Cheating Boyfriend / Lover + Why Cheat when In a Relationship? (Compiled)

[Steve5380]

6 hours ago, fab said:

Of course sex is only part of relationship. But if u truly love another person, it is strange that there's no jealousy if u were to know he's having sex  with someone else. Love is possessive.

 

On the other hand, if i truly love another person, the last thing I want to do to hurt him by having sex with another person.

 

 

Sex can be part of a relationship, but it is not essential.  Many old folks have lovely relationships without sex.

Love should be reciprocal, but it is not clear that it has to be possessive.

If we truly love our partner, why would we hurt him by trying to restrict the source of happiness he can have by enjoying some sex with others?   Our lives are intrinsically miserable, and any bit of enjoyment is a blessing.

On the other hand, it is an act of love to counsel our partner if he falls into hurtful promiscuity, which is not necessarily the case in people who are polygamous.

 

[Guest Blank]

Because they're animals

[Steve5380]

4 minutes ago, Guest Blank said:

Because they're animals

 

Because WE HUMANS are animals.

[Steve5380]

On 5/15/2017 at 11:33 AM, OnePiece said:

Being in a 15 years relationship has thought me this: we are both human, so there are times when we needed to know if we are still "hot" in the market.

 

 

God bless your 15 year relationship, and keep your eyes open to appreciate it every single day.  Because we don't know the future.

My 21 year relationship just ended by my bf passing away, and this has changed the whole world for me.

With love for your bf, let him wish that he passes away first and is saved that suffering.  My bf got this wish fulfilled.

[LeanMature]

8 hours ago, qsefthu78 said:

And if you grow old, and no longer be able to have sex as much or not at all, your relationship crumbles? 

 

If both of you have sex until age of 70, there is nothing much left to be crumble.  Remember - nothing is permanent in this world.

[LeanMature]

1 hour ago, Steve5380 said:

 

An original analogy of a relationship.  But isn't it kind of arbitrary?  Why are there two pillars and not three, or six, or twelve?

Three pillars is usually the minimum to support any structure.  But why pillars?  Cannot a relationship have a slab as foundation?

The emotional seems to be the single essential component of a relationship.  Love is emotion.

Many relationships successfully exist without any sex.

 

 

If you have a relationship that can last without sex till death do we part, then one pillar for you still stand.

[Guest Puneet]

I’m 80 years old now and my partner and I have stopped having sex (fucking) more than a decade ago. And yet we are still together. Now what can you say about our sexless relationship?

[Guest Turingfan]

On 5/13/2017 at 10:38 AM, iamziz said:

Terribly failed maths still don't know how to count 1+1=2 not 1+1=3 or many

 

OMG help us, how do so many str8s pass maths?

[Guest disclosed yourself]

On 8/24/2018 at 6:56 PM, Guest Relationship said:

In my opinion, if you truly love that person wouldn’t that feeling make u kind of possessive ? I can’t imagine that person I love having sex with others guy during our relationship? Is this wrong ? 

 

Yeah right!

 

Guys! Don't fall into a trap. It's that split personality Guest Guest, Guest Guest 2, Guest 脏子姨 etc who is hijacking my profile name and just trying to paint me in an ugly manner or trying to ridicule me.

 

He's upset because I pointing out his nastiness at every corner.

 

His post here is just nonsense.

 

He's just trying to provoke me...

But I won't be... because it's silly.

 

Just ignore his blabbering .  he is just repeatedly embarrassing himself hence and forth...

 

Probably he is just developing some red dots on his dick.....
 

 

 

 

 

Poroaki tutata, whakahoro ki tau kee!

[transmissionsm]

Was at a staycation with my wife. She got into those mood swings We didn't talk for the 1+ days remaining of our staycation. I went out on my own and she went out on her own.

 

I download grindr and found a malaysian staying in the same hotel. When to his suite to give him a blow.

 

Now it's all good with my wife so will not be "eating-out" till she pisses me off again.

 

 

[Guest @.@]

On 8/24/2018 at 2:30 PM, fab said:

Of course sex is only part of relationship. But if u truly love another person, it is strange that there's no jealousy if u were to know he's having sex  with someone else. Love is possessive.

 

On the other hand, if i truly love another person, the last thing I want to do to hurt him by having sex with another person.

 

 

Love is not possessive, people are possessive. and an overly possessive person is perhaps using ‘love’ as a cover for his insecurities or hang-ups.

If you truly love another person, you would want him to feel as happy, fulfilled and desired as possible. If you cannot personally deliver that, to deny him another outlet is selfishness, not love.

