Do Chinese Guys Only Go For Chinese Guys? + Why do Chinese prefer also Chinese? (compiled)

[adude_89]

On 10/5/2014 at 9:31 AM, TheAntisen said:

As much as people want to deny it, color matters.

 

What you wear, how you look, the color of your skin, your hairstyle, your build, your height, your upbringing, how you feel, how you speak, how you walk, how you stand, the people you know, the amount of money you make, your intelligence, and even what you eat all plays a part in how people perceive you,

 

With so many 'variables', it's easy to understand why people tend to go for people who are similar to themselves. "This guy does what I know and am familiar with, so it must be easier to establish a connection," is pretty much what is going on in their heads. You can never deny the feeling of familiarity because it directly plays in to safety, which is part of Maslow's hierarchy of needs.

 

I think what you need to ask yourself is why does it bother you so much. Does it make you feel bad about yourself? Does it make you feel unwanted? Unloved? If so, you have all the right to feel these things because that's part and parcel of what a minority in any country has to go through. But like anything that causes you suffering, use it to become wiser and more understanding of the world around you. As someone who once went through this exact same train of thought, it is something that can be overcome once you see some redeeming qualities in yourself. I think many people on this forum will agree with the fact that it's so much more important and rewarding to put in effort to love yourself rather than to question why people don't find you desirable. 

 

..

Edited March 1, 2022 by adude_89
...

[Guest Guest]

Instead of setting so many criteria, why not just find someone to love and cherish?

[Guest nangnang]

once someone decides on going for an Indian guy comes the ... should i go for an educated indian guy that is a graduate? or someone who is tall? well known in the community? bla bla .. 

 

At the end of the day conscious or not, everyone has different factors when it comes to who we want our partners to be 

 

Yes this is a good point to bring up. The thing I notice about my friends in inter-racial couplings be they straight or gay, is that they have similiar backgrounds. They have the same level of education (somehow, it seems to be more common among graduates), same socioeconomic background, same interests and tastes in things, speak English at home or even same religion. Even if they were born into different religious traditions, they seem to disregard religion and live life to their own rules. Race for them retreats into the background. The bigger thing at play here, I feel, is socioeconomic class.

Basically, the same things that draw straight interracial couples together are at play in gay relationships I feel.

 

[Guest Guest]

I like Chinese guys. Sometimes I fancy having a chinese bf haha

Like some chinese fancy an angmo bf. They are kinda racist against their own kind. Ah... food for thought!

[fab]

Do Indian Guys Only Go For Indian Guys in India?

Do Malay Guys Only Go For Malay Guys in Malaysia?

[adude_89]

Yes this is a good point to bring up. The thing I notice about my friends in inter-racial couplings be they straight or gay, is that they have similiar backgrounds. They have the same level of education (somehow, it seems to be more common among graduates), same socioeconomic background, same interests and tastes in things, speak English at home or even same religion. Even if they were born into different religious traditions, they seem to disregard religion and live life to their own rules. Race for them retreats into the background. The bigger thing at play here, I feel, is socioeconomic class.

Basically, the same things that draw straight interracial couples together are at play in gay relationships I feel.

 

 

id have to agree strongly with this. 

 

if i use my own example,  both my partner and i have similar backgrounds in that we have a very strong connection with our own family. we both have our degrees and earn similar salary. we both have similar spending power (although he knows how to pinch a penny more than i do ). as for language, to be honest he speaks dialect to his parents and i use english at home. but that has never ever been an issue to us. cause at the end of the day everyone still uses english in the work place / outside of home no? 

[futurelinguist]

This ^^^^.

 

Race is but one factor albeit a strong decision maker or breaker for most. But once someone decides on going for an Indian guy comes the ... should i go for an educated indian guy that is a graduate? or someone who is tall? well known in the community? bla bla .. 

 

At the end of the day conscious or not, everyone has different factors when it comes to who we want our partners to be 

True there are many factors in play. 

 

Instead of setting so many criteria, why not just find someone to love and cherish?

haha that's easier said than done. 

 

Like some chinese fancy an angmo bf. They are kinda racist against their own kind. Ah... food for thought!

