Singapore Gay Bars / Pub / Clubbing Places To Recommend? + Where To Club & Chillout? (Compiled)

[imchaser]

Thats it! I cant stand it anymore.

On certain occassions after work, sometimes i really feel the urge to really wanna go for a drink at those gay bar in Chinatown or Tanjon Pgr. But eveytime i reach there, i chicken out bcoz i just too shy and embarrassed and thin face to go in and sit alone! I just feel awkward when the first step i step in, everyone will be looking at me.

Any tips on the above mentioned problem? Any dos and donts if im going alone? If everyone else is in a group, what should i do or where should i sit or stand? Should i pretend to play with the phone? but thats too lame. I cant pretend to read too bcos its too dark either. Before this at least i can smoke at least theres something i can do. Btw, im not those who will make the first move and approach a stranger kinda person.

If u r in the bar with your friends, whats your impression on us who go alone? is it desparation, or a loner? or a money boy? or u dont really care?

[rado980d]

Totally understand how you feel... Cos we are in the same boat.

Can anyone offer some words of wisdom here?

[tennis_uncle]

Totally understand how you feel... Cos we are in the same boat.

Can anyone offer some words of wisdom here?

Since u 2 r in the same boat, then its simple. U 2 hook up and go together, then u can keep each other company.

[imchaser]

Since u 2 r in the same boat, then its simple. U 2 hook up and go together, then u can keep each other company.

I knew reply like this would come! Well, if this is the case, then the topic would have read "Looking for friends to go gay bar with" instead of what it is now, wouldn't it?

[rado980d]

I knew reply like this would come! Well, if this is the case, then the topic would have read "Looking for friends to go gay bar with" instead of what it is now, wouldn't it?

Good rebuke Imchaser!

[imchaser]

Im sorry Tennis Uncle, doesnt mean to be a rude brat. Any suggestion on the above topic would be welcome.

[Guest guest]

if go alone, prefer to sit at bar counter and chat with bartender, or just drink your beer/wine or liquor.

you can also sit at bar stool, near the door or bar counter. chat up with people and get to know them.

[Guest tttt]

Sadly, I only dare to do this when I'm overseas. Too shy to do it here..... but strangly, I still dare to go to straight bars alone here.

[Guest Retiree]

I am not really afraid of stranger, I am afraid to meet someone familar like relatives, colleagues, clients, classmates. I prefer to go lounge where the space is much bigger and you get to have your own privacy and there are music to just listen to without doing anything except with your eyes.

In fact the advantage of going alone so that you can get hooked or hook up someone and just go without fearing whether your friends will be left alone. Alone create opportunity, if in group people will not dare to come near you.

When you are lone, work with your eyes and not with your voices. There is nothing to lose and if the place proved uneventful after spending a night there, pick elsewhere and than elsewhere until you find the right bar that cater to your comfort level.

[Guest kai]

I personally feel very intimated going to a gay club/bar alone. I had done so before and I felt very lonely in some ways. I think if one were to be in a foreign country, going to a gay club/bar alone could be less intimating as you are a visitor to that country. Hence, psychologically, it is less intimating as you are foreign to that environment and it is expected of you to be alone, whereas locally, it would look as if "I am left on the shelf" feeling....

[GachiMuchi]

I remember many donkey years ago, my friend told me that there was a gay karaoke bar in Tanjong Pagar Road called Inner Circle. I was curious and had decided to go and take a look.

I decided to ask my friend along, but sad to say, I could not find anyone of my small pool of gay friends (at that time) to join me as they are not the pub going kind.

On that faithful day, after work, I walked in Inner Circle at about 8+. Before stepping in, I did loiter outside for about 20 mins. Thoughts about chickening out did cross my mind. But then when I think further; I am entering an established entertainment spot for a drink and some singing and are not doing anything criminal. It so happens that the place is gay owned, other than that, it is no different from other entertainment spot.

The friendly service, some beers and singing, certainly help to relax.

After that day, I goes to Inner Circle as often as I can and it soon became a regular place for me hang out and chill.

