Wide Age Gap Relationship + R/ship Btw A Younger And Older Guy + Does Age Matters In A R/ship? (Compiled)

[Guest tutt]

my partner and i 25 years age difference and going 8 years and going.........

[snowball]

is normal that the top is much much older than the btm, how about young top & much older btm?

any readers here like to share?

[Guest Hornieted]

My partner n I r 22 yrs apart n tog for 35 years .. Wre r veri blessed .. Thank God

[Guest guest]

Ya, it is quite common to have older guy top and young bottom. It seems a trend now that younger guy looking for more mature and older guy as companion. I guessed for stability and understanding. The only problem is, if age gap too far apart, when going shopping, the salesgirl will say "buying for your son or nephew?" and if you met some friends, they will ask the same question because nobody will believe you have a friend that young. However, if you are out to everyone then no issue. Most of the time, they are not out yet. Whether top or btm, i think not impt. Most impt is both must enjoy each other company. One of my friend recently broken off with his younger half 15 yrs gap because the younger half found another matured guy and decided to break off from him.

I do believe the older guy, at times, will worry if his partner looking for another guy. Recently I do see alot of older ang mo with younger chinese guy! out shopping.

[Guest 不吃西餐]

I do believe the older guy, at times, will worry if his partner looking for another guy. Recently I do see alot of older ang mo with younger chinese guy! out shopping.

In Taiwan, we have a name to call these younger chinese guys - 西餐妹

[Guest surelyugessian]

Ya, it is quite common to have older guy top and young bottom. It seems a trend now that younger guy looking for more mature and older guy as companion. I guessed for stability and understanding. The only problem is, if age gap too far apart, when going shopping, the salesgirl will say "buying for your son or nephew?" and if you met some friends, they will ask the same question because nobody will believe you have a friend that young. However, if you are out to everyone then no issue. Most of the time, they are not out yet. Whether top or btm, i think not impt. Most impt is both must enjoy each other company. One of my friend recently broken off with his younger half 15 yrs gap because the younger half found another matured guy and decided to break off from him.

I do believe the older guy, at times, will worry if his partner looking for another guy. Recently I do see alot of older ang mo with younger chinese guy! out shopping.

most of all my ah peks are bottom (some don't like anal sex at all).

if u know where to look, there's a lot of ah pek going around begging to be serviced from behind.

[easy2read]

my bf is going to be 49yo this year and i am 24 yo soon...

the only difficulty i face in this r/s is that he is not highly driven by sex anymore. we seldom have sex and that's difficult for me cause i am young and have high sex drive. i hv been with him for 4 years++ we've been thru a lot of hardship due to his family, person & financial problems but i am still here standing by him...

[fab]

The only problem is, if age gap too far apart, when going shopping, the salesgirl will say "buying for your son or nephew?"

LOL.

I agree this is one huge problem.

A friend of mine is 40 and only date guys around 20. This is one embarrassing situations he always meets "Buying this (whatever products) for your son?" whenever he goes shopping with his bf.

[Guest Well Said]

I believe a big age difference does not affect the relationship as long as both have the same mentality and objectives. My ex at the age of 45 still wear like 20+ and went parties with friends. I was 33 then. Our priorities in life are so different that I called it off. And 5 years later, he's now 50 and heard that he still partying all the nights. He's like a bee that could stop flying from flower to another flower. I would wish him all the best and no hatred there.

I am now settled down with a homely man and we bought our own house. We're now looking into doing some business together. I also believe that there is always a matching-half our there waiting for us. It is just our Luck if we can meet them to complete as a whole !

Well Said :thumb: :clap:

I'm dating someone 13 years my junior !

Don't ask for much, hope to enjoy every moment when we are together

[Guest Guest]

my bf is going to be 49yo this year and i am 24 yo soon...

the only difficulty i face in this r/s is that he is not highly driven by sex anymore. we seldom have sex and that's difficult for me cause i am young and have high sex drive. i hv been with him for 4 years++ we've been thru a lot of hardship due to his family, person & financial problems but i am still here standing by him...

my friend also had this problem too. But accually the solution is simple. From vers he became a pure btm. He just lay there and watch pxxn while his bf pumped him and cum. He don't need to cum still he enjoyed it a lot. The stimulation help him to improve his cum freqency from twice a month to 4 times a month.

