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This thread was first started by musclebot. Hope he is doing fine. Sometimes gays are most cruel to their own kind. We have all walked similar paths before. I recall two stories. One is a very well known one, about an old monk and a young monk. The young monk was not happy that his master carried a damsel in distress across the river. In reply, the old monk said that while he had put her down after crossing the river, he still carried her in his heart. Many of us are like that. The second story is even more interesting, about a charitable old lady who supported a monk in his religious cultivation by providing him with food and lodging. One day she decided to test him by sending her pretty daughter to seduce him. When the daughter reported that he was immune to her seductions, she chased him away and burnt the hut where he stayed. It's really not about whether one is gay, bi or straight, top or bottom, young or old, ugly or good looking. It's about whether you are at peace with yourself. Just hope that there is more support for one another here, rather than judging, cos there is already enough of that. By the way, it's no use giving too much unsolicited advice unless you have walked down the same path. And if you have really walked the same path, you would then not give unsolicited advice. Cheers!

Then may I asked you, owning a car ,especially here , is it a necessity or a luxury? What you see unimportant or unnecessary, is someone else's priority. You can live without owning a car, and you can live without smoking. But how someone wishes to do with their income, is none of anyone's business. My point here is very simple. What you see as your necessity, doesn't gives you the right to override someone else's choice. What you see as your necessity ( in this case driving a car) doesn't give you anymore right to release so much carbon monoxide into the air when you start your engine everytime. Like it or not, you have just contradicted yourself when you accuse a smoker for exhaling unhealthy second hand smoke. Per exhale of smoke from a cigerette vs per omission of the monoxide from your car, in terms of volume, which is more? Mind you, you can die in your own car , when you breath carbon monoxide released by your own car, into your own car with all windscreen up.should you taper with the car's sysem, only within minutes. Would you like to try? Don't be so narrow minded as to think someone here is picking up a fight, when he is hightlightng a fact which many overlooked, when they point finger at others, only to realize they are also contributing to the pie, if not, even more. You campaign fervently to save the trees, to save illegal lumbering and deforestation, yet you can't wait, to get hold of your Straits Times first thing in the morning, just to read how your shares are doing. And I hope your shares have nothing to do with timber products.

gstc82 - Please don't play the victim. The only one who seems to have insulted many people is yourself. It is because of people like you that makes this community divisive. You yourself said that people should be able to express different views, but to begin with, you were the ones that attacked many others whose views happen to differ from yours. I don't know what planet you're from, but it seems logic is a foreigner there. Just because a clothing shop in Singapore doesn't sell winter wear, will you vandalize it? Anyway, to me, any S377A believer must be an embodiment of hatred, discrimination, bigotry and ignorance.

After attending Sunday's OC Talk, I am definitely not going to have sex in public. The law (377a) states that it is punishable to indecently display your gentials, have sex in public places - like in my own car at East Coast Park, toilets, or walking naked in full view of my neighbours etc. So, it is not who is the poster boy but we need to understand what is permissible and what isnt. Permissible = in private, in saunas because you paid an entrance fee. Next Tuesday, we are not showing our support for Tan or Ravi alone, we are there for the GLBT community-at-large.

i'm afraid saying it out in public like this would put everyone to shame

Anyone at sunplaza now? Am here .. Keen for fun? 32 184 74 chn

Thank you for sharing your thoughts. First, I wish you could sleep well tonight after writing this rubbish and suggesting someone should end his life. I do not know about your religion but it must be the first religion that recommend death. Perhaps we should ask if one's parents prefer a dead son or a gay son. Second, I am not religious so I do not need your prayer. I can go hell if that's the way but I am not making my current life a living hell. You can pray as much as you want.

You have multiple questions and you are obviously confused with your life direction. I am not 40 and I shall not pretend to understand your concerns. Here's my response to your questions and I really do not intend to trivialise your worries. How come life like that? Why must I be gay of all things in life? - Life is filled with uncertainty, unfairness and if you like, "misfortunes". But it is how you make sense of your situation that makes you feel better, or worse. Gays have no future. - I dunno why you say that gays have no future. I am quite certain I have a future and I am actually glad that I need not be tied down with some of the life issues that a typical heterosexual man has to deal with. Ask any of our 40yo plus volunteers and they will tell you how life can be equally exciting and hopeful. Just wait to die from AIDs one day. - Unless you are practicing unprotected sex and your sex partner is HIV positive, there is no way you will be infected with HIV. Even if you are HIV positive, you can actually live a very long life. I have met guys in their 60s and they are HIV positive and leading a balanced life. In any case, you have a choice to remain HIV negative if you want to. I thought finding true love from the opposite sex is bad enough. Same sex even worst and more challenging. - It is more challenging but it is not worse. Ask any straight couples who are going through divorce and they will give you a different view. A relationship depends on how much you are prepared to invest in, have faith in and work hard on. All relationships need hard work. Hear too many stories about gay relationships. Men are born to stray and so are gays. - Straight people strayed too. You need to meet some of the gay couples who count their relationships in decades. They are like old couples, sometimes full of nonsense but they know they have learnt to live their lives together. How should I prepare myself for the next 20 odd years before I leave this world? - You have a good 20 years. And I am glad that you have actually used the word "Prepared". That means you are willing to work on something so you are not seeing things in all negativity. I wish I could share with you the mature men guide that we are preparing now but it is not ready for release yet. But you can join our program for Mature Men Project and you will get to meet people who are in their 40s, some well adjusted, some still learning and some opened up for the first time. Talk to some of them, and you will realise you are born gay because you given a chance to live a slightly different life.

You can be a female who is giving blowjobs and still get the same thing too. HIV infection has nothing to do with your sexuality or sexual preference. It is about how you protect yourself under penetrative sex.