worldangel Posted November 24, 2018 Report Share Posted November 24, 2018 Joke: This little piggy... When my wife quit work to take care of our new baby daughter, countless hours of peek-a-boo and other games slowly took their toll. One evening my wife smacked her bare toes on the corner of a dresser and, grabbing her foot, sank to the floor. I rushed to her side and asked what she hurt. She looked at me through tear-filled eyes and managed to moan, "It's the piggy that ate roast beef." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 24, 2018 Report Share Posted November 24, 2018 Joke: The Fortune Teller A man goes to visit a fortune teller. In a dark and hazy room, peering into a crystal ball, the mystic delivered grave news. "There's no easy way to say this, so I'll just be blunt - prepare yourself to be a widow. Your wife will die a violent and horrible death this year." Visibly shaken, the man stares at the fortune teller's lined face, then at the single flickering candle, then down at her hands. He took a few deep breaths to compose himself. He simply had to know. He met the fortune-teller's gaze, steadied his voice, and asked his question: "Will I be found guilty?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 24, 2018 Report Share Posted November 24, 2018 Joke: Once poor A poor man told his wife, I am sick and tired of being poor, I am going to work overseas. So, he took off to jungle land. A few years later, he returned. As he approached his house he got stunned with the luxurious and rich look of the house. He knocked on the door, the servant opened. "Is the housewife in?" he asked. The servant replied: "Just a moment." The wife comes out: Wife: Wow, my man, all dressed up as a rich man after these years. Husband: Guess what? I am rich. Wife: How? Husband: I went to jungle land, found people walk with no underwear and sleep on sand, so I began to make and sell underwear and beds. Due to the high demand, I got rich fast. Wife: A man, with all of your strength, had to go all the way to jungle land, making beds and underwear, to get rich, and I am a little woman that stayed here, without underwear and on a single bed...I got REAL rich. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 25, 2018 Report Share Posted November 25, 2018 Joke: Blame the Paperboy A teenage girl had just been given family-car privileges. One Friday night she returned home very late from a party. The next morning her father went out to the driveway to get the newspaper and came back into the house frowning. At 11:30 am the girl sleepily walked into the kitchen, and her father asked her, "What time did you get in last night?" "Not too late, Dad," she replied nervously. Dead-panned, her father said, "Then I'll have to talk to the paperboy about putting my paper under the front tire of the car." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 25, 2018 Report Share Posted November 25, 2018 Joke: Sorry About the Weight My husband was going on a diet, but when we pulled into a fast-food restaurant, he ordered a milkshake. I pointed out that a shake isn't exactly the best snack for someone who wants to lose weight. He agreed, but he didn't change his order. The long line must have given him time to make the connection between his order and his waistline. As the woman handed him his shake, she said, "Sorry about the wait." "That's okay," he replied. "I'm going to lose it." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 25, 2018 Report Share Posted November 25, 2018 Joke: First Day of School Tommy had reached school age. His Mom worked hard to make him enthusiastic about the idea. She bought him lots of new clothes, told him of the new friends he'd meet, and so on. The first day of school, he eagerly set off. When he came back home he had a lot of glowing reports about school! Next morning his Mom woke him up saying, "Tommy, it's time to get ready for school." Tommy said, "What? Again?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 25, 2018 Report Share Posted November 25, 2018 Joke: Auction Parrot One day a man went to an auction. While there, he bid on a parrot. He really wanted this bird, so he got caught up in the bidding. He kept on bidding but kept getting outbid, so he bid higher and higher and higher. Finally, after he bid way more than he intended, he won the bid - the parrot was his at last! As he was paying for the parrot, he said to the auctioneer, "I sure hope this parrot can talk. I would hate to have paid this much for it, only to find out that he can't talk!" "Don't worry," said the auctioneer. "He can talk. Who do you think kept bidding against you? Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 25, 2018 Report Share Posted November 25, 2018 Joke: Tech Support Tech: "Hello, this is tech support. What can I help you with today?" User: (describes problem) Tech: (rattles off computer jargon) User: "Sorry, I don't understand. Can you explain what I should do as if I were a small child?" Tech: "Okay... 