[Steve5380]

31 minutes ago, Guest @.@ said:

 

Love is not possessive, people are possessive. and an overly possessive person is perhaps using ‘love’ as a cover for his insecurities or hang-ups.

If you truly love another person, you would want him to feel as happy, fulfilled and desired as possible. If you cannot personally deliver that, to deny him another outlet is selfishness, not love.

 

I second your post.

 

 

[manifest]

being gay is all about lust! Chill

[auscent]

I dont undeestand: a fuck buddy in open relationship insists good sex and good company (chat, cuddle, pillow talk) fr my fren.

What is the fuck buddy guy missing out in his relationship?

[lovehandle]

All your questions get answered here 

 

[West93]

On 1/27/2019 at 8:01 AM, Guest @.@ said:

 

Love is not possessive, people are possessive. and an overly possessive person is perhaps using ‘love’ as a cover for his insecurities or hang-ups.

If you truly love another person, you would want him to feel as happy, fulfilled and desired as possible. If you cannot personally deliver that, to deny him another outlet is selfishness, not love.

I hope you never have that blow back in your face when you realised that giving your partner another outlet to get satisfied more by someone else in the end only drove them out of your arms into theirs. 

 

Generally speaking in today's world humans are not known for loyalty much anymore. Sharing your partner willingly with others out of some basis of letting strangers fill a void or gap that you can't satisfy your partner doesn't earn you gratitude, it only earns you contempt. If you want to swing or have an open relationship the only way its equitable for both parties is if both parties participate together. Anything else is just enabled cheating. 

 

Edited January 28, 2019 by West93

[Guest guest]

Welcome to e gay circle! 

[Guest Blank]

A handsome guy looking at you is very hard to resist. I'm attached but this guy standing in front of me is simply my type. Dark, same height, muscular fit, short hair, nice face, and I couldn't resist to touch his arm first. Then I grab his waist and slowly went towards the groin area. He didn't stop me and hold onto his penis and balls. To my surprise, it didn't feel the same as my bf's privates. That was as how as it goes as I was afraid, there might be others watching us. 

 

I felt bad when I saw my bf after that, not knowing what happened earlier. But I didn't have sex with the guy so maybe not a grave mistake. 

[fab]

17 minutes ago, Guest Blank said:

A handsome guy looking at you is very hard to resist. I'm attached but this guy standing in front of me is simply my type. Dark, same height, muscular fit, short hair, nice face, and I couldn't resist to touch his arm first. Then I grab his waist and slowly went towards the groin area. He didn't stop me and hold onto his penis and balls. To my surprise, it didn't feel the same as my bf's privates. That was as how as it goes as I was afraid, there might be others watching us. 

 

I felt bad when I saw my bf after that, not knowing what happened earlier. But I didn't have sex with the guy so maybe not a grave mistake. 

 

 

Karma is watching.

[Garyl]

Just stay out of scene if can.. we retire into a secluded spot in SG ..

 

[Steve5380]

5 hours ago, fab said:

 

Karma is watching.

 

Karma should be free of prejudices.

[fab]

6 minutes ago, Steve5380 said:

 

Karma should be free of prejudices.

 

Yes it is.

 

It is only a system. If one hurts another this life, he will be hurt back. Totally no prejudice involved. Just simple cause and effect.

[Steve5380]

On 1/27/2019 at 11:35 PM, West93 said:

I hope you never have that blow back in your face when you realised that giving your partner another outlet to get satisfied more by someone else in the end only drove them out of your arms into theirs. 

 

Generally speaking in today's world humans are not known for loyalty much anymore. Sharing your partner willingly with others out of some basis of letting strangers fill a void or gap that you can't satisfy your partner doesn't earn you gratitude, it only earns you contempt. If you want to swing or have an open relationship the only way its equitable for both parties is if both parties participate together. Anything else is just enabled cheating. 

 

 

I would agree with you, if it were not for plenty of experience and knowing many couples who have stuck together for decades in open relationships.

I know two gays who have been in a relationship for over 30 years. They have quarreled, they have disagreements, but they live the one for the other.  The younger one finds gays with big cocks for his partner who is a bottom, since he is small and does not satisfy him.  Neither of them would separate from the other because of some cocks more or less, bigger or smaller.

 

[lonelyglobe]

Aiyo simple leh, gay btm like to get fucked and gay top like to fuck, dont need to argue so much or make excuses...

[Guest Guest123]

Monogamous is only for people who had never had long long term relationships.. Lolz.. 

Its not even a debatable topic to start with.. 

Pointless...

You fuck outside, u go home.. Nobody knows.. you r satisfied and happy. You go back to cooking or doing the laundry for your partner. Dinner chat resumes... 

