Gays looking for LTR is like looking for a job candidate...

[JaO]

why does it seem like the people who wants a relationship here are putting their resumes online? it's like finding a job in a company, i am this this this, that that that, i provide this skill, etc. finding love is not finding a job, correct me if i'm wrong. Then there are people that says i am looking for"..." and they list all the conditions, i mean if they are looking for that that's probably why they are still single lol.  This is just, its just wrong, but then again, it's my POV, what are you guys thoughts eh?

[Bily]

"Then there are people that says i am looking for"..." and they list all the conditions, i mean if they are looking for that that's probably why they are still single lol" fkin preach thissss. 

 

I find that as a chub ans I see other chubs be like "Only chaser" it just puts me off .-. And even those normal human :c like firstly , it is an honour to have someone liking you even if they are big in size or something.

[JaO]

2 minutes ago, Bily said:

"Then there are people that says i am looking for"..." and they list all the conditions, i mean if they are looking for that that's probably why they are still single lol" fkin preach thissss. 

 

I find that as a chub ans I see other chubs be like "Only chaser" it just puts me off .-. And even those normal human :c like firstly , it is an honour to have someone liking you even if they are big in size or something.

yeah, the way they  alienate people because of their body sizes are kind of degrading and rude.  whats worse is, people that find and want all that in thier S/O arent even close to the dream guy that they want. hahah its just wrong to me 

[Guest Yeah]

9 minutes ago, JaO said:

why does it seem like the people who wants a relationship here are putting their resumes online? it's like finding a job in a company, i am this this this, that that that, i provide this skill, etc. finding love is not finding a job, correct me if i'm wrong. Then there are people that says i am looking for"..." and they list all the conditions, i mean if they are looking for that that's probably why they are still single lol.  This is just, its just wrong, but then again, it's my POV, what are you guys thoughts eh?

It's kinda what happens when it comes to online dating. Straight people experience this too, though I would agree that gays seem to be more superficial/harsh.

 

I personally don't think online dating is for me, so I don't do it. You have that option too. 

[Steve5380]

Good analogy,  people looking for LTR face the same as those looking for a job.

It is: ... no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, .... no, no, YES.

We should recognize this and don't get discouraged.

[Guest Fact]

Simply because there are guys out there who are unsure of their orientation yet and they’re using this platform to try it out. 

 

If it’s real life, it’s easy because we list our preferences in our mind when we see the other person. If they are suitable, we then make a move. However, we can’t do the same online. The only way to make things efficient is to list our preferences and hopefully find someone suitable. You don’t expect a 20 year old guy wanting to date a 60 year old guy right? 

 

Personally I don’t see a harm in listing our preferences when we make an ad. Afterall it reduces time wastage.

 

Just my pov, cheers.

 

 

 

 

[Kimochi]

11 minutes ago, JaO said:

yeah, the way they  alienate people because of their body sizes are kind of degrading and rude.  whats worse is, people that find and want all that in thier S/O arent even close to the dream guy that they want. hahah its just wrong to me 

Its called preference. Would you mind dating at fat guy who doesn't wash up frequently and talk loudly? Ask yourself what you want, that will be working preference. 

[Steve5380]

Should we object that others "advertise" themselves and pose their preferences?

Today (at least in the US) lawyers can advertise, drug companies can advertise, financial companies can advertise...

It seems that only sex workers cannot advertise because of some outdated moral hangups...

We can always ignore the advertisements, fast-forward over them.

[JaO]

 

 

Edited June 16, 2018 by JaO

[Steve5380]

So what is it that you find "just wrong"?

[Steve5380]

3 minutes ago, JaO said:

 

 

 

Just tell us what YOU are and want to get, and let's see if there are some takers. 

[bigdanbeam]

There are those who keep reposting the same thing once every few days. 

[JaO]

1 minute ago, bigdanbeam said:

There are those who keep reposting the same thing once every few days. 

[Bily]

8 minutes ago, Kimochi said:

Its called preference. Would you mind dating at fat guy who doesn't wash up frequently and talk loudly? Ask yourself what you want, that will be working preference. 

I would mind but the thing is some of them have really over the limit(if that make sense >~<) preference. 

 

For example: Guy A is a chub and not good looking but wants a slim and handsome boyfriend . :c. I know its not a good point but still be realistic.

[Kimochi]

5 minutes ago, Bily said:

I would mind but the thing is some of them have really over the limit(if that make sense >~<) preference. 

 

For example: Guy A is a chub and not good looking but wants a slim and handsome boyfriend . :c. I know its not a good point but still be realistic.

Its easy, skip him. 

[Guest Fact]

6 minutes ago, bigdanbeam said:

There are those who keep reposting the same thing once every few days. 

Simply means they haven’t found the right one yet. Advertisements on TV and social media are on repeat too yea? If reposting an ad on this platform doesn’t harm you,  keep the shade away.

 

Let’s be open and kind to one another. 

[Kimochi]

Just now, Guest Fact said:

Simply means they haven’t found the right one yet. Advertisements on TV and social media are on repeat too yea? If reposting an ad on this platform doesn’t harm you,  keep the shade away.

