egal Posted September 14, 2023 Report Share Posted September 14, 2023 do you fall in and out of love real love? fast to your terms? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Firstinsight2000 Posted September 14, 2023 Report Share Posted September 14, 2023 Don’t mix up love with infactuation. Manlybottomsucker 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
egal Posted September 14, 2023 Author Report Share Posted September 14, 2023 good point, but it is a start, right Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Firstinsight2000 Posted September 14, 2023 Report Share Posted September 14, 2023 Infatuation is a good starting point Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doncoin Posted September 14, 2023 Report Share Posted September 14, 2023 12 hours ago, egal said: do you fall in and out of love real love? fast to your terms? I think there are enough romance novels and movies to help describe those feelings. Just pick any movie of your choice. Quote Love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AgentFit Posted September 15, 2023 Report Share Posted September 15, 2023 18 hours ago, egal said: do you fall in and out of love real love? fast to your terms? Can you share why you asked these questions? What kind of responses do you hope to receive? yhtang 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
egal Posted September 15, 2023 Author Report Share Posted September 15, 2023 just to know what are others' experience no expectations Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yhtang Posted September 16, 2023 Report Share Posted September 16, 2023 On 9/15/2023 at 11:58 AM, egal said: just to know what are others' experience no expectations This are my experiences and observations on falling in love with someone. There is a difference between falling in love with someone and loving/needing the feeling of being in love. In the case of the former, the emphasis is on the person one loves. The latter is more the feeling and emotion of being in love, whoever that person may be. However, more important is the mutual feeling between the two parties. If it is very much a one sided affair, it is no better than an infatuation, which may lead to stalking or worse. "Trying to win him/her over" sounds romantic, along the lines of "the course of true love is never did run smooth." However, one has to recognise the line between being persistent and sexual harassment. I have fallen in love before, and had to face having to terminate my feelings of love. The latter was painful and frustrating, and it took a while to accept the end of the relationship. The healing took a very much longer time. I hope this answers your question. T Gunner 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stockybi Posted September 17, 2023 Report Share Posted September 17, 2023 9 hours ago, yhtang said: This are my experiences and observations on falling in love with someone. There is a difference between falling in love with someone and loving/needing the feeling of being in love. In the case of the former, the emphasis is on the person one loves. The latter is more the feeling and emotion of being in love, whoever that person may be. However, more important is the mutual feeling between the two parties. If it is very much a one sided affair, it is no better than an infatuation, which may lead to stalking or worse. "Trying to win him/her over" sounds romantic, along the lines of "the course of true love is never did run smooth." However, one has to recognise the line between being persistent and sexual harassment. I have fallen in love before, and had to face having to terminate my feelings of love. The latter was painful and frustrating, and it took a while to accept the end of the relationship. The healing took a very much longer time. I hope this answers your question. I am currently in a situation between loving/needing of being ion love and infatuation. He is attached to a girl so I know this is not love. We hooked up from time to time and it's something we both enjoy doing. Gonna be ending soon not by choice but because he is moving. Agree that it is a painful process, to think of him 24/7, having the feeling to see him and spend time as much time with him and the agony of waiting to meet him. Even had the thought of moving with him. I think I understand now what we see in movies where a person is a third party in couple's relationship and what that person can do to keep being close or continue the relationship. A very dangerous feeling to be in. But from the start, I had expected that this will not be a fairytale happily ever in this case. Even if he is not moving, there will be a time he will put a stop to such sexual relationship or worse, he finds someone who can satisfy him more. I am thankful that I am matured enough to handle this but the thought of the good old times and the let-go is just unbearable. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yhtang Posted September 17, 2023 Report Share Posted September 17, 2023 (edited) 12 hours ago, stockybi said: I am currently in a situation between loving/needing of being ion love and infatuation. He is attached to a girl so I know this is not love. We hooked up from time to time and it's something we both enjoy doing. Gonna be ending soon not by choice but because he is moving. . . But from the start, I had expected that this will not be a fairytale happily ever in this case. Even if he is not moving, there will be a time he will put a stop to such sexual relationship or worse, he finds someone who can satisfy him more. I am thankful that I am matured enough to handle this but the thought of the good old times and the let-go is just unbearable. I am happy for you that you have, from the very beginning, recognised the possible conclusion to your relationship, and that you are matured enough to handle the inevitable. Yes, I agree that the memories of the the good times and then having to let go is quite agonizing. Perhaps looking at it from a slightly different perspective may sweeten the pain somewhat. If you were to think how fortunate you were to have had such a friendship for that period of time, when other people may not have the chance of such a deep relationship, maybe it would not hurt so much. I feel the end of a relationship is very much like mourning a death, with emotions starting with denial, anger, etc. I am not saying treating it as a type of death makes it less painless, I think it would just make it more manageable. Would the heart heal in time? Most probably, but the scar remains. Such is life. As Lord Tennyson wrote, “'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.” I wish you well, and you will survive this, as did many before you, and shall many in the days and years to come. Edited September 17, 2023 by yhtang inamoto 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beaveheart Posted September 21, 2023 Report Share Posted September 21, 2023 On 9/14/2023 at 4:49 PM, egal said: do you fall in and out of love real love? fast to your terms? Love is a natural human emotion. So love spontaneously when the feeling arises and don’t think too much. Your question, falling in and out of love fast to your terms means you are managing and controlling. You are letting your feelings of love influenced by societal norms, personal experiences, and learned behaviors. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
