Would U Still Love Him

[nicefatboy]

If your boyfriend were to change in physical shape. ie slim become stocky/fat or is a chub but lose a lot of weight and become thin, would you still love him?

[Asura]

I would

[Massagee]

I would too. If it's bf, I must have love him beyond his looks.

[Guest PotongJalan]

I would too. If it's bf, I must have love him beyond his looks.

Not true. You got attracted by him for his orginal physical shape. That was then. Now, the feeling changed along with the look. You can only pity him and remains as friend but look elsewhere. Say, your bf got sick or in accident, his shape changed. Thats not your fault. You may wish to take care of him but he dont want pity/sympathy from you. If you move on, he cant blame you.

But if he chaned in shape for the better, you might be worried someone else will "potong jalan" him.

[Massagee]

Not true? I know how I feel. How you feel about your BF's change in shape/size can differ from mine.

[Guest Guest]

Not true? I know how I feel. How you feel about your BF's change in shape/size can differ from mine.

It is better said than done. be true to yourself.

[reflection]

If your boyfriend were to change in physical shape. ie slim become stocky/fat or is a chub but lose a lot of weight and become thin, would you still love him?

A tough question indeed.

Most of us select bf based on :

look : good vs average vs ugly

size : slim vs chub

role : top vs versastile vs bottom

personlity : extroverted vs introverted

profession/vocation : the higher the professional ladder, the more it is in demand

wealth : rich vs average vs poor

maturity in thought : childish vs vanilla vs matured

age : younger vs older

health status : healthy vs sick

fetishism, etc

Most of the time it is like a package with plus and minus factors; in other words we are optimizing if not maximizing the strengths of the other party.

And all the above factors can change over time

Of course the following attributes:

love, commitment, care,, trust, etc are the inner factors which reflect a person's character but then even character changes

Actually, we think we will not change if some of these factors change but the truth is most of the time, the character of a person only shows when he is in the situation.

Some answers are only clear when tested.

[Guest Downsize]

I would too. If it's bf, I must have love him beyond his looks.

Would you still love him after finding out that he got STDs...eg...HIV, Syphillis, Gonorrhea? which might just downsize him.

[reflection]

I would too. If it's bf, I must have love him beyond his looks.

Would you still love him after finding out that he got STDs...eg...HIV, Syphillis, Gonorrhea? which might just downsize him.

Thanks bro for this important factor which can cause life and death in a relationship. Generally if a person is infected by the other party, he will be hurt and the relationship will usually go downhill. In fact, some may get so hurt that they start to take revenge on others.

However, if only one person gets the disease, then the scenario may change as the other party may still love him out of love or/and compassion.

Compassion

[Massagee]

I would too. If it's bf, I must have love him beyond his looks.

Would you still love him after finding out that he got STDs...eg...HIV, Syphillis, Gonorrhea? which might just downsize him.

You want to challenge my words, you stick with Looks. Would my love for my bf change after finding he has HIV and such is another thread's business.

I know Looks to me is secondary, after the initial attraction, because I have been there, and I am still there after all these years. His weight fluctuated but not my affection for him. But should I elaborate for the likes of you who know little about relationships of more than 10 years? Hmmm, that is still another thread's business.

[Asura]

massagee, dun bother by those people who do not know what love is. There are many who dun go for relationship, or worst, do not know what a relationship means.

They are just out to make everyone go around for sex, so their chances of getting laid is higher.

[Guest CrystalClear]

massagee, dun bother by those people who do not know what love is. There are many who dun go for relationship, or worst, do not know what a relationship means.

They are just out to make everyone go around for sex, so their chances of getting laid is higher.

Asura,

That guest is only just asking what if the lover has acquired a disease, and you have bombarded the guest who many assumptions. I find your reply totally irrelevant.

Massagee may feel challenged but he has his point to discuss the thread in another section.

Never feel challenged because if we can allow challenge of thought to make us think, it is an opportunity for us to grow and mature.

[Guest PSS]

Not true. You got attracted by him for his orginal physical shape. That was then. Now, the feeling changed along with the look. You can only pity him and remains as friend but look elsewhere. Say, your bf got sick or in accident, his shape changed. Thats not your fault. You may wish to take care of him but he dont want pity/sympathy from you. If you move on, he cant blame you.

