worldangel Posted July 16, 2025 Posted July 16, 2025 Joke: Banging My bloody rude neighbour came over banging on the door at 2.00am last night. .........Luckily I was still up playing my drums!! Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 18, 2025 Posted July 18, 2025 Joke: A young lady came home from a ... A young lady came home from a date, rather sad. She told her mother, "Jeff proposed to me an hour ago." "Then why are you so sad?" her mother asked. "Because he also told me he was an atheist. Mom, he doesn't even believe there's a hell." Her mother replied, "Marry him anyway. Between the two of us, we'll show him how wrong he is." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 18, 2025 Posted July 18, 2025 Joke: A man entered the bus with both... A man entered the bus with both of his front pants pockets full of golf balls, and sat down next to a beautiful (you guessed it) blonde. The puzzled blonde kept looking at him and his bulging pockets. Finally, after many such glances from her, he said, "It's golf balls". Nevertheless, the blonde continued to look at him thoughtfully and finally, not being able to contain her curiosity any longer, asked. "Does it hurt as much as tennis elbow?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 18, 2025 Posted July 18, 2025 Joke: Good grades... The little boy wasn't getting good marks in school. One day he made the teacher quite surprised. He tapped her on the shoulder and said... "I don't want to scare you, but my daddy says if I don't get better grades.... somebody is going to get a spanking....". Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 18, 2025 Posted July 18, 2025 Joke: Cured A woman went to doctor's office for her annual examination. Suddenly, another older doctor noticed her burst out of the examination room, screaming as she ran down the hall. He stopped the hysterical woman and asked her to sit down and relax. Then, he asked her what she was so upset about. A few minutes later, the older doctor marched back to the woman's doctor and demanded, "What's the matter with you? Mrs. Terry is 63 years old, she has four grown children, and seven grandchildren... and you told her she was pregnant?" The woman's doctor smiled smugly as he continued to write on his clipboard, "Cured her hiccups though, didn't I?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 19, 2025 Posted July 19, 2025 Joke: A motorist caught by a speed camera ... A motorist caught by a speed camera received notification of a fine in the mail, plus a picture of his vehicle. Duly impressed, he sent back the notification along with a photo of a $100 note to pay the fine. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 19, 2025 Posted July 19, 2025 Joke: Not saying a word without my lawyer I’m not saying a word without my lawyer present. Cop: You are the lawyer. Lawyer: Exactly, so where’s my present? Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 19, 2025 Posted July 19, 2025 Joke: Photographic Evidence A customer walked up to my bank window and asked me to cash a check. “Of course,” I said. “But I’ll need to see ID.” She dug though her purse and handed me a snapshot. “That’s me in the middle,” she said. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 19, 2025 Posted July 19, 2025 Joke: No Wool Downstairs A husky foreigner, looking for sex, accepted a prostitute's terms. When she undressed, he noticed that she had no pubic hair. The man shouted, "What, no wool? In my country all women have wool down there." The prostitute snapped back, "What do you want to do, knit or have sex?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 20, 2025 Posted July 20, 2025 Joke: Two old drunks Two old drunks were lapping them up at a bar. The first one says, "Ya know, when I was 30 and got a hard-on, I couldn't bend it with both hands. By the time I was 40, I could bend it about 10 degrees if I tried really hard. By the time I was 50, I could bend it about 20 degrees, no problem. I'm gonna be 60 next week, and now I can almost bend it in half with just one hand." "So", says the second drunk, "What's yer point?" "Well", says the first, "I'm just wondering how much stronger I'm gonna get!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 20, 2025 Posted July 20, 2025 Joke: Tetanus Shot The old man in his mid-eighties struggles to get up from the couch then starts putting on his coat. His wife, seeing the unexpected behavior, asks, "Where are you going?" He replies, "I'm going to the doctor." She says, "Why, are you sick?" He says, "Nope, I'm going to get me some of that Viagra stuff." Immediately the wife starts working and positioning herself to get out of her rocker and begins to put on her coat. He says, "Where the hell are you going"? She answers, "I'm going to the doctor, too." He says, "Why, what do you need?" She says, "If you're going to start using that rusty old thing, I'm getting a tetanus shot shyc 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 20, 2025 Posted July 20, 2025 Joke: Guy walks into a bar ... Guy walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under arm. Says to the bartender: "I’ll take a beer, and one for the road." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 20, 2025 Posted July 20, 2025 Joke: A Doctor while examining an... A Doctor while examining an old retired Army veteran, "when was the last time you had sex?" With a long pause the vet replies: "1955 I believe." Doctor: "Whoa! It’s been a long while then?" Veteran: Its only 20:15 right now? shyc 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 21, 2025 Posted July 21, 2025 Joke: Three men were discussing at a... Three men were discussing at a bar about coincidences. The first man said, " my wife was reading a "tale of two cities" and she gave birth to twins" "That’s funny", the second man remarked, "my wife was reading 'the three musketeers' and she gave birth to triplets" The third man shouted, "Goodness I have to rush home!" When asked what the problem was, he exclaimed, " When I left the house, my wife was reading Ali baba and the forty Thieves"!!! Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 21, 2025 Posted July 21, 2025 Joke: A man runs to the doctor and says... A man runs to the doctor and says: "Doctor, you've got to help me. My wife thinks she's a chicken!" The doctor asks: How long was she had this condition?" "Two years." replies the man. "Then why did it take you so long to come and see me?" asked the doctor. The man shrugs his shoulders and replies: "We needed the eggs" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 21, 2025 Posted July 21, 2025 Joke: To soon to tell? The morning after their honeymoon night, the wife says to her husband, "you know, You're really a lousy lover!" The husband replies, "How would you know after only 30 seconds?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 21, 2025 Posted July 21, 2025 Joke: Good news and bad news A woman phones up her husband at work for a chat. HIM "I'm sorry dear but I'm up to my neck in work today." HER "But I've got some good news and some bad news for you dear." HIM "OK darling, but as I've got no time now, just give me the good news." HER "Well, the air bag works." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 22, 2025 Posted July 22, 2025 Joke: Insomnia A man went to the doctor complaining of insomnia. The doctor gave him a thorough examination but found absolutely nothing physically wrong with him. "Listen,” the doctor said, “if you ever expect to cure your insomnia, you just have to stop taking your troubles to bed with you." "I know," said the man, "but I can't. My wife refuses to sleep alone." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 22, 2025 Posted July 22, 2025 Joke: My memory An agitated patient was stomping around the psychiatrist's office, running his hands through his hair, almost in tears. "Doctor, my memory's gone. Gone! I can't remember my wife's name. Can't remember my children's names. Can't remember what kind of car I drive. Can't remember where I work. It was all I could do to find my way here." "Calm down. How long have you been like this?" "Like what?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 22, 2025 Posted July 22, 2025 Joke: Specimen Bottle Steve had been in the hospital for days. His nurse was extremely annoying and he couldn't take much more. One day during breakfast, he took his apple juice container and used poured it into a urine specimen cup the nurse had insisted he fill. The nurse came in to check on him and looked at the specimen glass. In her annoying voice, she snickered, "It seems we are a little cloudy today." Steve put on his angry face, snatched the bottle out of her hand and drank it down in a few quick gulps, saying, "Well, I'll run it through again and maybe it will come out clearer this time." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 22, 2025 Posted July 22, 2025 Joke: Banging My bloody rude neighbour came over banging on the door at 2.00am last night. .........Luckily I was still up playing my drums!! Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 23, 2025 Posted July 23, 2025 Joke: Office Hours When I became a licensed chiropractor, I moved back to my hometown and soon had a thriving practice. One morning I saw a new patient whom I recognized as my old high school principal. "Gee," I said nervously, "I’m a little surprised to see you here." "Why?" he replied. "You certainly spent a great deal of time in my office." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 23, 2025 Posted July 23, 2025 Joke: The Worst Memory Catelin: My Mom has the worst memory. Amanda: She forgets everything? Catelin: No, she remembers everything! Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 23, 2025 Posted July 23, 2025 Joke: A fisherman returned to shore... A fisherman returned to shore with a giant marlin that was bigger and heavier than him. On the way to the cleaning shed, he ran into a second fisherman who had a stringer with a dozen baby minnows. The second fisherman looked at the marlin, turned to the first fisherman and said, "Only caught one, eh?