Hmm.. i think fancy and racist are 2 different things? There are a few people I know that never expected themselves to be with someone of the same race despite fancying another race.

[melvinck]

I'm Chinese and have been with my white partner for 10 yrs. We are now living together in US.

So, do Chinese only go for Chinese guys? Definitely not in my case.

[Guest tru]

Do Indian Guys Only Go For Indian Guys in India?

Do Malay Guys Only Go For Malay Guys in Malaysia?

 

If indeed your implication that they don't just go for their own race, unlike Chinese guys here, then that points to attractiveness and boyfriend ideals in society. Perhaps our perception of beauty and attractiveness are in favor of Chinese, and that a Chinese is most ideal for a partner by many people's standards. So much so that amidst a predominantly Chinese population these minority races actually prefer them to their own race, when in a country where their own race predominates, they are still open to Chinese or maybe even prefer them already. Obviously these are sweeping statements. I don't know, but if you choose to see things through a racist lens then that's what you'll see. Perhaps if you see it in the light of general attractiveness and desirability it may be closer to the truth.

[Guest tru]

If indeed your implication that they don't just go for their own race, unlike Chinese guys here, then that points to attractiveness and boyfriend ideals in society. Perhaps our perception of beauty and attractiveness are in favor of Chinese, and that a Chinese is most ideal for a partner by many people's standards. So much so that amidst a predominantly Chinese population these minority races actually prefer them to their own race, when in a country where their own race predominates, they are still open to Chinese or maybe even prefer them already. Obviously these are sweeping statements. I don't know, but if you choose to see things through a racist lens then that's what you'll see. Perhaps if you see it in the light of general attractiveness and desirability it may be closer to the truth.

If indeed your implication that they don't just go for their own race is true, unlike Chinese guys here, then that points to attractiveness and boyfriend ideals in society.

[futurelinguist]

If indeed your implication that they don't just go for their own race is true, unlike Chinese guys here, then that points to attractiveness and boyfriend ideals in society.

Think there's some truth in this due to the majority being Chinese in Sg.

[Guest guest]

I am Malay and my life partner is a Chinese guy. We have been together for 17 years (and still counting) in a monogamy relationship. It was love at first sight for both of us. We meet due to work stuff and madly fall in love with each other. I took a big risk to confess my love to him (I don't know if he is gay) which is something I've never done before. So it was nice feeling to know that he is madly in love with me too . I guess when things happen, it will just happen.

 

We seems to have our preference but when love comes, it will just come and all preference will be forgotten.

[Guest Raiden Alpha]

Every culture and ethnicity have it own culture soul. It is hard for other races to connect and understand this aspect that's why for some people interracial relationship does not appeal to them.

This rule doesn't apply to all though most can feel this difference in their life when they come across it.

It's like some things/values/beliefs/concepts cannot be adequately understood by other expect your own kind. That's the reason,a very simple and subtle one too though it is complex.

[ManFit36]

I like tanned cute Malay guys. They r just so sexy n I have no immunity to them for sex. But for relationship I will consider Chinese for better communication to achieve good harmony after getting "married".

[Guest Guest]

I am a Singaporean Chinese guy who would only go

for other Chinese speaking guy who speaks dialects , eg . Cantonese , Hokkein , etc . I hate those Chinese guy who speaks English extremely well ! They are usually bitchy , mindset like a female ..especially the younger ones......and they usually scare the shit out of me ....

[Guest Guest]

I am a Singaporean Chinese guy who would only go

for other Chinese speaking guy who speaks dialects , eg . Cantonese , Hokkein , etc . I hate those Chinese guy who speaks English extremely well ! They are usually bitchy , mindset like a female ..especially the younger ones......and they usually scare the shit out of me ....

not really la, if they brought up from a very rich family and good background, they normally don't act like potato or banana, they are very well manner

[Guest Guest]

not really la, if they brought up from a very rich family and good background, they normally don't act like potato or banana, they are very well manner

It's no wonder I did not get to meet them ! I am not rich !! Precisely what I meant , they will not mix with others who do not speak Engl

[Guest Guest]

It's no wonder I did not get to meet them ! I am not rich !! Precisely what I meant , they will not mix with others who do not speak Engl

Speak English well enough is what I meant .

