Lesson Learnt - Extorted while cruising in Toliet

[Guest bleah]

I know its not right to go cruise in toilets.

I was soo sexed up that i went to cruise at a MRT Toilet. I fell in a trap of a straight guy. He threatened to report me to the police etc...

I was too scared to react. He asked how much i had. He wanted me to withdraw all the money i had. I am only a student so only had less than $500. He took it and said i could go. But no. it didnt end there. He told me to give him my phone. I really didnt want to do that but had no choice. He let me transfer my contacts to memory card.

And he walked away with my money and phone. I really thought this would ever happen to me. But it did. I am at loss now. I dont feel like going out of my house. Scared that he might have followed or wait for me at the MRT again.

I know he is going to sell my phone. I have the Android app "PREY in it. Should i activate it now or should i wait for him to sell my phone and than activate it????

I learnt my lesson Am also going to ban myself from watching pxxn on the net. :(

Anyone out there who cruises in public. Please dont do it.

[Guest Guest]

U r still a student so he is at a losing end. It takes both hands to clap (in the cruising act) & u must not give in further. He already committed a crime - extortion & misleading a minor. U haven't.

U shld tell him to return the money & phone. Go with another frd (or frds) when meeting him. Tell him u will go to police if he doesn't do so. U won't get into trouble if u report to police because nothing happened except his extortion

[Guest bleah]

U r still a student so he is at a losing end. It takes both hands to clap (in the cruising act) & u must not give in further. He already committed a crime - extortion & misleading a minor. U haven't.

U shld tell him to return the money & phone. Go with another frd (or frds) when meeting him. Tell him u will go to police if he doesn't do so. U won't get into trouble if u report to police because nothing happened except his extortion

i cant NO ONE KNOWS THAT I;M GAY :( i have no gay friends. worse. He left wit my money and phone and i have no way to contact him. He also looks like he wouldnt leave without a physical fight :( its true that hes in the losing end but its a big risk for me

Edited August 10, 2011 by bleah

[Guest go report it. NOW]

I learnt my lesson Am also going to ban myself from watching pxxn on the net. :( ...

I think you should go to the police. Yes, don't let this kind of people bully you! But of course, you would have to be frank to the police about it!

[Guest Ironrod]

WTF! Go to police now! it's your words AGAINST his words!! SAY U GOT ROB IN THE TOLIET [which I think u have]

This is really WTF! Unless he has a video that u cruising him remember it's YOUR WORDS AGAINST HIS.

DON'T be so stupid K?

[Guest Kev <3 U]

He doesn't know your gay, so just walk away, rrun... or you can run to the police to report

Or ask him to show evidence...

[Guest bleah]

its easy to say but really difficult to do :(

i am really in the closet and really dont want to risk it outing myself :( i am at lost here. I dont have any gay friends and can only talk abt here

For now i can only tell myself that this has happened. Move on and me cautious. But its really really hard.

He know i;m gay cos i erm cruised him... seeeeee my faultttttttttt.....

you know whats worse. I have to smile to my family and friends as if nothing happened

Edited August 10, 2011 by bleah

[Guest Kev <3 U]

May I ask a question?

How big/physical is he?

You know you can report to police too, it's against the law to threaten people and you both will be even.

[deceptiveeyes.deceivingminds]

Bleah, calm down.

Sorry that you had to face such a traumatic episode but it looks like to me this guy had intended to lure you in the first place even though you are highly sexed up.

As we do not know what transpired between you and the guy, it is difficult for any of us to advise you what you should do next.

Your monetary loss is regrettable and as much as it is wrong for that guy to do it to you. It is difficult for you to lodge a report without giving the truthful picture of what took place.

I would encourage you to just forget about the whole incident. Just let your parents know you lost your mobile phone maybe at school or somewhere outside e.g. sports complex and only left you with your SIM card.

You sound like a young chap less than 16 yo and it is totally understandable that you are badly shaken by the whole episode. Don't be too hard on yourself. It was an unfortunate incident.

[Guest bleah]

May I ask a question?

How big/physical is he?