Its just sex, it's not like you will get pregnant or something....

[fab]

25 minutes ago, Guest Guest123 said:

Monogamous is only for people who had never had long long term relationships.. Lolz.. 

Its not even a debatable topic to start with.. 

Pointless...

You fuck outside, u go home.. Nobody knows.. you r satisfied and happy. You go back to cooking or doing the laundry for your partner. Dinner chat resumes... 

Its just sex, it's not like you will get pregnant or something....

 

Karma knows. 

 

Not to mention std etc. And conscience. If u ve one.

[Garyl]

32 minutes ago, Guest Guest123 said:

Monogamous is only for people who had never had long long term relationships.. Lolz.. 

Its not even a debatable topic to start with.. 

Pointless...

You fuck outside, u go home.. Nobody knows.. you r satisfied and happy. You go back to cooking or doing the laundry for your partner. Dinner chat resumes... 

Its just sex, it's not like you will get pregnant or something....

how old are you guest123?

how much experience you have in our world..

Steve5380 has seen quite a lot to state his opinion and sharing..

you?

[Steve5380]

7 hours ago, fab said:

 

Karma knows. 

 

Not to mention std etc. And conscience. If u ve one.

 

LOL!  You seem so knowledgeable of what Karma knows!

Usually, there are two main unknowns about karma:

1-  is Karma a reality or a speculation.

2-  what is exactly what Karma looks at?  Does it care for religious dogmas (i.e. homosexuality is sin, polygamy is sin) ?

[fab]

I am not knowledgeable. Anyone with basic knowledge of the dharma will know that karma knows everything.

 

In order to understand n believe in karma, one needs to have affinity with the dharma. Like I said in the other thread, I wish that yours will come soon than later.

[Guest guest]

5 hours ago, Steve5380 said:

 

LOL!  You seem so knowledgeable of what Karma knows!

Usually, there are two main unknowns about karma:

1-  is Karma a reality or a speculation.

2-  what is exactly what Karma looks at?  Does it care for religious dogmas (i.e. homosexuality is sin, polygamy is sin) ?

 

1 hour ago, fab said:

I am not knowledgeable. Anyone with basic knowledge of the dharma will know that karma knows everything.

 

In order to understand n believe in karma, one needs to have affinity with the dharma. Like I said in the other thread, I wish that yours will come soon than later.

 

Buddhism still requires faith,  when it comes to reincarnation, rebirth,  concept of travelling through the different realms of existance, the concept of finite existance of the devas, deities, and gods,  the concept of being reborn into a higher being and lower being, 

 

basically, to explain the existance of suffering , duka , or the state suffering and dissatisfaction , buddha and his disciples have come out with many many buddhist type explanations which may appeal those with simple mind concept to those with ability to think very deep thoughts and metaphysics and quantum physics, space and time concepts, 

 

Buddhist like to explain things without the need to put a deity or god idea at the center of the whole universe , the deity underpinning everything,  so very dfferent from the desert religions and their deity unitarianism.

 

About sex and marriage and creation of family, Buddhist do not have a sin concept as in offence to a deity by commiting a sin , no such concept, but rather unskillful actions leading to self harm or harming others .

 

As for polygamy and homosexuality,  the basic concept is so long as what u do not cause harm physically , emotionally and financially is permissible but with the caveat that it must follow the social mores and moral of that social group .

if the action like polygamy and homosexuality is acceptable to that social group and society , then it does not cause social upheavals,  then it is permissible, 

 

Buddhist also believe in impermanence,  so everything changes , even moral codes.

 

[Steve5380]

20 minutes ago, Guest guest said:

 

About sex and marriage and creation of family, Buddhist do not have a sin concept as in offence to a deity by commiting a sin , no such concept, but rather unskillful actions leading to self harm or harming others .

As for polygamy and homosexuality,  the basic concept is so long as what u do not cause harm physically , emotionally and financially is permissible but with the caveat that it must follow the social mores and moral of that social group .

if the action like polygamy and homosexuality is acceptable to that social group and society , then it does not cause social upheavals,  then it is permissible, 

Buddhist also believe in impermanence,  so everything changes , even moral codes.

 

 

Thank you.  What you wrote coincides with my idea of Buddhism, and also with my philosophy, which can be summarized very short:  do not victimize.

The scope of what we can do is limitless as long as we don't victimize (others, ourselves, the world, the universe). This latest exchange started with this post:

 

13 hours ago, Guest Guest123 said:

Monogamous is only for people who had never had long long term relationships.. Lolz.. 

Its not even a debatable topic to start with.. 