Their preference in the west makes me feel they are so mixed up with identifying their roots ! Very strange ....

[Guest hggs]

People are fearful of the unknowns or little-knowns. Generally speaking, Chinese make up a large proportion of the population in Singapore. Therefore, they tend to encounter more of their same race from a young age right from P1 through to NS and beyond. For many aspects of their lives, for example, culturally and linguistically, they share many commonalities. They are uncertain what to expect from a dude from another race unless they have close friends belonging to that particular race. Taking the first step to dis-spell any misconceptions and developing greater understanding of a different race takes time and effort. Comparatively, it is far easier to accept a dude from your own race and in the case of Chinese, the abundance of them in SG from gives them less incentive to go for other races. 

 

Of course, there are those who date other races exclusively or are open to interracial partners. The reasons for doing so are vast; they can be totally turned off by their own races or date other races for the thrill of it or what have you. No simple one or two explanations to explain these groups. These are the people which should excite non-Chinese who likes to date Chinese boys.

 

 

[Guest likechinese]

I am superficial. The reason why I date Chinese guys is because they tend to have fair skin, single eye-lids and are uncut. 

 

(I fear for my life. hahha)

[bonekaz]

Ahh but you see everyone is superficial to a certain extent, and that's normal. Something I find interesting though is how some people talk about only the physical when talking about interracial dating. I literally have guys who tell me they have fetishes for Malay men, which makes me wonder if I'm just a sexual object that is appealing to them. I think if you're pursuing a deeper connection with someone, then you shouldn't be bound to the limitations of the physical body. It takes time, and even I find myself being closed to exploring the idea of having a relationship with certain races, but I think it begins with us stopping ourselves from objectifying each other.

[Butterscotch]

Yes this is a good point to bring up. The thing I notice about my friends in inter-racial couplings be they straight or gay, is that they have similiar backgrounds. They have the same level of education (somehow, it seems to be more common among graduates), same socioeconomic background, same interests and tastes in things, speak English at home or even same religion. Even if they were born into different religious traditions, they seem to disregard religion and live life to their own rules. Race for them retreats into the background. The bigger thing at play here, I feel, is socioeconomic class.

Basically, the same things that draw straight interracial couples together are at play in gay relationships I feel.

 

 

Isn't this kind of like a blanket statement though? Because my ex (Chinese) and I (Malay) could not have been any more different; we are practically poles apart. I do have to concur about the religion and races aspects though.

[keroberos]

Chinese here and i prefer dating chinese. sg chinese, taiwanese, hong kong chinese. but not mainlanders. I think it's in the face/features and the way they talk. 

Also, the other races just doesnt do for me. except for japanese. 

[zwei]

Sorry TS, as a Chinese i prefer chinese too :/ chindians are fine, Taiwanese hongkongers and whites :/ omgawd I'm a racist for having a preference (

Edited October 7, 2014 by zwei

[futurelinguist]

Thanks for the many responses, guys. i gave it some critical (or lack of, hehe) thought, coupled with what some of you have said and realised the possible reasoning behind what looks and sounds like a phenomenon to me:

1. It has to do with upbringing. Some chaps are just brought up in a way where everyone surrounded by them are Chinese. This probably has lead to the impression that one should only date Chinese because that's the only people he has been hanging out with since young -sticking to the status quo. Of course, this would correlate with the next point.

2. Language barrier / preference - with such an upbringing, some are just more comfortable speaking with someone of the same race who converses in the same dialect. This of course could be compared to the notion that some Chinese hate (or even to the extend of abhor) someone of the same race who does not communicate in the same language. This somehow goes back to upbringing - if one was raised in a very "Chinese way" or "modern way".

3. Ability to only appreciate the looks and features of the same race. This is where once again, preference comes to play. It could be due to media exposure since young where a Chinese fella looking a particular way would be deemed as the ideal image of what is the standard to achieve when dating someone. (I swear it was the Japanese craze before but now it's shifted to Korean. What's next?)