You know you can report to police too, it's against the law to threaten people and you both will be even.

okay he not tall or big ...just regular body. The way he talk is like he would beat you up. I was just in the vulnerable situation.

[Guest bleah]

Bleah, calm down.

Sorry that you had to face such a traumatic episode but it looks like to me this guy had intended to lure you in the first place even though you are highly sexed up.

As we do not know what transpired between you and the guy, it is difficult for any of us to advise you what you should do next.

Your monetary loss is regrettable and as much as it is wrong for that guy to do it to you. It is difficult for you to lodge a report without giving the truthful picture of what took place.

I would encourage you to just forget about the whole incident. Just let your parents know you lost your mobile phone maybe at school or somewhere outside e.g. sports complex and only left you with your SIM card.

You sound like a young chap less than 16 yo and it is totally understandable that you are badly shaken by the whole episode. Don't be too hard on yourself. It was an unfortunate incident.

thanks...Am not tooooo young :s yeah have to come up with a story at home. i just need to go somewhere and just yell out.

[deceptiveeyes.deceivingminds]

Bleah, regardless of our orientation, what the person had done is accountable to an act of robbery.

Did you touch him anywhere physically when you tried to cruise him or did you show him your erection and perhaps you smiled to him?

There are a lot of unknown circumstantial facts we do not know.

If you were only cruising him by showing him a hard on and a smile, it is debatable that you were only being cheeky and it does not amount to cruising or any indecent proposal. Having a hardon in public and especially in a toilet is not a crime. It could happen to any healthy male who may have had experienced or thinking about something erotic.

I would encourage you to lodge a report if you did not touch him and what took place was purely out of intimidation and you felt threatened.

Do not attempt to paint what did not take place or paint it as an attempted robbery because what is not real or did not happen will backfire.

He can accuse you of cruising him but as long as you did not touch him. He has no right whatsoever to take your mobile phone and money.

[Smexy]

If I were you I will punch his balls so hard he will cry out loud...

[Guest IamPineapple]

I was just reading forum while waiting for my anime to load and just at the right time saw your post.

from your short description from the top, i could read they you had been robbed.

You could report to police because he just committed 2 crime

- First is extort money from a student

- Threaten to commit any physical injuries if not comply

When your reporting to police, please do describe the person's feature(s) to police like how tall, what he wear or what race is he in to help the police to catch this person, i personally think your not in the wrong.

Please also do state the Time of occurrence

Don't delay anymore, action has to be taken as you might not be the first victim.

It's all under the Law, After-all, I am just a student which is interested in Law and Psychology, i guess i had a good heart for situation like this

Edited August 10, 2011 by IamPineapple

[Guest bleah]

But even if i go to the police now, would it mean that i WAS guilty of my mistakes since i have given in to hand over my cash and phone?

Thanks guys for the advice. Really do appreciate it.

Will be away for a while now to be alone. Will update again later tonight...

[deceptiveeyes.deceivingminds]

Everyone reacts differently in a situation. It does not mean if you report immediately you are not guilty and neither should a delayed report be deemed as the person being guilty and hence delayed in reporting it.

You will hear a lot more guys who will tell you how they would have punched the living daylight out of that person but you didn't do it. Don't be hard on yourself. Everyone reacts differently. You had your own reason.

All you need to know now is when you make a report:

1. You need to be truthful

2. Be clear about how you want to tell the incident and make sure you don't have more than 1 version. If you decided to come clean you were feeling naughty and jerking off in a empty toilet...stick with it! If you are planning to say you have an exceptional large dick and you were merely flinging off the last urine drop, make sure you don't change your story!!

3. Again, you need to be truthful. You don't need to paint a different picture to make it any more unnecessarily difficult for yourself.

Good luck.

Take care.

[Guest IamPineapple]

But even if i go to the police now, would it mean that i WAS guilty of my mistakes since i have given in to hand over my cash and phone?

Thanks guys for the advice. Really do appreciate it.

Will be away for a while now to be alone. Will update again later tonight...

Your not guilty of anything, you are a victim remember that... and if you delay any further, your just letting the person slipping by your fears and giving him a chance to escape.

