How do you handle rude dates or FWBs?

[Guest rude]

I personally encountered a few occasions where the dates I met for the first time I find them damn rude. It's as if their teachers or parents have never taught them basic manners before.

 

And the amazing part is they think it's no big deal for their rude behavior. This group of I'm referring to are those in their 20s. I'm not generalizing but hard data don't lie.

 

Egs of rude behavior:

 

1. Texting away with their heads down while eating with me.
2. Playing games while both of us were lying naked beside each other.
3. Saying in your face you are not my type, I don't know why I come and meet you while eating together.

  

On the other hand, I have met someone who is only 19. He is so polite and respectful. He don't text while he is in a conversation with me and if he needs to reply on WhatsApp, he will say excuse me, I need to reply to my friends. But for every 20 people I met, only one with basic manners will appear.

 

What other rude behavior have you experienced before? Is it a norm to feel so self-entitled these days until you don't need to observe basic social etiquette towards others? 

 

How do you handle such situations? Do you stand up and walk away or do you try to keep the conversation going even though you know it's a waste of time?

[fab]

With love.

 

Lots and lots.

[Chinster]

Some people live in a bubble where they are oblivious to everything around them. They have no conception of social etiquette and/or they simply don't know whatever they are doing is not polite.

Depending on the situation, the extreme reaction for me will be to say that we are not right for each other or its not working and no offense, smile and say bye.

Judge impartially. Walk away if you don't want to waste each other's time and move on. Otherwise, give it a go and hope all works out fine.

[Beefycub]

I'd actually prefer to hear that I'm not his/her type, rather than wishy-washy answers.

I wouldn't see this as him/her being rude, unless he/she said it in a callous manner?

 

Annoying dates are regardless of age though. Had some bad ones with both young and old dudes.
I once asked an older dude what he does for a living and he said "why does it matter what i do?"

 

Oh well. Moving along...

 

On 6/1/2019 at 6:57 PM, Guest rude said:

 

1. Saying in your face you are not my type, I don't know why I come and meet you while eating together.

  

 

 

Edited June 3, 2019 by Beefycub

[Guest Try and see]

You can do like that Lizzie (the girl played by Kiera Knightley) does in the clip below.

 

Each time Lady Catherine (the old woman) tries to insult Lizzie, she calmly answers back without losing her cool.

 

 

 

 

I once had someone (during a first-time meetup) put his laptop between us on the food table, open it, and start typing, while we were eating and talking. 

 

We were sitting opposite each other, so his laptop was facing only him. Not sure if he was aware how rude that was, but anyway we never went out anymore after that one time.

 

Personally, I try not to create a scene or start an argument when the person I am with behaves like how you described. I just observe their behaviour, and then drop them i.e. don't make anymore contact with them.

 

If they try to ask me out again, I will politely decline.

[Guest Thomas]

simply dump them

[Guest guest]

It is common and normal that people now like to look at their phone while meeting people. Even friends and family members. People simply cannot don't look at their phone even for 5 sec. Often you can see people playing games or watching drama on their while walking on the street, i simply cannot understand why they behave like this?

[Guest Neh Neh Pok]

Certainly. Singapore has always been a rude society. Goes back decades. The govt ran a courtesy campaign during the 70s. Guess how rude people can be?

 

When I was younger, I was too nice and polite to tell rude people off.  Now I will not hesitate to tell them to fuck themselves if warranted. 

[Guest Try and see]

7 hours ago, Guest Neh Neh Pok said:

Certainly. Singapore has always been a rude society. Goes back decades. The govt ran a courtesy campaign during the 70s. Guess how rude people can be?

 

When I was younger, I was too nice and polite to tell rude people off.  Now I will not hesitate to tell them to fuck themselves if warranted. 

 

I agree. I would say the current millennial generation is more polite as adults in their 20s-30s than the adults I grew up with as a kid during the 80s.

 

I don't think it's intentional though. S'poreans born in the 50s-60s grew up in tougher environments so they are probably less aware of etiquette and manners, etc. Those were the early days of S'pore too so people had to work very hard to succeed, and as a result, etiquette and manners took a back seat.

 

Kids today are lucky because globalisation and the internet helps us to learn the good things from other cultures, reminding us that one can be successful without being rude and impolite.

 

And yes, nowadays I also don't hesitate to tell people off in public if they go too far. 

Used to be too nice and polite when I was younger, and basically got walked all over.

[Leanmeat]

On 6/1/2019 at 6:57 PM, Guest rude said:

I personally encountered a few occasions where the dates I met for the first time I find them damn rude. It's as if their teachers or parents have never taught them basic manners before.

 

And the amazing part is they think it's no big deal for their rude behavior. This group of I'm referring to are those in their 20s. I'm not generalizing but hard data don't lie.

 

Egs of rude behavior:

 

1. Texting away with their heads down while eating with me.
2. Playing games while both of us were lying naked beside each other.
3. Saying in your face you are not my type, I don't know why I come and meet you while eating together.

  

On the other hand, I have met someone who is only 19. He is so polite and respectful. He don't text while he is in a conversation with me and if he needs to reply on WhatsApp, he will say excuse me, I need to reply to my friends. But for every 20 people I met, only one with basic manners will appear.

 

What other rude behavior have you experienced before? Is it a norm to feel so self-entitled these days until you don't need to observe basic social etiquette towards others? 

 

How do you handle such situations? Do you stand up and walk away or do you try to keep the conversation going even though you know it's a waste of time?

 

Whats the point of keeping the conversation going?

[auscent]

Lol. 

 

Once this FWB spend 3/4 of the time chatting-texting on what dont seem urgent while we were having ice cream. No expln given.

 

I finished up, paid my half and left.