4. Religion - this is pretty easy to comprehend why.

5. Some people are just racists. (Don't start beef with me for saying this. Look at the responses above.)

However, there are many guys making an effort to explore the different boundaries. Salute to these guys and yeah, I'd be doing the same, be it a Chinese, malay, Indian or Lord knows what he is.

I should probably not have bothered typing all these out and be marking instead :/

[darkflame]

I'd just say the media is a large factor in influencing what we like.

And also when you are younger.

In Singapore, no matter the ethnic origin of the person, the general liking is skewed towards a local Chinese face.

As such, we perceive the typical partner as someone who looks Chinese or similar.

I do admit I find white guys with blonde hair (and blue eyes) very hot and ideal.

My father fed me a lot of Hollywood media as a kid and I grew up being exposed to anything ang moh, especially the typical blonde American face.

Even in my MNC office, a blonde guy stands out more handsomely than other people, including brunettes.

As such, it's your preference and mutual respect is the way to go.

I do like Asians who look more 'American' or have some features of this 'blonde American' look.

Back to topic, likewise in Malaysia, I am told that Malays prefer Malays and are not into Chinese mostly.

And in America, we have the potato queen and sticky rice concepts too.

It's the media.

And on a side note, even if someone rejects you rudely because he's not into other Chinese, would you even want to accept such a person?

It might be better that things don't work out than turning your next few months 8nto a wreckage.

Edited October 7, 2014 by darkflame

[futurelinguist]

I'd just say the media is a large factor in influencing what we like.

And also when you are younger.

In Singapore, no matter the ethnic origin of the person, the general liking is skewed towards a local Chinese face.

As such, we perceive the typical partner as someone who looks Chinese or similar.

I do admit I find white guys with blonde hair (and blue eyes) very hot and ideal.

My father fed me a lot of Hollywood media as a kid and I grew up being exposed to anything ang moh, especially the typical blonde American face.

Even in my MNC office, a blonde guy stands out more handsomely than other people, including brunettes.

As such, it's your preference and mutual respect is the way to go.

I do like Asians who look more 'American' or have some features of this 'blonde American' look.

Back to topic, likewise in Malaysia, I am told that Malays prefer Malays and are not into Chinese mostly.

And in America, we have the potato queen and sticky rice concepts too.

It's the media.

And on a side note, even if someone rejects you rudely because he's not into other Chinese, would you even want to accept such a person?

It might be better that things don't work out than turning your next few months 8nto a wreckage.

 

I guess that's the power of media (I remember writing this sentence so many times during my poly days). The effect and approach is the same but due to geographical differences, it varies accordingly. Malaysian Malays would like Malays. Singaporean Chinese would like Chinese. Etc. Kinda sad actually.

[Guest guest]

At first, I thought it would be easier for me to recognize the potential partner's individuality. Then I realize it would be difficult for me to dismiss him with simple derogatory racist remarks. Stemmed from the travelling days, passing comments such the locals were so and so, instead of this single individual was so and so. So, the journey is still on.

[futurelinguist]

At first, I thought it would be easier for me to recognize the potential partner's individuality. Then I realize it would be difficult for me to dismiss him with simple derogatory racist remarks. Stemmed from the travelling days, passing comments such the locals were so and so, instead of this single individual was so and so. So, the journey is still on.

Erm okay.. Honestly, I don't understand what you just said. lol.

[Guest Guest]

At first, I thought it would be easier for me to recognize the potential partner's individuality. Then I realize it would be difficult for me to dismiss him with simple derogatory racist remarks. Stemmed from the travelling days, passing comments such the locals were so and so, instead of this single individual was so and so. So, the journey is still on.

Omg dun understand a shat

[Guest Guest]

I think it's a personal preference. I find Malay guys very attractive though I've not dated any.

U like malay cocks?

[Guest Guest]

Lots of malay guys ive seen on the mrts and streets here are smoking hot! The most I can say about chinese ive seen here is very sexy, very hunky, very hot, so hunky, so sexy, so hot, etc. Lol! Not the same level. There's something smothering and enchanting about malay guys lacking in the chinese guys. It's all in the facial features, dress sense, hair, skin, body and most of all, attitude.

