Is it normal for attached gays to have sex with other men? (compiled)

[Guest Guest]

More than 50% of gay men had sex with other men outside their relationship. Many gay men who sleep around don’t mind sacrificing quality. All they are looking for is novelty in experience anyway. Is casual sex harmless?  Is it true that gay men are unable to separate love and sex? 

[manehiso]

I don't think anyone would own up in this thread, even if they do.. Maybe those 'Guests' would own up, maybe.. 

[Guest Wild Sex]

On 1/9/2022 at 2:57 PM, Guest Guest said:

More than 50% of gay men had sex with other men outside their relationship. Many gay men who sleep around don’t mind sacrificing quality. All they are looking for is novelty in experience anyway. Is casual sex harmless?  Is it true that gay men are unable to separate love and sex? 

There is also the same responsibility of you not infecting your partner if he (dis)allows you to sleep around with strangers of all kind.

[Guest Fatty]

What he doesn’t know won’t hurt

[Guest Guest]

I had a bf who was slightly more than 25 years older than me. Although I wasn't really keen on sex with him, and was still trying to figure out my sexuality then, he would pressure me to engage in sexual acts with him about once every fortnight. He seemed very obsessed with making me ejaculate during each "male-bonding session". If I could not become erect for him, he would get very angry. Somehow, although he's never said it, I always assumed that I was the only one in his life.

So how did I know that he was sleeping around? About 8 years into our relationship, I contracted gonorrhoea from him.

[Guest Guest]

On 1/9/2022 at 3:06 PM, manehiso said:

I don't think anyone would own up in this thread, even if they do.. Maybe those 'Guests' would own up, maybe.. 

 

Ok im not attached but many of the guys i slept with are attached and most do it behind their partner’s back.

 

To me its NSA fun but it does arouse me more knowing they are attached. Lol

[Guest Guest]

On 1/9/2022 at 3:06 PM, manehiso said:

I don't think anyone would own up in this thread, even if they do.. Maybe those 'Guests' would own up, maybe.. 

Haha... U r right. Seems tat members here r avoiding tis question. Oni Guests replying. 

[gucici]

Maybe is just the thrill, or just pure CCA. 

[Guest 滥贱 冰冰]

On 1/9/2022 at 6:18 PM, Guest Guest said:

I had a bf who was slightly more than 25 years older than me. Although I wasn't really keen on sex with him, and was still trying to figure out my sexuality then, he would pressure me to engage in sexual acts with him about once every fortnight. He seemed very obsessed with making me ejaculate during each "male-bonding session". If I could not become erect for him, he would get very angry. Somehow, although he's never said it, I always assumed that I was the only one in his life.

So how did I know that he was sleeping around? About 8 years into our relationship, I contracted gonorrhoea from him.

 

 

Good. 

 

Gonorrhea provided you with an excuse and reason to make a clean break with that stupid shit head of a turd. 

 

You are allowed to kick up a big fuss and really berate and scold that piece of turd. 

 

If I were you, I will really scold and curse that shithead till  狗血淋头 ， 

 

Then break all contact and get ypurself cured from Gonorrhea.

 

Consider yourself lucky , if it was not a multi drug resistant strain of Gonorrhea. 

 

Real lucky. 

 

Multi drug resistant Gonorrhea does exist. 

 

And scientists say, a superbug gonorrhea and Syphillis is just on the horizon and ..........

 

I wont say more...

 

There are people out there prefer to enjoy first, then regret later . 

 

Once they have it, they go into denial and worst , go into hiding, shirking all rrsponsibilities.

[Guest guest]

On 1/10/2022 at 12:33 AM, Guest 滥贱 冰冰 said:

 

 

Good. 

 

Gonorrhea provided you with an excuse and reason to make a clean break with that stupid shit head of a turd. 

 

You are allowed to kick up a big fuss and really berate and scold that piece of turd. 

 

If I were you, I will really scold and curse that shithead till  狗血淋头 ， 

 

Then break all contact and get ypurself cured from Gonorrhea.

