Need Some Encouragement

[westpois]

I know this seems to be adverse. Can some of us briefly (or you don't mind writing long) share our break up story? If you feel it is private, perhaps just pm to talk to me via msn, or at least drop a word of encouragement here? Was there something that had inspired you (or annoyed, sometimes these shity proverbs full of nothing but accusations) that pushed you to make that awful decision to move on?

That's right – how do we know IN OUR HEART that it wasn't giving us what we needed and deserved, and to pull ourselves out of the dumps and seize the opportunity before us? Because as messed up as everything seems right now, this could be the single best thing that could ever happen? I know it is as simple as who wants a car (relationship) that despite attempted repairs always stalls when we try to shift gears? But, how??? You know..? Thanks...

Sometimes we need someone to tell us, hey, you are not doing so bad. Haha

[Andy@Tokyo]

hi westpois,

i just broke up with my bf 2wks ago. was deeply in love with him and i dont mind taking care of him. but, he wanted it to end already. i tried my best and i respect his decision. i love him and as much as i dont want to let go of him, i have to do so too.

that was my first real relationship. i was and still am sad, but i moved on becasue i know and believe that my real mr right is somewhere out there waiting. even if i dont meet one this life, i have tried my best. that is my motivation.

[tic-toc]

westpois, Seems like u just suffered in a relationship. we are ALL ready to encourage u to move on and to give advise. We are family.... :whistle: that's how the song goes.

But every relationship is different, just like every breakups. Listening to other's sad story doesn't give u any comfort. Unless u find comfort in knowing that others are more "shue" that u. If u really want it, u can just do a search in the BW's archive. There are plenty of them.

On the other hand, u might like to write ur story here. There are many members here who are capable to give sound advise and see what went wrong.

[westpois]

Ya.. it was dramatic but it was some time ago. Sad thing was I just couldn't let go and kept dwelling and reminising. Late night sms and uncountable sleepless night with tears? BRAVO! How hot was that.? Soooooo not hot and least bit effective to help me to let go.

Wrote in this reply something about him and deleted. No matter what, I hope (and try) to say only the positive. Sorry lah, still sound sad maybe, forgive me? Perhaps I am the only guy who treats someone whole heartedly.

Hoping to move on now. I really don't know if I can but I wish to try.. and try... Haha.. please don't laugh, almost after a year then only I feel strong enough to post an ad at personel. ONE WHOLE YEAR, literally nothing.

So, just ask lo.. hoping to hear more from you guys and to encourage and be encouraged.

[sotong_sg]

Hi...

Well, I know what it is like to love someone whole heartedly..

And I know what it felt like when breaking up...

My 1st BF lasted 5 years..

He initiated it.. I felt it for a while.. half expecting it..

Cried, couldn't work properly..

But after a few days, pushed myself to move on.. but I allowed myself the thoughts and songs that brings back memories..

Know that I loved him.. know that he needed someone else. somethings I cannot give...

Then had a rebound relationship for about 6 or 9 mths.. basically everyone around me (including my str8 friends) told me I am just his sugar brother/daddy.. or maybe he is just too materialistic.. I dunno.. Ended when I can't see any future..

So I know what it is like to be dumped, and I know what it feels like to dump someone..

Then about 1 year later, I found my current BF.. we have been happily together for almost 4 years now...

Getting over someone and moving on doesn't mean forget about him completely.. Remembering the times is ok.. but just know that you have the capacity to love someone else when he comes your way..