[futurelinguist]

Omg dun understand a shat

Hahahahahaha!!

Lots of malay guys ive seen on the mrts and streets here are smoking hot! The most I can say about chinese ive seen here is very sexy, very hunky, very hot, so hunky, so sexy, so hot, etc. Lol! Not the same level. There's something smothering and enchanting about malay guys lacking in the chinese guys. It's all in the facial features, dress sense, hair, skin, body and most of all, attitude.

Have you ever dated one before?

[snowball]

If you refering dating, yes, i am a sticky rice.

[Angelix]

Since I stay in both MY and Sg, I do find similar problems in both places but Sg has it worse. It's an undeniable fact that Chinese tend to stick with their own racial circle in dating or even in choosing friends. For instance in FB, you can see all the popular Chinese gay dudes hang out with other equally popular Chinese gay dudes. It is very rare to find a non-Chinese person in that single large group hanging out togehter. In MY, due to the fact that the population of Malays are much larger than Chinese, you do often find interacial couples together from time to time, In Sg however, Chinese gay dudes have this weird notion where it is very embarrassing or "wasted" to be seen dating a non-Chinese guy. Gay guys in Sg not only have to deal with self-acceptance of other races with regards to relationship, they also deeply care about how other view them. My friend recieved so many comments or rather criticims from other Chinese gay dudes when he was dating an Indian guy. Most of the remarks revolved around "You can do so much better" or "Are you blind? What is so good about this fella?". Be in mind that the Indian guy is tall, good looking and works as a model.

 

Singaporean people are so obsessed about race. When people message me in gay app, one of the first few questions they would ask is "Am I mixed?" or "Am I Chinese?". So, I started to do some experiments.

 

If I say "No, I'm Chinese." The response is always positive.

If I say "Yes, I'm Malay mixed". The response is 50/50.

If I say "Yes. I'm Chinese mixed". The response is generally positive.

 

Can you see that? Just by changing the race, people's perception towards you can change 180 degree. Come on, if you messaged me first, it means that you already take a liking to me. Yet, the initial feeling dissapear once I revealed my race.

[Guest tru]

Since I stay in both MY and Sg, I do find similar problems in both places but Sg has it worse. It's an undeniable fact that Chinese tend to stick with their own racial circle in dating or even in choosing friends. For instance in FB, you can see all the popular Chinese gay dudes hang out with other equally popular Chinese gay dudes. It is very rare to find a non-Chinese person in that single large group hanging out togehter. In MY, due to the fact that the population of Malays are much larger than Chinese, you do often find interacial couples together from time to time, In Sg however, Chinese gay dudes have this weird notion where it is very embarrassing or "wasted" to be seen dating a non-Chinese guy. Gay guys in Sg not only have to deal with self-acceptance of other races with regards to relationship, they also deeply care about how other view them. My friend recieved so many comments or rather criticims from other Chinese gay dudes when he was dating an Indian guy. Most of the remarks revolved around "You can do so much better" or "Are you blind? What is so good about this fella?". Be in mind that the Indian guy is tall, good looking and works as a model.

 

Singaporean people are so obsessed about race. When people message me in gay app, one of the first few questions they would ask is "Am I mixed?" or "Am I Chinese?". So, I started to do some experiments.

 

If I say "No, I'm Chinese." The response is always positive.

If I say "Yes, I'm Malay mixed". The response is 50/50.

If I say "Yes. I'm Chinese mixed". The response is generally positive.

 

Can you see that? Just by changing the race, people's perception towards you can change 180 degree. Come on, if you messaged me first, it means that you already take a liking to me. Yet, the initial feeling dissapear once I revealed my race.

 

Whatever mindset one uses to view the world will invariably color it. That is not to discredit your opinion and experience. But experiences and opinions often become prisons in which our minds are trapped. For example:

 

"It is very rare to find a non-Chinese person in that single large group hanging out togehter. In MY, due to the fact that the population of Malays are much larger than Chinese, you do often find interacial couples together from time to time,"

 

When two things happen together or are circumstantially related, there may or may not be causation.

