Chronicle Posted September 12, 2012 Report Share Posted September 12, 2012 Today, I reconnected with a bully from secondary school. He recognised me but I couldn't make him out. Time and life had not been kind to him. Unknown to either of us, we were acquaintances of a mutual friend or else we never would have spoken again.When our friend left for the toilet, the bully and I talked about nothing. My studies, his job, things like that. Then he suddenly apologised for all the things he did to me back in secondary school.I thought I would feel anger or relief, but I felt nothing. Completely empty. At that moment, I realised that I was no longer that fat, shy kid that once hated himself so much that he wanted to die.I told him that it didn’t matter anymore. Not because I forgave him, but because his existence no longer meant anything to me whatsoever.He excused himself and didn’t come back. I felt no concern. My coffee was delicious.Who else has stories to share from their childhood bullying? rclds123 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keough-Kenrik Posted September 12, 2012 Report Share Posted September 12, 2012 Lol. I being bullied was an exciting experience back in secondary school. I came form an all-boys secondary school. On my sec 1 and sec 2 experiences, I'd have all these friends who would just hangout with me for money, free food, free house sleepovers, and treat them like nice guests. But at school, I'd be picked on for having "weird taste in music." (I was a kid who would run around screaming "Hey, hey, You you! I want to be your girlfriend" back in 2007.)Tolerated all the stuff they did like hiding my stuff around the classroom, putting dead cockroaches, moths, butterflies and shit on my table. lol... Yep.Until I started to play this fighting game called Tekken. I got so engrossed into the physical violence the game displayed on screen and was so moved by the concept of getting to bash people around and not having to feel bad about it.One day, I had a classmate who poured alcohol on my hair for no WTF reason, and I got mad and punched him on the shoulder. IT FELTT SOOO GOOD. :D I have a lot of anger stored down on me now though... xDMy only way to suppress this inner anger is either go Gym (lifting weights and thinking about my bullied past really calms me down) or beat other players in Fighting Games... otherwise I'd always be thinking of throwing down tantrums. xD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Why? Posted September 12, 2012 Report Share Posted September 12, 2012 Today, I reconnected with a bully from secondary school. I thought I would feel anger or relief, but I felt nothing. Completely empty. Not because I forgave him, but because his existence no longer meant anything to me whatsoever.It is not about classmates, sometimes it applies to ex-colleagues too. Life is not about holding on, but letting go if it has no memorable value. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wilbur Posted September 12, 2012 Report Share Posted September 12, 2012 Hmmm I thought you should be kind enough to say it's alright and that you have forgiven him for what he did due to time and stuff.The fact that you started this thread and also ending with "I felt no concern, my coffee was delicious" gave the impression that you're being pretty cynical on this issue. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slynn Posted September 12, 2012 Report Share Posted September 12, 2012 (edited) I believe in getting back at them by living a darn good life.I have had people who walked all over me and bullied me (verbally) just because im nice and passive, and even though they were the only clique i had in school, i just left them and be a loner. I dont see why i want to be in a clique where people don't respect me. While they all think that im living a pitiful life alone in school, i went out and met many other awesome people from other schools outside of school hours, and thankfully i did, for they shaped me into a different person I am now.We live in such a huge world, there'll bound to be people out there who appreciates you, in fact, so many of them that you shouldnt even have time to spend on the bullies If things get physical, I always believe one have to stand up for his own self though. Edited September 12, 2012 by Slynn "To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
XiaoMessy Posted September 12, 2012 Report Share Posted September 12, 2012 I'm the bullier, I think. x.X How to seek revenge 101: Know him. Befriend him. Make him trust you wholeheartedly. Destroy him. Utterly. By typing this I fear no one's gonna friend me. :c Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kee_hsiao Posted September 13, 2012 Report Share Posted September 13, 2012 I'm the bullier, I think. x.X*bitch-slap*hahahaha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gstc82 Posted September 13, 2012 Report Share Posted September 13, 2012 Bullying is everywhere including here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sticky&Sweet Posted September 13, 2012 Report Share Posted September 13, 2012 Let me relate an incident to you. This happened during my teenage years back in the late 80s, in secondary school. I had some really horrible classmates who would call me names like Chao Ah Kua, and Stupid Idiot. No, I wasn't stupid although I exhibited soft behaviour. And I