[Guest cliff90]

If I had an older bf, I would worry a lot because since he has a different social life, I am worried that he might be unfaithful and I wouldn't even find out. But why are we talking about age difference???We should believe in fate and the signs teeheex..

[Guest Guest]

People here are just discussing about Age Diff = Unsatisfied Sex? and seems that sex is what everyone is interested about in relationship.

Can the topic be extended to Age Diff = Mentality Diff?

[tyan]

Just my personal opinion, I will prefer someone more mature than me for simple reason

1. stability in term of career, finanicial

2. mentality in term of they know what they are doing.

But having said that, there also cases where a more mature age doesn't mean that they are more mature in their brain department. Some might have career but no sense of saving or planning. And if one is a flirt, he will remains as a flirt regardless of age (more worrying if he is well-to-do). Some mature men are still childish in thinking. Not sure why.

[Guest ym]

But having said that, there also cases where a more mature age doesn't mean that they are more mature in their brain department. Some might have career but no sense of saving or planning. And if one is a flirt, he will remains as a flirt regardless of age (more worrying if he is well-to-do). Some mature men are still childish in thinking. Not sure why.

Very true. Matured age does not mean mentality matured. My ex, an air-steward, at the age of 45 when we were together had to borrow money from me. With he and his circle of colleagues/friends compare, he would buy luxury bags, clothings, shoes, accessories, watches. I told him about saving money for our old age. But, he basically spent what he earned. He is some one who friends come first and therefore, spending his off-day with friends attending party after another party. Some nights he even went "missing in actions" and not contactable by his mobile phone.

Our mentality just cannot synchronized. 4 months down the road, I had enough and decided to leave him to his friends. I guess that is the best happy ending he could have.

[zanfrane]

My lover is 46 while I am 22. The age difference is not a big deal, and we have been together for almost 2.5 years

Also, being in a relationship with someone older has great benefits, including but not limited to:

General stability, especially financial ones

Better "nightly" fun

Having more wisdom and patience (might vary a bit depending on the older person)

Having more opportunities to experience and learn new things (I learnt tons from my lover, and is still learning, including where are some nice restaurants he has been to)

However, he is young at heart, and I sometimes seem more mature than him. I think of him as 'My Man-Child'.

Age difference is not a problem. The only problem in any relationship would be if you are both unable to communicate properly, fail to fall in love, or be unable to understand the very fundamentals that make up the other person.

[sgbloke]

I've read many comments and opinions about age difference in relationships.

I believe its not a matter of yes or no.

It is YOU who want it.

We know jolly well that a mature guy will have his strengths and weaknesses,

likewise for a younger guy.

It is you and your partner to work that out.

Every thing you do have its own risks.

SO live and get over it.

As for me, the age difference of 30years for my partner and I to be in a relationships

can be very challenging and daunting.Nevertheless, we are celebrating our 5th Aniversary soon.

Good Luck, guys!!!

[Guest Alwong]

Love has no dimension for age. I just found my lover & he always claim to love me.But he still flirt around for more sex?? I just can not understand why he behave like that?? I am not sure if I should stop this relationship & allow him to continue his flirting around??

Any commnets

[Man40s]

We crossed our wall of going our own way during our 11th years.

But, we look into our heart and see what we actually wants.

And we back together again.

He is 31 years old and I am now at 45 years.

I guess, it is the communication and who we really wants at the end of the day.

At times, we give space to each another but we know that whatever we do, we have each another heart.

We kissed each another every night and morning.

We spoke about 3some but never try it as the worry was will it affect out relationship after the experience.

Yes, once, when we were out shopping at Calvin Klein, he was trying his suit, the salesman asked him if he would like to seek his "dad" opinion while I was browsing.

Making love was no an issue, it is still strong. Top, Bottom or Flexi, we can adjust to our plays.

Thus, age was never an issue...

[Guest Ironrod]

Wow I am so glad to read abt all the long stable r/s here

Maybe in future we should have some normal gathering then just fxxking and orgies. lol

[Guest No Diff]

How do you guys feel abut the age diff in relationships?

I feel age doesn't matter, as the only diff is the amt of life experience either partner have.

I'm 20 & my partner's 43,we've been in a stable relationship for abt 3 yrs already.

As long as there is mutual love, respect and understanding, there is no barrier to any relationship.