I made many new friends and many happy times, especially during the celebration of IC's Anniversaries, Holidays & New Years.

Cheers and hope your experience in an establishment is pleasant one.

[dienasaw]

baby steps... start by just going for a drink. it can't be that hard to order a drink, paying for it, drinking it and leaving after a while.

then go again. each time, observe something different and learn something new...

as you progress, start to chat up the person taking your drink order... smile at someone who may be alone too. say a simple 'hi. how are you?'

it gets easier after that... if it doesn't, either that place is not suitable for you or vice versa... then get a 6pack and drink alone at home... ")

[Guest :-)]

Funny, this reminds me of my business trip to Vienna few years back.

I was determined to visit a gay bar one evening so I did my homework in the hotel room using google search for gay bars where mature uncles hang out. Remember it was damm cold as it was just before Christmas, I took a train to the area with a map in my hand, finally found the place. It doesn't seem to have much activity inside but I just couldn't find any courage to walk into it.... I was walking to and fro outside for about half an hour and decided to go back to the hotel. I know... it's such a shame!!! :-(

[Guest Shy]

I loitered half and hour outside New Shogun many times and todate, I have still not the courage to step inside. My situation is the same here.

[tennis_uncle]

Im sorry Tennis Uncle, doesnt mean to be a rude brat. Any suggestion on the above topic would be welcome.

No worries imchaser. My reading of yr post was that while u want inputs on how to go to a gay bar alone, you also elaborated much on yr own discomforts and issues in going alone. So the natural and simple answer (to me anyway) was to find some company. Failing which, you then need to decide for yrself whether to overcome/put up with yr own discomforts or give up going alone altogether.

You may want to clarify for yrself what yr real objective(s) is/are for going to a bar. Just to have a drink n chill out? Just to find company to past the time with? To hook up with someone? etc. Clarity of yr objectives may make it easier for folks here to offer suggestions. Do you want creative pick up lines? How to screw up courage to just walk in? How to make entertaining conversation? How to pretty yrself up to attract attention?

You also seem to care much about what others may be thinking of u, being alone, etc. We'll, i'll just quote Richard P. Feynman:

“What Do You Care What Other People Think?” You are doing it for yrself (like yr 'sisters/brothers' are doing it for themselves everywhere...[sic!]). You don't have to care what other people think.

[tennis_uncle]

... It doesn't seem to have much activity inside but I just couldn't find any courage to walk into it.... I was walking to and fro outside for about half an hour and decided to go back to the hotel. I know... it's such a shame!!! :-(

I loitered half and hour outside New Shogun many times and todate, I have still not the courage to step inside. My situation is the same here.

Going into a bar, going to a sauna, going to a PLU movie, buying a Gay magazine from a newsagent... Such simple, innocent? activities but such a horror for the first timer. I remember pacing the streets outside a newsagent in the UK for nearly an hour, before finally screwing up the courage (or foolhardiness) to walk in, pick up the offending mag, paying for it sheepishly, stuffing it quickly into a bag, all along avoiding the gaze of the newsagent or anyone, and then beating a hasty retreat.

In those days, there was no internet, no forums, no email lists, no irc, no fridaes/trevvies, etc. When u are alone... u r really alone. Later, when i did get round to going to my first bar, sauna, it was so much easier bcos a friend brought me to those. And once u've crossed that initial barrier, and u still wanna go again, u shud be fine even when going alone. Nowadays, u have all the online resources to make friends/contacts easily. So make use of them and make it easier for yrselves.

Here's some quick googles which shud be helpful:

http://gaylife.about.com/c/ht/02/08/How_Go...b1029531490.htm

http://media.www.studlife.com/media/storag...e-3206198.shtml

Not all the advise may be applicable to our local context as the bar culture here is different, but the're somethings there to think about.

Edited July 15, 2008 by tennis_uncle

[imchaser]

I understand how all of u feel. When u decided to go, u have all the courage inside u like fire, but when u chicken out and turn back in front of the door, u felt so useless and shameful on yourself. I dont understand why is it so hard? But luckily so far i dont have any problem going to the sauna.