But if he chaned in shape for the better, you might be worried someone else will "potong jalan" him.

I don't understand, after been together for a period or maybe year or more, what keep you both still together? His Shape? OMG, i think if my bf love me just for that, i rather dunno him at all, i would glad that we no longer together, he will never know what real LOVE is but only like small kid playing PC games etc.

I dare to say my Lover totally not my type at all, but when times goes by, he touch me & then i accept what he is, so even how he change, as long his hearts still remain, i will never leave him.

my advice is, if you not ready for love, don't jump into it, pls stop given yourself excuses to make yourself look good or feel better, & pls worst some people bring out STDs...eg...HIV, Syphillis, Gonorrhea...

Can the reply be more direct to the sender Q? Why don't say he goy Cancel??????

[Guest Guest]

"to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse; for richer, for poorer; in sickness and in health; to love and to cherish, until we are parted by death"... not many couples, including hetrosexual couples, can fulfil this vow which has been made by millions of couples throught the ages... unfortunately for gay couples, this becomes a point of attack by conservatives ...

[Guest Guest]

If your boyfriend were to change in physical shape. ie slim become stocky/fat or is a chub but lose a lot of weight and become thin, would you still love him?

That's the difference between love, lust and fetish.

Love is you love his all; good, bad or ugly inside or outside. Or at least tolerate them.

Lust is he is considered beautiful and you only want that.

Fetish is one very small part of his body is beautiful only to you, maybe his cock or is feet and you only get aroused by that part and totally ignore the rest of him.

So don't mistake one feeling for the others.

[joe_black]

i love him for who he is...

as long as he's happy.. i will be happy for him

[nicefatboy]

I think in normal gay relationship, size may not matter but for chub and chasers, size is a big deal.

The reason for my original post is cos one of my chub friends has to lose weight for health reasons but his chaser bf is not happy. My friend would rather stay fat and court death than lose his bf. Nothing we say can change his decision. Sigh

[Massagee]

I think in normal gay relationship, size may not matter but for chub and chasers, size is a big deal.

The reason for my original post is cos one of my chub friends has to lose weight for health reasons but his chaser bf is not happy. My friend would rather stay fat and court death than lose his bf. Nothing we say can change his decision.  Sigh

Your friend seems to be bound by his weight, his chaser bf and his lack of self love. So, to me, the easiest way out of this is to boost your friend's confidence. He has been suffering from low self esteem more than any possible medical problems he might face in the future. (Touch Wood!) Expand his social circle, Train him not to slouch and make sure he stands tall, Urge him to say things as they are and say them loud and clear, Tell him about his worth, Show him his potential, Groom him.

Those suggestions won't make him slim, thus his bf won't be pissed and would probably approve. But hopefully in time to come, your friend will realize there are some things in life we don't need approvals for.

For better advices, wait for the forum experts.

[Guest Guest]

"to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse; for richer, for poorer; in sickness and in health; to love and to cherish, until we are parted by death"... not many couples, including hetrosexual couples, can fulfil this vow which has been made by millions of couples throught the ages... unfortunately for gay couples, this becomes a point of attack by conservatives ...

[like wind]

Hi, Nicefatboy.

Tell your friend that if his b/f only care about his outlook. Just breakup and forget about him because this kind of b/f is not true b/f. I dare to say that he will hurt one day if his b/f find another chub who is more to his preference.

Also, tell him don't forget the whole forest for one tree. He didn't even care about your friend's heatlh and respect on your friend's decision, which matter about his life. I personally don't think the kind of b/f is worth to keep.

But, what are we as we are not him... He can only choose his own fate by his own...

Feel like wind, roaming free

[Guest Instink]

Well I guessed to each his own. Nobody is right and nobody is wrong. There is no answer to every question. Just follow your instinct.

Those that got dumped bcos of size, so be it.

Those that got dumped bcos of STDs, so be it.

Those that got loved for above, so be it.

We are all going to die, anyway. Cant bring them along.

[Guest thatwasrunie]

i would love him more cause he might be insecure as i might have dropped hints about people looking better than him. ( if anyone understood what i said )

[skylancer]

Hmm.. for me is short and simple.