I know of a young 19 yo malay boy (bottom, skinny) going along well with a married chinese 50 yo man (top, chubby).

Age, race, body size, skin colour, etc are not relevant when two parties get along well. Sincere love breaks down all barriers!

[bluesea78]

My partner n I r 22 yrs apart n tog for 35 years .. Wre r veri blessed .. Thank God

if say u get to knw ur bf when he is 16yrs n been with you till now.. with 22yrs apart n 35ys together..u shd be in ur 70s..really nice to knw

[Guest theunwanted]

Is the age gap of a 17 yr old and a 41 yr old too wide ?!

[Guest dark_jedi]

my last guy happened to be 20 years older... he is in 50s now already... no issues at all... as long as both can communicate, nothing should be any issue...

[northernboi]

Hey guys...

I'm just wondering whether in a gay relationship, is it normal for a mature/old men to fall for a younger boys?

or is it common for younger men to target older guys because older guys are already stable (completed ns, finish uni, get a good paying job)?

If age is the matter, how much gap is acceptable for one?

i have a bad episode, the differences in age between my ex was 11 years. Lots of misunderstandings, and in the end. we went our seperate ways.

haiz..

[charlie]

Hey guys...

I'm just wondering whether in a gay relationship, is it normal for a mature/old men to fall for a younger boys?

or is it common for younger men to target older guys because older guys are already stable (completed ns, finish uni, get a good paying job)?

If age is the matter, how much gap is acceptable for one?

i have a bad episode, the differences in age between my ex was 11 years. Lots of misunderstandings, and in the end. we went our seperate ways.

haiz..

for me i feel age does matter leh. >< 5 yrs seems like the max liao.

[derryfawne]

I think that older guys definitely have their own appeals.

Not necessarily just stable financially (although that does add up to the equation), but in terms of emotional stability. Mature-minded people expressing their care can leave a deep burning impression. And they certainly have their own appeal physically too... where the youth is gone, the newly-gained charisma does more than make up for it, the strong facial texture add new depths into the person's character.

But like you suggested, generation gap may be an issue. With different interests and lack of consensus of what constitutes as 'fun', a relationship can be a bit worn off. Wide age gap relationship certainly has its own challenges, but so are narrow age gap ones. Relationship is never really easy, you just have to work them out.

[northernboi]

I think that older guys definitely have their own appeals.

Not necessarily just stable financially (although that does add up to the equation), but in terms of emotional stability. Mature-minded people expressing their care can leave a deep burning impression. And they certainly have their own appeal physically too... where the youth is gone, the newly-gained charisma does more than make up for it, the strong facial texture add new depths into the person's character.

But like you suggested, generation gap may be an issue. With different interests and lack of consensus of what constitutes as 'fun', a relationship can be a bit worn off. Wide age gap relationship certainly has its own challenges, but so are narrow age gap ones. Relationship is never really easy, you just have to work them out.

true.. its not easy... the older ones always kena marked as Phaedophile.. and the young ones are marked as Golddiggers... arghh.. so so so... dont know how to describe ppl..

but again.. its not about ppl we care abt... but nevethless, its the face value bah...

so, yeap.. as u mentioned. its really hard... to make everyone happy is not easy.. but things to make ownself happy is easier..

[northernboi]

for me i feel age does matter leh. >< 5 yrs seems like the max liao.

how come ler? hmmm.. u dun feel comfy with someone younger/older than u more than 5 yrs? any particular thing that triggers it?

[Guest Guest]

I think that older guys definitely have their own appeals.

Not necessarily just stable financially (although that does add up to the equation), but in terms of emotional stability. Mature-minded people expressing their care can leave a deep burning impression. And they certainly have their own appeal physically too... where the youth is gone, the newly-gained charisma does more than make up for it, the strong facial texture add new depths into the person's character.

But like you suggested, generation gap may be an issue. With different interests and lack of consensus of what constitutes as 'fun', a relationship can be a bit worn off. Wide age gap relationship certainly has its own challenges, but so are narrow age gap ones. Relationship is never really easy, you just have to work them out.

i'd prefer older guys for the greater stability ... less likely to say "i'm too young to settle down"

[derryfawne]

true.. its not easy... the older ones always kena marked as Phaedophile.. and the young ones are marked as Golddiggers... arghh.. so so so... dont know how to describe ppl..

but again.. its not about ppl we care abt... but nevethless, its the face value bah...

so, yeap.. as u mentioned. its really hard... to make everyone happy is not easy.. but things to make ownself happy is easier..