Pointless...

You fuck outside, u go home.. Nobody knows.. you r satisfied and happy. You go back to cooking or doing the laundry for your partner. Dinner chat resumes... 

Its just sex, it's not like you will get pregnant or something....

 

to which Fab took exception by replying: "Karma knows".    This for me implies that karma is a watchdog that judges our actions and keeps records.  In the example of Guest123, "you fuck outside, u go home.. Nobody knows".  "... go back cooking or doing the laundry for your partner, dinner chat resumes".

 

Clearly the partner does not know of the fuck outside, and therefore is not affected by it.  So... why should karma care, if there was no victimization?  Is it so difficult to agree that sex itself does not victimize, but deception, cheating, jealousy,  STDs do?  If he fucks outside, uses protection, takes care that the partner will not know about...   what is left for "karma" to do?

[fab]

4 hours ago, Guest guest said:

 

 

Buddhism still requires faith, 

 

Without affinity there's no chance for faith.

 

4 hours ago, Guest guest said:

 

About sex and marriage and creation of family, Buddhist do not have a sin concept as in offence to a deity by commiting a sin , no such concept, but rather unskillful actions leading to self harm or harming others .

 

As for polygamy and homosexuality,  the basic concept is so long as what u do not cause harm physically , emotionally and financially is permissible but with the caveat that it must follow the social mores and moral of that social group .

if the action like polygamy and homosexuality is acceptable to that social group and society , then it does not cause social upheavals,  then it is permissible, 

 

Buddhist also believe in impermanence,  so everything changes , even moral codes.

 

 

It is said in the Parabhava Sutta that "a man who is not satisfied with one woman and seeks out other women is on the path to decline". Other fragments in the Buddhist scripture can be found that seem to treat polygamy unfavorably, leading some authors to conclude that Buddhism generally does not approve of it.

 

polygamy is a form lust and hence,  greed which is one of 3 poisons.

 

 

 

[Steve5380]

25 minutes ago, fab said:

 

polygamy is a form lust and hence,  greed which is one of 3 poisons.

 

 

Polygamy is the result of lust.  But so are babies.  Therefore, lust is a human necessity.

Greed is excessive desire.  But we can be polygamous without  excessive desire. 

Excessive desire can lead to jerking off three times a day,  without any trace of polygamy.

If one indulges three times a year in having casual sex this is polygamy, but not necessarily excessive desire,  sexual greed.

 

I don't find your definitions so clear cut, instead they are full of exceptions.

Instead, I prefer the idea that pleasures engaged in moderation are not too bad.

 

[Zackling]

As long as a man has his dick.. he will sow his seeds far & wide.. 

 

Next topic... !!!!

[Guest Guest]

6 hours ago, Zackling said:

As long as a man has his dick.. he will sow his seeds far & wide.. 

 

Next topic... !!!!

 

It is not even the 7th year yet and the wedding anniversary is coming up soon some more, and can still come up with such comments...? Well done. If you want to sow your seeds far and wide, then get married for what? 

[Steve5380]

6 hours ago, Zackling said:

As long as a man has his dick.. he will sow his seeds far & wide.. 

 

Next topic... !!!!

 

Why don't you start a topic, instead of looking down on the topics of others?

[Guest Guest123]

2 hours ago, Steve5380 said:

 

Why don't you start a topic, instead of looking down on the topics of others?

This isn't worth a topic to be talking about.

It's only a problem when u make it a problem. 

Why would u make it a problem?? 

Like as if we tell thread starter, oh cause cannot satisfy but still love each other, the thread starter will accept. It probably be a "but that's still cheating" 

Then different people will have different views.. So fuck it.. Why bother answering questions like this that goes round and round? Than some smart alec will come out with something that like karma.. Dude, everything has repercussions.... Probably u just sit there and watch the wall u won't have karma. Another one will come out with some religious shit soon.

Lolz... Keyboard warriors feel satisfied to put their lame ass comments on every fucking single thread. Practicing your engrish ah or composition skills? 

Btw, unlike you guys I don't even bother answering someone asking about my age and experience on a "attached and playing outside" topic... It's not even relevant to the topic.. Another, "cause I need to respond to him" kinda warrior.

 

[Steve5380]

3 hours ago, Guest Guest123 said:

This isn't worth a topic to be talking about.

It's only a problem when u make it a problem. 

Why would u make it a problem?? 

Like as if we tell thread starter, oh cause cannot satisfy but still love each other, the thread starter will accept. It probably be a "but that's still cheating" 

Then different people will have different views.. So fuck it.. Why bother answering questions like this that goes round and round? Than some smart alec will come out with something that like karma.. Dude, everything has repercussions.... Probably u just sit there and watch the wall u won't have karma. Another one will come out with some religious shit soon.