As i said, you might not be the first victim of this robbery, there could be many others who could had already or might be fallen into this robbery.

[patisoy]

This has happened to me before in Tanah Merah MRT. It happened in the morning right after the rush hours. There was a 20+ Malay guy at the urinal (2 urinals apart from me) who kept on touching himself and showed me his hard-on. He signalled me to join him inside the cubicle. I followed him and locked the door. I asked him to suck for me but he didn't want to do it. He also didn't want me to suck for him. He just gave me hand in masturbating but he was beating my dick so hard that I couldn't feel any pleasure but pain. I told him to stop it and tucked my cock back inside my pants. When I tried to open the door, he blocked my way out and demanded that I give him some money. I gave him all I had inside my wallet (luckily, it's only about 30 dollars). He was not happy and said that it's not enough. I told him that it was all I had. He demanded that I should hand him my iPhone but my iPhone was only few months old that time. It was a very new unit. Of course, I refused to give it to him. He got upset and gave me this scary look. I pushed him on the wall and shouted at him (hoping that there were other people inside the toilet who can help me). I showed him an angry face and about to start a fist fight. When I wanted to punch him on the face, he gave way and allowed me to open the door and leave. My heart was pounding really fast and left as fast as I can. There was no one else inside te toilet. That was a traumatic experience for me but it helped that I can defend myself.

I think in your case it was different and you were helpless. You can actually report the incident with the police but your life will become an open book when you make your statement. You will have to relive the experience and tell all the details during investigation. Your family will be dragegd into the picture and the situation will become more stressful & traumatic. If you pursue the case, the police can trace the whereabouts of that guy because the MRT stations have CCTV cameras. You will just have to describe that person including the clothes he wore and the exact time of the incident. It's your choice.

But if I were you, I will just have to forget that it happened and strive to move on. You had enough trauma already and I'm sure you intend to keep your real identity as a personal secret this time. The last thing that you want now is to open a can of worms. You can still earn back the 500 dollars and can easily tell your parents that you lost your phone. Like most people say, just charge the whole thing into experience. Try to do something relaxing to ease your trauma. Be very careful next time....

[fab]

My fd had exactly the same experience.

He went to the police and they supported him though they did tell him about the usual laws against public sex etc.

Nevertheless, they laid an ambush at the guy who blackmailed my fd.

Be strong, report it. If u need any companion, I m sure, the forumers here wont be most willing to acompany u.

Dont delay anymore.

[Guest bleah]

A big thank you for all the advice.

My heart is really not strong enough to report it to the police.

Like what PATISOY mentioned"

But if I were you, I will just have to forget that it happened and strive to move on. You had enough trauma already and I'm sure you intend to keep your real identity as a personal secret this time. The last thing that you want now is to open a can of worms. You can still earn back the 500 dollars and can easily tell your parents that you lost your phone. Like most people say, just charge the whole thing into experience. Try to do something relaxing to ease your trauma. Be very careful next time.... "

Thats exactly what I was thinking the whole evening. I always take the train from the same train station. I am praying I wouldnt bump into him.

If i do, what can he do? threaten me again? If he does, I think it would be time for me to stop hiding and let the authorities handle it.

If anyone experienced a similar ordeal, please do tell me. It might end up being the same guy.

I just cant believe that it happened to me....

[MarriedTop]

It happened to me last year. The indian chap seduced me. We went into toilet and he refused to do anything to me. I was turned off. He asked for some money else will expose my ID. I just rejected him and walked out. But in fact, my heart beat was terribly high and fast. Why there are someone taking advantage over us...

[snowball]

Why there are someone taking advantage over us...

you dare to say you never take advantage of others before?

针没刺到自己肉不知疼而已

understood your fears at that moment, however black sheep are everywhere,

luckily you have nothing to lose & you are safe :thumb:

Edited August 10, 2011 by snowball

[robin64]

有sauna不去，且要在公共厕所胡搞，贪刺激...结果呢？................偷鸡不着蚀把米！

[Guest be strong]

Well, there are much much more similar cases like yours.

Some AJ just touch on their body, then got blackmailed, they hint you by saying:"So, how you want to settle this?"

