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Struggling 45yo who has nothing


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Guest Struggling 45

I'm struggling 45.

 

Work no promotion. 

House no single. 

Boyfriend no have. 

Fiends all gone. 

10 years left to retirement account. 

Bitcoin investment lost money. 

Lonely. 

Sad. 

Balding. 

Fat. 

Young don't like me. 

Old don't like me. 

Same age have wives and kids. 

Lost in a sea of youth 

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Guest Exercise
On 8/1/2022 at 1:21 PM, Guest Struggling 45 said:

I'm struggling 45.

 

Work no promotion. 

House no single. 

Boyfriend no have. 

Fiends all gone. 

10 years left to retirement account. 

Bitcoin investment lost money. 

Lonely. 

Sad. 

Balding. 

Fat. 

Young don't like me. 

Old don't like me. 

Same age have wives and kids. 

Lost in a sea of youth 

Start exercising, join one of the 2 mens only exercise setups at Tai Seng or Rovell, you can find them in BW

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Guest Why need gay workout

Eee. All this gay workout group allwanna hookup one. 

 

Last time I join gay dragon boat. They just wanna sleep with me. I stopped going. 

 

I rather workout with straight people honestly 

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  • G_M changed the title to Struggling 45yo who has nothing
On 8/1/2022 at 1:21 PM, Guest Struggling 45 said:

I'm struggling 45.

 

Work no promotion. 

House no single. 

Boyfriend no have. 

Fiends all gone. 

10 years left to retirement account. 

Bitcoin investment lost money. 

Lonely. 

Sad. 

Balding. 

Fat. 

Young don't like me. 

Old don't like me. 

Same age have wives and kids. 

Lost in a sea of youth 

You still have a breath, a dick and a pair of hands which should give you maximum pleasure.

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On 8/1/2022 at 1:21 PM, Guest Struggling 45 said:

I'm struggling 45.

 

Work no promotion. 

House no single. 

Boyfriend no have. 

Fiends all gone. 

10 years left to retirement account. 

Bitcoin investment lost money. 

Lonely. 

Sad. 

Balding. 

Fat. 

Young don't like me. 

Old don't like me. 

Same age have wives and kids. 

Lost in a sea of youth 

 

Regarding friends go on some not so much on sex searching gay apps and post a profile , make clear you want friends and not fun.

Nobody needs to be lonely.

 

Regarding the "fat" enough has been said. you can start some sports and slimming, nobody needs to be fat.

 

There should be also "same aged gays" why do you want to focus on straights with kids?

 

There are also some green initiatives of groups that you can join and find friends at other areas.

 

Work wise there is always a stop somewhere where no further promotion is possible. Otherwise if you feel you can be promoted but aren't search for a new job.

 

Most important of all is to overcome your toxic negativity.

Look at the things you have achieved and move on with a more optimistic approach.

While being on this negativity phase, surely nobody wants to stick around with you.

People want to be happy and not listen to all your complaints and your negative way of thinking about life.

 

Sitting frustrated at home is the least thing that gives you any improvement.

Therefore, move you ass.

 

 

 

 

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On 8/1/2022 at 1:21 PM, Guest Struggling 45 said:

I'm struggling 45.

 

Work no promotion. 

House no single. 

Boyfriend no have. 

Fiends all gone. 

10 years left to retirement account. 

Bitcoin investment lost money. 

Lonely. 

Sad. 

Balding. 

Fat. 

Young don't like me. 

Old don't like me. 

Same age have wives and kids. 

Lost in a sea of youth 

Maybe do food delivery on a bicycle during your off days. You get to earn while you exercise.

Hmmm consume Propecia + apply Minoxidil for your hair(?)

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Guest Susan
On 8/1/2022 at 1:21 PM, Guest Struggling 45 said:

I'm struggling 45.

 

Work no promotion. 

House no single. 

Boyfriend no have. 

Fiends all gone. 

10 years left to retirement account. 

Bitcoin investment lost money. 