just needed a little more time to grasp concepts and stuff. And my grades, on hindsight, weren't bad. OK, A2 to B4 type. Still, insults like Stupid Idiot and Chao Ah Kua persisted throughout Sec 3 and 4.Anyway, nearing the O Levels, the school graciously threw open the gates for us to go back to study during the holidays, and I, like many others, took advantage of the quiet and conducive environment to do so. The school, which I shall not name, is in the eastern part of Singapore and is situated next to a canal. So, one day, I went studying, and I chanced across the same gang of horrible classmates and as usual the snide remarks like chao ah kua etc etc were hurled in my direction. I just lowered my head in defeat and continued walking towards to classrooms. From the classroom, I could over look the basketball court and I realised the horrid bunch were playing basketball while the left their study notes in the pavilion under the shade.The strangest thing happened that sunny afternoon to the horrid gang. All their lecture notes left under the pavilion mysteriously disappeared!! So strange! And of course they only found out too late and they were all panicking and getting frantic. It certainly affected their O levels. But to what extent I did not know. Apparently their lecture notes were dumped into the canal next to the school. But they didn't know that.Oh well .... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kee_hsiao Posted September 13, 2012 Report Share Posted September 13, 2012 wow. u guys have incredibly little nicknames given! my degratory nickname list was damn long since primary to secondary...1. ah bui2. fat pig3. smelly pig4. stupid pig5. sissy6. ugly pig7. niang niang qiang (another term for sissy)8. chao ah gua9. etc etc etcI was quite fat back then but I dun think I'm really sissy... I'm gentle but not feminine. these names calling didn't quite stop and it went on and on till sec 4... was badly demoralized but life goes on... gals and guys were all in the gang...can't do much abt it... though I acted as if I dun give a damn but deep down, I was bleeding in my heart... sometimes, just felt sad and hopeless and all I can do was to cry under my blanket at night. but now, slimmed down a lot. know how to dress up. and during our most recent gathering, I'm probably one of the better looking one in the group. so the most evil way to get back at these people is really to get back on my feet and change for the BETTER. prove to them that I'm better then anyone of them and smirk when you see how much they had changed (becoming fat... turning bald...)smile coz life ain't that bad. Vince 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chronicle Posted September 14, 2012 Author Report Share Posted September 14, 2012 Hmmm I thought you should be kind enough to say it's alright and that you have forgiven him for what he did due to time and stuff.The fact that you started this thread and also ending with "I felt no concern, my coffee was delicious" gave the impression that you're being pretty cynical on this issue. Oh, I'm definitely cynical, no doubt about that. And you're right, I could have been kind to him and said that, but I couldn't give a damn. After all, he means nothing to me anymore. I started this thread because I'm more than sure that some of us have been bullied pretty viciously in our youth, while some of us WERE the bullies. I just like to know if we've matured enough over the years (although it sure felt good to say that, I won't deny it! ). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gstc82 Posted September 14, 2012 Report Share Posted September 14, 2012 When I was in school, I was in the "normal" stream. I mixed with both Pai kia n the goody types. I m not bullied. I guess best to prevent is to make friends both both good kids but fun shun the bad kids. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hitchcube Posted September 15, 2012 Report Share Posted September 15, 2012 Well here's a story from Kenny, who endured bullying in school when he came out as bisexual. "I just want to share my story, as we all have our own stories. This was how I dealt with it. It doesn’t mean you have to give up. See what other ways there are to get around it. Maybe there is another way to make it more bearable."It's called "I never gave up." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Exynos Posted September 15, 2012 Report Share Posted September 15, 2012 You have to know that bullies are the way they are because they were hurt in a similar way in the past, and inflicting that same pain to other people is their way of relieving their pain. So don't be angry with them, because it's not worth it. It's quite sad they transferred their hurt into a vicious cycle; but if you choose to be yourself and ignore the name-callings and stuff, you will someday be stronger in the mind. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest Posted September 15, 2012 Report Share Posted September 15, 2012 When I was in school, I was in the "normal" stream. I mixed with both Pai kia n the goody types. I m not bullied. I guess best to prevent is to make friends both both good kids but fun shun the bad kids.Yes like 'wu jien dao'.Sadly, one got to be 'grey' to survive in this world.R u in PR? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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