worldangel Posted January 31, 2020 Report Share Posted January 31, 2020 Joke: Steadfast In My Beliefs A trusted aid was counselling the senator, "Some of your constituents are beginning to disagree with you." The senator replied, "Keep tabs on them. When enough disagree with me to constitute a reliable majority, I'll turn around and agree with them." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted January 31, 2020 Report Share Posted January 31, 2020 Joke: Power of Advertising During a recent session of family-court, the wife was asked, "Why did you throw the pot of geraniums at your husband?" "Because of the advertising, your honour." "What advertising?" "Say it with flowers." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted January 31, 2020 Report Share Posted January 31, 2020 Joke: Love At First Sight The soldier asked for a furlough so that he might get married. "How long have you known this girl," the sergeant asked. "A week." "Why, my lad, that's not long enough. I suggest you wait a couple of months, and then, if you still want to get married, I will approve the furlough." Two months later the soldier was back, reminding the sergeant of his promise. "So you still want to get married? I didn't think that a young man would stay interested in the same girl for a couple of months." "I know, sir. But this isn't the same girl." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted January 31, 2020 Report Share Posted January 31, 2020 Joke: Big Game Hunting A big game hunter goes on safari with his wife and his mother-in-law. One morning, the wife wakes up to find her mother gone. Immediately, she awakens up her husband and they both set off to find the older woman. Suddenly, they break into a clearing and there's the mother-in-law, standing face-to-face with a ferocious lion! "Quick, darling," the wife shouts frantically, "Do something!" "Oh, no," the husband says, "That lion got himself into this mess. Let him get himself out!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted January 31, 2020 Report Share Posted January 31, 2020 Joke: If He Can Screw One night, an 87-year-old woman came home from bingo to find her 92-year-old husband in bed with another woman. She became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th-floor apartment, killing him instantly. Brought before the court on the charge of murder, she was asked if she had anything to say in her own defence. "Your Honour," she began coolly, "I figured that at 92, if he could screw, he could fly!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 1, 2020 Report Share Posted February 1, 2020 Joke: Just Admit It Already A little boy just would not learn. One day his history teacher asked him who signed the Declaration of Independence. He didn't know. For almost a week she never stopped asking him the same question, but still he couldn't come up with the right answer. Finally, in desperation, the teacher called the boy's father and complained. "Your boy won't tell me who signed the Declaration of Independence.” he father call his son and said, "Come here, son, and sit down. Now, if you signed that goddamn thing, just admit it so we can get out of here!!!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 1, 2020 Report Share Posted February 1, 2020 Joke: Did You Pose for That? A man sees a picture of his wife in the nude hanging at an art show and demands of her, "Did you really pose for that?" "Don’t be ridiculous," she replies. "Of course not. The artist painted it from memory. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 1, 2020 Report Share Posted February 1, 2020 Joke: Cost of Lawyer Pickpocket (visiting friend in jail): "I hired a lawyer for you this morning, Slim, but I had to hand him my Rolex as a retainer." Slim: "Did he keep it?" Pickpocket: "He thinks he did." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 1, 2020 Report Share Posted February 1, 2020 Joke: Good Deed for Wife Deciding to give his wife a pleasant surprise, the husband took home some flowers and a box of candy. "Hazel, you look tired," he said to his wife. "Slip on your best outfit and let’s go out to eat." Hazel bursts into tears. "It was bad enough to have the baby fall down the back steps and burn my hand in the kitchen," she sobbed, "but to have you come home intoxicated is just too much!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 1, 2020 Report Share Posted February 1, 2020 Joke: The First Airplane Trip It was the man’s first trip by airplane. He was frightened and nervous. As the engines began to roar, he gripped the arms of his seat, closed his eyes, and counted to one hundred. When he opened his eyes he looked out of the windows. “See those tiny people down there,” he said to the woman sitting next to him, “don’t they look like ants?” “They are ants,” the woman said. “We haven’t left the ground yet.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 2, 2020 Report Share Posted February 2, 2020 Joke: Send Her the Bottom Half A man living in a nudist camp gets a letter from his mother requesting that he send her a photo of himself. Unfortunately, the only pictures he has are ones in which he is wearing no clothes. So he cuts a snapshot in half, and then sends the photo showing him from the waist up to his mother. His mother is so pleased with the picture that she asks him to send one to his grandmother. The man thinks to himself, “Grandma’s eyesight is so bad these days; I’ll send her the bottom half.” A week later he receives a letter from his grandmother. In the letter she writes, “I liked your picture, but your new hairstyle makes your nose look too long.