'Hi, could you please put your mommy on the phone?'" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 26, 2018 Report Share Posted November 26, 2018 Joke: Ever Been Bedridden? The young journalist was interviewing a woman who had just reached her hundredth birthday. “To what do you attribute your remarkable good health?” he asked. “Well,” she said, thoughtfully, I’ve always eaten moderately, worked hard, I don’t smoke or drink, and I keep good hours.” “Have you ever been bedridden?” the reporter asked. “Well, sure,” said the elderly lady, “but don’t put that in your paper.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 26, 2018 Report Share Posted November 26, 2018 Joke: The Kids Are Coming An old man in Phoenix calls his son in New York and says, "I hate to ruin you day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing, forty-five years of misery are enough". "Pop, what are you talking about?" the son screams. "We can't stand each other any longer," the old man said. "We are are sick and tired of each other, and I am sick of talking about this, so call your sister in Chicago and tell her." He hangs up. Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. "Like heck, they're not going to divorce!" she shouts. "I'II take care of this". She calls Phoenix immediately and screams at the old man, "You are NOT getting divorced! Don't do a single thing until I get there. I am calling my brother and we'll both be there tomorrow morning. Until then don't do anything. DO YOU HEAR ME?" And she hangs up. The old man hangs up the phone and turn to his wife. "Okay," he says, "they are coming for Thanksgiving and paying their own way.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 26, 2018 Report Share Posted November 26, 2018 Joke: No Gas or Needles The Smiths were shown into the dentist's office, where Mr. Smith made it clear he was in a big hurry. "No fancy stuff, doctor," he ordered. "No gas or needles or any of that stuff. Just pull the tooth and get it over with." "I wish more of my patients were as stoic as you," said the dentist admiringly. "Now, which tooth is it?" Mr. Smith turned to his wife Becky, "Show him, honey." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 26, 2018 Report Share Posted November 26, 2018 Joke: Super-Sex A little old lady was going up and down the halls in a nursing home wearing only a flimsy negligee. As she walked, she would flip up her nightgown at people and say,"Super-sex!" She walked up to an elderly man in a wheelchair. Flipping her gown at him, she said,"Super-sex!" He sat silently for a moment or two and finally answered, "I'll take the soup." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 26, 2018 Report Share Posted November 26, 2018 Joke: Bigger Than His A man is walking and sees a sign that says: "MAKE MY DONKEY LAUGH AND WIN $200!" The man thought, what the hell. He goes up to the man at the booth and asks, "How much?" The man at the booth replies, "Fifty dollars, please." He gives the $50. The man went around the wall to the donkey, whispered something into it's ear. The donkey laughed hard and laughed loud. The man had got his $200 and was on his way. The next month he was walking the same rout again, and he sees a sign that says: "MAKE MY DONKEY CRY AND WIN $200." So he walks up to the booth and again, pays the $50. He goes around the wall to the donkey and whispers something in its ear. When he comes around the donkey is balling his eyes out crying. Then the man at the booth says, " How did you make him laugh and cry?" "Well, when I made him laugh I said my penis was bigger than his. Then to make him cry, I showed him." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 27, 2018 Report Share Posted November 27, 2018 Joke: You're 88 Years Old 86 year old Mabel sat down on the porch swing at the home and said to 88 year old Charlie, "I'll bet I can guess how old you are!" Being a skeptic, he said, "Ok, I'll take the bet". She immediately unzipped his pants, stuck her hand inside, fooled around a little, then pulled her hand out and said, "You're 88 yrs. old". "How did you know that?" "You told me yesterday." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 27, 2018 Report Share Posted November 27, 2018 Joke: Two Plus Two A housewife, an accountant and a lawyer are asked, "How much is two plus two?" "Four," says the housewife. "I think it’s either three or four," says the accountant. "Let me run those figures through my spreadsheet one more time." The lawyer pulls the drapes, dims the lights, and asks in a hushed voice, "How much do you want it to be?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 27, 2018 Report Share Posted November 27, 2018 Joke: If I Had Known An elderly couple is talking to their friends after going on a date together. The man says to his friend, "If I’d have known she was a virgin, I'd have been gentler." The woman says to her friend, "If I'd known he wanted sex, I'd have taken my tights off." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 27, 2018 Report Share Posted November 27, 2018 Joke: Before He Gets Through the Door A guy staggers to the bathroom, whipping out his penis even before he gets through the door. Inadvertently, he’s wandered into the ladies room by mistake, surprising a woman primping in the mirror. “This is for ladies!” she screams. The drunk waves his dick at her and says, “So is this!” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 27, 2018 Report Share Posted November 27, 2018 Joke: Do You Know What I'm Doing? One day, a stunningly attractive woman walks into a doctor's office. As soon as the doctor lays his eyes on her, his professionalism goes right out the window. He asks her to take off her pants. He asks her to sit on the table and when she does, he starts firmly rubbing her thighs. He asks her, "Do you know what I am doing?" She replies, "Checking for abnormalities." Then, he tells her to take off her shirt and bra, and she does as she is told and he starts rubbing her breasts. Again he asks, "Do you know what I am doing?" "Checking for cancer," she replies. Then he instructs her to take her panties off, and after she does, he lays her back, pulls off his pants and underwear, jumps up on top of her and begins to have sex with her. Once again, "Do you know what I am doing?" Then, the woman answers, "Checking for herpes, that's what I am here for." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 28, 2018 Report Share Posted November 28, 2018 Joke: This Is A Special Frog A beautiful woman walks into an exotic pet store and asks about unusual pets. The young man working the counter reaches into a tank and pulls out a small frog. “This is a special frog,” he explains. “If you disrobe in front of it, it will perform oral sex.” The woman is thrilled. Three days later, the woman returns, and she is not happy. “This frog doesn’t do anything!” The young man looks baffled. “You must be doing something wrong.” “No, I’m not. I take off my clothes, and hold the frog near me, and he just stares.” “Well, let me see you try it.” Nervous, the woman complies and strips down. The frog just sits here, blinking. “Now,” the young man says to the frog while getting on his knees, “I’m only going to show you this, one more time….” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 28, 2018 Report Share Posted November 28, 2018 Joke: What's the Difference? The man walks up to the pretty lady at the end of the bar, ready with his (so believed) best pick-up line. "How do you like your eggs in the morning?" "Unfertilized," she answers casually, and then walks away. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 28, 2018 Report Share Posted November 28, 2018 Joke: Pig! A man is driving down a steep, narrow mountain road. A woman is driving up the same road. As they pass each other the woman leans out the window and yells, "Pig!" The man immediately leans out his window and replies with, "BITCH!" They each continue on their way, as the man rounds the next corner he crashes into a pig in the middle of the road. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 28, 2018 Report Share Posted November 28, 2018 Joke: Eggs In the Morning The man walks up to the pretty lady at the end of the bar, ready with his (so believed) best pick-up line. "How do you like your eggs in the morning?" "Unfertilized," she answers casually, and then walks away. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 28, 2018 Report Share Posted November 28, 2018 Joke: Is That Hard to Maintain? An extremely attractive, young, 'Lady of the Evening' walked into the hotel bar. She was immediately stunned by the most attractive man (sitting at the bar) she had ever seen, tall, blond hair, rippling muscles, and the face of Adonis. It took a few minutes, for her to gather her wits, and approach this amazing man. "Buy a girl a drink?" she cooed. "Sure", he replied, "Especially for one as pretty as YOU!" Thanking her lucky stars, she engaged him in conversation. After some time he got around to the question of the night. "Darling", he replied "I would love to spend the night with you and, no, money is no object. But, you see, I am saving myself for the woman I truly love and for our wedding night." "My, what an admirable attitude," she replied. "That must be terribly hard to maintain." "Not really," he replied, "but it is really driving my wife nuts!