 

"Chinese gay dudes have this weird notion where it is very embarrassing or "wasted" to be seen dating a non-Chinese guy."

 

In all opinions there is always some truth, but try to see the multifaceted world in which we live and not fixate one's mind on one facet thinking that is the reality of things. 

 

"Singaporean people are so obsessed about race. When people message me in gay app, one of the first few questions they would ask is "Am I mixed?" or "Am I Chinese?". So, I started to do some experiments.

 

If I say "No, I'm Chinese." The response is always positive.

If I say "Yes, I'm Malay mixed". The response is 50/50.

If I say "Yes. I'm Chinese mixed". The response is generally positive."

 

Where the entire reality of gay apps and the online gay community tends towards the degradation of character, virtue and all that is finer in human nature, your fixation on this small aspect seems frivolous. It's like worrying about whether you get to sit in a first class life boat when more than half of the people on board Titanic will perish. Why expect people to embrace all other colors and not be racist (your definition, not mine), when these very people have sunk into debauchery without the slightest scruple, when they see no humanity in people but mere skin and flesh, when the great souls within them are enslaved by the bodies that are meant to be their servant not master?

[Guest tru]

With all that said here is my opinion: yes most Chinese guys only go for Chinese guys to my limited knowledge. But why fault others when they are merely seeking what they desire in a partner? Aren't the Malays and Indians doing exactly that but in a greater extent when they seek Chinese guys? If they don't prefer Chinese guys over guys of their own race there shall be no angst about the state of affairs and most certainly no obsession or simmering unhappiness.

[Guest wozzit]

Whatever mindset one uses to view the world will invariably color it.

 

True. But if all of us stuck with the beliefs we are brought up with and put into practice as teenagers and young adults, God help the world! The fact is, the human mind has the ability to reject those inbred beliefs - and frequently does so as we get older. Open your minds, guys. Not just in terms of sexual partners and lovers. Open it up to all the possibilities offered to us in our relatively short life spans.

 

 

yes most Chinese guys only go for Chinese guys to my limited knowledge. But why fault others when they are merely seeking what they desire in a partner?

 

Agreed! And it's understandable. But why not simply accept we are all different? We don't have to do what others do just because of our ethnic origins.

[Guest Guest]

Agreed! And it's understandable. But why not simply accept we are all different? We don't have to do what others do just because of our ethnic origins.

accept and preferably are totally different, i can have different races of good friends, but if bf, i prefer chinese, if you really understood, you should know we all have different taste too.

[Butterscotch]

Since I stay in both MY and Sg, I do find similar problems in both places but Sg has it worse. It's an undeniable fact that Chinese tend to stick with their own racial circle in dating or even in choosing friends. For instance in FB, you can see all the popular Chinese gay dudes hang out with other equally popular Chinese gay dudes. It is very rare to find a non-Chinese person in that single large group hanging out togehter. In MY, due to the fact that the population of Malays are much larger than Chinese, you do often find interacial couples together from time to time, In Sg however, Chinese gay dudes have this weird notion where it is very embarrassing or "wasted" to be seen dating a non-Chinese guy. Gay guys in Sg not only have to deal with self-acceptance of other races with regards to relationship, they also deeply care about how other view them. My friend recieved so many comments or rather criticims from other Chinese gay dudes when he was dating an Indian guy. Most of the remarks revolved around "You can do so much better" or "Are you blind? What is so good about this fella?". Be in mind that the Indian guy is tall, good looking and works as a model.

 

Singaporean people are so obsessed about race. When people message me in gay app, one of the first few questions they would ask is "Am I mixed?" or "Am I Chinese?". So, I started to do some experiments.

 

If I say "No, I'm Chinese." The response is always positive.

If I say "Yes, I'm Malay mixed". The response is 50/50.

If I say "Yes. I'm Chinese mixed". The response is generally positive.

 

Can you see that? Just by changing the race, people's perception towards you can change 180 degree. Come on, if you messaged me first, it means that you already take a liking to me. Yet, the initial feeling dissapear once I revealed my race.