 

Consider yourself lucky , if it was not a multi drug resistant strain of Gonorrhea. 

 

Real lucky. 

 

Multi drug resistant Gonorrhea does exist. 

 

And scientists say, a superbug gonorrhea and Syphillis is just on the horizon and ..........

 

I wont say more...

 

There are people out there prefer to enjoy first, then regret later . 

 

Once they have it, they go into denial and worst , go into hiding, shirking all rrsponsibilities.

 

Sadly, many gays know the risk but just take it ilike gambling, "aiya, where got so suay! " mentality. 

[lonelyglobe]

On 1/9/2022 at 3:06 PM, manehiso said:

I don't think anyone would own up in this thread, even if they do.. Maybe those 'Guests' would own up, maybe.. 

Just need to change the question to: "who are attached and dont sleep around", probably will get more response or maybe still no response ha.... 

Edited January 10, 2022 by lonelyglobe

[manehiso]

On 1/10/2022 at 9:44 AM, lonelyglobe said:

Just need to change the question to: "who are attached and dont sleep around", probably will get more response or maybe still no response ha.... 

Yeah, maybe.. 

[wenkai]

Alot is in open rs nowaday

[Guest Guest]

On 1/10/2022 at 11:22 AM, wenkai said:

Alot is in open rs nowaday

Technically open rs is an agreed arrangement.

 

But sleeping behind partner’s back is still cheating. Lol

[mate69]

It's a perennial age-old occurrence.

All kinds of justifications exist.

[Guest Sherman]

I know of someone who has been with his partner for more than 10 years, got into an open relationship last year. Apparently, he had been doing behind his partner's back since the third year of their relationship. Of course, the partner did not know about this.

[mith]

i personally cannot accept open relationship... i would be jealous, AND HURT, if someone fxxks my bf.

 

but i knew of many who fxxk around in secret, then go home to their bfs, and even wives at the end of the day.

 

 

[Guest bareback]

On 1/11/2022 at 7:30 AM, mith said:

i personally cannot accept open relationship... i would be jealous, AND HURT, if someone fxxks my bf.

 

but i knew of many who fxxk around in secret, then go home to their bfs, and even wives at the end of the day.

 

 

 

That's why bareback is dangerous even though we want to do it with our bf 

[Guest Guest]

On 1/11/2022 at 7:30 AM, mith said:

i personally cannot accept open relationship... i would be jealous, AND HURT, if someone fxxks my bf.

 

but i knew of many who fxxk around in secret, then go home to their bfs, and even wives at the end of the day.

 

 

I understand what you meant.

People were saying you must always have trust in each other when in a rs. Again, how well you know your partner? And let say you really trust him but can you guarantee he never cheat behind your back. 

My female colleague once said, if a man really want 偷吃 ,he can go every where like public toilet, fire staircase, park, etc to 偷吃. Can you really follow him 24hrs to check on him? 

[Guest Guest]

I remember hooking up with an attached guy and a few times, he would tell me he cannot cum cos his bf would get suspicious if his cum volume is too little when they make out.

 

LOL. But that makes me more horny and I will make sure he cum after every session. There was one time i even make him cum twice. 

[Guest He knew]

On 1/10/2022 at 7:49 PM, Guest Sherman said:

I know of someone who has been with his partner for more than 10 years, got into an open relationship last year. Apparently, he had been doing behind his partner's back since the third year of their relationship. Of course, the partner did not know about this.

I would bet $ that the partner knew - they always do. 

[Guest They Know]

On 1/11/2022 at 12:48 PM, Guest He knew said:

I would bet $ that the partner knew - they always do. 

 

Partners will either know or find out eventually. There's always that hunch that leads to the truth.

