Is it really wrong or selfish not to be able to perform a certain role when it comes to sex?

[Guest DepressedBtm]

I've had many brushes where guys would express that they would like for me to top them but I am unable to.

I am definitely gay, goes without question but I don't seem to be able to take on the fucking role when it comes to sex. As much as I want to, it doesn't happen.

I mean, labels and all, power bottom, bottom pig, bottom slut, cum bucket...whatever, similarly like how gay or straight you are, this isn't a choice of mine.

It seems that taking it up the ass is the only option for me, and I feel sorry for guys who often have to find it out the hard way (*no pun intended).

This is starting to feel wrong for me and I am getting a little under the cloud when guys are disappointed by that fact.

Is it really wrong or selfish not to be able to perform a certain role when it comes to sex?

[lovehandle]

13 minutes ago, Guest DepressedBtm said:

I've had many brushes where guys would express that they would like for me to top them but I am unable to.

I am definitely gay, goes without question but I don't seem to be able to take on the fucking role when it comes to sex. As much as I want to, it doesn't happen.

I mean, labels and all, power bottom, bottom pig, bottom slut, cum bucket...whatever, similarly like how gay or straight you are, this isn't a choice of mine.

It seems that taking it up the ass is the only option for me, and I feel sorry for guys who often have to find it out the hard way (*no pun intended).

This is starting to feel wrong for me and I am getting a little under the cloud when guys are disappointed by that fact.

Is it really wrong or selfish not to be able to perform a certain role when it comes to sex?

is that because it is too painful for u? or emotionally u r not being able to accept that - but why?

[Lonelyboy90]

15 minutes ago, Guest DepressedBtm said:

I've had many brushes where guys would express that they would like for me to top them but I am unable to.

I am definitely gay, goes without question but I don't seem to be able to take on the fucking role when it comes to sex. As much as I want to, it doesn't happen.

I mean, labels and all, power bottom, bottom pig, bottom slut, cum bucket...whatever, similarly like how gay or straight you are, this isn't a choice of mine.

It seems that taking it up the ass is the only option for me, and I feel sorry for guys who often have to find it out the hard way (*no pun intended).

This is starting to feel wrong for me and I am getting a little under the cloud when guys are disappointed by that fact.

Is it really wrong or selfish not to be able to perform a certain role when it comes to sex?

 

why must you be so affected by this? it is your choice and preference. why should you bother by what other guys want you to do for them?

 

if you dont enjoy it, dont do it. dont make yourself uncomfortable and ended up in an awkward situation.

[Guest Topper]

The ans is a simple NO. U dont have to live your life or play your role based on others' expectation.

 

Since u are approached by many guys to top them, that means u must be looking like a hot "top", whom I wont mind topping.  ;-)

[Kimochi]

Count me in xD

[Guest Lazy2login]

Aiya .. next time you're in a threesome hor, you get one top to lie down, then you sit on him. Then you get the 3rd guy (b or v) to sit on you while you are hard from being .. ahem .. penetrated.

 

Problem solved! Hee

 

Ok ok on a serious note, don't worry about it. You can be anything you like and things can change in the future if you want it to. 

 

I have a friend - pure bottom for years, literally decades. Now recently turned into a top cos he's suddenly into younger guys and he wants to top them. 

 

So don't stress over this ya ..

[fab]

It is not wrong.

 

But it is a waste.

[Guest DepressedBtm]

17 hours ago, lovehandle said:

is that because it is too painful for u? or emotionally u r not being able to accept that - but why?

It's not pain but rather, as hard as I try, I am unable to enter the rear successfully. And even if I did, I couldn't stay erect for long inside of the person.

 

17 hours ago, Lonelyboy90 said:

 

why must you be so affected by this? it is your choice and preference. why should you bother by what other guys want you to do for them?

 

if you dont enjoy it, dont do it. dont make yourself uncomfortable and ended up in an awkward situation.

 

Perhaps it's because I keep bumping into versatiles, and or bottoms like myself. Typically no one makes role preferences known at the initial stage, it's only in the bedroom where you will really have to cross your fingers if you got the right match. And I dread the disappointed looks of those who learn that I am unable to top them. It makes me feel like a very selfish person in bed.

 

16 hours ago, Guest Topper said:

The ans is a simple NO. U dont have to live your life or play your role based on others' expectation.