Lonely. 

Sad. 

Balding. 

Fat. 

Young don't like me. 

Old don't like me. 

Same age have wives and kids. 

Lost in a sea of youth 

Are u sure u r 45 or 25 ?? 

 

I'm struggling 45.

 

Work no promotion. - U have a choice , get another job 

House no single.  - dont understand this , can afford buy cannot continue w where u r now 

Boyfriend no have.  - this one u managed yourself ! 

Fiends all gone.  - U so insecure need so many friends or if they are avoiding u , go reflect 

10 years left to retirement account.  - As if u r alone 

Bitcoin investment lost money. - Got investment sure win one meh ?? have lah , go top up your CPF lor 

Lonely.  MANAGED YOURSELF 

Sad.  MANAGED YOURSELF 

Balding. MANAGED YOURSELF 

Fat. MANAGED YOURSELF 

Young don't like me.  MANAGED YOURSELF 

Old don't like me.  MANAGED YOURSELF 

Same age have wives and kids.  IT IS none of your biz 

Lost in a sea of youth  - this one wuliao one  

Hence u mentality is like 25.  If I am your friend I also siam u , hangout with you , SIAN !  so negative 

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Guest Guest

Reading some of the responses here, methinks bitchiness is even more toxic.

 

To the OG poster: A simple mindset change (of seeing what you have vs what you don't) is a constructive step out of your depression. Write down 3 things you're grateful for. Every day.

 

And start doing 3 simple, positive things every day that improves your Environment, Health & Fitness. e.g:

 

- making your bed;

- having some healthy food (fruits/vitamins);

- going for a walk/stretch;

 

Then start doing more to improve your Environment, Health & Fitness., e.g:

 

- spring clean/decorate;

- cook;

- run/swim/cycle;

 

Hope you feel better soon.

 

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Guest Mature to Mature

This may be a cry for help. 

 

It is good that you are aware of the situation. Hope you can take control and do something about it to improve on the situation. 

 

As we know, expect all kinds of judgemental criticism when posting on Blowing Wind (BW). Both the good and the bad. Don't take it to heart. Treat it as blowing wind. 

 

In times like this we seek compassion and understanding. And not to push someone off the edge. 

 

BW may not be the best platform to hear and give advice on your grievances/what you're going through during this phase in your life.

 

Suggest to contact professional counselling or if you need someone to talk to/seek help:

 

https://oogachaga.com/contact

 

Samaritans of Singapore Hotline: 1800 221 4444

 

Wishing you well. Take Care. 

 

 

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Guest Coffee Pods
On 8/1/2022 at 8:41 PM, Guest Mature to Mature said:

Mental Health is always ignore in SG due to stigma in our society. Please do seek help if need asap before it turns too nasty .

 

This may be a cry for help.

 

It is good that you are aware of the situation. Hope you can take control and do something about it to improve on the situation. 

 

As we know, expect all kinds of judgemental criticism when posting on Blowing Wind (BW). Both the good and the bad. Don't take it to heart. Treat it as blowing wind. 

 

In times like this we seek compassion and understanding. And not to push someone off the edge. 

 

BW may not be the best platform to hear and give advice on your grievances/what you're going through during this phase in your life.

 

Suggest to contact professional counselling or if you need someone to talk to/seek help:

 

https://oogachaga.com/contact

 

Samaritans of Singapore Hotline: 1800 221 4444

 

Wishing you well. Take Care. 

 

 

 

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On 8/1/2022 at 12:21 AM, Guest Struggling 45 said:

I'm struggling 45.

 

Work no promotion. 

House no single. 

Boyfriend no have. 

Fiends all gone. 

10 years left to retirement account. 

Bitcoin investment lost money. 

Lonely. 

Sad. 

Balding. 

Fat. 

Young don't like me. 

Old don't like me. 

Same age have wives and kids. 

Lost in a sea of youth 

 

Recognize that you are in a stable position that poses no threat to your existence, and you can sustain it for some longer time.