Lolz... Keyboard warriors feel satisfied to put their lame ass comments on every fucking single thread. Practicing your engrish ah or composition skills? 

Btw, unlike you guys I don't even bother answering someone asking about my age and experience on a "attached and playing outside" topic... It's not even relevant to the topic.. Another, "cause I need to respond to him" kinda warrior.

 

 

So why are you posting in a topic that isn't worth be talking about?

 

As a "keyboard warrior" we can practice our English, learn new words, but more importantly we are exposed to new ideas. "Buddhism is impermanence".  We should be willing to change our ideologies, our beliefs if we want to grow. Also, defending our own convictions clarifies them in our mind.  I don't find anything wrong in discussing, conversing, arguing in a civilized way.  But you are entitled to your own feelings about that.

.

Edited February 5, 2019 by Steve5380

[Guest Le Fou]

Sexual predators?

[Steve5380]

20 hours ago, Guest Le Fou said:

Sexual predators?

 

If you like to dine in fine sea-food restaurants and steak houses,

does this make you an "animal predator"?  

[Guest Grumpboi]

I don't understand why people can't stay committed and faithful to their partner?

 

Are Gay relationship more prone to cheating/Infidelity? 

 

I seen many cases where my friends relationship ended, it's all for the same reason. 

 

 

 

[Guest 11years]

6 minutes ago, Guest Grumpboi said:

I don't understand why people can't stay committed and faithful to their partner?

 

Are Gay relationship more prone to cheating/Infidelity? 

 

I seen many cases where my friends relationship ended, it's all for the same reason. 

 

 

 

How about yourself?

 

It seems such a norm that everyone cheats, in one way or another.

 

Straight couples have their fair share too.

[sam8899]

13 minutes ago, Guest Grumpboi said:

I don't understand why people can't stay committed and faithful to their partner?

 

Are Gay relationship more prone to cheating/Infidelity? 

 

I seen many cases where my friends relationship ended, it's all for the same reason. 

 

 

Have you been in a long term relationship?

 

[Guest duh]

1 hour ago, Guest Grumpboi said:

I don't understand why people can't stay committed and faithful to their partner?

 

Are Gay relationship more prone to cheating/Infidelity? 

 

I seen many cases where my friends relationship ended, it's all for the same reason. 

 

 

 

you have the wrong circles of friends.

 

I see mine all stable faithful and happy after many years

[FattChoy]

1 hour ago, Guest Grumpboi said:

I don't understand why people can't stay committed and faithful to their partner?

 

Are Gay relationship more prone to cheating/Infidelity? 

 

I seen many cases where my friends relationship ended, it's all for the same reason. 

 

 

 

 

From 'The Picture of Dorian Gray' by Oscar Wilde (1891) :

 

"You seem to forget that I am married, and the one charm of marriage is that it makes a life of deception necessary for both parties. I never know where my  wife is, and my wife never knows what I am doing. When we meet,—we do meet occasionally, when we dine out together, or go down to the duke’s,— we tell each other the most absurd stories with the most serious faces. My wife is very good at it,— much better,  in fact, than  I am. She never gets confused over her dates, and I always do. But when she does find me out, she makes no row at all. I sometimes wish she would; but she merely laughs at me." 

 

[evianguy]

Trend? It’s been happening for centuries. What happened that brought on this query?

[Zackling]

yawn~~~

[Guest Terry Chan]

The reason is difffent people have different definitions of cheating .

examples:

1) hand job only is not cheating 

2) oral only not cheating 

3) never cum means not cheating 

4) if not caught, means not counted 

5) open relationship , so cheating not counted 

6) the other partner also do it , so not counted 

7) my heart still with him, only body action so not counted 

😎 it meant nothing , so not counted 

 

 

 

 

[FattChoy]

29 minutes ago, Guest Terry Chan said:

The reason is difffent people have different definitions of cheating .

examples:

1) hand job only is not cheating 

2) oral only not cheating 

3) never cum means not cheating 

4) if not caught, means not counted 

5) open relationship , so cheating not counted 

6) the other partner also do it , so not counted 

7) my heart still with him, only body action so not counted 

😎 it meant nothing , so not counted 

 

 

 

 

Cheating starts from the heart/mind.

 

[Guest Can bet like that?]

a friend lost a bet. No money to pay up. send his partner as a pawn to offset. Can meh ?

 

Then he was shaved head to toe to fulfil the bet in a sauna.

 

The bet winners were on look out to take the pawn.