 

Since u are approached by many guys to top them, that means u must be looking like a hot "top", whom I wont mind topping.  ;-)

 

Perhaps it's true that it's a bottoms world in our community. There seems to be a lack in tops. By now I suppose we would have learned to not judge the book by it's cover. I've been related instances where some effeminate guys fuck like a stallion in bed, that is if you are able to get to that stage.

 

15 hours ago, Kimochi said:

Count me in xD

Haha...hmmm...

 

10 hours ago, Guest Lazy2login said:

Aiya .. next time you're in a threesome hor, you get one top to lie down, then you sit on him. Then you get the 3rd guy (b or v) to sit on you while you are hard from being .. ahem .. penetrated.

 

Problem solved! Hee

 

Ok ok on a serious note, don't worry about it. You can be anything you like and things can change in the future if you want it to. 

 

I have a friend - pure bottom for years, literally decades. Now recently turned into a top cos he's suddenly into younger guys and he wants to top them. 

 

So don't stress over this ya ..

 

I'm not sure if my psyche will ever change. But thanks for the piece of advice. 

 

10 hours ago, fab said:

It is not wrong.

 

But it is a waste.

 

But why is it a waste?

[lovehandle]

3 hours ago, Guest DepressedBtm said:/

It's not pain but rather, as hard as I try, I am unable to enter the rear successfully. And even if I did, I couldn't stay erect for long inside of the person.

 

Perhaps it's because I keep bumping into versatiles, and or bottoms like myself. Typically no one makes role preferences known at the initial stage, it's only in the bedroom where you will really have to cross your fingers if you got the right match. And I dread the disappointed looks of those who learn that I am unable to top them. It makes me feel like a very selfish person in bed.

 

Perhaps it's true that it's a bottoms world in our community. There seems to be a lack in tops. By now I suppose we would have learned to not judge the book by it's cover. I've been related instances where some effeminate guys fuck like a stallion in bed, that is if you are able to get to that stage.

 

Haha...hmmm...

 

I'm not sure if my psyche will ever change. But thanks for the piece of advice. 

 

But why is it a waste?

erm are u very old?

if no, then it should be u  r still trying out

so it takes everyone a few tries before u get the right way

no doubt there are btms but so long u r not fussy, u easily get tons of tops of older age

 

I agree , why is that a waste, life is about not knowing what is infront, we have to trial it

[Guest guest]

4 minutes ago, lovehandle said:

erm are u very old?

if no, then it should be u  r still trying out

so it takes everyone a few tries before u get the right way

no doubt there are btms but so long u r not fussy, u easily get tons of tops of older age

 

I agree , why is that a waste, life is about not knowing what is infront, we have to trial it

Please stop asking unrelated question!!! U always very long winded!!! 

[hairy springroll]

Just be yourself 

no one can force you

[wantonmee]

mixing w the wrong crowd then

there are so many tops who are looking for btms and vice versa, just move on

behind every btm is a top (pun intended)

[fab]

7 hours ago, Guest DepressedBtm said:

But why is it a waste?

 

Since u mentioned many btms expressed interest for u to top them, u must be quite manly looking. Imagine tph is btm, isn't that a waste to the btm community?

 

4 hours ago, Guest guest said:

Please stop asking unrelated question!!! U always very long winded!!! 

 

Long winded still never mind but stil so dense.

[SeannyShortcake]

How about for them to take you up the ass?

 

You shouldn't have to be the one compromising all the time.

 

Besides there's enough for everyone to go around so cheer up yeah.

[Guest FailureofaBiBoy]

i am ready to be flamed ...

 

I am Bi and i am DEF into dudes. I LOVE dudes with a cute bum and i jack off to hot porn all the time with good fucking and rimming. 

 

but when it comes to an actual guy. i find the idea of sticking my cock in his ass a bit =/ ... wth is wrong with me ???

 

Save me! LOL - my weird my thinks its fine to poke a tight pussy but not an ass... just afraid of a "shitty" situation lol. 

 

how !!! - i mean yes the bottom can douche and clean all he wants. but still.

 

and i dont want to bottom (not yet at least). 

 

Regards

FailureofaBiBoy.  

[Guest un_uniquely]

You are not unique lah, just like not all Asians like durian and not all AMDK hate durian.