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 2, 2020 Report Share Posted February 2, 2020 Joke: Watching Star Wars I was watching Star Wars with my daughter. She asked why Luke was climbing inside a Tauntaun. I said to keep warm. She asked, "How warm is it inside?" I said, "Lukewarm." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 2, 2020 Report Share Posted February 2, 2020 Joke: The Accountant’s Sleep Problem An accountant got out of bed one morning and complained that he had not slept a wink. “Why didn’t you count sheep?” his wife asked. “I did, and that’s what got me into trouble,” the accountant replied. “I made a mistake the first hour, and it took until this morning to correct it.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 2, 2020 Report Share Posted February 2, 2020 Joke: Patience Is A Virtue A man was observing a woman in the grocery store with a three-year old girl in her basket. As they passed the cookie section, the little girl asked for cookies and her mother told her, "No." The little girl immediately began to whine and fuss, and the mother said quietly, "Now Monica, we just have half of the aisles left to go through - don't be upset. It won't be long now." Soon, they came to the candy aisle and the little girl began to shout for candy. When told she couldn't have any, she began to cry. The mother said, "There, there, Monica, don't cry - only two more aisles to go and then we'll be checking out." When they got to the checkout stand, the little girl immediately began to clamour for gum and burst into a terrible tantrum upon discovering there'd be no gum purchased. The mother said serenely, "Monica, we'll be through this check-out stand in 5 minutes and then you can go home and have a nice nap." The man followed them out to the parking lot and stopped the woman to compliment her. "I couldn't help noticing how patient you were with little Monica," he began. The mother replied, "I'm Monica - my little girl's name is Tammy." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 2, 2020 Report Share Posted February 2, 2020 Joke: Mailing Christmas Cards I wondered if I could get my husband to help me address Christmas cards, as I had so much to do. I arranged everything we needed, then hopefully pulled up a chair and said, "Come on, Dear, let's get these out of the way." He glanced at the array on the table, turned away and went into the den, only to return moments later with a high stack of cards, stamped, sealed, and addressed. "They're last year's," he said. "I forgot to mail them. Now let's go out to dinner and relax." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 3, 2020 Report Share Posted February 3, 2020 Joke: How the Wind Blows The tourist, after stepping off the train in Kansas City and desperately holding on to his hat, "Wow, does the wind always blow this way out here?" "Nah," said the driver solemnly, "it blows this way for six months of the year, and then it turns round and blows the other direction." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 3, 2020 Report Share Posted February 3, 2020 Joke: Most Suspicious Woman in the World “My wife is the most suspicious woman in the world,” complained the stressed husband to a sympathetic friend. “If I come home early, she thinks I’m after something. And if I come home late, she thinks I’ve already had it.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 3, 2020 Report Share Posted February 3, 2020 Joke: When the Rooster Stops Chasing A farmer was munching on a cookie as he watches the rooster chase a hen around. Playfully, the farmer threw a piece of cookie to the ground. Seeing it, the rooster stopped chasing the hen and ran to the piece of cookie. The farmer shook his head slowly and said, “Gosh, I hope I never get that hungry Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 3, 2020 Report Share Posted February 3, 2020 Joke: Spider With No Legs A blonde decides to make an experiment. She gets a spider, and pulls off two legs and tells it to walk. It walks a few steps, so she removes another two legs and asks it to walk. It walks a few more steps, so she yanks off another two legs and tells it to walk. It walks, so she removes the last two legs and tells it to walk. Nothing happens, so she asks it again to walk. It doesn't move so she comes up with a conclusion. She concludes that spiders with no legs are deaf. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 3, 2020 Report Share Posted February 3, 2020 Joke: A man was looking to hire a driver ... A man was looking to hire a driver for a bus tour business. Three men applied for the job. He calls one into his office to interview him. The man says that he can put the wheels right on the edge of a bridge, drive, and not fall off. The employer is very impressed. He calls another man in. This man says that he can put the wheels halfway off of a bridge, drive, and not fall off. The employer is again very impressed. He calls the last man in. He says, "I heard what the other two guys said, and I don't think I could match them. I usually drive in the middle of a bridge." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 4, 2020 Report Share Posted February 4, 2020 Joke: Solving Drought Issues Farmer: "I've arranged my garden so as not to be caught by droughts this summing." Neighbour: "What did you do?" Farmer: "I planted my potatoes and onions in alternate rows. The onions will make the potatoes eyes water and reduce the need for water." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 4, 2020 Report Share Posted February 4, 2020 Joke: Water and Milk Milkman (to new hand): "Did you put water in the milk this morning?" New hand: "Yes sir." Milkman: "Don't you know this is wicked?" "But you told me to mix water with the milk?" "Yes, but I told you to put the water in first and then pour the milk into it. Then, you see, we can tell the people we never put water in our milk." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 4, 2020 Report Share Posted February 4, 2020 Joke: Cook Book Instructions Two old settlers out in the FAR WEST, confirmed bachelors, got to talking about cooking. "I got one of them cookery books once, but I could do nothing with it." "Too much fancy work in it, eh?" "You said it! Every one o'them recipes began the same way... 'Take out a clean dish'... that settled me." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 4, 2020 Report Share Posted February 4, 2020 Joke: Balancing the Account In the days before calculators, accountants were frequently unable to get their debits to balance with their credits. So, in order to overcome the discrepancy, they often created a bogus account titled "Taste" to store the unbalanced amount and allow the books to balance. Unfortunately, the government soon heard of this practice and declared a new law... there would, from this point on, be no accounting for Taste. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 4, 2020 Report Share Posted February 4, 2020 Joke: The Fourth Time Is A Charm Two colleagues opened an office in a small town and put a sign reading 'Dr. Smith and Dr. Stein, Psychiatry and G2Proctology'. The town council was not pleased with the sign so the doctors changed it to read 'Minds and Behinds'. This was not acceptable either, so they tried again with 'Schizoids and Hemorrhoids'. Not accepted. After a third try of 'Catatonics and High Colonic' was not accepted and they were near wits end, the doctors made one final proposal, which to their eternal relief, the council accepted... 'Dr. Smith and Dr. Stein, Odds and Ends'. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 5, 2020 Report Share Posted February 5, 2020 Joke: Special Locket Seeing her friend Marcia wearing a new locket, Ashley asks if there is a memento of some sort inside. “Yes,” says Marcia, “a lock of my husband’s hair.” “But Larry’s still alive?” “I know, but his hair is gone.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 5, 2020 Report Share Posted February 5, 2020 Joke: Hairy Underarms A woman with really hairy underarms boards a crowded bus. Unable to find a seat, she settles for hanging onto one of the poles. A drunken man next to her stares for a few minutes, and then he says, “I love a woman that does aerobics.” The woman replies angrily, “I do not do aerobics!” The man then looks at the woman and says, “Then how did you get your leg up so high?” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 5, 2020 Report Share Posted February 5, 2020 Joke: 3 Little boys Three little boys sitting on a porch. The first little boy says, "What would you do with a million dollars?" The second boy said, "I'd buy that blue Cadillac over there." The third little boy said, "I'd buy the pink Cadillac sitting over there." Then the third little boy asked the first what he'd do with the money. The first boy replied, "I'd cover myself in hair." The other two asked "why?" and he said because my sister has a (2" x 2") patch of hair and she owns both those Cadillacs! Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 5, 2020 Report Share Posted February 5, 2020 Joke: Which broker... After reading the morning headlines about the recent stock market downturn, a high-powered executive trying to impress a client in his office, flipped on his intercom switch and barked to his secretary, "Miss Hunter, get my broker!" The client was impressed until he heard the secretary's clear voice saying, "Yes, Sir, stock or pawn?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 5, 2020 Report Share Posted February 5, 2020 Joke: A man phones home from his office ... A man phones home from his office and says to his wife, "I have the chance to go fishing for a week. It's the opportunity of a lifetime. I have to leave right away. Pack my clothes, my fishing equipment, and my blue silk pajamas. I'll be home in an hour to pick them up." The man rushes home to grab everything. He hugs his wife, apologizes for the short notice, and then hurries off. A week later, the man returns and his wife asks, "Did you have a good trip, dear?" The man replies, "Yep, the fishing was great...but you forgot to pack my blue silk pajamas." His wife smiles and says, "Oh, no I didn't...I put them in your tackle box. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 6, 2020 Report Share Posted February 6, 2020 Joke: Awful Toothache Willie: "I have an awful toothache." Tommie: "I'd have it taken out if it was mine." Willie: "If it was yours, I would have punched it out." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 6, 2020 Report Share Posted February 6, 2020 Joke: Spit It Out A teacher thought it would be nice to let her class guess some jellybeans flavours. So, the next day she brought some jellybeans and the kids got most of the answers correct. "This next one is going to be a little more difficult. Here's a clue, it's what your Mom calls your Dad.” Right away a little boy named Tony spits it out and shouts, "Spit it out, it's an asshole!