Time Wasters (Compiled)

[Jumpup]

I don’t really post stuff here, so I’m not really sure which section is appropriate to post this. So here goes;

 

I know this topic have been posted somewhere around here but I would like to reiterate it again just cause some people out there needs some sense knocked in them before some certain fist ends up on their bloody face. Discreet people in the community are usually the prime suspect for these actions, however, they aren’t the only people to do such fucked up stunts.

 

Just yesterday, this dude and I agreed to meet up at the specific location around a certain time. I told him to promise right beforehand; if he doesn’t find me to his liking, just show up and tell me directly to me. His reply,’ ok sure, promise’. But FUCK NO, he decided to do some spying and just left me there to wait and let my time rot away. Guess he took his promise and shoved it up his loose ass, idk. Like, where’s your decency to even show up and tell me I’m not his/your type? Do you FUCKING KNOW HOW MUCH TIME IS WASTED TO GET TO AND FRO FROM THE DESTINATION, PLUS, THE TIME TAKEN TO WAIT FOR YOUR BITCH ASS TO APPEAR?!

 

I get it if you’re discreet, well, so am I. If you don’t want others to know details about you, we can agreed beforehand to not spread info about each other around, meet up (and if we don’t click) just part our separate ways. But if you’re the type to think so highly of yourself (you think you’re better-looking or muscular as compared to the other guy), just reject him ASAP through whatever app you guys have been chatting at. An immediate rejection is better that those who are left hanging and their time wasted.

 

On the other hand, I’m partially to be blamed to because I was too dumb to learn from my mistakes. Tbh, this had happened to my quite a few times. Conversations left hanging, wasting my time at a specific location bombarding the douchebag with questions while they don’t appear. I’ve should have probably learnt my lesson, but hell nah, I was think with my dick rather than my brain. Hence, I kinda deserved that for not learning from my lessons

 

I guess the takeaway from my ranting is; why can’t the person have a speck of guilty conscience within themselves and have the balls (majority of the people here are guys right?) to just tell the other guy that his not your type, hence, can immediately part ways and no one’s time is wasted. This is a vicious, stupid and ridiculous cycle that needs to be stopped immediately. It’s just sooooooo FRUSTRATING AND ANNOYING when it happened to you. To those who commit this act, you need to put yourself in other’s shoe and fucking stop this shit. Because time – which, if wasted, can never be attained back and I’m sure we can use that time wasted to do something else more beneficial that meeting your lil bitch ass pussy.  

Edited July 9, 2016 by Jumpup

[Guest Its liddat]

Common la. Fetish community, grindr, bw, all have a lot of such cowardly idiots. Somemore they are not just the young ones. Older also just as shit.

[Guest Guest]

I understand how that guy was feeling, but he was toally an ass leaving you hanging there. I once met up with this guy, he claims to be 28, but when I reach there, he was 48 wtf. But I wasn't an ass, so I approach him, watch a movie and rejected him. 

 

But whats hats your flaw? You are 1994 why would the person dispike you'd 

[Jumpup]

Well, maybe I didn't fit his expectations? Or he think he's too good looking for people like me to hang around with... idk...

[Youngun]

So did u give him a call while u waiting? Did he give any reply when he didn't show up?

[lonely57]

9 minutes ago, Jumpup said:

Well, maybe I didn't fit his expectations? Or he think he's too good looking for people like me to hang around with... idk...

 

the thing i hate about this community is most of them are out to just have fun. 

 

how did u know he even showed up and spied on u? did u spot him? maybe he didnt even show. =/ but yeah guys like these are annoying.. 

[Guest Guest]

Cool down ..some people are like that doing such things ..I had my bad experience too when I was younger just like you waited like a fool .

That's why I don't really go into gay apps ..its just a waste of time mostly impress you are really hot with a good body and face..its a very very superficial gay community anyway ..some like intelligent chats etc just look at their profile says it all . I just don't bother anymore . 

Move on and seek other avenues of knowing guys . )

Prefer guys with no airs.. simple ..period .

[Guest Guest]

Did you exchange picture with him ..

If he has seen your picture and vice versa ..he may just be making fun of you and not turning up at all .

Should really expose such evil creeps who take delight in such immature acts.

[Jumpup]

-I've bombard him with questions abt his whereabouts while waiting for him. 

 

- Abt the spying thingy, I'm under the assumption that; he should spy on me from a far or somewhere secluded to see if I'm "worthy" enough to for him to meet. Guess I was unworthy then...

