer term care - like depression).

[Guest Anxiety No More]

9 hours ago, Guest Anxious said:

How long were u taking the Xanax for? Days? Weeks? Months?

 

And your dosage and frequency like nightly 1 pill/half a pill, or daily 2 times? 3 times? Or weekly or what?

 

And how long did u take the Stilnox for? Also your dosage and frequency?

 

Xanax and stilnox are meant for sudden onset in my experience. I think there are other BZDs for a long course in treatment if u choose pills to combat.

 

personally, lifestyle changes will help. Like if u have chest pains, do a sport that gives a similar symptom. Gastric juices make you uncomfortable, maybe do a meal fast. This might retrain your body and brain to allow this occurrences seem like a norm. And this will be desensitizing the symptoms.

 

Just remember to conduct a basic drill if the attacks come, accept them and wait. Then do stuff that relieves you, like maybe watch a show. Repeat if necessary. And also, talk to people about it so you don’t think it’s a mental issue and it’s pretty common.

[Guest Glyph]

From experience, sometimes one worry leads to another and you end up having more attacks than you actually should via the root cause. So worry less or not at all about how regular they are. And the idea of having pills on standby... that's already drug dependency. You should speak to your psychiatrist about these soon.

[Coolbriz]

Hi TS, 

 

Although quite similar encounter as what you went through, I started off not with flu but breathlessness. Went through the same process as you, ecg, ct scans and what not. Went gp so many times until he had to tell me there was nothing he could practically do to help me except referring me to the specialist. Took anxiety and sleeping pills for a period of time as I couldn’t sleep on every other days. It was torturing back then. Eventually went for endoscopy and was diagnosed with gastritis although that was not related to my breathlessness. I wanted to reinforce what Glyph said, which is so true. What happened after my last visit to my doctor after the endoscopy had somewhat ended my problem. The doctor simply told me, “sometimes it’s just a small issue. But the more you focus on it, the more it gets amplified.” Well, it may sound like a no-big-deal advice, but it did ended my problem. So, hope you could get well soon! 

[Guest Anxious]

Thank you all for sharing your experience and advice.

 

And thank you @Coolbriz for your well wishing, really appreciate it. Just wanna update that I figured out how to curb my anxiety attacks without taking the Xanax.

 

I will boil fresh water and while its boiling hot I make a cup of chamomile tea with a tablespoon of honey. It seems to have helped once and ever since then whenever I have an anxiety, I will do that. I managed to avoid taking any Xanax for a few anxiety attacks with this.

 

Unfortunately, my cough seems to have come back. I have had 5 courses of antibiotics thus far over these 3 months - Augmentin, Zinnat (Cefuroxime), Augmentin, Augmentin & now on Locikline (Levofloxaxin) - but I have no idea why my cold symptoms keep coming back on and off. Even my GP is running out of ideas already. He gave me a lot of medicine take religiously, which I have been doing, and ask me to see him again once I finish to see if I am getting better. Guess not.

 

My gastritis is also not getting any better. It would sometimes seem to be gone but come back again the next day. Taking daily omeprezole and antacid for that.

 

My next appointment with the gastro specialist doctor is in late Apr and with the respiratory doctor is in late May, I cannot bring their appointments forward as their schedules are packed and I am running out of medication. So I may have to see my GP again.

 

So if there is any doctor here who could give me some advice on what could be wrong with me or what medication I can take, at least for the on & off flu/cold, it will be very much appreciated.

 

Just for side reference my last visit to the GP last week I was prescribed:

 

Serratiopeptidase 5mg

Chlorpheniramine 4mg

Dextromethorphan 15mg

Loratadine 10mg

Famotin 20mg

Locikline 10mg for 10 days and tomorrow is my last course

Nasonex Nasal Spray

Symbicort Turbuhaler steroid spray

[Zealouslogue]

How can a disabled person that can't move easily, has no friends cause of COVID, is lonely, depressed and suicidal cause life's a mess deal with everything now? Please help, you guys. 😭

[auscent]

1 hour ago, Zealouslogue said:

How can a disabled person that can't move easily, has no friends cause of COVID, is lonely, depressed and suicidal cause life's a mess deal with everything now? Please help, you guys. 😭

1. Channel energy outwards

2. Utilise internet

: how abt online volunteer (teach conversat English, generate content for Non governm organisatn)

3. Do some physical exercise 

: eg if hands permit, carry wt

4. Set simple daily routine

 

Pull together! My fren had major operation limited mobility, family suppose move in to take care, borders closed. He did all the above! No excuse.

 

 

 

 

[Zealouslogue]

3 hours ago, auscent said:

1. Channel energy outwards

2. Utilise internet

: how abt online volunteer (teach conversat English, generate content for Non governm organisatn)

3. Do some physical exercise 

: eg if hands permit, carry wt

4. Set simple daily routine

 

Pull together! My fren had major operation limited mobility, family suppose move in to take care, borders closed. He did all the above! No excuse.

 

 

 

 

Thank you, bro. I love English. How and where do i converset?

[auscent]

4 hours ago, Zealouslogue said:

Thank you, bro. I love English. How and where do i converset?

Search around at some ngo or student care centre. There should be volunteer sessions for conversations or reading programmes.

[Zealouslogue]

1 minute ago, auscent said:

Search around at some ngo or student care centre. There should be volunteer sessions for conversations or reading programmes.

Eh, i can't travel without help. I can only do online.