Discussion on Married Gay Men (有妇之夫) Whom Hv Gay Sex + An Open Letter to Married Men + Married men's stress & struggles (compiled)

[specs101]

cant send u s msg..hehe it seemed i dont know how lol

[archangelbynight]

Hey guys, don't worry about being a good father. Don't try to either...that's worse. Remember things done in moderation usually ends up with a moderately nice outcome. Try too hard and u will end up doing things that might hurt ur child. Trust me on this one. Been on both sides of the wall. Just be yourself and all will be fine

[GymStock]

Kee_hsiao and specs nice to know you two are getting along well... But conversation can keep to the chat function since now BW have the chat function. Though I must say it is entertaining to read. Haha.

Anyway, kee_hsiao, enjoy the moment you will hv jus u and ur wife. Once the child(ren) comes, it is a whole world of difference. The equilibrium will be total out of sync and u need time to find it again.

These can also be very challenging time for u and wife cos as a 1st time mum, she will be super kan cheong over the baby and can leave u totally out of the pic but yet at the same time she is expecting you to chip in even more to help. But for u as a 1st time dad, you will be so lost on what to help her with (and I ain't referring to household chores) like how to handle d baby, how to change the diapers the way she will want it to be change, how to bath the baby and etc. whatever you do is never good enough for her. Though my wife and your wife are different, but hearing from ohter friends, i think mothers are the same. This is my personal experience. Our world went upside down when my daughter came. At that time we quarreled so many times and over very trivia stuff. So communication at this moment is key. A simple word but of great profund meaning and value.

Lastly, if you can, try not to have the domestic helper look after the baby. Let her do the household chores and help out with other stuff but the baby or kids. This is something I personally believe in whom I hope more new and young parents would take heed. Because I have seen how warped an adult is when he/she is brought up by a maid and what kind of relationship they have with their parents. Imagine this... At the child's wedding, the child didn't cry , neither did the parents, when they hugged, but the bride cried the most when she hug the maid! some may say oh she has such a special bond with the maid. But to me, it is totally wrong. And she is my friend's wife I know her character which I will not go into it here. remember, you bring a child into this world, it is your duty as their parents to raise them up as responsible person in this world when they are grown up. It is not the job of the maid, the school or the society. sorry to be 'preachy' about this. I will not want to go into the subject of sending your kids to top schools by doing whatever you can. Haha.

Anyway for any new daddy, if you want to learnt more about fatherhood, I think you can join the Dad's For Life, they have a lot of activities/seminars to help you to be a good father.

[MarriedTop]

Speaking as a young father (age of 32 with 6 y/o kid), it is about learning curve for both husband and wife to welcome the new family member. Do engage more in all means....

[specs101]

Raising a family is really a touch job...husband and wife plays the most important roles. Gymstock is correct.. Communications must be always open... In decision making, both sides must be weighed and not to mention, respect and understanding must be always there.

[Guest Happy Guy]

I didnt expect my post to spark a new wave of chat and discussion. But isn't it nice to see us guys come together to give advices, rather than just exchanging naught experiences.

Hope this thread will stay alive and we bi married guys here will truly benefit from it.

[kee_hsiao]

I didnt expect my post to spark a new wave of chat and discussion. But isn't it nice to see us guys come together to give advices, rather than just exchanging naught experiences.

Hope this thread will stay alive and we bi married guys here will truly benefit from it.

ya man! I'm quite sure I'll benefit from the advises soon since my marriage is coming real fast. all planned in the pipeline. hahaha.

[kee_hsiao]

I didnt expect my post to spark a new wave of chat and discussion. But isn't it nice to see us guys come together to give advices, rather than just exchanging naught experiences.

Hope this thread will stay alive and we bi married guys here will truly benefit from it.

ya man! I'm quite sure I'll benefit from the advises soon since my marriage is coming real fast. all planned in the pipeline. hahaha.

[Guest Happy Guy]

ya man! I'm quite sure I'll benefit from the advises soon since my marriage is coming real fast. all planned in the pipeline. hahaha.

I just got married early this year. If you need any advice, don't be afraid to ask. I am sure many here can help you.

Edited July 20, 2012 by Happy Guy

[kee_hsiao]

I just got married early this year. If you need any advice, don't be afraid to ask. I am sure many here can help you.

I'm quite thick skin when I need help. hahahaha.

[ahfai]

Glad to see this forum with married men sharing family experiences. Married too with a young gal.