 

- Luckily I didn't exchange any pics with him. But he probably have seen me from afar to know how I looked like, since I gave a description of myself to him

[Guest :-(]

Personally have met several people in this forum before. I don't really care about profile picture as they can be easily faked with lot of touch up/filters or just a blank display. If we can't hold normal messaging conversation, it is useless to meet up no matter how handsome he is. Somehow, all my dates didn't hide from me. We either have lunch, coffee or dinner. I'm quite a straightforward person and don't mind making friends with them if we clique well yet can't be lovers. Just wanna rant a little of one who kept texting me what kind of positions do I like after the meet up. Not sure why he did that but I am not happy receiving that.

 

TS, I know the excitement of meeting someone you've never seen before and he could be your soul mate. But the probability of meeting him is around 0.1% imo. So, don't expect too much. As in why did your dates not turn up, you should have constant messaging with that person before meeting up right? So if they play you out, they're really spineless assholes.

[abang]

Over the years of speed dating via the Internet and now, gay-useful apps, I dare say I have yet to "evaporate" without a trace.  I mean I/he made the effort (time and money) of wanting to meet the guy/me. If the guy is not what I've expected, I would politely tell him the truth about the mismatch. I should at the very least have a drink at McDs.  

 

 

[Guest Ener]

Well, for a start u can write up his number in every single toilet u go into. Hahaha! 

[cutejack]

Tats normal.btw dont tell me u never do tat to anyone?juz asking

[Traveler3032]

There's a reason why sometimes going to saunas is a better choice. You don't waste your time. A few times I met guys online whose pics were at least ten years old, and the weight was 10kg heavier. 

[Guest Guest]

1 hour ago, Guest Ener said:

Well, for a start u can write up his number in every single toilet u go into. Hahaha! 

There was once I made friend with this guy, didn't knew he had a boyf already. One day his bf noticed him smiling while using his phone, so he snatched his phone and found out everything. So the bf scolded me for seducing his bf when I didn't even know he was attached. The bf even threaten to write my number on the toilet doors. I found out he is a blogger, didn't knew there were such low class blogger. If he cannot maintain his man, then he is not fit to even be in a relationship. 

[Guest Savage world]

You my friend, seem like having the problem issue with "too trusting to strangers". 

Didnt your mom taught u never trust a stranger 100%.

Dont be like cigarette, they will step u after use u.. Be like a drugs, let them die for u..

[Guest photo]

2 hours ago, Jumpup said:

-I've bombard him with questions abt his whereabouts while waiting for him. 

 

- Abt the spying thingy, I'm under the assumption that; he should spy on me from a far or somewhere secluded to see if I'm "worthy" enough to for him to meet. Guess I was unworthy then...

 

- Luckily I didn't exchange any pics with him. But he probably have seen me from afar to know how I looked like, since I gave a description of myself to him

 

Better to send a photo (most recent) first before meetup.  If he (or you) don't like what he (or you) sees, then there won't be any meetup.  If he agrees to meet up after seeing your photo, then definitely no time will be wasted.

[snowball]

perhaps he is the one who think that you are too good for him and he was afraid that you will reject him, some people cannot take it, well, just move on, almost everyone in this circle encounter this before, next time just give yourself some timing, if he never appear 30 to 45 mins and w/o return msg, is time to leave.

[bigdanbeam]

I guess after several such encounters you would hv learnt not to have high hopes

 

It's a bonus if the Meetup materialises, otherwise you didn't lose much, probably just a couple of hours of your life. We should then move on

[solomondude]

Really. Its no pic no talk.

 

Pic given is blurry? Request a clear pic.

Pic given is dark? Request a clear pic.

He tells you he is discreet? NPNM. No Pic No Meet.

He tells you he is into surprise? Lies.

He says he is more handsome in real life? Cocky and delusional.

He says you can reject him on the spot if you don't like? No, he probably will see you from a hidden spot and waste your time.

 

I never meet people without a pic. Its too much uncertainty for me to handle despite how good his claims were.

Edited July 8, 2016 by solomondude

[Guest :-(]

8 minutes ago, snowball said:

perhaps he is the one who think that you are too good for him and he was afraid that you will reject him, some people cannot take it, well, just move on, almost everyone in this circle encounter this before, next time just give yourself some timing, if he never appear 30 to 45 mins and w/o return msg, is time to leave.