If he don mind my character, my temper(everybody do have), my ups/downs,job?(not blowjob ok?)

And i don mind his character, background, etc

Why cant love him?

Right?

cheers

[Guest x2x]

Will you still love him when he fool behind you?

if he lie to you?

if he say he is not a good bf?

[GachiMuchi]

Oh no. Here we go again.

Everytime someone brings up a topic. We keep getting people touching on infidelity, cheating bf, etc.

The subject have been answered till death.

= Edited by GM =

[lonely]

Lol our moderator seems to be a little frustrated early Monday morning.

[Guest hAPPY mAN]

Well diff people diff mind set, there is no right or wrong.

[Guest Guest]

Oh no. Here we go again.

Everytime someone brings up a topic. We keep getting people touching on infidelity, cheating bf, etc.

The subject have been answered till death.

= Edited by GM =

Lets be honest with ourselves. We are all in this forum because we got no love from our bf or haven't found one yet, so we wile our time in this forum. We sided with being promiscuous bcos we are jealous of those in a steady monogamous relationship. Dare to agree?

[Asura]

I dare to disagree, there are nice people who are couples in this forum too, not all are "got no love" or "haven't found one yet"

[Massagee]

Lets be honest with ourselves. We are all in this forum because we got no love from our bf or haven't found one yet, so we wile our time in this forum. We sided with being promiscuous bcos we are jealous of those in a steady monogamous relationship. Dare to agree?

Stop using yourself as yardstick. Speak for yourself and only that. I, for one, am here in the forum to look for a good massage and to mingle with like-minded people or the thought-provoking kind. As for you who is promiscuous, I say good for you. But this thread is not the place for it.

Go try start "I sleep around, should I be loved?" thread.

[reflection]

Will you still love him when he fool behind you?

if he lie to you?

if he say he is not a good bf?

Someone paging for me? Pls read my classics in "about monogamy".

No more replies from me because I am almost tired to death

Anyway, I agree with Asura and Massagee........that there are still ppl who are self-disciplined and trying to make relationship as monogamous as possible.

Where is my next spring and who is that monogamous guy.....sigh...

[GachiMuchi]

Oh no.  Here we go again.

Everytime someone brings up a topic.  We keep getting people touching on infidelity, cheating bf, etc.

The subject have been answered till death. 

= Edited by GM =

Lets be honest with ourselves. We are all in this forum because we got no love from our bf or haven't found one yet, so we wile our time in this forum. We sided with being promiscuous bcos we are jealous of those in a steady monogamous relationship. Dare to agree?

Guest, Speak for yourself hor.

Er...Just to give you a few examples.

BearBear is attached and he is in this forum. I am also attached and I am in this forum.

Please don't use "We" as you do not represent everyone here. Even we moderators don't even know every of our posters, how do you know those in BW "got no love from bf or haven't found one yet".

[Guest Guest]

I will still love him no matter what changes... That is call love.

[Guest Guest]

Oh no.? Here we go again.

Everytime someone brings up a topic.? We keep getting people touching on infidelity, cheating bf, etc.

The subject have been answered till death.?

= Edited by GM =

Lets be honest with ourselves. We are all in this forum because we got no love from our bf or haven't found one yet, so we wile our time in this forum. We sided with being promiscuous bcos we are jealous of those in a steady monogamous relationship. Dare to agree?

Guest, Speak for yourself hor.

Er...Just to give you a few examples.

BearBear is attached and he is in this forum. I am also attached and I am in this forum.

Please don't use "We" as you do not represent everyone here. Even we moderators don't even know every of our posters, how do you know those in BW "got no love from bf or haven't found one yet".

Your so-called partner or attached or bf is nothing more than companion. I/m sure you cruise and screw around in saunas just like him. How can you love each other this way? By screwing or being screwed around and call it maturity?

[Asura]

Time to grab pop corn and watch drama liao. GM, dun let me down hor, give him a good one...

[thaiboyz]

What is "monogamy" ? Is there such a word in our AJ's dictionary ? Sigh...i have given up this term long time ago.

[Asura]

lets put it this way.

The US people believes that Singapore is jungle and forest, back in the 70s to 80s. Not until we show the world what we are, when we "gain" the status of "develop" country.