Ugh, I hate that. People are super judgmental lo. >.<

So the 'misunderstanding' that you meant is what other people think about the two of you, rather than misunderstanding between the two of you?

[northernboi]

Ugh, I hate that. People are super judgmental lo. >.<

So the 'misunderstanding' that you meant is what other people think about the two of you, rather than misunderstanding between the two of you?

yeah... this gives pressures to both of us.. both his peers and mine.. so yeah...

so sad sia..

[abang]

Age does matter.

I'm 50 and if I go for someone that is 15 years younger, there is a significant gap

between our physical, mental. psychological and financial ability.

I cannot be jogging 10 km with him (sigh for my weak knees)

I cannot be dancing all night.. and he will go "grab somebody and drink a little more.. on the floor" while I just sit there like a wallflower

..1

I want to go on holidays every 2 to 3 months but he does not have enough annual leave or money set aside for it ...

So where is my man.... 45 to 55 ...please pm me :whistle:

[Guest Guest]

Must not confuse lust with love as well.

Some older guys find younger guys much more sexually appealing and attractive & vice versa.

[Guest gongsimilanjiao]

this is blood obvious. if i'm 20 why would i go out with someone who can be my father?

if i'm 45 and managed to snag a 25yo, then it wont last cos the latter wants to club and bang whole night but the older sure cannot

singaporean guys still very one kind one lah

[Guest Rivrics]

It does not matter. My first ex is only a year older but someone who likes to play. My second and current 7 years running is 36 years older, and we click so well together. We think so much alike that sometimes it scares us.... It really depends on the values each carry and whether it matches...

[Seeker]

To the individuals in the relationship it never seems to matter, otherwise they wouldn't have a relationship to begin with. But society also has a view point on it. I seriously doubt many 35+ guys are going to bring their 16+ year old boyfriends home to meet mother because they know exactly what mothers gonna say. Even in the heterosexual community an older guy with a much younger woman is still pointed at. And I'm many people reading this are guilty of doing just that. "oh my God, is that his boyfriend? Such a cradle snatcher!"

[Guest Ironrod]

TS, I think age does not matter but sex matters.

You must first understand why this person wants to be with you, and why u want to be with him.

A few exercise you can try with older guys [since now u are the younger one]

1) Don't have sex for first 3 months - you will know if the person wants u or your body?

2) Go cheaper places so he doesn't feel u are a gold digger

3) You can try telling him some of your problems and thoughts [not whining pls] - to see if he is remotely interested or being dominating

I am 38 - I still play my Kinect, PS3, PC games, NDS and sometimes PSP so age doesn't really matter.

It's the person character and yours if it's made for each other - but like I say don't let sex cloud your judgement.

[Guest yoyo]

Im going to 27 this year. and my partner is going to 57

we are about 3 years now, and dont have any ages issue. only sometime got a litle problem...

cos he is too temperimental, but good communications and understanding always be a big help.

[mamemo]

Don't stereotype young guys ok...

i am 22 i dont dance all night.

i dont drink dont club.

i like to enjoy coffee in a nice place and relax.

i cant run 10km too.

barely passed 2.4 in ns.

i guess i am mentally 50?

[darkflame]

I met a guy who was 15 years older than me once. We did click a lot, had a lot of topics to talk about.

He thought I was 30 plus before meeting me.

So I think age doesn't matter. You need to see if you can click with him.

[thorzguy]

In my opinion, age doesn't really matters.

What really matters: the character and mentatlity of a person.

[easy2read]

my bf is 50yo this year and i am half his age...

we've been together for 5 years and now he's like a father who takes care of me...

Edited June 2, 2011 by easy2read

[Mercutio]

For some age matters, for others it doesn't. No rules. But I'd caveat myself with the following:

a) relationships aren't just about sex - that will fade after a while even if the two of you were the most gorgeous things in the world - what makes it last after that is the ability to grow together;

b) age gaps themselves don't matter but most of the time they indicate other gaps - imbalance of power (financial, usually) or different life stages... By the latter, I mean for example, one has had enough fun and wants to nest at home, while the other hasn't had enough circuit parties yet.