 

I have gay friends of all races, in fact a few of my good gay friends are Chinese. Above it all, I feel that it is safe to maintain that everything boils down to preferences and decisions. They are not racist per se, it's just that they are more comfortable/find that it is easier to click with their own kind.

 

With regards to the SG gays being more... elitist (sorry, default setting tonight is tuned to "controversial" mode), being gay is already a minority here. Given the fact that the majority of the gay population are predominantly Chinese, hence why they would go for their own kind. Nothing wrong with that. Same as there's nothing wrong with dating a Malay, or an Indian. It is not "slumming it", "cannot find your own race that's why go into the minority of the minority" or "scrapping the bottom of the barrel", it is just their preference. The ones who think that way are the ones with the elitist mindset.

 

This is why we are plagued with such #firstworldproblems. If you observe, the heteros are more open to interracial dating.

[RatedG2]

"Genuinely not finding people you see of a certain race unattractive isn't racist. When people start saying 'all asian people are ugly' or 'I don't date black guys because they're disgusting' then it turns into a problem. Shutting out an entire race of people and leaving no possibility whatsoever in the future to date someone of that race isn't okay. If you never find a black dude cute, okay whatever.

But if you say I'd never date a black dude simply because he's black, and you would turn down a date with somebody because they're black and you have no idea what they actually look like outside of that is racist"

I think this brings up a good point

[Guest nangnang]

Isn't this kind of like a blanket statement though? Because my ex (Chinese) and I (Malay) could not have been any more different; we are practically poles apart. I do have to concur about the religion and races aspects though.

 

Well, I did mention that it was among my friends and not everyone

[Undies69]

it all depends on individual preferences...

[Gabiegab]

If I were single, I wouldn't mind dating Malay or Indian. Or ang moh. Some of them are really hot. I'm mostly an English speaker anyway.

Most important thing is chemistry.

[futurelinguist]

If I were single, I wouldn't mind dating Malay or Indian. Or ang moh. Some of them are really hot. I'm mostly an English speaker anyway.

Most important thing is chemistry.

Ohhh let me know when you're single then lol

[Guest Guest]

TS. do you have BO? that can be a dealbreaker

[futurelinguist]

TS. do you have BO? that can be a dealbreaker

Lol. Is this linked to a stereotype? I smell good 24/7

In fact there are only four things that will never want me to meet the same guy again:

1. BO

2. Bad breath

3. Bad grammar

4. Bad manners in a formal setting

Other than that, I think I can practically adore anyone.

Edited October 11, 2014 by futurelinguist

[SeannyShortcake]

Worry lesser,go out there and get your man!

[futurelinguist]

Worry lesser,go out there and get your man!

Sure gonna do so after my exams are done!

[Guest tru]

Shutting out an entire race of people and leaving no possibility whatsoever in the future to date someone of that race isn't okay. If you never find a black dude cute, okay whatever.

But if you say I'd never date a black dude simply because he's black, and you would turn down a date with somebody because they're black and you have no idea what they actually look like outside of that is racist"

I think this brings up a good point

 

Why is it not okay? What about gays? Shutting out an entire gender leaving no possibility whatsoever in the future to date someone of that gender ISN'T OKAY. It is SEXIST. How bout this: Shutting out an entire age range leaving no possibility whatsoever in the future to date someone of that age range ISN'T OKAY. It is AGEIST. Shutting out an entire religion leaving no possibility whatsoever in the future to date someone of that religion ISN'T OKAY. It's religious discrimination. Now do you see things in perspective? It is normal for people to idealise, especially when it comes to their LIFETIME PARTNERS. They know generally what they are attracted to and what they want. What I'm trying to show you is that you bring your prejudices into the arena of LOVE, which is unlike social, legal, political, economic or corporate aspects, in which refusing to hire someone of a particular race MAY indeed be racist. Also, that you impose rules of what's ok and what's not on others, without realising why you are like that.

 

BUT, I think we can safely say that many of these racists (as you name them) would fall in love if indeed someone special of their previously rejected race comes along, compelling them to slowly break down their ideals. It takes time and fate to do that; sparks fly, you'll never know.