Would you give money to 'deaf' people who go around begging for funds

[Guest Donate to a deaf stranger]

As I'm sitting in a coffee shop reading BW, some able-bodied young guy came over with a card which says he's deaf.  

 

I don't understand why these people think we're idiots, that their documents are some magic charm which automatically causes us to reach into our pockets and donate a few bucks to them.  Even beggars have to say something to project pity onto us for us to be altruistic.  

 

Would you do it?

[lonelyglobe]

Nope...there was once a ang moh lady give me a flag and sign language to me for $5, i just return back to her and say thank you....is not about the amount or that we have no "ai xin" but i think is getting too many and basically have lost hope in charity and religion related donation. Side track a bit, did anyone come across ex- prisoner who ask u buy pens and keychain, they are actually quite muscular and quite eye candy but then never buy, too ex and dont know real or not....we are actually helping the syndicate if there is one behind...

[Guest Guest]

Locals have my sympathy when they come to me asking for help. I will give when I can. However, deaf people can still work. And there shouldn't be any need to resort to begging. As for foreigners... ? They can afford the air ticket to fly into Singapore but need to beg for money? Seriously....? 

 

But naturally, there will be some BW forummers here who will deem me as xenophobic for having such thoughts. 

 

However, I think the saddest case was that of Cineleasure Auntie here. I am glad I bought something from her before. 

 

https://www.straitstimes.com/singapore/cineleisure-auntie-dies-of-colon-cancer

[fab]

Always use wisdom before compassion.

 

In cases where you can't decide, use compassion.

[Guest Donate to a deaf stranger]

Actually one of the ways to test them is to ask them to sign language. Or maybe sign language to them for a reply.

[Guest Guest]

Isn't it a scam?

[Guest Am I stupid?]

On 12/11/2021 at 6:12 AM, Guest Guest said:

Isn't it a scam?

Depends.  I often get charmed by handsome "deaf" guy who tried to sell me something.   Of course, their product must be something cute that I wanted too.   Is it normal?

[fab]

On 4/9/2019 at 6:56 PM, lonelyglobe said:

Nope...there was once a ang moh lady give me a flag and sign language to me for $5, i just return back to her and say thank you....is not about the amount or that we have no "ai xin" but i think is getting too many and basically have lost hope in charity and religion related donation. Side track a bit, did anyone come across ex- prisoner who ask u buy pens and keychain, they are actually quite muscular and quite eye candy but then never buy, too ex and dont know real or not....we are actually helping the syndicate if there is one behind...

 

Oh yes, I met one of the 'ex- prisoners who ask u buy pens and keychain, they are actually quite muscular and quite eye candy' too

[Steve5380]

To give or not to give to people soliciting for money... that is the question!  ( in the style of Shakespeare )

 

Most of us have plenty of money to give to those who ask for it, either beggars or people who come with a story.  The usual reluctance to give is this idea that we may be taken for fools.   It can be the idea of the poor dirty beggar in a dark corner who, when it is his quitting time, he picks up his crutches and walks vigorously to his Mercedes car parked around the corner and drives home.

 

I have come to the conclusion that even if fraud exists, those who ask for money most probably have a real need.  I have given to beggars and other people on the street, and I don't feel any regret or suspicion that I am a fool.   I am not a fool  ,  and I can explain why: 

 

The act of giving is a win-win one. The one who receives wins of course with the money.  The one who gives wins a certain feeling in the heart that is very positive and can linger for a long while.  I feel this again when I think back of the people I helped.   The secret I discovered to be a happy giver is this: after the money leaves our hand, we should release any responsibility for what happens with it.  Our act of generosity has ended there. Period!  What then begins,  is the responsibility of the receiver to have had a valid reason to ask for charity, and to use the money to help this reason.  It is now HIS karma,  and we should not get involved with it.   Even if he uses our money to buy some booze and get drunk,  this is something that gives him a little satisfaction, and he only deserves pity.

.

Edited December 11, 2021 by Steve5380

[InBangkok]

On 12/11/2021 at 10:50 AM, Steve5380 said:

The act of giving is a win-win one. The one who receives wins of course with the money.  The one who gives wins a certain feeling in the heart that is very positive and can linger for a long while.  I feel this again when I think back of the people I helped.   The secret I discovered to be a happy giver is this: after the money leaves our hand, we should release any responsibility for what happens with it.  Our act of generosity has ended there. Period! 

A very positive sentiment. I will usually give a little and think no more of it. I do this even in the knowledge that in many cities around the world there are professional beggars. Not usually the beggars themselves but older people who control them. They know well that the sight of a ragged young kid will have a more heartwarming effect than an older guy or woman. The old musical "Oliver" by Lionel Bart sort of illustrates this extremely well, although it focuses on pickpockets.