[ahfai]

Glad to see this forum with married men sharing family experiences. Married too with a young gal.

[specs101]

Ahfai. Welcome... So hows being a dad?

[ahfai]

Thxs specs101. Being a dad is great, especially when you spend time with her and she shares stuff with u. Yet to have kids for u?

[Peace56]

its true that single guy (such as me) need to consider on getting married, however i feel that the statement is bit demoralize to single guy.

you may not happy with your married , but you can not use your unhappiness to be used as the measurement for others

in the first place, do u married the woman you love, or you married for the sake to get married?

I believe many bi married guy live in happy live , so i think need to be careful on posting personal recommendation , as it may not fit to others

same as lots of divorce in straight married, but because of that, you can not use as reason for not getting married

Married is very personal things , is your own decision and your own responsibility

Its not easy being single, how difficult to carry status as a single guy, especially if you are nice, smart, good looking, financially independent and still being single.

people will start busy match making and also start talking behind the back why still being single

I hope my posting didnt offended anyone

Married guy need to give a moral support to single bi guy

True to the Tee. Dont let negative comment affect your decision. Marriage can be a good thing. To each his own. Decision is ur own to make.

[specs101]

That's good to hear AHfai... I already have kids.. Sure you will discover too many things about her.. Did you know that only after you started living as husband and wife, its the starting point that you will know more about your partner... ? Does she snore? Does she talk in her sleep? Some funny things such as... Farts too loud hahhahaa

[Guest Happy Guy]

There is no perfect person on this earth. If that's the case, why bother to waste so much time courting the girl, know her "well" then marry her? There is no way to know the other party very well during a courtship. We tend to present our best and hide our bad habits. Only after marriage then the "true pattern" is revealed. Hence, if the true self is revealed only after living together, I feel marriage is about being understanding, accepting the differences of each other, accommodating our lifestyle to the other half's lifestyle. If we cannot do that, a relationship is never going to work for you.

[Rex^Guy]

wonder any chn married guys keen to befriend with me? 25/chn tanned here..

[specs101]

it' s not being perfect, its just being urself. As i have mentioned living together is the starting point that you will discover more about your partner.

[kee_hsiao]

it' s not being perfect, its just being urself. As i have mentioned living together is the starting point that you will discover more about your partner.

discover the "truth" abt your partner more likely. hahahaha... maybe come home and take off her sweaty bra and put on bed... or maybe dunno how to iron clothes coz its always done by maid back home... or maybe scrubbing for hours in toilet coz she feels that there's alot of dead skin to remove... ROFL!!!

[specs101]

hahahaha... Rubbing for hours... Wow maybe stayed too long under the sun

[GymStock]

Whatever it is... remember, your kid(s) will grow up one day... please make sure the kid(s) are not central of your life. U still need time for yourselves. Do not at the end of the day, after the last kid is married off, then you asked who is this stranger that sleeps next to you all these years. Do not neglect your relationship with your wife. Cos at the end of it all, it is just you and her to the house once more.

Anyway, am planning for a 2nd gathering for married men in here. not sure who will be interested to join. JUST dinner only. it is NOT going to be a mass orgy thing. ok? PM me to let me know.

Cheers!

[freakypiano]

Great read guys.

I'm gonna be a dad this November. =)

[kee_hsiao]

Great read guys.

I'm gonna be a dad this November. =)

cool! congrats!!!

[Guest Happy Guy]

Congrats piano :-)

[CuriousFun]

Congrats Freakypiano

[boyfren]

-

Edited March 21, 2021 by boyfren

[Cosmo guy]

Whatever it is... remember, your kid(s) will grow up one day... please make sure the kid(s) are not central of your life. U still need time for yourselves. Do not at the end of the day, after the last kid is married off, then you asked who is this stranger that sleeps next to you all these years. Do not neglect your relationship with your wife. Cos at the end of it all, it is just you and her to the house once more.

Anyway, am planning for a 2nd gathering for married men in here. not sure who will be interested to join. JUST dinner only. it is NOT going to be a mass orgy thing. ok? PM me to let me know.

Cheers!

The hottest gathering in town !

[Cosmo guy]

Great read guys.

I'm gonna be a dad this November. =)

Congrats! Boy or girl?

[kee_hsiao]

Whatever it is... remember, your kid(s) will grow up one day... please make sure the kid(s) are not central of your life. U still need time for yourselves. Do not at the end of the day, after the last kid is married off, then you asked who is this stranger that sleeps next to you all these years. Do not neglect your relationship with your wife. Cos at the end of it all, it is just you and her to the house once more.

great advice!!! how old is/are your kid(s)??