Then it is your "willingness" to pay the compensation.

As in your case, you can use your gangster power to threaten him back, because 黑吃黑, no one can blames each other, he just cant go to report as if he really does, what can he say? He blackmailed you and you threaten him back?

Hm.. you are kinda soft, which I do not think you are able to do that.

Just make yourself clear for any possible path:

report to police -> yes? ->no?

calling gangster to settle -> yes? ->no?

pretend nothing happen, just make a story of phone missing -> yes? ->no?

meet him again, pretend do not know anything -> yes? ->no?

cut your hair, change your appearance -> yes? ->no?

[fab]

How old r u?

Y do u wanna let the bastard takes advantage of u being gay?

Just go to the police and said u have been robbed.

Spare the details if u r not ready. That bastard is equally guilty (for public cruising) as u, if not more.

The bastard who blackmailed my fd was imprisonment for at least a good 5 yrs.

But even if i go to the police now, would it mean that i WAS guilty of my mistakes since i have given in to hand over my cash and phone?

Thanks guys for the advice. Really do appreciate it.

Will be away for a while now to be alone. Will update again later tonight...

[boyzbe81]

How old r u?

Y do u wanna let the bastard takes advantage of u being gay?

Just go to the police and said u have been robbed.

Spare the details if u r not ready. That bastard is equally guilty (for public cruising) as u, if not more.

The bastard who blackmailed my fd was imprisonment for at least a good 5 yrs.

Let him make the decision ba. In the end, we can provide decision and support but the final decision is still to be made by TS.

Have a great day ahead TS.

[Guest Guest]

Bleach, I have my empathy. No many how many times u replay this incident in ur mind, thought about how u would have escaped I u did this or that, or if u did not act on your carnal call, the reality is that it happened and u were bruised. And sometimes it has nothing to do with age or intelligence. Just look at those smart US congressmen who were caught in their illicit acts. Don't think they are stupid, were they? Write it off, tell urself yes one never knows if luck turns against us so be safe than be sorry.

Just in case u wonder, I have has my own brush earlier this year. My first time despite my well oiled experience in toilet cruising for decades, since I was a teenager.

Saw this cute mainland Chinese guy, he led me to a cafe toilet, allowed me to fxxk him. After I came he took the condom, put it in an envelope and said that would be his evidence if I did not give him money. I resisted but he said he was poor, nothing to lose even if he were arrested. I finally gave Hom $200 and he dashed off.

I was shaken by the experience not so much for the extortion but that I did not see it coming. I wrote the money off as paid sex, but yes the toilets have since lost its allure. A small price to pay for riding my addiction.

Yes put the experience behind you and live ur life.

[Guest guest]

thanks...Am not tooooo young :s yeah have to come up with a story at home. i just need to go somewhere and just yell out.

Extortion :penal code 383 A threatens to report victim he cruise in the toliet , unless victim gives him money. A has committed exortion. Charges : whoever commits extortion shall be punished with imprisonment for a term or with fine or with whipping . if cruise in the toliet and were not caught red handed than u a free man. Do anything u want in public but dun get caught.so if i were u report him to police , before he use the same trick on another innocent guy.

[Guest innocent student]

thanks...Am not tooooo young :s yeah have to come up with a story at home. i just need to go somewhere and just yell out.

next thing is u a student. now is words against words. tell the police u were cruise by him and he extort money and phone from u. your winning is 100 per cent cause u still a student. the police sure to believe u. just wear yr school uniform to the police station and act innocent. furthermore there is no witnesses in this case.

[glx88]

Just a thought. Could this guy already know that the MRT was a cruising ground and was already planning to rob someone cruising him? I kinda feel like that if a straight person is suddenly confronted with a situation like this, his 1st instinct shouldn't be trying to extort or rob anyone, especially a student. This smells of entrapment and this bastard already plan to mislead u all along. Many hate crimes against lgbt people like this happen frequently. (sadly i dont think there are laws protecting victims of such incident locally)

I hope things turns out for the better for u bleah.

[briax]

I know its not right to go cruise in toilets.