[Guest Lazy2login]

12 minutes ago, Guest FailureofaBiBoy said:

i am ready to be flamed ...

 

I am Bi and i am DEF into dudes. I LOVE dudes with a cute bum and i jack off to hot porn all the time with good fucking and rimming. 

 

but when it comes to an actual guy. i find the idea of sticking my cock in his ass a bit =/ ... wth is wrong with me ???

 

Save me! LOL - my weird my thinks its fine to poke a tight pussy but not an ass... just afraid of a "shitty" situation lol. 

 

how !!! - i mean yes the bottom can douche and clean all he wants. but still.

 

and i dont want to bottom (not yet at least). 

 

Regards

FailureofaBiBoy.  

 

You're not a failure. Just be yourself.

[123ZZZ]

Just be yourself

if you find the right person to be with, it doesn't matter

[Guest like hairy bush]

As a top myself.... i always envy other guy have hairy bush...As my are like so pathetic (how to make it bushy ar ).

 

Aside, why don you trim or shave it off...

 

But i think the best is to let your partner know what's your role before any disappointment meh....

[lovehandle]

2 minutes ago, Guest like hairy bush said:

As a top myself.... i always envy other guy have hairy bush...As my are like so pathetic (how to make it bushy ar ).

 

Aside, why don you trim or shave it off...

 

But i think the best is to let your partner know what's your role before any disappointment meh....

oh, I supposed it is genetic

 

how do you deemed yourself as not bushy enough?

but whether bushy or not, doesn't affect your role right?

[Guest first-timer]

My bf finds me too big for him... he's just so tight and I am feeling kind of frustrated not being able to hump him

[Guest guest]

On 7/10/2016 at 11:27 AM, lovehandle said:

is that because it is too painful for u? or emotionally u r not being able to accept that - but why?

 

6 minutes ago, lovehandle said:

oh, I supposed it is genetic

 

how do you deemed yourself as not bushy enough?

but whether bushy or not, doesn't affect your role right?

cb @lovehandle why u always like to answer with questions??? To reply to more topics and later self likes??? 

[Guest btms]

I may look top but I am also hungry btm like u.

This type of mistake should not happen if u know how to select the top.

Those btm who select me thinking I'm top, I will spot them after a few looking and interacting.

Should not wait until go inside room then say salah.

[Blacque]

The best thing to do, is to be straightforward about it. Declare your preference at the start to avoid any awkward situation.

[4evaboring]

1 hour ago, Blacque said:

The best thing to do, is to be straightforward about it. Declare your preference at the start to avoid any awkward situation.

 

That why when ppl tell them they seeking fun on other platform, I will always ask their role before further engaging

[Blacque]

9 minutes ago, 4evaboring said:

 

That why when ppl tell them they seeking fun on other platform, I will always ask their role before further engaging

 

 

[4evaboring]

6 hours ago, Blacque said:

 

 

 

Well stating the role in the first place will stop the wild goose chase, furthermore people wont be disappointed and get all upset when they only found out that role crashed when on bed.

[Guest boredatwork]

is it cos you look very manly?

[lonelyglobe]

On ‎11‎/‎7‎/‎2016 at 6:44 PM, Blacque said:

The best thing to do, is to be straightforward about it. Declare your preference at the start to avoid any awkward situation.

Exactly, especially with flex, be specify on a certain day if u want to fuck or get fucked, don't waste time....I think the term flex is a bit unclear, by right flex should be 50-50 or 60-40, but I realise a lot are actually 90-10

 

On ‎10‎/‎7‎/‎2016 at 3:49 AM, fab said:

It is not wrong.

 

But it is a waste.

waste of ??? I don't see it as a waste wheather if u r btm or top, just like someone like chicken rice, others like wanton mee....

[lovehandle]

agree w lonelyglobe

many flex are btms

[Guest Jo master]

26 minutes ago, lovehandle said:

agree w lonelyglobe

many flex are btms

I cannot agree more, most of flex prefer bot more than topping.

like they said, the flex have too much love and we cant handle it. 

[Kimochi]

9 hours ago, Blacque said:

 

 

 

11 hours ago, Blacque said:

The best thing to do, is to be straightforward about it. Declare your preference at the start to avoid any awkward situation.

Yes. Don't waste time.

 

[Guest :-(]

i wouldn't mind if we're of the same role because being a flex has many positions to play with the other guy