[GymStock]

great advice!!! how old is/are your kid(s)??

Haha kee hsiao, my kid is only 7yo. But the advise is not originate from me, something that I heard in one of those Dad's For Life seminar.

[kee_hsiao]

Haha kee hsiao, my kid is only 7yo. But the advise is not originate from me, something that I heard in one of those Dad's For Life seminar.

I shall attend the seminar when I become a dad myself... in 2yrs time perhaps? hahahahaha...

[GymStock]

I shall attend the seminar when I become a dad myself... in 2yrs time perhaps? hahahahaha...

If u r married and prepping to hv a baby u can start to go attend Liao. Haha no need to wait till then, cos it is always good to know 1st. As they say prevention is better than cure. Haha. Cos when d baby comes, you hv no time for such seminars at least for the 1st ear. May be u should go attend other MCYS seminars for newlywed couples.

[kee_hsiao]

yup. we are sort of planning to attend some after our AD but before honeymoon.

earlier we had went for the marriage convention. quite useful.

[GymStock]

that is good KH... all newlyweds should go and attend their marriage preparation seminars or courses. I wish I attended it b4 it will help lessen so much quarrels we have over the years.

[kee_hsiao]

well... quarrels will still come eventually, with or without the seminars. it only generalized the potential issues we may face and some tricks to deal with. but not sure if it will really be helpful coz ultimately, there are thousands of issues couples face and that cannot be covered in juz a 2-3hrs seminar... all of us have to OJT (on the job training) only after marriage.

[specs101]

husband and wife are two entirely different individuals binded by love, respect and understanding. Marriage has MAGIC because u are able to learn how to settle your indifferences, that through thick and thin, in happiness and sadness, for richer or poorer you and your partner becomes one. We are all humans, each of us has mistakes but that is life.

[kee_hsiao]

weird... i'm following this topic but everytime i do a reply on my iphone safari, i autp unfollow! have to come back on my laptop browser to "follow" back. u guys getting the same issue?

[specs101]

hmmm.. So quite....... Common guys let's JO lol!!!!

[kee_hsiao]

wad??? u wanna organise a "get-together-JO" session meh??? ROFL

[SlimNurse]

im married in my late 20's no kids. I have a loving wife. I always fantasy wearing female clothes and getting dominated by a man. sort of reversal role with my current sex life with my wife.

Unfortunely, i dont have any bi friends or what... and i never tried anything m2m before.

Im slim 190 75c 28.

Sigh... really hope a good guy in the street will pick me up and yea

Btw, im not a sissy or girlie looking here. Just that im slim and have a bit of hour glass figure.

[lovechub_sg]

planning to get married soon.. but cant stop thinking of my (str) married friend.. more so than my gf.. how, how..

[specs101]

Lovechub. U love your gf, maybe ur just too close with your str8 married friend that's why...but someday after you and your gf settled it will change...

[kee_hsiao]

Im slim 190 75c 28.

that is super SLIM la for that height!!!

[SlimNurse]

that is super SLIM la for that height!!!

i tried to put on weight but failed. I dont drink so maybe that is the reason for not having a belly. I always fantasy being a girl.. yea..

[kee_hsiao]

i tried to put on weight but failed. I dont drink so maybe that is the reason for not having a belly. I always fantasy being a girl.. yea..

take protein shakes and gym! build some mass!

[SlimNurse]

gym is not my type i prefer playing sports like basketball, soccer or badminton. Stressing musle on gym kinda sucks to me

[kee_hsiao]

no wonder... u r not building meat. hahaha

maybe u wanna consider increasing ur protein intake daily (meat but avoid soy) and maybe add more when u do ur sports.

or perhaps any exercise and mass building experts here can help?

[Cosmo guy]

no wonder... u r not building meat. hahaha

maybe u wanna consider increasing ur protein intake daily (meat but avoid soy) and maybe add more when u do ur sports.

or perhaps any exercise and mass building experts here can help?

Actually taking protein can increase body weight?

Cos i take the protein supplement on and off

[Cosmo guy]

planning to get married soon.. but cant stop thinking of my (str) married friend.. more so than my gf.. how, how..

Well , it can help u , when u having sex with ur gf, just imagine that u are doing with ur straiggt fren, so u will so horny and ur gf doesnt see u are having problem to get hard on with her

But be careful to not spell his name instead when u are on climax