I was soo sexed up that i went to cruise at a MRT Toilet. I fell in a trap of a straight guy. He threatened to report me to the police etc...

I was too scared to react. He asked how much i had. He wanted me to withdraw all the money i had. I am only a student so only had less than $500. He took it and said i could go. But no. it didnt end there. He told me to give him my phone. I really didnt want to do that but had no choice. He let me transfer my contacts to memory card.

And he walked away with my money and phone. I really thought this would ever happen to me. But it did. I am at loss now. I dont feel like going out of my house. Scared that he might have followed or wait for me at the MRT again.

I know he is going to sell my phone. I have the Android app "PREY in it. Should i activate it now or should i wait for him to sell my phone and than activate it????

I learnt my lesson Am also going to ban myself from watching pxxn on the net. :(

Anyone out there who cruises in public. Please dont do it.

Drop me an email at bryan@oogachaga.com. We can see if any lawyer can give you a good advice on what to do.

[Guest Dcky]

It happened to me last year. The indian chap seduced me. We went into toilet and he refused to do anything to me. I was turned off. He asked for some money else will expose my ID. I just rejected him and walked out. But in fact, my heart beat was terribly high and fast. Why there are someone taking advantage over us...

Hi marriedtop, pls add me as ur frnd and pls mail me at indianajone7@hotmail.com

[abang]

I am so sorry to read about your current predicament.

When I was in my 20s, yes those days the cruising was done in the open areas of Plaza Singapura and Shaw Cinemas, aka Lido, Jade and Prince.

Perhaps I was naive then but it did not cross my mind that I could have been a victim of such circumstances. Looking back, I really dont understand why I was so brave then. Of course as I get older (wiser?), I avoided such places as I did not want to lose my job.

In my late 20s to late 30s, I was a regular at the now defunct Fort Road Beach. I counted myself lucky when the police "cottaged" and raided the place in 1993 as I was overseas during that particular period.

Now, I would advise you to get the phone back.

Edited August 13, 2011 by abang

[oralb]

Bleah:

Can you tell us what did you do in the toliet? The detailed the better, for example, did u touch him? did he give u signal? did he touch you? did he give you verbal confirmation? how old is he? how old are you?

yes ultimately I know you are discreet and the decision to report this is up to you. but let me ask you this, do you use the MRT regularly? what if one day you bump into him again, and he threaten you again, what will you do?

Also how old are you, if you are under a certain age (which you are not suppose to be here, but I will make it an exception on this) you can ask the court to withhold your contact information should this case reported and go on court.

You can walk away from all this, but do remember that guy may be doing to others, what he had done on you.

[Tommykid]

its sad to hear about this.

I hope you can drop briax an email and seek legal advise. We shouldn't be bullied by people like that.

[Guest hongjunnan]

sorry to heard that, trust me, i think u should report to the police, i know whats ur concern, scared that ur parent will know what 'exactly happen' during the incident, but look, since it already happened, what you can do, is to help your self, if u really dont have the courage to report to police, i will advise you to seek help from LGBT community, i am sure they will help you okay?

hope to receive good news from you soon

*jiayou*

[Mercutio]

It happened to me last year. The indian chap seduced me. We went into toilet and he refused to do anything to me. I was turned off. He asked for some money else will expose my ID. I just rejected him and walked out. But in fact, my heart beat was terribly high and fast. Why there are someone taking advantage over us...

You'd be surprised. I had a guy accost me once, claiming to be security. We were in a quiet stairwell and as he was going through his threats, I was processing - no badge, no pass, what is he going on about, why are we here and why am I not being hauled to the office ... I realized where this was going, gave him the finger and walked away.

It's not just non PLUs who will take advantage.

[Guest Martin]

I know its not right to go cruise in toilets.

I was soo sexed up that i went to cruise at a MRT Toilet. I fell in a trap of a straight guy. He threatened to report me to the police etc...

I was too scared to react. He asked how much i had. He wanted me to withdraw all the money i had. I am only a student so only had less than $500. He took it and said i could go. But no. it didnt end there. He told me to give him my phone. I really didnt want to do that but had no choice. He let me transfer my contacts to memory card.