Start working on yourself.   ->  meditate giving thanks for what you have,  improve nutrition, exercise, avoid stress, sleep well.

Start loving you and making you the best friend of yourself.

Realize the benefits and take advantage of not having bf nor other friends,  therefore have more time for your projects.

Identify and cultivate the feeling of happiness.  This feeling does not need any justification, but just be.

While meditating or at other times give yourself a good brain washing and build up your self-esteem.  No justification needed.

Cultivate your sociability by bringing out good feelings for others, just in your brain, without need to exteriorize them.

 

All this you can do even if you are isolated in a desert island.  You are CHANGING YOURSELF,  and you can do it without a shrink.  You have infinite material on the Internet, YouTube, good guides for Self Help and also plenty of entertainment for a solitary person. You will know when you are ready to bring to society your new YOU.

 

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Guest Try and see
On 8/1/2022 at 1:21 PM, Guest Struggling 45 said:

I'm struggling 45.

 

Work no promotion. 

House no single. 

Boyfriend no have. 

Fiends all gone. 

10 years left to retirement account. 

Bitcoin investment lost money. 

Lonely. 

Sad. 

Balding. 

Fat. 

Young don't like me. 

Old don't like me. 

Same age have wives and kids. 

Lost in a sea of youth 

 

You have a job and you are not handicapped; that is already better than a lot of people.

A lot of your other complaints are mental states that you can overcome by changing your mentality, as others have mentioned. 

 

No boyfriend and friends? Think of how much money you can save! No need to buy them birthday presents; no need to occasionally treat them to dinner, etc.

Also, having many friends may be fun for a teenager, but it can be exhausting for a guy in his 40s.

 

So don't waste your life whining.

Be grateful for what you have. Work hard now so that you can enjoy your coming retirement. If your weight bothers you, start to incorporate exercise into your routine.

No need to join any gym. Just adjust your diet and do brisk walking regularly.

 

d8efe86fa52145d08602618667f7c438.jpg

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On 8/1/2022 at 1:21 AM, Guest Struggling 45 said:

I'm struggling 45.

 

Work no promotion. 

House no single. 

Boyfriend no have. 

Fiends all gone. 

10 years left to retirement account. 

Bitcoin investment lost money. 

Lonely. 

Sad. 

Balding. 

Fat. 

Young don't like me. 

Old don't like me. 

Same age have wives and kids. 

Lost in a sea of youth 

 

 

It is easy to feel overwhelmed by life and its constant struggles regardless of age, relationship status, social life, financial circumstances, etc. It is ok to have a moment of self-pity but once you are done self-pitying, start an action plan on how you can turn your life around cause self-pity is not going to change your reality. 

 

Many things in life are out of your control, but there are also a number of things that are within your control. Your appearance is one of the things you are in control of. As many who responded to your post shared, you can start exercising to deal with your weight issue. There are options for balding as well. You can shave off your hair, and embrace the bald look or go to a dermatologist for solutions. Getting old is an inevitable reality but you can do what you can to slow down its effects. Just do it with the right frame of mind.

 

Career-wise, have a talk with your boss or supervisor on what you can do to get to the next level. If you stay silent, you will never know. So initiate the conversation. Invite them out to coffee or lunch and discuss. Staying silent won't help you. 

 

With regards to finding a relationship, start with having a relationship with yourself first. You can be alone, but not lonely. There is a difference. One thing I have learned over the years is that happiness has to come from within yourself. Not from other people, or wealth or anything. You need to recognize that you are enough and be content with it. Once you get there, it is an inner peace and confidence that nobody can ever take away from you. 

 

Like i've mentioned in the beginning. It is ok to have a moment of self-pity and cry if you want to. It is what you choose after that moment of self-pity that will make a difference in your life. You can take action to transform your life, or sit there, do nothing till the next wave of self-pity hits you. 

 

 

 

Love. 