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 29, 2018 Report Share Posted November 29, 2018 Joke: The Best to Operate On Four doctors were talking to each other about who was the best patient to operate on. The first doctor said, "The best person to operate on are librarians cause everything inside them is in alphabetical order." Disagreeing, the second doctor announced that mechanics were the best to operate on because they understand if you've got parts left over when you’re done. The third Doctor replied, “No, no, you are both wrong. A technician is the best cause everything inside is color coded." "Excuse me!” broke in the fourth doctor, “The best to operate on are politicians. They have no guts, no spine, and the head and rear are interchangeable." Steve5380 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 29, 2018 Report Share Posted November 29, 2018 Joke: Sucking My Thumb Once in the middle of the night two little boys got up to get some water from the kitchen. On their way past their parent’s bedroom they heard a funny sound coming out from there. The oldest boy looked into the keyhole. He backed up and said, "I can't believe it!” The younger brother looked in afterwards and said, "And she yells at me for sucking my thumb!” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 29, 2018 Report Share Posted November 29, 2018 Joke: Your Relatives? A couple driving on a countryside road were in the midst of a fight. While driving, they came across a farm with some pigs. The husband points to one of the pigs and asks the woman, "Your relatives?" The wife says, "Yes, my in-laws." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 29, 2018 Report Share Posted November 29, 2018 Joke: A Dear Friend of Mine During class, a teacher was trying to teach good manners. The teacher asks the students, "Michael, if you were on a date, having supper with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?" "Just a minute, I have to go piss." "That would be rude and impolite. What about you John, how would you say it?" "I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom, I'll be right back." "That's better, but it's still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the table. And you Peter, are you able to use your intelligence for once and show us your good manners?" "I would say, 'Darling, please excuse me for a moment. I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope you'll get to meet after supper." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 29, 2018 Report Share Posted November 29, 2018 Joke: I Don't Have A Prescription A man walks into the pharmacy and whisper to the young lady, "Can I have a box of Viagra?" The clerk, very loud, replied, "We don't sell Viagra without prescription." To play on the clerk’s sympathy the man pulls his pants down and says, “I don’t have a prescription, but I have the patient.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 30, 2018 Report Share Posted November 30, 2018 Joke: I Think I Have A Concussion A blonde was in a car crash. She says to the paramedic, "I think I have concussion!” The paramedic says, "How many fingers do I have up?" The blonde replies, " OH SHIT! I'M PARALYZED TOO!!!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 30, 2018 Report Share Posted November 30, 2018 Joke: Inactive for Quite Some Time An honored army general was at the doctor’s office for a checkup. At one point during the exam the doctor said, “If you don’t mind my asking, sir, when was the last time you had sex?” “Of course, I understand, medical reasons and all that,” the general answered. “I would say approximately 1975.” “So you’ve been inactive for quite some time?” “You think so?” the general said, checking his watch. “It’s only 2140 now.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 30, 2018 Report Share Posted November 30, 2018 Joke: Dropping A Bomb A guy asks his friend, "If you knew that they were about to drop an atomic bomb, what’s the first thing you would do?" "I would screw the first thing that moved! What would you do?" The first guy says, "I would stand very still for at least half an hour." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 30, 2018 Report Share Posted November 30, 2018 Joke: Did They Chop Your Firewood? "I'm calling to report about my neighbor Billy Bob Smith! He is hiding marijuana inside his firewood." "Thank you very much for the tip, sir." The next day, the FBI agents descend on Billy Bob's house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood, but find no marijuana. They swore at Billy Bob and left. The phone rings at Billy Bob's house. "Hey, Billy Bob! Did the FBI come?" "Yeah!" "Did they chop your firewood?" "Yep." "Happy Birthday, Buddy!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted November 30, 2018 Report Share Posted November 30, 2018 Joke: "Viens A Moi" Two women at a department store stopped at the perfume counter and picked up a sample bottle. One sprayed the perfume on her wrist and smelled it. “That’s nice, isn’t it?” Kim said waving her arm under her friend’s nose. “Yeah, what’s it called?” “Viens a moi.” “Viens a moi? What’s that mean?” A clerk offered some help. “Viens a moi, ladies, is French for ‘come to me.’” Kim took another sniff. “That doesn’t smell like come to me,” she said, offering her arm to her friend again. “Does that smell like come to you?” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted December 1, 2018 Report Share Posted December 1, 2018 Joke: Do You Sell Vibrators? A little old lady, shaking violently as she walks in to the pharmacy, asks the salesperson, "Do you sell vibrators?" Surprised by the request, the sales person says, "Yes, we do." The little old lady says, "Well, how do you turn the damn things off?!?!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted December 1, 2018 Report Share Posted December 1, 2018 Joke: Delivery Only At a party, an obstetrician’s wife noticed another guest, a large oversexed woman, making advances to her husband. She tried to ignore it until they disappeared into a bedroom together. Immediately she rushed into the room, pulled the two apart and yelled, “Look, lady! My husband just delivers babies, he doesn’t install them!” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted December 1, 2018 Report Share Posted December 1, 2018 Joke: Not So Bad A masked gunman walks into a sperm bank, he points the gun at the woman behind the counter and tells her to drink the sample in front of her. The man puts the gun to her head and says, "I said drink that sample or I’ll kill you!" So she does. Just then he takes off his mask and says, "See honey, it's not so bad." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted December 1, 2018 Report Share Posted December 1, 2018 Joke: I'm Bending Over Two kids decided to dress up as a cow for Halloween. After hours of arguing who was going to be the head and the rear, they decided to flip a coin and the argument was settled. While crossing a farmer’s field in their costume the boy that was in the rear says, "What's that snort you are making?" The boy in the front says, "I'm not snorting," and swings his big cow head around and spots this huge bulls racing towards them. He says, "Don’t panic! But we got a problem behind us coming up fast... It’s a big bull." After a second or two the kid in the rear says, "What are we going to do?" The kid in the front replies, "I don't know about you, but I'm going to bend over and eat some grass." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted December 1, 2018 Report Share Posted December 1, 2018 the 27,000 post Joke: Man's Perfect Breakfast Many a person would ask what is a man's perfect breakfast. This is when an English breakfast is set before him with fresh orange juice. On his right is the Vogue and his daughter is smiling happily on front. On his left his very successful son on the Time's cover. Then when he opens the middle page of the Playboy, he finds his girlfriend on it, and while he throws some more milk in to his coffee, he sees his wife's face on the carton. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted December 2, 2018 Report Share Posted December 2, 2018 Joke: She's A Virgin A boy came running up to his father and said, "Daddy, Daddy, I’ve met the woman I want to marry!" The father says, "Tell me about her, son." The son says, "Well, she’s pretty, she can cook, and Daddy, Daddy, she's a virgin!" The father says, "Well son, if she isn’t good enough for their family, then she isn’t good enough for ours." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted December 2, 2018 Report Share Posted December 2, 2018 Joke: The Genie Two guys are in a locker room after their racquetball match when one guy notices the other has a cork in his ass. “If you don’t mind me saying,” said the second, “the cork looks terribly uncomfortable. Why don’t you take it out?” “I can’t,” lamented the first man. “It’s permanent.” “I don’t understand,” said the second. "Well," says the first guy, “I was walking along the beach and I tripped over an oil lamp. There was a puff of smoke, and then a huge man in a turban came oozing out. He said, 'I am the Genie. I can grant you one wish.' And I said, ‘No shit.’” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted December 2, 2018 Report Share Posted December 2, 2018 Joke: Brush Up My Sign Language A man asks his friend, "How did your date with the deaf nymphomaniac go last night?" "Pretty good," the man replies. "But I need to brush up on my sign language." "Why do you say that?" "They kicked us out of the restaurant when I asked her if she likes the taste of gum." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted December 2, 2018 Report Share Posted December 2, 2018 Joke: He Doesn't Have to Run A guy goes to his first baseball game. He caught on quickly. Every time the hitter would swing and get a hit, every one would start yelling, "RUN! RUN!" Then one runner started walking to 1st, and the guy stands up and yells, "Run you lazy bastard! Run!" The kid sitting next to him says he can’t run. The guys asks, "Why not?" The kid then explains that the batter had 4 balls. Then the guy stands up and yells, "Walk proudly man!