And he walked away with my money and phone. I really thought this would ever happen to me. But it did. I am at loss now. I dont feel like going out of my house. Scared that he might have followed or wait for me at the MRT again.

I know he is going to sell my phone. I have the Android app "PREY in it. Should i activate it now or should i wait for him to sell my phone and than activate it????

I learnt my lesson Am also going to ban myself from watching pxxn on the net. :(

Anyone out there who cruises in public. Please dont do it.

How can i keep in touch with you. See how can I help you. Dont need to be all alone. Any e mail etc..

[GachiMuchi]

How can i keep in touch with you. See how can I help you. Dont need to be all alone. Any e mail etc..

Why must he post his email? why can't you sign-in as a member and drop him a Private Message, if you are genuine in wanting to help.

[Jak09]

let bryan help u..=)

for a student, $500 is a lot of money..

do it quick, if not after he sell ur phone, i think the prey app will also be gone..

[Guest bleah]

edited

Edited August 14, 2011 by bleah

[stars]

Honestly, you're a student. Go to the police, explain what happened. They don't need to know you were cruising. You could just say you were looking around innocently.

You have to stand up for yourself. That bastard needs to pay.

[Guest bleah]

Hi guys,

Just want to do a quick update on what happened so far since you guys were advising me.

I made a police report yesterday night. I did it online because was still scared to go down to police station. BUT. I had police knocking my house door at 5am plus. I had a heart attack. They just wanted to inform me to call some officer and they left since i didnt provide a phone number.

I told people that i lost my phone.

I had to go down to police station to make an official report on what happened. Told them what I could remember and left.

So now I am at ease a little since that I know I did the right thing by reporting to the police. But I just hope they dont come knocking on my door again and exposing to the whole world what happened to me.

[Guest guest]

i believe the police will appoint u a IO officer to follow up. cctv at the mrt can help in the ivestigation if u gave them the date and time. my friend who cruise at the toliet was charge because they have evidence from the cctv showing him walk ing in and out the toliet. next when the suspect was caught , u need to identify him behind a glass room .good luck and take care.

[bigis4me]

I can relate to your fear but i did not do what you did. It happen very long ago in the old Plaza Singapura . I was in the toilet with another guy and we did hear anything or anybody in the next cubicle. Suddenly he appeared from the top and shouted to us of what we were doing and man i was so scared. I felt my world was lost and was thinking now i will have a police record. The guy kept shouting for us to give him our I/C and told us to get out. The other guy with me just said we wont give . He went down from the wall and told us to get out and meet him outside. Actually that was his mistake as now he didnt have anything on us but his word. So after a while then we went out of the cubicle and he was not there and so what we did was just run out as fast we could and not look back. I have told some of my friends about what happen and they did tell me that there are some guys who arent policemen but want to scare people like us. So what i am trying to say is as long he dont have any evidence against you its just his word against yours and next time try not to cruise as there are so many saunas around which are safer or if ever you get caught again (which i hope you dont) just bolt away or stand up for your rights but best thing is not to do ity again.

[happy.99]

since you are a minor, then better for you. you have to report it so that others won't fall victim!

[Guest bleah]

i believe the police will appoint u a IO officer to follow up. cctv at the mrt can help in the ivestigation if u gave them the date and time. my friend who cruise at the toliet was charge because they have evidence from the cctv showing him walk ing in and out the toliet. next when the suspect was caught , u need to identify him behind a glass room .good luck and take care.

eek you just freaked me out a little.....your friend was charged?

[lovehandle]

U told the police u were cruising and get blackmailing?

[Guest elgar90]

thanks...Am not tooooo young :s yeah have to come up with a story at home. i just need to go somewhere and just yell out.

Hi, the law is against him not you.

He extorted money and phone from you. Assuming that you are a minor under the age of 18.

Unless he has verbal or video evidence that you are cruising, you can sue him or report him to the police. you must make it asap.

Btw, did you give him the money at the atm??? if so, the atm should have video evidence that the money was given to him!

[kennethhost]

No evident don't need to scare of him la..... Amazing this guy, student also wanna bully... Shame on that F**ker