leckmich Posted July 1 Posted July 1 do you think it is all in the head? or can it be physiological? care to share? Quote
wanton_mee Posted July 1 Posted July 1 1st time solo performance experience. I have been learning and playing a 21-string Chinese musical instrument (Guzheng) for 10 years, but I had never performed in public before. Last year I had an opportunity to perform at our company’s Dinner and Dance - Talent's competition in Nov 2025. Before the main event, we had to go for an audition at the company auditorium in July. The invitation came out about two months prior, so I thought, "Ok la, got ample time to practice." They even gave us a few rehearsal dates. Because I was already very familiar with the music, I felt quite confident—I just needed to polish it a bit more. On the day of the audition, there were 5 judges and about 20 participants waiting. Worse part, I was placed last one the list. Until my turn, suddenly I became very nervous. Suddenly main lights turned off and spotlights turned on. looked down at my guzheng and my heart nearly stopped. The spotlights were casting double shadows across the soundboard. Instead of 21 strings, it looked like 42 strings!! 😮 Die la, the judge cued me to start! Sweat in my pants!!!!! I did very bad audition because I paused many times and relying on whatever leftover muscle memory, I managed to complete the entire piece of music. I was so ashamed of myself after that, and I thought I was not going to make it finalist, but I did not feel regret about it. My takeaway... 1. Need to rehearse under real stage lighting to adapt to unexpected visual effects. 2. Lack of performance experience. Playing for 10years at home is not going to guarantee confidence for public performance. 3. Stage panic - afraid of crowd and also, I kept thinking what if I this fail. Anyway, I got into finalist with other 5 performers, and I had performed for 2000 guests. On the actual event, I was so nervous and nonstop munching snacks and hey... it helps me to calm down quite a bit. Just a few mins before going up the stage, I had a sudden mindset shifted [ tonight's performance is entirely for myself! ] Instead of looking at the audiences, I look at the far end when the sound controllers stationed. Sat down and looked at my guzheng, began to play and every inhale and exhale as a pacemaker. I successfully completed the entire piece smoothly and calmly. In the end, I did not win 🤪but at least I did well for myself. Performance anxiety can be caused by environment settings too, temperature, lights and crowds, especially with VIPs 🤐 leckmich, AsianMatureMan and Nivek 1 2 Quote 风没有形状，风骚才有！💋
wanton_mee Posted July 1 Posted July 1 3 hours ago, leckmich said: woww, that's cool. Scary experience actually. 2027 DnD, let me think about it🫠 Quote 风没有形状，风骚才有！💋
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