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On 8/1/2022 at 1:21 PM, Guest Struggling 45 said:

I'm struggling 45.

 

On 8/1/2022 at 1:21 PM, Guest Struggling 45 said:

 

Work no promotion.  - you have to find what motivates you, is it money, is it self fulfillment.....dont work for the sake of working, find your passion.

House no single. - you need to start some where, still living with parents, move out, make a decision to dial back on keeping up with the jones.

Boyfriend no have. - do you think its a blessing to have a boyfriend....being single allows you freedom to do what you want.

Fiends all gone. - like other people commented, join support groups, join a gym, make friends.

10 years left to retirement account. - In Singapore, Singaporeans have no real money, all the money belongs to the government.

Bitcoin investment lost money. - there is no easy way to building a nest egg, its all hard work.

Lonely. - have confidence in being alone, develop hobbies, spend time alone.

Sad.  - as above

Balding. - we all loose hair, find a solution to it

Fat. - loose weight, start a plan, eat in moderation. Health is paramount nowadays.

Young don't like me. - Self love - when you take care of your body, you will take care of your inside which will show outwardly.

Old don't like me. - as above

Same age have wives and kids. - comparison is the route of all evil.

Lost in a sea of youth - I am 50 next year, doesnt bother me, look at all the sexy daddies, I am also one of them.

 

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Always count our blessings. Got job no promotion it's ok. No family but can afford food to eat it's ok. Bald n fat but still healthy n alive,its ok.

Always think of the worst scenario of others ,u will feel blessed n happy. Take care n enjoy life to the fullest.

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At 45 you should really have come to terms with nothing in life is ever easy. It shouldn't have taken that long for that realisation.

If life is smooth sailing, what's the point of living it in the first place? Even people you admire or aspire to be are fraught with challenges in their lives, you just don't see the issues they face, because people typically would not air their dirty laundry out in the open. They will only choose to project their wins and not losses. Look at all the influencers and their perfect instagrammable lives, easily enviable, but there's so much that you don't really know about them behind those heavily filtered and orchestrated images. 

So, the only thing you really need to do is first gain a healthy perspective of your situation and adopt a willingness to change and work on what you need to change for yourself. Nothing comes without hard work and perseverance. Money won't grow from trees, Muscles won't bulge from chilling in bed and Men won't fall on your lap just because you want them to. 

Excuses limits you. Laziness impedes progress. And the inability to be positive in mindset and in your actions will get you no where you want to be. 

So, make the change. Start today. You've already waited so long, your laurels are well rested. Enough is enough.

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Guest Melvin
On 8/2/2022 at 10:59 AM, Since u r here said:

it is quite daring to put investmt in Cryptos if u r not really ready for their price movement
It can wipe out all your 45yo savings!

 

& why "Older 1s don't like you?

Same age have wives and kids. "

U believed his story ah , hence u ask why and give advice 

If someone is in such "jia-luck" situation, still got mood to come post here and details his situation one by one numbering ! 

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By 45, u should have learnt not to compare with others but yourself. Everyone is struggling with their own set of problem. 

 

It bring back one perception: "is the glass half empty or half full?"

half-empty-1.jpg

Edited by lonelyglobe
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On 8/2/2022 at 11:36 AM, Guest Melvin said:

U believed his story ah , hence u ask why and give advice 

If someone is in such "jia-luck" situation, still got mood to come post here and details his situation one by one numbering ! 

melvin, he said he has no friends to go too

 

jialat or jiaLuck (alot of luck)

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Guest Porpoises agent
On 8/1/2022 at 10:01 PM, Guest Try and see said:

 

You have a job and you are not handicapped; that is already better than a lot of people.

A lot of your other complaints are mental states that you can overcome by changing your mentality, as others have mentioned. 

 

No boyfriend and friends? Think of how much money you can save! No need to buy them birthday presents; no need to occasionally treat them to dinner, etc.

Also, having many friends may be fun for a teenager, but it can be exhausting for a guy in his 40s.