I think the next time ill be fully boosted up and prepared and wont chicken out again, finger crossed. Im fed up feeling so useless already. In fact, i think i will be going tonight! Wish me luck.

So the natural and simple answer (to me anyway) was to find some company. You may want to clarify for yrself what yr real objective(s) is/are for going to a bar.

Everytime i went with my friends or friend, i wished that they will dissapear and wish i am alone. because u will always found someone making eye contact or smile to u, but u cant do anything. haha. but if im going alone to the bar, how i wish they were with me. i dunno. i guess i would prefer going alone when i m hoping to hook up with someone.

You also seem to care much about what others may be thinking of u, being alone, etc.

I dunno why i care so much, i think i because i have a thin skin. And because im not that old, im worried other ppl might think im those call boy waithing for customer or something.

Alright, maybe i think too much.

[rado980d]

I dunno why i care so much, i think i because i have a thin skin. And because im not that old, im worried other ppl might think im those call boy waithing for customer or something.

Alright, maybe i think too much.

[GachiMuchi]

Here are a few tips which I learned during my days in the pub.

When you see someone you like at the pub, even though he is with friends, you can try these tips.

1. Keep looking at him and hope he notice you. If he sees you, just smile and nod your head. Alternatively, you can raise your glass to make a toast looking at him.

2. If he goes to the toilet, give him a few minutes. Heads towards the toilet so that you can bum into him when he comes out. Smile and if possible make small talk, e.g., you sing well just now, etc.

3. If he sings well, give up your chance to sing by requesting that you would like him to sing the song on ur behalf.

NEVER. Openly touch anyone, no matter how much you like him even though you are in a pub / KTV.

Most importantly, make sure you smile and look Approachable.

Don't go there with a face like as if people owe you money.

Hope you have fun.

[imchaser]

Maybe we should really make an effort to go together... If this happen we really have Tennis Uncle to thank! :thumb:

Yeah, maybe we should, say next week? haha. u have any place in mind?

[Guest Shy]

Don't know why going to the bar is tougher than going to the suana where you need to be fully naked. Gay club here also require you to be stripped naked or wrapped with only tower which is the greatest detterent to walk in. What if you bumped into your colleagues and they saw your dangling dick or your happened to look straight into your client's cock by accident. So many things can happen.

[tennis_uncle]

Everytime i went with my friends or friend, i wished that they will dissapear and wish i am alone. because u will always found someone making eye contact or smile to u, but u cant do anything. haha. but if im going alone to the bar, how i wish they were with me. i dunno. i guess i would prefer going alone when i m hoping to hook up with someone.

Talk about it with yr friend/companion first and work out a clear understanding and mode of operation. That you may go in together but both are perfectly ok that the other may be 'hooked' and that you may be left alone or even leave alone. Be prepared and accept the possible outcomes and u shud be much more at ease. Also, sometimes its easier to have the courage to approach someone on behalf of yr friend/companion, so u can help each other out... but take care u 2 dun end up competing for the same person.

I dunno why i care so much, i think i because i have a thin skin. And because im not that old, im worried other ppl might think im those call boy waithing for customer or something.

Thin skins can be thickened, and that may come about from experience. If you never even try, you will never experience or learn. Its not helpful to project yr own 'thoughts' on how others think. More likely they are just normal, ordinary "people like us".

[Guest ttttt]

Such simple, innocent? activities but such a horror for the first timer. I remember pacing the streets outside a newsagent in the UK for nearly an hour, before finally screwing up the courage (or foolhardiness) to walk in, pick up the offending mag, paying for it sheepishly, stuffing it quickly into a bag, all along avoiding the gaze of the newsagent or anyone, and then beating a hasty retreat.

Been there, done that. I even bought a Hussler (straight pxxn) magazine, thinking that it will confuse the fellow somehow, to mask myself. I gave it to a straight friend later...

[Guest Guest]

organize a BWer gathering at one fo the gay bar lor

[tom88s]

never try all this gayBar, can someone tell me which is the most sleazy one ? will love to make a try. tk u

[GachiMuchi]

None of the bars in Sg are sleazy. It's left to the customers to play up the sleaze.