 

Let’s be open and kind to one another. 

I believe he meant same subject but open another new topic... He am le have posted under LTR segment instead 

[Bily]

18 minutes ago, Kimochi said:

Its easy, skip him. 

It hurts. "No chub" . It is easier said than done tbf.

 

And tbf it could also be their choice of words such as "Strictly no _" . 

Edited June 16, 2018 by Bily

[Kimochi]

6 minutes ago, Bily said:

It hurts. "No chub" . It is easier said than done tbf.

You can choose to ignore, but since it hurts to you it means you care.  So now its either you do something about it or you ignore. 

[Roy2017]

Well said JaO finally people in this blowingwind only join to get blow. It becomes a buying and selling more a less if the term prostitute is correct or totally dont deserve this term at all.

Being a gay is a curse at the end of day is Karma you get what you deserve .What or how you treat others like a dirt in return it goes back to you. 

[LeanMature]

9 hours ago, Bily said:

I would mind but the thing is some of them have really over the limit(if that make sense >~<) preference. 

 

For example: Guy A is a chub and not good looking but wants a slim and handsome boyfriend . :c. I know its not a good point but still be realistic.

 

The thing is, there are many who are unrealistic.  But at least he is honest to admit he is a chub and not good looking.

[LeanMature]

10 hours ago, JaO said:

yeah, the way they  alienate people because of their body sizes are kind of degrading and rude.  whats worse is, people that find and want all that in thier S/O arent even close to the dream guy that they want. hahah its just wrong to me 

 

It may sound degrading to all who are chubs.  But listing down such preference saved a lot of time, both to him and the chub.

[EasleyLim]

But unlike most companies, they don't often post why they would be an attractive company to work at person to date.
 

[Nipoet]

10 hours ago, Bily said:

It hurts. "No chub" . It is easier said than done tbf.

 

And tbf it could also be their choice of words such as "Strictly no _" . 

It hurts because you cared.

Now, why should you care if some random stranger dood online disliked certain attributes that you happen to possess?

Unless you LIKED that person first, and his blatant statement of flat rejection to that attribute of yours caused you grief, since the person you liked may not like you back.

Hence the "Skip Him" suggestion.

My SO isn't the most ideal of types/body shape, nor is he super duperly god-like in appearance. 

But hey, I *know* I will never find another guy who likes/loves me as much as he does. Well, probably never.

And I  *know* I have some/certain attributes that he dislikes too.

Physical attributes will become secondary factors in determining if an LTR will last long sooner or later. 

And those who keep looking for them, probably has no intention of settling down either.

[bigdanbeam]

18 minutes ago, EasleyLim said:

But unlike most companies, they don't often post why they would be an attractive company to work at person to date.
 

 

Because like most companies, only shortlisted candidates would be notified.

 

 

[Guest criteria]

look for

1. face

2. body

3. top or btm

4. financial

5. educational

6. characters

7. interests

 

if either one above fails, change another target and restart

[JaO]

1 hour ago, EasleyLim said:

But unlike most companies, they don't often post why they would be an attractive company to work at person to date.
 

HAHA

[JaO]

5 minutes ago, Guest criteria said:

look for

1. face

2. body

3. top or btm

4. financial

5. educational

6. characters

7. interests

 

if either one above fails, change another target and restart

thats why lotsa ppl still single 

 

[auscent]

Complicated by lesser chance to socialise in person.

[Dorkable]

Too many guys have been through needless chats only to end up discovering that the guys they have been talking to aren't their type....mostly on the physical aspect.

 

Therefore, it has led to the trend of listing the specific range of potentials that they would like to date. In a way, it is upfront and helps filter out unwanted attention, saves both parties time.

 

 

[LeanMature]

2 hours ago, JaO said:

thats why lotsa ppl still single 

 

 

And confirmed single after 50.  Time has very much run out to find a partner.

[barocco80]

2 hours ago, LeanMature said:

 

And confirmed single after 50.  Time has very much run out to find a partner.

 

Well... they said it's better to be alone then with a lousy company... 50 so what!?

[fab]

Singlehood beats wrong relationships.

 

Many ppl get into relationships for wrong reasons eg. Fear of loneliness etc.

[Guest fatty]

1 minute ago, fab said:

Singlehood beats wrong relationships.

 

Many ppl get into relationships for wrong reasons eg. Fear of loneliness etc.

then who is going to look after you when you are old? 

[fab]

Just now, Guest fatty said:

then who is going to look after you when you are old? 

 

I don't think this is a right reason to get into one.

 

What if i m into much older man? 

[LeanMature]

23 minutes ago, barocco80 said:

 

Well... they said it's better to be alone then with a lousy company... 50 so what!?

 

Many who are above 50 may not even have experienced what is a lousy company.    

[Rift]

I think this is indicative of a shift in mindset when it comes to dating. It use to be people posting information about themselves,  their likes, hobbies, interests and let people find them (then make their decision to date). Now people just post information about what criteria they want their potential partners to have and let other people filter themselves out. Im guessing several reasons: laziness, self-centered, sense of  entitlement,. I suppose I agree to the sentiment that so few people are showing other why people should date them". Most are now thinking " you must be X worthy to date me."