egal Posted September 22, 2023 Author Report Share Posted September 22, 2023 u have a point Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve5380 Posted September 26, 2023 Report Share Posted September 26, 2023 (edited) Hopefully we fall in love much deeper than we fall OUT of love. Ideally, we should ONLY fall IN love. A love that lasts until the beloved passes away. This is what happens with our love for parents and other family members. It should also happen if we have a partner. This is what happened to me. Such relationship is a blessing, but its end is very painful. . Edited October 30, 2023 by Steve5380 Yas1950 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yas1950 Posted September 26, 2023 Report Share Posted September 26, 2023 10 hours ago, Steve5380 said: Hopefully we fall in love much deeper than we fall OUT of love. Ideally, we should ONLY fall IN love. A love that ends until the beloved passes away. This is what happens with our love for parents and other family members. It should also happen if we have a partner. This is what happened to me. Such relationship is a blessing, but its end is very painful. My sincere condolences Steve. I feel for you. Warmest Hugs. I've also lost LTR partners mainly bcos either the guy was getting married or he was moving on to someone younger or better or getting hitched. Most of my LTRs were with Bi guys like myself. Steve5380 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unif0rm Posted September 26, 2023 Report Share Posted September 26, 2023 how do you guys get over someone you cannot fall for? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IkuTube Posted September 26, 2023 Report Share Posted September 26, 2023 It is our nature to love. Humans are born with it. Love is natural. I am a believer that love is, and can be, a blessing. It is my opinion that love leads us to evolve and it provides/teaches us with life lessons. When someone is told repeatedly ('indoctrinated' during his/her younger days) not to trust any strangers and they are not given with logical/reasonable explanation, he/she develops an unspoken doubt about love mentally and emotionally growing up. Such an incident is one cause for him/her to suffer a bad childhood trauma. It makes this person not to be able to fall in love easily and completely as he/she, subconsciously, is having trouble with the trust issue. When there is an issue with trust, progress is slow. It is very usual that nothing good can develop too. Likely, with respect, it can also turn for these individuals to have negative mindset generally. It is said that 'It is impossible to go through life without trust'. Quote Click Here To Visit My Blog @ "The Blessed Life" *Let me live my life to be an instrument of 'Love', in how I speak and in how I see others* - May there be Love and Peace beyond all understanding - Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve5380 Posted September 26, 2023 Report Share Posted September 26, 2023 1 hour ago, IkuTube said: It is our nature to love. Humans are born with it. Love is natural. I am a believer that love is, and can be, a blessing. It is my opinion that love leads us to evolve and it provides/teaches us with life lessons. When someone is told repeatedly ('indoctrinated' during his/her younger days) not to trust any strangers and they are not given with logical/reasonable explanation, he/she develops an unspoken doubt about love mentally and emotionally growing up. Such an incident is one cause for him/her to suffer a bad childhood trauma. It makes this person not to be able to fall in love easily and completely as he/she, subconsciously, is having trouble with the trust issue. When there is an issue with trust, progress is slow. It is very usual that nothing good can develop too. Likely, with respect, it can also turn for these individuals to have negative mindset generally. It is said that 'It is impossible to go through life without trust'. I also believe that love is naturally in our genes, but it can remain dormant nearly indefinitely. And when it comes out, it is not easy to identify it. Love is not the opposite of hate. Not at all. We can be a decent person, driven by good morality, but love may not be part of the equation. I lived like this in my youth. But along the way, something or someone may trigger the love naturally in us to awake. No telling how fast we "fall in love", or if it occasionally be a blessing or a curse. Once awake, it becomes part of us and we become a more "complete" person. Some lives may come to an end without love having ever been awaken, which is a pity, but it is for these cases that reincarnation should be real. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
auscent Posted October 14, 2023 Report Share Posted October 14, 2023 I can be infatuated far more easily than falling in love. Time will tell the difference, always. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MasterFitMalaySG4U Posted October 21, 2023 Report Share Posted October 21, 2023 Lust is better no need to put feelings on it...just enjoy that wild fun or that hot sex 😂 Today or present hookups is more to fun or lust then commitment....n pls don't drama over it! Remember that the deal 🤝 or u choose to accept or meet them! That is why fun sex in today context is awesome just don't be emo or drama or even put feelings on it..just enjoy brah! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swimfun Posted October 21, 2023 Report Share Posted October 21, 2023 On 9/14/2023 at 4:49 PM, egal said: do you fall in and out of love real love? fast to your terms? Love is a complex and deeply personal emotion, and it can vary from person to person. Some people experience enduring, lasting love, while others may have changing feelings over time. It really depends on the individual and their unique experiences and relationships. Relationships are much about give-and-take. Base it on love, build it with faith and there's much for both to compromise. If both can't reach that stage, the relationship is bound to crumble. Though there are times when the passion dies down, and the feeling wears out and both get tired of each other, if there's even love in the first place, it's really not that hard to rekindle the waning flame. It just takes a bit of effort, and time. Yas1950 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
egal Posted October 30, 2023 Author Report Share Posted October 30, 2023 based on that, i could fall in love with u already, lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve5380 Posted October 30, 2023 Report Share Posted October 30, 2023 14 hours ago, egal said: based on that, i could fall in love with u already, lol You can fall in love at any time. Don't fear it, don't fight it. But handle it smartly and carefully. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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