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What are the things that turns you off during first date ?

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abang Newbie

abang

Posted
Posted

I had a blind date (during the old SGBoy's days) which turned out to be a nightmare.

I was actually requesting for a travel companion to North-Eastern Malaysia, namely Kuantan and beyond for a week.  We exchanged numerous emails and he seems genuine and truly interested.

 

I proposed to meet at Bugis as there are many food establishments there.  In our exchanges of messages, I did asked him about the type of food he dislikes, budget etc. We went to a Japanese bento restaurant because there was a need to plan the trip.  He turned out to be a complete jerk - he was complaining about the food choices and the prices non-stop (it was only $13 then).  

 

Of course, I had wanted to give him a treat and educate him the difference between tempura and .... in the end, 话不投机半句多。。无言的结局。那顿饭，吃得大家都头低低。。最后， 我还是叫服务员分开结账。。 老子没理由请他吃。。。 旅行的意念全毁灭了。

 

 

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Guest

Guest

Posted
Posted
50 minutes ago, abang said:

I had a blind date (during the old SGBoy's days) which turned out to be a nightmare.

I was actually requesting for a travel companion to North-Eastern Malaysia, namely Kuantan and beyond for a week.  We exchanged numerous emails and he seems genuine and truly interested.

 

I proposed to meet at Bugis as there are many food establishments there.  In our exchanges of messages, I did asked him about the type of food he dislikes, budget etc. We went to a Japanese bento restaurant because there was a need to plan the trip.  He turned out to be a complete jerk - he was complaining about the food choices and the prices non-stop (it was only $13 then).  

 

Of course, I had wanted to give him a treat and educate him the difference between tempura and .... in the end, 话不投机半句多。。无言的结局。那顿饭，吃得大家都头低低。。最后， 我还是叫服务员分开结账。。 老子没理由请他吃。。。 旅行的意念全毁灭了。

 

 

That was one horrible date LOL

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Slynn Newbie

Slynn

Posted
Posted (edited)

1) Being judgmental towards others and being inpatient. Yes seeing other people dress badly or behaving sissily isn't anything that's funny to me and I'm not sure if im supposed to laugh at it when you tell me that.  

 

2) