Guest Can't be stopped Posted September 27, 2022 Report Share Posted September 27, 2022 On 9/27/2022 at 10:25 AM, Steve5380 said: Humans aren't designed to be happy. So stop trying ": From a broader perspective. ALL living creatures are designed to be self centered, defensive, cunning and greedy. It is a survival mechanism build into their DNA and when they have all those elements met....they started to have... SEX!!!. 🙄 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve5380 Posted September 27, 2022 Report Share Posted September 27, 2022 On 9/26/2022 at 5:20 PM, Greenliv said: On the contrary, I can always strive to make the other person happy, even if he or she is not here to make me happy. I can choose to make people happy. And I can choose not to be affected if people make me unhappy. If I am truly benevolent, then I can derive my own happiness from the joy that I spark in others, and listen with patience to the anger and hurt they are suffering from the unhappiness that they are emanating. Maybe it's time that I strive to have this mindset to enjoy the inner peace within myself. You have a nice outlook and good intentions. Human "free will" often works against trying to make people happy who don't want to be happy. So it is better to limit one's efforts and not feel bad when they are unsuccessful. There is also the danger of feeling proud or even superior for being happy. It is better to feel blessed by it in spite of being like everyone else, and therefore thankful. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve5380 Posted September 27, 2022 Report Share Posted September 27, 2022 On 9/26/2022 at 9:35 PM, Guest Can't be stopped said: From a broader perspective. ALL living creatures are designed to be self centered, defensive, cunning and greedy. It is a survival mechanism build into their DNA and when they have all those elements met....they started to have... SEX!!!. 🙄 You mean that we cannot have SEX!!! unless all those elements are met? Of all living creatures we are an exception in that in modern society we can have our survival mechanism quite turned down. And then, sex becomes more a source of pleasure than a source of reproduction, ... to the frustration of so many organized religions. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AgentFit Posted September 27, 2022 Report Share Posted September 27, 2022 On 9/27/2022 at 3:52 AM, doncoin said: Happiness has to come from within you. You have to find that place of contentment, and when you do, no one is going to take that away from you. Instead of needing external sources to fuel your sense of happiness, you be your own fuel. As such when someone makes the statement, "I am not here to make you happy..." it is true, and you should not need that person to make you happy. Your BF or whoever else is, is there to ADD to your happiness, not take it away. We all need to find and achieve that baseline of self-contentment and happiness within ourselves and think of the special people in our lives as a bonus. I always enjoy reading your posts as I find alot of wisdom in what you said. I totally agree with you that happiness has to come from within you. Yet, I cannot help but recall the numerous times I felt so happy because someone special did something thoughtful for me. A quick question: your most recent post says "your BF.. is there to ADD to your happiness..." implies that you agree with the statement that your bf is there to make you happy, or at least to contribute to your happiness. What's your take? doncoin 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest LYRA Posted September 27, 2022 Report Share Posted September 27, 2022 It's an old thread, but while we're at it... "I'm not here to make you happy" is not something people normally say. It makes the speaker appear rude and for me, is usually said in reaction to being asked to overly accommodate for someone else's convenience or whims. So either the TS had made unfair demands leading to those words being said to him, or he had somehow attracted two rude and selfish people to him. There's very little context to why those words were uttered, so responses are bound to be very varied. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest LYRA Posted September 27, 2022 Report Share Posted September 27, 2022 forgot to add... I don't think a lover is there to add to anybody's happiness. The happiness of a couple should be added mutually by both parties. It's a partnership, not a service. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doncoin Posted September 27, 2022 Report Share Posted September 27, 2022 @AgentFit I think/believe that the BF should be there to contribute/augment/enhance your sense of happiness. Even if he is not adding to your sense of happiness on a normal day, he shouldn't be the one to take it away either. Think of the special people in your life as enrichment. The bonus to what you already have. Steve5380 and mith 2 Quote Love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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