 

 

A few years ago I came across an older man who had obviously been badly burned. His face and arms were red and scarred - not the sort than can be created by a face mask. Clearly he could not work and depended on charity. So whenever I saw him, I got the wallet out and gave him much more than I would to a 'normal' beggar. Against that, I was quite recently crossing a pedestrian bridge in Bangkok with my boyfriend. At the end was a man with no arms.  I put a small amount into the bowl in front of him and we started to descend. My boyfriend scolded me. Why, I asked. Didn't you see that his arms were tied behind his back? I hadn't and felt a bit of a fool!

[Guest You happy now?]

On 12/11/2021 at 11:50 AM, Steve5380 said:

The act of giving is a win-win one. The one who receives wins of course with the money.  The one who gives wins a certain feeling in the heart that is very positive and can linger for a long while.  I feel this again when I think back of the people I helped.   The secret I discovered to be a happy giver is this: after the money leaves our hand, we should release any responsibility for what happens with it.  Our act of generosity has ended there. Period!  What then begins,  is the responsibility of the receiver to have had a valid reason to ask for charity, and to use the money to help this reason.  It is now HIS karma,  and we should not get involved with it.   Even if he uses our money to buy some booze and get drunk,  this is something that gives him a little satisfaction, and he only deserves pity.

.

That is outrageously irresponsible and bad trend setter.  Are you entirely sane??   Do you know that people, in the name of karma, have been releasing wild animals into its non-native land, to upset the entire eco-system.  Same concept applies here.  Your "kindness" are encouraging people to cheat, act and even commit crimes beyond repair.   In the past, many elderly Singaporeans were being cheated by such scammer. knocking on doors, in the street, on the phone and stalking....to say the least.  These pretenders, with prying eyes,  are drying out careless people hard-earned money.   Once they have tasted the success of milking honey,  without much effort, they will want your entire bee hive eventually. 

[Guest People Print Money, Izit?]

So many :

 

1) Donate to help old people.

2) Donate to people with vaious disabilities.

3) Donate to help the Green environment/climate change.

4) School boys sell ice cream.

5) Donate to NUS students dance party. Vogue Vogue Vogue.

6) Please donate, otherwise have to sell backside.

7) Just donate for the sake of donating.

😎 Donate to schools because they are always short of money.

9) Donate to Siti's kachang puteh fund.

10) Donate to cyclist movement.

11) Donation minimum $10, otherwise cannot go Starbucks.

[Steve5380]

On 12/10/2021 at 11:23 PM, Guest You happy now? said:

That is outrageously irresponsible and bad trend setter.  Are you entirely sane??   Do you know that people, in the name of karma, have been releasing wild animals into its non-native land, to upset the entire eco-system.  Same concept applies here.  Your "kindness" are encouraging people to cheat, act and even commit crimes beyond repair.   In the past, many elderly Singaporeans were being cheated by such scammer. knocking on doors, in the street, on the phone and stalking....to say the least.  These pretenders, with prying eyes,  are drying out careless people hard-earned money.   Once they have tasted the success of milking honey,  without much effort, they will want your entire bee hive eventually. 

 

Even if you think that I am outrageously irresponsible and a trend setter,  I am happy now  .  

 

I am an insignificant individual and with the little money I have given out on the street I cannot possibly be responsible for the countless ills that affect our society.  And I am the first one to advise people to be careful and don't fall for charity deceptions.  I recently broke my rule by making a donation to a family business who provides pianos to poor families who cannot afford them ( I am a great fan of pianos ), and they already have contacted me several times to ask for MORE money.  To hell with them,  I regret having made that donation.  But even more after this slip, I stay firm and make no donations to the tens of peddling calls, mail, email for money.   At least those who I give money on the street don't come back for more.  But there was an exception...  once a bump at my food store asked me to buy him a coffee at a Starbucks.  I agreed, and he ordered two coffees to go, at this stand where I would never buy anything from.  Well... good for him.  Then some days later, he came to me with the same request.  To my great satisfaction I gently told him that I was... oh so sorry, ha ha.

 

Your mentality seems to be so similar to that of the Conservative Republicans in America:  "why are we giving away so much money to these lazy people asking for entitlements and handouts, and then when they get the money they will live from it and don't work?".  I kind of agree with this.  There are plenty of people in desperate need, and there are equally plenty of slick ones who exploit the system.  The problem that needs solution is how to separate the needy from the slick.   A true progressive, I find myself wishing that the big trillion dollar social program now being debated won't pass...

[auscent]

No. I need to be as sure as I can. Hence I donate only to organisations or people I know personally.