[rider25]

i love tempting cute twinks (gay or straight) who are in a relationship to sleep with me, oops 😅

[Guest Haha]

On 1/11/2022 at 10:25 PM, rider25 said:

i love tempting cute twinks (gay or straight) who are in a relationship to sleep with me, oops 😅

Simple... Find a reason n invite 1 to ur place. When he arrive at ur door, wrap urself with oni a towel at waist to answer e door pretending u r juz out fr shower. After opening ur door, u may wan to accidentally drop ur towel when he is abt to enter ur hse. 

[rider25]

On 1/11/2022 at 11:01 PM, Guest Haha said:

Simple... Find a reason n invite 1 to ur place. When he arrive at ur door, wrap urself with oni a towel at waist to answer e door pretending u r juz out fr shower. After opening ur door, u may wan to accidentally drop ur towel when he is abt to enter ur hse. 

 

haha from my experience doing something like that will at most arouse them, but it usually takes some physical stimulation to make them want to cheat 

[Guest Guest]

On 1/11/2022 at 11:05 PM, rider25 said:

 

haha from my experience doing something like that will at most arouse them, but it usually takes some physical stimulation to make them want to cheat 

If he is aroused then there is a chance. 

[Steve5380]

On 1/9/2022 at 12:57 AM, Guest Guest said:

More than 50% of gay men had sex with other men outside their relationship. Many gay men who sleep around don’t mind sacrificing quality. All they are looking for is novelty in experience anyway. Is casual sex harmless?  Is it true that gay men are unable to separate love and sex? 

 

I think it is important that we all are able to separate love and sex. 

 

Relationships are not perfect, and it is so frequent that after the period of dating and maybe a few years of hot love,  sex between the couple fades away.  This is not exclusive of gay relationships.  And then... what?   Should the two or at least one of them put his sexual life in hold?  This may not be a problem for some, and a big loss for others. IF the relationship is otherwise good, this can mean decades of life without sex.  One common example can be... our parents!

 

Nothing can ruin a good relationship more than one of the partners unable to resist his lack of sex.  IF he does nothing about this, he is miserable.  If he does, then he is "cheating", "unfaithful",  and deserving of all the sanctimoniousness and false morality of the world to come down on him.

 

If you are fortunate to have landed in a loving relationship, but the sex vanishes and eventually disappears,  hopefully you don't mind.  But if you do, hopefully your partner will understand and accept an open relationship.  Practically all the long-term relationships I know are somewhat open.  And this has not affected the love component, but they would never think of abandoning it in favor of starting a new one with someone they are attracted more. A couple I know well for over 20 years is still together, and one of them takes care to find "tricks" for the other because his dick is too small to satisfy his bottom partner. 

 

It is something like this with a car.  You have an older car that you like and that runs great.  A new flashy, superior car comes out and you like it.  There is no need to get rid of the old one to buy the new car.  This is more so if you have the ability to keep the old car running perfectly well.   In a relationship, we should have the ability to keep it running perfectly well no matter its imperfections.

.

Edited January 11, 2022 by Steve5380

[auscent]

I dont sleep with attached people. Or if I find out they are attached, Ill cut it off.

 

They can get the best of both worlds, by all means. But not from me.

[Guest Guest]

On 1/12/2022 at 8:57 AM, auscent said:

I dont sleep with attached people. Or if I find out they are attached, Ill cut it off.

 

They can get the best of both worlds, by all means. But not from me.

 

some attached guys will say they are single.

 

anw i dun turn attached guys away, just make sure its NSA.

[Guest Guest]

On 1/12/2022 at 8:57 AM, auscent said:

I dont sleep with attached people. Or if I find out they are attached, Ill cut it off.

 

They can get the best of both worlds, by all means. But not from me.

 

They can lie to u they r single. 

[tic-toc]

I don’t spend night with anyone but I do have numerous and frequent sex sessions with different guys. Don’t even exchange contacts with them.

 

 

Edited January 12, 2022 by tic-toc

[Oklor]

Both of us hook up with others to play.  Exploring is fun and you only get a finite amount of time on this earth.  Just need to have your priorities right.  I think it's useful to have some ground rules and be honest with each other.  I also don't hide the fact that I'm attached and not looking for romance from the people I meet.  Less drama and less chance of people getting hurt this way.  