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 23, 2025 Posted July 23, 2025 Joke: Happiest day of your life... Congratulations my boy!" said the groom's uncle. "I'm sure you'll look back and remember today as the happiest day of your life." "But I'm not getting married until tomorrow." Protested his nephew. "I know," replied the uncle. "That's exactly what I mean." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 24, 2025 Posted July 24, 2025 Joke: Two guys walking down the street ... Two guys walking down the street talking. One says to the other, "I wish I had a million dollars." The second guy says, "Oh, I'm working on my second million." "Really?" asked the first guy, surprised. "Yea, I gave up on the first million, didn't quite work out." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 24, 2025 Posted July 24, 2025 Joke: Speed Read Recipes I read recipes the same way I read science fiction... I read to the end and say, "Well, that's not going to happen." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 24, 2025 Posted July 24, 2025 Joke: A Moral Question One man said to another, "I didn't sleep with my wife before I got married. How about you?" The man replied, "I don't know. What was her maiden name?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 24, 2025 Posted July 24, 2025 Joke: Marriage counsellor Husband to counsellor: We were very happy for 22 years. Counsellor: What happened? Husband: We got married. Counsellor, turning to wife: Do you agree with your husband's assessment of your marriage? Wife: Yes, the only thing my husband and I have in common is that we were married on the same day. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 25, 2025 Posted July 25, 2025 Joke: Physical Exam The doctor has just finished giving the young man a thorough physical examination. "The best thing for you to do," the M.D. said, "is give up drinking and smoking, get to bed early and stay away from women." "Doc, I don't deserve the best," said the patient. "What's second best?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 25, 2025 Posted July 25, 2025 Joke: The will to live A man went to his lawyer and said "I would like to make a will but I don't know exactly how to go about it." The lawyer says "No problem, leave it all to me". The man looks somewhat upset ... "Well I knew you were going to take the biggest slice, but I'd like to leave a little to my children too! Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 25, 2025 Posted July 25, 2025 Joke: Greeting Card Quest A little boy had been pawing over the stock of greeting cards at a stationery store. After a few minutes the clerk became curious and asked, "Just what is it you're looking for, sonny? Birthday greeting? Message to a sick friend? Anniversary congratulations to your mom and dad?" The boy shook his head, "No." "Then what kind of card is it that you want?" asked the clerk. The boy answered wistfully, "Got anything in the line of blank report cards?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 25, 2025 Posted July 25, 2025 Joke: Getting Old You know you're getting old when... When your son's hair is turning grey. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 26, 2025 Posted July 26, 2025 Joke: Sergeant Abuse A sergeant gives a private a hard time. He says, "Private, I bet you are just waiting for me to die so you can come and urinate on my grave!" The private replied, "No sir, when I get out of the army I am not going to stand in more long, long lines!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 26, 2025 Posted July 26, 2025 Joke: Good news and bad news A woman phones up her husband at work for a chat. HIM "I'm sorry dear but I'm up to my neck in work today." HER "But I've got some good news and some bad news for you dear." HIM "OK darling, but as I've got no time now, just give me the good news." HER "Well, the air bag works." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 26, 2025 Posted July 26, 2025 Joke: Old flame... A couple was dining out when the wife noticed a familiar face at the bar. She recognized him as an old flame. "Honey," she said to her husband, as she pointed out the man, "that guy at the bar has been drinking like that since I left him seven years ago." Her husband said, "That's silly, no one celebrates that much!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 26, 2025 Posted July 26, 2025 Joke: At the butcher's shop... A man goes into a butcher's shop and says, "Have you got a sheep's head?" The butcher replies, "No, it's just the way I part my hair." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 27, 2025 Posted July 27, 2025 Joke: Typical HR "I proposed to my girlfriend last night, who just got promoted to a HR position earlier in the day." "That is cool! What did she say?" She said, "We will get back to you soon." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 27, 2025 Posted July 27, 2025 Joke: The epitaph A new widow requested the epitaph "Rest in Peace" for her husband's tombstone. When she later found he had left his fortune to his mistress, she attempted to get the engraver to change the carving. This was impossible; the words were chiselled and could not be changed. "In that case," she said, "please add, 'Till We Meet Again.'" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 27, 2025 Posted July 27, 2025 Joke: Senior Citizen A man visits his psychiatrist and talks about being haunted by visions of his departed relatives. He says; these ghosts are perched on the tops of fence posts around my garden every night. They sit there and watch me and watch me. What can I do? The psychiatrist says; that's easy … just sharpen the tops of the posts. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 27, 2025 Posted July 27, 2025 Joke: $1 bill A man offers a girl in his office $1,000 to sleep with him. “I’ll put the money on the floor, you bend down, and I’ll be done by the time you pick it up,” he explains. The girl consults her boyfriend who advises her to go ahead but to pick up the money really fast. Having not heard anything for an hour, the boyfriend calls her back. “I can hardly walk, let alone make a phone call,” the girl says. “What happened?” her boyfriend asks anxiously. “He used $1 bills.” shyc 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 28, 2025 Posted July 28, 2025 Joke: Rain Rain Go Away It’s been raining for days now and my husband seems very depressed by it... He keeps standing by the window, staring. If it continues, I’m going to have to let him in. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 28, 2025 Posted July 28, 2025 Joke: Punished One day a little girl came home from school, and said to her mother, "Mommy, today in school I was punished for something that I didn't do." The mother exclaimed, "But that's terrible! I'm going to have a talk with your teacher about this! By the way, what was it that you didn't do?" The little girl replied, "My homework." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 28, 2025 Posted July 28, 2025 oke: Two friends were standing in a... Two friends were standing in a bank when a pair of robbers entered. Not only did the thieves clean out the tills, but they walked around with bags and ordered everyone to throw their valuables in. Just as the robbers got to the pair, one of the friends turned to the other and, passing him a bill, said, "By the way, Joe, here's that twenty bucks I owe you." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 28, 2025 Posted July 28, 2025 Joke: Always on Call A doctor answers his phone and hears the familiar voice of a colleague on the other end of the line. ‘We need a fourth for poker,' said the friend. ‘I'll be right over,' whispered the doctor. As he was putting on his coat, his wife asked, ‘Is it serious?' ‘Oh yes, quite serious,' said the doctor gravely. ‘In fact, there are three doctors there already!' Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 29, 2025 Posted July 29, 2025 Joke: Heart Attack Two years after my heart attack, I was teaching my college course when I felt discomfort in my chest. I paused the class to pop my medication and felt better quickly. “Now, if I ever do have a heart attack,” I told my students, “I will give extra credit to whoever gives me CPR.” One of them shouted out, ”How much?” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 29, 2025 Posted July 29, 2025 Joke: Should Have Glasses A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license. He says "Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses." The woman answered "Well, I have contacts." The policeman replied "I don't care who you know! You're getting a ticket!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 29, 2025 Posted July 29, 2025 Joke: One morning the phone rang at ... One morning the phone rang at 3:00 a.m. in Jeff's house. He picked up the phone and a woman asked, "Is this 555-1111?" "No, this is 555-1112." Jeff replied. "Oh, I'm so sorry for disturbing you." The woman said. "That's alright," Jeff said. "I had to get up to answer the phone anyway." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 29, 2025 Posted July 29, 2025 Joke: Wrong Answer My wife asked me what my favourite time to have sex was? Apparently "when you're at work" was the wrong answer. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 30, 2025 Posted July 30, 2025 Joke: Absolutely naked woman enters ... Absolutely naked woman enters the pub. Barman looks at her very attentively. Woman: Hey, what's up? Haven't you ever seen naked woman? Barman: Well, yes I have... I'm only interested - where will you take your cash from? shyc 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
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