worldangel Posted Sunday at 01:32 PM Report Share Posted Sunday at 01:32 PM Joke: Corruption At the height of a political corruption trial, the prosecuting attorney attacked a witness. "Isn't it true," he bellowed, "that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?" The witness stared out the window, as though he hadn't hear the question. "Isn't it true that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?" the lawyer repeated. The witness still did not respond. Finally, the judge leaned over and said, "Sir, please answer the question." "Oh," the startled witness said, "I thought he was talking to you." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Sunday at 01:33 PM Report Share Posted Sunday at 01:33 PM Joke: A young lady came home from a ... A young lady came home from a date, rather sad. She told her mother, "Jeff proposed to me an hour ago." "Then why are you so sad?" her mother asked. "Because he also told me he was an atheist. Mom, he doesn't even believe there's a hell." Her mother replied, "Marry him anyway. Between the two of us, we'll show him how wrong he is." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Sunday at 01:34 PM Report Share Posted Sunday at 01:34 PM Joke: Viagra... An elderly gentleman went to the local drug store and asked the pharmacist for Viagra. The pharmacist said "That's no problem. How many do you want?" The man answered" Just a few, maybe 4, but cut each one in 4 pieces." The pharmacist said "That won’t do you any good." The elderly gentleman said "That's alright. I don't need them for sex anymore as I am over 80 years old. I just want it to stick out far enough so I don't pee on my shoes." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Monday at 03:45 PM Report Share Posted Monday at 03:45 PM Joke: The blind date After being with his blind date all evening, the man couldn't take another minute with her. Earlier, he had secretly arranged to have a friend call him to the phone so he would have an excuse to leave if something like this happened. When he returned to the table, he lowered his eyes, put on a grim expression and said, "I have some bad news. My grandfather just died." "Thank heavens," his date replied. "If yours hadn't, mine would have had to!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Monday at 03:46 PM Report Share Posted Monday at 03:46 PM Joke: Remove the curse... An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a "Curse" he has been living with for the last 40 years. The Wizard says "maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you." The old man says without hesitation "I now pronounce you man and wife". Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Monday at 03:46 PM Report Share Posted Monday at 03:46 PM Joke: Why are you crying? Two guys were sitting outside a medical clinic. One of them was crying, tears were pouring down his face. The other guy asked, "Why are you crying?" The first one replied, "I came here for blood test." The second one asked, "So? Why are you crying? Are you afraid?" The first guy replied, "No. Not that. During the blood test they cut my finger." Hearing this, the second one started crying. The first one was astonished and asked the other, "Why are you crying?" Then the second guy replied, "I have come for a urine test." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Monday at 03:47 PM Report Share Posted Monday at 03:47 PM Joke: A man walks into a pharmacy an... A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles. The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him. He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife. She directs him down the correct aisle. A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter. The sales girl says, confused, "Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?" He answers, "You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco and some rolling papers; cause it's so-o-o much cheaper. So, I figure if I have to roll my own... so does she." yhtang 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Tuesday at 03:30 PM Report Share Posted Tuesday at 03:30 PM Joke: Half drunk A man comes home from a night of drinking. As he falls through the doorway, his wife snaps at him: "What's the big idea coming home half drunk?" The man replies: "I'm sorry, honey. I ran out of money." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Tuesday at 03:31 PM Report Share Posted Tuesday at 03:31 PM Joke: Complete and Finished There is a subtle but important difference between the words "complete" and "finished." When you marry the right one, you are complete. When you marry the wrong one, you are finished. And if the right one catches you with the wrong one, you are completely finished. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Tuesday at 03:31 PM Report Share Posted Tuesday at 03:31 PM Joke: Overboard The banker fell overboard from a friend's sailboat. The friend grabbed a life preserver, held it up, not knowing if the banker could swim, and shouted, “Can you float alone?” “Obviously,” the banker replied, “but this is a heck of a time to talk business.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted Tuesday at 03:32 PM Report Share Posted Tuesday at 03:32 PM Joke: Piano Tuner Visit The doorbell rang and the lady of the house discovered a workman, complete with tool chest, on the front door. “Lady,” he announced, “I’m the piano tuner.” The lady exclaimed, “Why, I didn’t send for a piano tuner.” The man replied, “I know, but your neighbours did.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted yesterday at 03:23 PM Report Share Posted yesterday at 03:23 PM Joke: Getting Into Fights They were married, but since the argument they had a few days earlier, they hadn't been talking to each other. Instead, they were giving each other written notes. One evening he gave her a paper where it said: "Wake me up tomorrow morning at 6 am." The next morning, he woke up and saw that it was 9 o'clock. Naturally he got very angry, but as he turned around he found a note on his pillow saying: "Wake up, it's 6 o'clock!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted yesterday at 03:23 PM Report Share Posted yesterday at 03:23 PM Joke: Fat free.... I stopped at a fast-food restaurant recently. I was fascinated by a sign which offered Fat-Free French Fries. I decided to give them a try. I was dismayed when the clerk pulled a basket of fries from the fryer, which was dripping with fat. He filled a bag with these fries and put them in my order. "Just a minute!" I said. "Those aren't fat-free." "Yes, they are. We only charge for the potatoes . . . the fat is free!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted yesterday at 03:24 PM Report Share Posted yesterday at 03:24 PM Joke: Fool in love... After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." The husband replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice it." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted yesterday at 03:25 PM Report Share Posted yesterday at 03:25 PM Joke: Traffic circle Ditzy friend to another: "I failed the driving test. I entered the traffic circle and the sign said '30 mph' so I drove 30 times around." The other friend responds sympathetically, "You probably counted wrong." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted 9 hours ago Report Share Posted 9 hours ago Joke: Office Hours When I became a licensed chiropractor, I moved back to my hometown and soon had a thriving practice. One morning I saw a new patient whom I recognized as my old high school principal. "Gee," I said nervously, "I’m a little surprised to see you here." "Why?" he replied. "You certainly spent a great deal of time in my office." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted 9 hours ago Report Share Posted 9 hours ago Joke: Happiest day of your life... Congratulations my boy!" said the groom's uncle. "I'm sure you'll look back and remember today as the happiest day of your life." "But I'm not getting married until tomorrow." Protested his nephew. "I know," replied the uncle. "That's exactly what I mean." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted 9 hours ago Report Share Posted 9 hours ago Joke: But officer... A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street. "But officer." the man began, "I can explain". "Just be quiet," snapped the officer. "I'm going to let you cool your heels in jail until the chief gets back..." "But officer, I just wanted to say...." "And I said to keep quiet! You're going to jail!" A few hours later the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, "Lucky for you that the chief is at his daughter's wedding. He'll be in a good mood when he gets back." "Don't count on it," answered the fellow in the cell. "I'm the groom." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted 9 hours ago Report Share Posted 9 hours ago Joke: A policeman's eyes A policeman pulls a man over. "Sir," he says, "I noticed that your eyes are bloodshot. Have you been drinking?" "Officer," responds the man, "I noticed that your eyes are glazed. Have you been eating doughnuts?" yhtang 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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