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted December 2, 2018 Report Share Posted December 2, 2018 Joke: The GREAT Dentist A guy and a girl met at a restaurant. They're getting along so well that they decide to go to the girl's place. A few drinks later, the guy takes off his shirt and washes his hands. He then takes off his pants and washes his hands. So the girl looks at him and says, "You must be a dentist?" The guy, surprised, says, "Yes, how did you figure that out?" The girl replies, "Easy, you keep washing your hands." One thing led to another and they make love. After they were done, the girl says, "You must be a GREAT dentist!" The guy says, "Yes, I sure am a great dentist. How did you figure that out?" "Easy... I didn't feel a thing." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted December 3, 2018 Report Share Posted December 3, 2018 Joke: High Fence Tire of having to stare at the gorgeous young kitten on the other side of the chain link fence, bold Spot Tomcat decide to visit her one afternoon. Settling back on his haunches, he gave a mighty leap and landed on the other side. Impressed, the lovely cat strolled over. “That was quite a leap,” she remarked. “Want to go somewhere and cuddle?” “I’m afraid not,” said Spot, a hurt expression on his face. “The fence was higher that I thought.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted December 3, 2018 Report Share Posted December 3, 2018 Joke: Why Did You Do That? An elderly couple was sitting on there rocking chairs rocking back and forth. The woman then whacked her husband as hard as she could right off his chair. Surprised and disorientated he said, "Now why did you do that?" She replied, "That is for 50 years of horrible sex!" So he sits back down and thinks about it for a while, and pretty soon you hear another whack. This time the wife falls off the chair and soon, gets back up and says, "What was that for?” He replied, "That is for knowing the difference." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted December 3, 2018 Report Share Posted December 3, 2018 Joke: Just Ignore Him A guy and his girlfriend went to see an X-rated movie. About half way through the movie she nudged him and said the guy next to her was jerking off real fast and hard. Her boyfriend told her to just ignore him. She said, “I can’t, he is using my hand.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted December 3, 2018 Report Share Posted December 3, 2018 Joke: Forget My Wife Two guys, one a senior and one young, are pushing their carts around Home Depot when they collide. The old guy says to the young guy. “Sorry about that. I’m looking for my wife, and I guess I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.” The young guy says, “That’s okay. It’s a coincidence. I’m looking for my wife, too. I can’t find her and I’m getting a bit anxious.” The old guy says, “Well maybe we can help each other. What does your wife look like?" The young guy says, “She is 28 years-old, tall, with brown hair, blue eyes, long legs, big boobs, and she’s wearing tight white shorts. What does your wife look like?” The old guy says, “Doesn’t matter, let’s look for yours.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted December 3, 2018 Report Share Posted December 3, 2018 Joke: The Right Word A doctor tries to convince him but the man won't listen. All he keeps on saying is, "I want to get castrated! I want to get castrated! I want to get castrated!” The doctor says, "Your life will be changed after this operation. Do you still want to go ahead?" “Yes!" After a few hours the man is walking in the hospital with a walking stick in his hand and legs apart. He meets another man walking the same way. He says to the other guy, “So even you got the operation done?" The other man replied, "Yeah after 37 years of my life, I felt that it would be much better to get circumcised." "Crap. That’s the word!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted December 4, 2018 Report Share Posted December 4, 2018 Joke: The Hole of the World A suspicious acting man arrives at airport and is going through customs. He becomes extremely irate when the customs inspector insists on searching his bags. He screams at the inspector, “this airport is the asshole of the world!” “And I take it,” replies the inspector, “that you are just passing through?” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted December 4, 2018 Report Share Posted December 4, 2018 Joke: These Pills Don't Work A young woman marches into her doctor’s office and slams her prescription of birth control pills on his desk. The doctor asks, "What's wrong?" "These things don't work!" replied the lady. "Why not?" asked the doctor. "They keep falling out!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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