 

Instead of overthinking oneself that one is too good for another guy, I think we should have the courage to face the truth of what really happen and how to improve on the situation. From Ts' lesson, he should learn something already. A matter of how many times to wake up. Not all dates are a bed of roses or there won't be so many lonely single people out there cherry picking the best boyfriends for themselves.

 

I rather accept the truth, than to let the bad judge the truth.

[Jumpup]

Hi people, its good to hear different kinds of response to this situation. Thing is, his grindr profile pic is really clear.... But then again, it could be a fake/stolen photo from someone else. And honestly speaking, I have NEVER pangseh any kind of meet ups, ever. If we exchange pics before and I don't feel that we're compatible, there is no reason for a meet up, hence, I'll tell the other person immediately that I'm not interested. There is not need to beat around the bush. An immediate polite reject is always be a better thing rather then time wasting

[Kimochi]

Yes . The best is cancel the meet up so as not to waste any other people time . 

[orionmiz]

So how long did you wait before you decide that he's not going to meet you?

[rotikawin]

Just curious, how long did you wait. And what were his reasons/excuses for not showing up on time?

[Guest hello]

This circle is just a superficial community. If you don't look good enough, no one will even want to chat with you in those apps. There are people who putting fake pictures on those apps for the hope of having some hookup. And a number of guys in those apps will play prank with you, tell you the timing and location and never even appear. 

[Jumpup]

I took around 15mins to and fro = 30mins. Waited for him around 30 mins also. And nope, I didn't get any reason/respond from him when I kept asking him via the app. 

[hairy springroll]

Time wasters are assholes and losers

 

[Guest Abc]

I got scolded for politely rejecting some people who texted me..

I got scolded for ignoring some who texted me..

So how now brown cow..? 

 

[sfr]

Yasssss, the exact thread discussing the very similar situations I experience & wonder most of the time. Thanks for this and all the replies!

[lovehandle]

5 hours ago, Jumpup said:

I took around 15mins to and fro = 30mins. Waited for him around 30 mins also. And nope, I didn't get any reason/respond from him when I kept asking him via the app. 

I have similar experience too hence I always ensure he get my description well (even if there is no photo) , and  I will try to lower his expectation first

[Jumpup]

4 hours ago, Guest Abc said:

I got scolded for politely rejecting some people who texted me..

I got scolded for ignoring some who texted me..

So how now brown cow..? 

 

Bro, polite rejection and then getting scolded is wayyyy better than time wasted. And he still chat with u aft ur reply, than thats his problem, u've done ur part. No time is wasted in meeting up, right?

[Kibakun]

One way around this predicament is to arrange your dates to be at a place where you would be happy to hang out alone anyway. If they don't show up, you're still enjoying yourself at your favourite mall or cafe etc.

 

Mentally prepare yourself to have a good time with or without him showing up. If he doesn't , then it's his loss, not yours. 

[inamoto]

think it is just basic manners and courtesy...

[Cube3]

Strategy: is there such a location as a non-spyable place? Say, to meet you, he has to enter location and if he decides to scoot off, you can immediately spot and know, and save on the waiting?

[KENZ]

On July 8, 2016 at 11:47 PM, Jumpup said:

I took around 15mins to and fro = 30mins. Waited for him around 30 mins also. And nope, I didn't get any reason/respond from him when I kept asking him via the app. 

 

Don't let all these people get to you. I don't think he spied on you, I honestly think he did not even turn up.

Why they behave this way I don't know. Maybe they last minute found someone else to meet, maybe they feel imbalance thus they take it out on others. But still they should not treat people this way. 

[Guest merry]

I've tried without exchanging pics, just for the fun of it.

He didn't show up. But I selected a quiet corner and where if someone want a closer look at me has to walk by.

I noticed someone walked by twice.

Frankly, he's cmi.

 

Later he msg me that he was afraid that I'll reject him.

I don't reply and let him waste his time asking for another meet.

[Guest Wasted]

I kena a few before. Online chat use fake stolen pics, IRL no show wif cock excuses or just no show. And then they use different accounts to stalk you. Even name they give also suspect - Timmy Constantine.  

Got one claim to be famous golfer, another tv personalty, or Infantry officer. Probably all lies. Only after some months a friend told me he was also harass by same persons. Then we compare and lo its the same asshole! 

[Guest Rocket]

Maybe I am fortunate that I have not encountered such a situation where it feels like being sabotaged, yes it can be frustrating. 