[northernboi]

Don't stereotype young guys ok...

i am 22 i dont dance all night.

i dont drink dont club.

i like to enjoy coffee in a nice place and relax.

i cant run 10km too.

barely passed 2.4 in ns.

i guess i am mentally 50?

wow! mentally also can meh? hmmmmmm

[sfguy123]

hello everyone, My relationship with my partner started when i was 24 and he was 55..i've always had a thing for older men anyways we started off as FBs but 2months into it he told me that he wanted to be with me full time, i had so many family issues it was easy for me to start seeing him getting to know him better and in the 1st year i moved into his house and i never left since..5 yrs now i'm 29 going to be 30 in sept. and he is 60 we do fight and disagee but are love for each other always shines, i know it may sound corny but relationships with older men take time

Edited June 3, 2011 by sfguy123

[Avecinfuser]

In my first real relationship, my ex was 10 years older than me. We cyberdated for 1 year and then were physically together for 4 years. In the end he cheated on me and in retaliation I cheated back on him. We had a very rough break up. Age doesn't really matter. What matters is whether the two persons are right for each other. If some things are not meant to be, it's not. Go figure it for yourself

[MomentoMori]

The notion of age not being a factor in a relationship is an idealistic one. I applaud those who have maintained such a relationship but at the same time, it should be pointed out that such cases are more the exception than the norm. It's not impossible but it's implausible.

Much of the debate in here centres around stereotypes. While I do not subscribe to stereotypes (the difference caused by age in maturity, physical attributes and desires), I do see the value in them. Stereotypes are generalisations, I don't deny that, but they also have a fair bit of truth in them.

Stereotype #1 - Younger guys are more physically-inclined.

Do I really need to go into this? We can argue this all the way till the PAP is toppled but can you deny the obvious? Why do you think, inter alia, NS starts at 18? Or that the majority of the athletes or sportsmen (in physical sports) are below 30? Or that on a random run around a park, stadium, reservoir, you're more likely to see younger guys?

If I were to add a caveat, it would be younger guys are more likely to be physically inclined.

Stereotype #2 - Maturity determined by age.

Now, this is worth a discourse or two. Personally, I feel that age should not be an indicator of maturity or vice versa. However, more often than not, there is a strong relationship between them. Maturity is often measured in terms of awareness and experience. These aspects are temporal (ever heard of phrases like "wise beyond one's years"?) and thus, it is rational to say that age is indicative of maturity. Yet, at the same time, age is not definitive of maturity either.

Essentially I'm trying to say that if your reason in choosing an older/younger partner is due to a preference for maturity (or lack thereof), you should not overlook the crowd that doesn't fit into your age criterion.

Now moving on to elaborate why I feel age is a factor in a relationship. Clichè as it may be, the key to any relationship is communication. If the both of you possess shared ideals and beliefs, hooray! What if you don't? How do you communicate? In a rapidly growing society like Singapore, a difference of 5 years means a whole world of difference - you didn't watch the same shows when you were young, your preferences in music might be different etc. If you draw on the very-convenient-for-guys conversation resource of NS, what you're more likely to hear is: "In my time..." or a conversation that might be drawn into a subtle (or not so subtle) exercise of one-upmanship.

This is just my penny's worth of thoughts. I know there are other factors like culture, language etc. but to delve into them is a tedious affair. My bottomline is this: Age, whether you like it or not, does matter.

[Guest blessed]

Hey guys...

I'm just wondering whether in a gay relationship, is it normal for a mature/old men to fall for a younger boys?

or is it common for younger men to target older guys because older guys are already stable (completed ns, finish uni, get a good paying job)?

If age is the matter, how much gap is acceptable for one?

i have a bad episode, the differences in age between my ex was 11 years. Lots of misunderstandings, and in the end. we went our seperate ways.

haiz..

Thank God, I was very blessed to meet my boyfriend (who is 21 years older than me, I'm 19 this year while he is 40) through BW forum. 2 months ago, I felt very depressed and attempted my 1st entry in BW forum. In summary, our relationship accelerated miraculously in 2 months, and I'm already staying with him now. I know that he is my one and only soulmate. Therefore, I personally feel that age does not matter in a relationship.

[Guest Wise Man]

Aiyo... anyone with age gap not more than 100yo is ok lah :thumb:

[No Frills Factory Outlet]

age does matter lol