[Guest Alone and horny]

Hi. Im horny tonight and need to get laid. Dont feel like going to the sauna.

Im goodlooking 27 years old chinese. Am thinking of going to Backstage or Tantric to get hooked up with mature executives. I will be a bit shy to do this, going to the bar alone with the intention to get hooked up. Which pub is good for loner wanted to get hooked up? Anyone going there alone too to hooked up with people?

[Guest guest]

Going to a gay bar alone ... ?

Think of all the strange looks u get...

It's ok .... just be natural and walk in :clap: :clap:

NO BIG DEAL

[ixmog]

Gay pub, gay bar and gay disco are my passé .

Get laid in the first visit is still possible but seems not the trend here.

Maybe have to meet the person a few rounds in the pub.

Whisper some dirty talks. Makes some horny gesture and body language.

Then get laid. Time consuming.

Sauna is like do already then goodbye.

Clean cut.

Bars, pubs and disco you may find many different type of people.

Act class executive. Macho mary. Lamp posts. Super model.

Play hard to get type people. But first you still need some time to know them before they bring you home for a lovely fxxk session.

Edited January 2, 2009 by ixmog

[Guest guest]

A long time ago there was a bar in Lucky Plaza called Vincents. One day I was very bored and went there alone. Ordered a drink and haven't even had a sip when an ang mo kept tilting his head to me. I finally left with him without even finishing half my drink. He drove me to his house and needless to say what happened there. I was still very young then..

[Sticky&Sweet]

OK I don't know if this helps. It certainly made it easier for me when I first came out and wanted to visit a gay bar.

I basically told myself - "fxxk it! You only live once, might as well enjoy yourself even though you're going into a bar club alone."

And so I did. Went in, ordered a drink, bopped along to the music (or watched the MTV on the LCD screen), danced along... sooner or later someone would come up to say Hi.

When I was in London, I went to this bar called Kudos alone. I really enjoyed myself there even though I was alone. I mean, people do come up to you to chat, so just make small talk. You might get to know titbits about the different lives people lead. I wasn't into caucasians, so there wasn't any "let's go back to fxxk" kind of thing. But it was fun nonetheless.

[chubaholic]

Too bad SG dont have the small, cosy-type bars like they do in Japan. It is so intimate and easier to cruise. The bar counter is where everyone sits, and if you are lucky you get to sit beside a gorgeous one. After a few round of drinks, and singing, and chatting, putting your hand on his lap or crotch (if you are hard-up enough) below the counter and away from prying eyes is all it takes.

BTW, Japanese also find it difficult and scared to go to the bar alone, and open the door, especially a new bar, which they are not familiar with.

Edited January 2, 2009 by chubaholic

[cadlad]

i was in hk for a short trip alone and decided to check out a gay pub described by guide books as small, cosy and friendly. when i opened the door to enter, the entire pub stared at me. and all i wanted was to have a drink and quietly observe the crowd from a discreet corner! the scrutiny made me so nervous i used the loo and then fled.

Edited January 3, 2009 by cadlad

[Guest lo]

There is a little gay bar operated by a Singaporean couple in HK Central which has a separate entrance and another for exit in the basement of a building. A number of HK celebrities go there as it is not easy to spot who enters or leaves the bar. Will check it and share the info.

[SKMan]

Thats it! I cant stand it anymore.

On certain occassions after work, sometimes i really feel the urge to really wanna go for a drink at those gay bar in Chinatown or Tanjon Pgr. But eveytime i reach there, i chicken out bcoz i just too shy and embarrassed and thin face to go in and sit alone! I just feel awkward when the first step i step in, everyone will be looking at me.

Any tips on the above mentioned problem? Any dos and donts if im going alone? If everyone else is in a group, what should i do or where should i sit or stand? Should i pretend to play with the phone? but thats too lame. I cant pretend to read too bcos its too dark either. Before this at least i can smoke at least theres something i can do. Btw, im not those who will make the first move and approach a stranger kinda person.