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 6, 2020 Report Share Posted February 6, 2020 Joke: Getting Married Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends… You order what you want, and when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 6, 2020 Report Share Posted February 6, 2020 Joke: Boobs of A Twenty Year Old A 50-year old woman goes to the gynaecologist for her annual appointment. Returning home she was so happy, that her husband asked, “What are you so happy about?” She replied, "I am so happy the doctor said I have the tits of a twenty year old!" The husband says, "Oh yeah, what did he say about your 50-year-old ass?" She happily replied, “He didn't even ask about you.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 7, 2020 Report Share Posted February 7, 2020 Joke: A married couple were asleep when ... A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning, the wife (undoubtedly blonde), picked up the phone, listened a moment and said, "How should I know, that's 200 miles from here?" and hung up. The husband said, "Who was that?" The wife said, "I don't know, some young woman wanting to know 'if the coast is clear." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 7, 2020 Report Share Posted February 7, 2020 Joke: A blonde, worried about the HIV... A blonde, worried about the HIV crisis, walks into a drugstore and purchases a pack of condoms. "That will be $1.08, please," says the clerk. "What's the 8 cents for?" asks the blonde. "It says one dollar right here on the packaging." "Tax," replies the clerk. "Gee," says the blonde, "I thought you just rolled them on and they stayed put." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 7, 2020 Report Share Posted February 7, 2020 Joke: Bill was showing Joe the family.. Bill was showing Joe the family album, and came across a picture of himself and his wife on their wedding day. “Was that the day Mommy came to work for us?” Joe asked. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 7, 2020 Report Share Posted February 7, 2020 Joke: Family encouragement Mary was having a tough day and had stretched herself out on the couch to do a bit of what she thought to be well-deserved complaining and self- pitying. She moaned to her mom and brother, “Nobody loves me … the whole world hates me!” Her brother, busily occupied playing a game, hardly looked up at her and passed on this encouraging word: “That's not true, Mary. Some people don't even know you.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 7, 2020 Report Share Posted February 7, 2020 Joke: A police recruit was asked during ... A police recruit was asked during the exam, "What would you do if you had to arrest your own mother?" He said: "Call for backup." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 7, 2020 Report Share Posted February 7, 2020 Joke: The waiter... A waiter brings the customer the steak he ordered with his thumb over the meat. "Are you crazy?" yelled the customer, "with your hand on my steak?" "What" answers the waiter, "You want it to fall on the floor again?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 8, 2020 Report Share Posted February 8, 2020 Joke: A couple had been debating the... A couple had been debating the purchase of a new auto for weeks. He wanted a new truck. She wanted a fast little sports-like car so she could zip through traffic around town. He would probably have settled on any beat up old truck, but everything she seemed to like was way out of their price range. "Look!" she said. I want something that goes from 0 to 200 in 4 seconds or less. "And my birthday is coming up. You could surprise me." So he thought and thought then... For her birthday, he bought her a brand new bathroom scale. Services will be at Downing funeral home on Monday, due to the condition of the body, this will be a closed casket service. Please send your donations to the 'Think before you say things to your wife foundation', Dallas, Texas. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 8, 2020 Report Share Posted February 8, 2020 Joke: I Won! A blonde walked in a diner and orders a cup of coffee. When she gets her drink, she notices that it has a "contest game piece" on the side of the cup. She peels off the sticker and instantly starts screaming, "I won a motor home!" She continues shoulting, "I won a motor home!" until the waitress decides to get her boss. "What's the problem here?" the manager asks. "I won a motor home!" she shouts again. "That's impossible!" he replies. "We didn't give out motor homes." She says "Well, it says so on this sticker." The boss takes the sticker and reads it. It says: "Win a bagel." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 8, 2020 Report Share Posted February 8, 2020 Joke: Tour Bus Driver A tour bus driver is driving with a bus full of old aged pensioners when he is tapped on his shoulder by a little old lady. She offers him a handful of peanuts, which he gratefully munches up. After about 15 minutes, she taps him on the shoulder again and she hands the driver another handful of peanuts. When she is about to hand him another batch again, he asks her "Why don't you eat the peanuts?" "We can't chew them because we have no teeth", she replied. "We just love the chocolate around them." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 8, 2020 Report Share Posted February 8, 2020 Joke: Shopping cart ad My father is a skilled CPA, but is not great at self-promotion. So when an advertising company offered to put my father's business placard in the shopping carts of a supermarket, my dad jumped at the chance. Fully a year went by before we got a call that could be traced to those placards. “Richard Larson, CPA?” the caller asked. “That's right,” my father answered. “May I help you?” “Yes,” the voice said. “One of your shopping carts is in my yard and I want you to come and get it.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 8, 2020 Report Share Posted February 8, 2020 Joke: Password A female secretary was helping her new boss set up his computer and asked him what word he would like to use as a password to log in with. Wanting to embarrass his new secretary a bit and let her know where they stood, he smugly told her to enter 'penis.' Without blinking or saying a word, she entered the password. She then almost died laughing at the computer's response: PASSWORD REJECTED. NOT LONG ENOUGH! Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 9, 2020 Report Share Posted February 9, 2020 Joke: Please stand up.... One day a college professor of Psychology was greeting his new college class. He stood up in front of the class and said, "Would everyone who thinks he or she is stupid please stand up?" After a minute or so of silence, a young man stood up. "Well, good morning. So, you actually think you're a moron?" the professor asked. The kid replied, "No sir, I just didn't want to see you standing there all by yourself." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 9, 2020 Report Share Posted February 9, 2020 Joke: How You Earned It A young man asked an old rich man how he made his money. The old guy fingered his worsted wool vest and said, "Well, son, it was 1932. The depth of the Great Depression. I was down to my last nickel." "I invested that nickel in an apple. I spent the entire day polishing the apple and, at the end of the day, I sold the apple for ten cents." "The next morning, I invested those ten cents in two apples. I spent the entire day polishing them and sold them at 5:00 pm for 20 cents. I continued this system for a month, by the end of which I'd accumulated a fortune of $1.37." "Then my wife's father died and left us two million dollars." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 9, 2020 Report Share Posted February 9, 2020 Joke: A Guy was staying in a fancy hotel ... A Guy was staying in a fancy hotel and was enjoying the pool when the manager told him quite bluntly to get out. When asked for the reason, the manager said, "Because you peed in the pool." "Well," replied the swimmer, "lots of people do that." "True," answered the manager, "but you did it from the diving board." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 9, 2020 Report Share Posted February 9, 2020 Joke: A customer sent an order to ... A customer sent an order to a distributor for a large amount of goods totaling a great deal of money. The distributor noticed that the previous bill hadn’t been paid, so he asked his collections manager to leave a voice-mail for them saying, “We can’t ship your new order until you pay for the last one.” The next day the collections manager received a collect phone call, “Please cancel the order. We can’t wait that long.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
worldangel Posted February 9, 2020 Report Share Posted February 9, 2020 Joke: Wise old man A wise old gentleman retired and purchased a modest home near a junior high school. He spent the first few weeks of his retirement in peace and contentment. Then the new school year began. The very next afternoon three young boys, full of youthful after- school enthusiasm, came down his street, beating merrily on every trash can they encountered. The crashing percussion continued day after day, until finally the wise old man decided it was time to take some action. The following afternoon, he walked out to meet the young percussionists as they banged their way down the street. Stopping them, he said, “You kids are a lot of fun. I like to see you express your exuberance like that. Used to do the same thing when I was your age. Will you do me a favor? I'll give you each a dollar if you'll promise to come around every day and do your thing.” The kids were elated and continued to do a bang-up job on the trash cans. After a few days, the old-timer greeted the kids again, but this time he had a sad smile on his face. “This recession is really putting a big dent in my income,” he told them. “From now on, I'll only be able to pay you 50 cents to beat on the cans.” The noisemakers were obviously displeased, but they did accept his offer and continued their afternoon ruckus. A few days later, the wily retiree approached them again as they drummed their way down the street. “Look,” he said, “I haven't received my Social Security check yet, so I'm not going to be able to give you more than 25 cents. Will that be okay?” “A lousy quarter?” the drum leader exclaimed. “If you think we're going to waste our time, beating these cans around for a quarter, you're nuts! No way, mister. We quit!” And the wise old man enjoyed peace and serenity for the rest of his days. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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