 

That is the reason why I do prefer to have a more in-depth chat (via apps) first before agreeing to meet. Although some may feel it is wasting time but that is how I assess how sincere, genuine and sane he is. 

 

Most people would say they are okay with rejections (talk is cheap), however not everyone can take rejections in person, esp if they are aware they are not attractive. It is an ego thing in human, so I don't usually believe in such words. 

 

I don't trust those who ask to meet too quickly, as they probably are doing this to many, casting the fishnet wide trying to catch a few at least. These people are likely to play you out. 

[kratos]

Usually if the profile pics are too pretty, go do a google search on it, I found quite a number of fake profiles on the app this way.

 

I usually send my uglier photos (not too perfect), so the other party will have a lower expectation. But it helps that I'm only looking for dates. I think one important aspect is both parties have to exchange photo, even though I don't put up a profile image, I will send my photos if I initiate conversation.

 

Luckily so far when I was using the app, I haven't met anyone who stood me up, but there's far too many countless awkward dates. I just dread using the app ever again, photoshopped profile pics, rude conversations, weird profiles, just too easy to paint a rosy picture of yourself on the app.

[ouat1972]

Sadly these will continue to happen. It's human nature I guess. 

[Mando]

I also have been left high and dry during some meet ups. Some of these people already have such intentions way before arranging such meet ups. They think it is their right to play people out and took joy in leaving others with their waiting game. Such people are sick in the mind. What we can do is to move on and be more careful in our future dealings.

[Guest Thinkpls]

I thought the first thing you'd do is to eliminate the need for spying to begin with? If everyone has no photos on the app then everyone's time is wasted. 

 

There are also incredibly selfish discreet people who talk to others without a face, effectively saying: I can choose who I want to talk to and since I've chosen you because you are to my liking, you should talk to me no matter what because I'm discreet. 

 

That's why some of us choose to meet first without chatting much. To prevent a waste of time and utter disappointment, I.e. When that guy turns out guniang, way too skinny, or acts weird. 

 

That guy shouldn't have stood you up. But now you know being faceless or sending sneaky, misleading photos wastes your time and that of others. 

[lonely57]

Sometimes I feel like if u suddenly ask for a meet up when u just met online is a bit fast? Like suddenly I pm someone and say. Hey let's meet up. Just feels abit rushed.. Then if u go meet up and its not compatible then its a wasted trip. Better to chat online first get to know a little background first . just my opinion. 

[Guest Guest]

There are some who are worst ..you exchange your face pic and full clothes body pic upon mutual agreement to exchange  and he does not reciprocate. I don't think I'm cmi probably he is the one . Should really expose this guy in those app to others to beware .

So enough of apps for me . Seek other avenues of meeting guys . Its his loss to 

 

[bigdanbeam]

Just encountered a time waster.

 

Arranged to meet, then texted him thru grindr that I arrived. And I got blocked.

 

Fortunately I wasn't expecting much. 

 

Seriously, get a life.

 

 

[lonely57]

6 hours ago, Guest Guest said:

There are some who are worst ..you exchange your face pic and full clothes body pic upon mutual agreement to exchange  and he does not reciprocate. I don't think I'm cmi probably he is the one . Should really expose this guy in those app to others to beware .

So enough of apps for me . Seek other avenues of meeting guys . Its his loss to 

 

 

that happened to me a few times on grindr too. they just stopped talking straight when u send them ur pic. thats why i will never send any other pic. my profile pic is all they are getting.. 

[TamPenis]

The other type of time wasters is the chat response time. You responded to his chat promptly. However, it took him hours or even days to reply and continue the chat... lost its fluidity.

[lonely57]

6 hours ago, TamPenis said:

The other type of time wasters is the chat response time. You responded to his chat promptly. However, it took him hours or even days to reply and continue the chat... lost its fluidity

hours is ok sometimes ppl are really busy at work. But days is too much. U can never be too busy to not reply. At least after work u can reply. Unless ur an army personnel in the jungle but even then at night before you sleep can reply

[Guest Thinkpls]

11 hours ago, lonely57 said:

 

that happened to me a few times on grindr too. they just stopped talking straight when u send them ur pic. thats why i will never send any other pic. my profile pic is all they are getting.. 

 

That is why you should put clear face pics on your profile just as you want to see those of others before you meet. If you dont, then pls don't talk to those with a face. 

 

If clear face pics are compulsory and checked against ic like the lunch dating app straight ppl use, there will be much more sincerity and near zero time wasting