 

So don't waste your life whining.

Be grateful for what you have. Work hard now so that you can enjoy your coming retirement. If your weight bothers you, start to incorporate exercise into your routine.

No need to join any gym. Just adjust your diet and do brisk walking regularly.

 

d8efe86fa52145d08602618667f7c438.jpg


Perspective is everything! 
 

A lot of times, our worries are founded on what society expects us to be at different age of our lives. It is scary. 
 

The scariest part is what the future holds for the younger generation and the babies yet to be born in Singapore. 
 

Two worrying numbers stand out. 1) Prices of HDB and property in general and 2) CPF minimum sum. When we have BTO and resale flats going for $600+k and $1million+ now in 2022, what would it be like in 2032 or 2042? Likewise for CPF. 
 

What is compounding the situation is the phenomenon FOMO (fear of missing out). People are buying property and pushing the prices to unreal and unsustainable levels, to the detriment of the younger generations and babies yet to be born. Look no further at the situation in Hong Kong. We are on our way there. 

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Guest William
On 8/14/2022 at 3:06 PM, TEY2005 said:

I try to exercise and slim down. Just splurge yesterday at car expo to get a 2nd hand bmw3 to make myself feel happier. Going sauna now to chill and relax. 
find stuff to do to make u happy ok? 

How lian must tell ppl you bought BMW yday 

 

 

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On 8/1/2022 at 1:21 PM, Guest Struggling 45 said:

I'm struggling 45.

 

Work no promotion. 

House no single. 

Boyfriend no have. 

Fiends all gone. 

10 years left to retirement account. 

Bitcoin investment lost money. 

Lonely. 

Sad. 

Balding. 

Fat. 

Young don't like me. 

Old don't like me. 

Same age have wives and kids. 

Lost in a sea of youth 

 

What is house no single? 

 

What r u doing to overcome the above? 

 

As long as u have income coming in, most of the above are good to have but not must have.

鍾意就好,理佢男定女

 

never argue with the guests. let them bark all they want.

 

结缘不结

不解缘

 

After I have said what I wanna say, I don't care what you say.

 

看穿不说穿

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On 8/1/2022 at 1:21 PM, Guest Struggling 45 said:

I'm struggling 45.

 

Work no promotion. 

House no single. 

Boyfriend no have. 

Fiends all gone. 

10 years left to retirement account. 

Bitcoin investment lost money. 

Lonely. 

Sad. 

Balding. 

Fat. 

Young don't like me. 

Old don't like me. 

Same age have wives and kids. 

Lost in a sea of youth 

2 weeks since your post... I hope you are feeling better and less persimistic.

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Guest Guest
On 8/1/2022 at 1:21 PM, Guest Struggling 45 said:

I'm struggling 45.

 

Work no promotion. 

House no single. 

Boyfriend no have. 

Fiends all gone. 

10 years left to retirement account. 

Bitcoin investment lost money. 

Lonely. 

Sad. 

Balding. 

Fat. 

Young don't like me. 

Old don't like me. 

Same age have wives and kids. 

Lost in a sea of youth 

 

Who did you vote for to result in such a state for yourself now? 

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Guest Try and see

To add, no promotion is not always a bad thing.

 

Promotion usually means more workload, more responsibilities, more work to bring home, more worries, more stress, more meetings to attend, more arrows, etc.

 

Sometimes, no promotion is okay.

Can sleep better at night.

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Guest Guest

 

On 8/14/2022 at 6:17 PM, Guest Try and see said:

To add, no promotion is not always a bad thing.

 

Promotion usually means more workload, more responsibilities, more work to bring home, more worries, more stress, more meetings to attend, more arrows, etc.

 

Sometimes, no promotion is okay.

Can sleep better at night.

 

 

You really want him to hentak kaki cepat hentak for the rest of his life while his CECA masters goes buy big mansions in their motherland, while he stays in a rented pigeonhole in Singapore? Wow ... your Cruel Intentions ..... 

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