[Guest guest]

This is the reason why there are high chance of gays being single than attached, cause there are simply too many requirements and expectation when looking for LTR. Unlike straight people, men and women get attached easily.

[fab]

Unfortunately one can live without a relationship but not without a job.

 

 

[doncoin]

Well, if looking for an LTR is like looking for a job, then I would want references from previous boyfriends, list of skills and experiences etc. 

[Guest Guest]

On 6/16/2018 at 11:53 PM, JaO said:

why does it seem like the people who wants a relationship here are putting their resumes online? it's like finding a job in a company, i am this this this, that that that, i provide this skill, etc. finding love is not finding a job, correct me if i'm wrong. Then there are people that says i am looking for"..." and they list all the conditions, i mean if they are looking for that that's probably why they are still single lol.  This is just, its just wrong, but then again, it's my POV, what are you guys thoughts eh?

I totally agree with TS. I feel that we has forgotten about what is most important and that is LOVE. we should look beyond the outside appearance and seek what is most important which is the inside that counts.

 

Unfortunately in our community, too much emphasis is base on looks. U blame this on the mass media which often potray gays as the stylish one, the well groomed one, the educated one. The problem solver, the fun loving one. 

 

When I 1st met my partner, i was almost turned off by his stylish and modern dressing, his frequent exercise to maintain his trim and fit body. I initially thought he seek my compaionship because of my status and looks. But after a few months, i found out that his inner beauty if more attractive than his outer beauty. 

 

If only more gays were like me, we will be a more loving community that celebrates having a HEART.

[bigdanbeam]

Do companies ever wonder why they arent getting any applicants for the vacancies they throw out?

[Guest Blank]

All these criteria are fake. Once they see a hot handsome guy, even if it's the complete opposite they will say he's still a perfect fit. 

 

They're trying to fish out whatever that's available. The moment I see they want a, b, c, D, e, F, g criteria, I know either they're sky vegetable or self centered beings. Almost all the time, they're the latter. Sky vegetable have too many suitors queuing up to entertain this kind of wasteful advertisement.

[LeanMature]

43 minutes ago, Guest Blank said:

All these criteria are fake. Once they see a hot handsome guy, even if it's the complete opposite they will say he's still a perfect fit. 

 

They're trying to fish out whatever that's available. The moment I see they want a, b, c, D, e, F, g criteria, I know either they're sky vegetable or self centered beings. Almost all the time, they're the latter. Sky vegetable have too many suitors queuing up to entertain this kind of wasteful advertisement.

 

True.  That's criteria overruled most others.  But you may not possess him long term though.   

[Guest lol]

4 hours ago, Guest Blank said:

All these criteria are fake. Once they see a hot handsome guy, even if it's the complete opposite they will say he's still a perfect fit. 

 

They're trying to fish out whatever that's available. The moment I see they want a, b, c, D, e, F, g criteria, I know either they're sky vegetable or self centered beings. Almost all the time, they're the latter. Sky vegetable have too many suitors queuing up to entertain this kind of wasteful advertisement.

HAHA what is sky vegetable???

[fab]

6 hours ago, Guest lol said:

HAHA what is sky vegetable???

 

Alpha male.

[Steve5380]

On 6/17/2018 at 10:01 AM, Guest guest said:

This is the reason why there are high chance of gays being single than attached, cause there are simply too many requirements and expectation when looking for LTR. Unlike straight people, men and women get attached easily.

 

Hmmm... straight people may get attached easier, but this does not mean that the outcomes are better.

Expectations and requirements lose their strength with time.  If feelings of love develop, these trump over the long lists.

[Steve5380]

On 6/17/2018 at 6:08 PM, Guest Guest said:

I

If only more gays were like me, we will be a more loving community that celebrates having a HEART.

 

Maybe with modern technology you could soon be cloned?

[Guest Simon Cowell jr.]

21 hours ago, Guest lol said:

HAHA what is sky vegetable???

 

Sky vegetable = 天菜。

Literal translation.

 

Refined translation below.

天菜 means

 

Heavenly dish, meaning the guy is hot , good looking , sexy, everyone desires to have sex with him, he is hot catch, big in all the right places, hairy in all the right places,  have an unforgetable face. When he speaks no squeeky girly voice, have no bad breath, comes from cultured background too, and most importantly very good in bed and fuck you and you see stars.

[Guest Wait long long]

2 hours ago, Guest Simon Cowell jr. said:

 

Sky vegetable = 天菜。

Literal translation.

 

Refined translation below.

天菜 means

 

Heavenly dish, meaning the guy is hot , good looking , sexy, everyone desires to have sex with him, he is hot catch, big in all the right places, hairy in all the right places,  have an unforgetable face. When he speaks no squeeky girly voice, have no bad breath, comes from cultured background too, and most importantly very good in bed and fuck you and you see stars.

Hahaha this type of guys don’t exist bro. You can continue daydreaming.

 

You’re lucky if you find one guy who’s charming and cute at the same time. And he take cares of you and listen to you talk. 

 

The perfect guy don’t exist. You gotta accept imperfections.