If u r in the bar with your friends, whats your impression on us who go alone? is it desparation, or a loner? or a money boy? or u dont really care?

For me, when I drink alone, I go to a straight bar ha ha....

[Guest Grammar Police]

On that faithful day, after work, I walked in Inner Circle at about 8+. Before stepping in, I did loiter outside for about 20 mins. Thoughts about chickening out did cross my mind. But then when I think further; I am entering an established entertainment spot for a drink and some singing and are not doing anything criminal. It so happens that the place is gay owned, other than that, it is no different from other entertainment spot.

Gosh Gachi Muchi, you indeed took a 'leap of faith' to enter into a gay bar. It should be 'fateful' not 'faithful'.

[imchaser]

So in Singapore, which gay pub is the best if u r planning to go alone, for hooking up with strangers?

[GachiMuchi]

Gosh Gachi Muchi, you indeed took a 'leap of faith' to enter into a gay bar. It should be 'fateful' not 'faithful'.

Thanks for pointing out my mistakes.

[Guest Grammar Police]

Thanks for pointing out my mistakes.

There is only ONE mistake, so you might have overstated there. Thanks

[GachiMuchi]

So in Singapore, which gay pub is the best if u r planning to go alone, for hooking up with strangers?

It would depend. I was told that it is quiet easy to pick up strangers in Tantric and Backstage, but most who patronise the pubs are mostly GWM or those SPG who likes GWM.

As for pub like PLUs and Same. I think it would be rather difficult as most of those who goes there are mostly in groups of 2 or more. In KTV pubs, it would be harder to hookup. But you never try you don't know right?

[GachiMuchi]

There is only ONE mistake, so you might have overstated there. Thanks

Don't worry, there are more to cum.

[love_seek]

But really, i stepped into same last week and was kinda scared shitless... LOL and i was with my friends...

It would depend. I was told that it is quiet easy to pick up strangers in Tantric and Backstage, but most who patronise the pubs are mostly GWM or those SPG who likes GWM.

As for pub like PLUs and Same. I think it would be rather difficult as most of those who goes there are mostly in groups of 2 or more. In KTV pubs, it would be harder to hookup. But you never try you don't know right?

[GachiMuchi]

Scared shitless? By who? What are you afraid of?

[love_seek]

I got no idea man... its kinda scary? hahahaha Just kinda scary? I am not the person who goes to open pubs? LOL

Scared shitless? By who? What are you afraid of?

[bearinhugger]

One can go to SAME after buying some new year goodies in Chinatown for a glass of beer or two, sing a few songs then head back home.

Treat it as a form of relaxation.

Very convenient.

[imchaser]

Hi, any new gay bars in town other than Tantric or Backstage thats great for hanging out when u r alone?

[cadlad]

besides tantric and backstage.

DYMK (which stands for Does Your Mother Know) is cosy and their drinks are reasonably potent and undiluted, at least for the two times i was there. nice joint to chill at but maybe not when the place gets filled up because the crowd tends to be in groups and very cliquish.

ironically i find that i'm actually ok drinking alone when it's extremely crowded in taboo or play. i'm talking about the peak hours where the place is filled to the brim and you can't even move. lots of eye candy to ogle at too.

[castaway]

I stop going alone to Gay bar/club in Singapore one year ago

It is so boring, people just look at you ... do nothing ...

If I try to talk first then they think I want to sleep with him :yuk:

If I don't talk, just look then may be they think I am arrogant

so funny, better to stay at home and putting comments in this forum with a glass of wine :whistle:

it feels much better

[GachiMuchi]

Here are some links to Local PLU establishments in Singapore.

http://www.blowingwind.org/forum/index.php?showtopic=71 BW's very own local link

http://www.fridae.com/cityguides2/guide.php?p=4 - Fridae's City Guide

http://www.utopia-asia.com/tipssing.htm - Utopia Asia Singapore Listing

[maturemedium]

I go to +PLUS alone. In fact just came back and ready for bed. Come and talk to me if you go alone there. Dun be shy.