Now, the myth of Singapore being forest and jungle is gone....

Same to monogamy, you don't see it, you don't believe. There are really couple hiding away from the corner of our eyes and the circle, hence, not much people would know about the existense of monogamy or relationship that lasted for years or eons.

[Guest Guest]

Time to grab pop corn and watch drama liao. GM, dun let me down hor, give him a good one...

FU Azura!

[Asura]

hahahaa, cum cum, wait very long liao

[Guest Guest]

hahahaa, cum cum, wait very long liao

Are you TOP or Bottom? One or Zero?

[Asura]

for me to know and for you to guess

But hor, if you rather, please PM me

Leave this topic alone for the heading

[Frogprince]

Why be so cynical about AJ relationship? What u did not come across does not mean that it does not exist. By the way, I will still love my bf no matter what he becomes. When you are really in love, you will realised that it does not matter how he looks but rather how you feel about each other. Physical attraction is only skin deep and will not last, cos we aged with time..

[GachiMuchi]

Oh no.  Here we go again.

Everytime someone brings up a topic.  We keep getting people touching on infidelity, cheating bf, etc.

The subject have been answered till death. 

= Edited by GM =

Lets be honest with ourselves. We are all in this forum because we got no love from our bf or haven't found one yet, so we wile our time in this forum. We sided with being promiscuous bcos we are jealous of those in a steady monogamous relationship. Dare to agree?

Guest, Speak for yourself hor.

Er...Just to give you a few examples.

BearBear is attached and he is in this forum. I am also attached and I am in this forum.

Please don't use "We" as you do not represent everyone here. Even we moderators don't even know every of our posters, how do you know those in BW "got no love from bf or haven't found one yet".

Your so-called partner or attached or bf is nothing more than companion. I/m sure you cruise and screw around in saunas just like him. How can you love each other this way? By screwing or being screwed around and call it maturity?

You mean, a person is considered to have maturity is only when he is in a "steady monogamous relationship"? For which you are "jealous" of?

Those who cruise and screw around in sauna are not considered to have maturity?

What a load of crap. Who are you to dictate how a couple define their relationship?

Attach, companion, etc. call it what you will. Whatever it is, it is still better than you standing on the side line getting jealous with "no love" and sulk.

[oralb]

guys stick to topic...

else like gachi said, everything becomes issue of Monogamy

[Guest PSS]

Ask yourself, do your Love got expire date? Think you should know better. To me, once i really Love a Guy, he will be my man till my last breath, no matter we still together or not, cos i am very very stubborn & i can't have another love relationship anymore & my heart will close after that.

[Massagee]

There might be an expiry date for me, but it won't be because of something as simplistic as him getting fat/chubby/stick-thin/out-of-shape/a-few-pimples. Life is bigger than that, so is Love.

Nicefatboy, hope we have helped you some in your quest to help your friend.

[nicefatboy]

Thanks everyone for your comments. We have already discussed much of what you all have said with my friend. Anyway we respect his decision and I guess what will be will be.

Thanks guys

[Guest Guest_Bull]

Ask yourself, do your Love got expire date? Think you should know better. To me, once i really Love a Guy, he will be my man till my last breath, no matter we still together or not, cos i am very very stubborn & i can't have another love relationship anymore & my heart will close after that.

Bullshit!!!!!!!!!!!!

[thaiboyz]

Ask yourself, do your Love got expire date? Think you should know better. To me, once i really Love a Guy, he will be my man till my last breath, no matter we still together or not, cos i am very very stubborn & i can't have another love relationship anymore & my heart will close after that.

Really ? He will be your man even you are no longer with him ? Your heart will be closed forever even when a right one comes along ? So you have gone through only one relationship or still a virgin ?

[Guest PSS]

Really ? He will be your man even you are no longer with him ? Your heart will be closed forever even when a right one comes along ? So you have gone through only one relationship or still a virgin ?

Guest_Bull & Thaiboyz, i know what i am, i never expect anyone to believe, you don't know me either, gain me nothing to tell lies, just like some people into mono, so?

I just follow my heart, some people can even love & date afew people at the same, some people will still faithful for their lover, well, is up to you.