[Guest Guest]

Do gay men bond with their partners during sex? Does sex mean something different to a gay man in love or in a relationship?

 

Gay men are portrayed as hyper sex focused, tripping over their own impulses and hormonal bodies in the bawdy pursuit of the men they want to sleep with.

 

You may have heard that gay men are visual, aroused by viewing erotic images and also emotional approach to arousal.

But is that actually true? 

[repressednerd]

I saw many of my friend's' partners at the sauna several times. And saw some in kinky action in the maze too.

Edited January 16, 2022 by repressednerd

[Guest 淫贱冰冰]

On 1/9/2022 at 2:57 PM, Guest Guest said:

More than 50% of gay men had sex with other men outside their relationship. Many gay men who sleep around don’t mind sacrificing quality. All they are looking for is novelty in experience anyway. Is casual sex harmless?  Is it true that gay men are unable to separate love and sex? 

 

On 1/9/2022 at 2:57 PM, Guest Guest said:

 

Of course, one cock is not enough. Must eat different length, size, colour, as many as possible.

[Guest Guest]

On 1/17/2022 at 1:38 AM, repressednerd said:

I saw many of my friend's' partners at the sauna several times. And saw some in kinky action in the maze too.

Cannot be too quick to judge. Some couple has their own arrangement. I will just dun be kaypoh and keep it to myself. 

[mate69]

On 1/17/2022 at 10:51 AM, Guest Guest said:

Cannot be too quick to judge. Some couple has their own arrangement. I will just dun be kaypoh and keep it to myself. 

 

Yes this is the right and sensible thing to do

What goes on in there stays in there

[Guest smolnusboi]

So I've been around BW for some time and I noticed that quite a handful of ppl around here seems to have sex with other men even though they are already attached?? 

 

I don't have a lot of gay friends and I'm from another country also so I don't rly know how are the gays like around here in terms of their behaviour in a relationship. My (very limited, I think only 2 or 3?) friends are also like me, never sleep around and are very much isolated from the rest of the gay community in Singapore.

 

I am currently attached and everything is going well, but it just sort of alarms me to see people talking so casually about how they had a sexual encounter with another man WHILE being attached (whether they themselves are attached or not). My bf is also sgrean and I have like 99.9 percent of trust in him but sometimes i do entertain thoughts like this. 

 

Or what I'm seeing is just a very small percentage rightttt

 

If it's a consensual polyamorous r/s then it's fine but from the way they put it it doesn't sound like it yikes 

 

Pls enlighten me LOL

 

 

 

 

[Sky894]

hmm...perhaps they haven't really met someone they really love and get obsessed with all the time. If you cannot accept that behaviour from your partner and have already made it known to him. Just leave gracefully and let him be. He deserves to be happy with all the sex he wants, but you deserve to have your needs fulfilled too. If it is not a match, besides sexual attraction and relationship beliefs/values, breaking up and being on your own might be more bearable instead. Unlike heterosexual married couples with the divorce procedures and kids to worry about. It is much easier to make a clean break and start afresh on your own terms. If you are with a hypersexed individual, being with you coluld just be sheer convenience because you wanted a relationship and could be a steady source of sex, that's all...haha

[MasterFitMalaySG4U]

If like that might as well be in open relationship. Don't be selfish. You love this person and he didn't even cheat on you but you do....I don't think this is fair. Why not discuss it or see if both can work it out....

 

I am more to mutual or monogamous even if we wanna try 3some or groupies do it with those both of us know. Mutual is important. Trust is there. No drama bullshit. 

[Guest Guest]

reminds me of one dude who i met up a few times.

there's once told me he cannot cum that day cos his bf will suspect if his cum volume is very little.

 

of cos i purposely make him cum and he actually got angry after the session

wanted to arouse him again and make him cum a 2nd time but he rejected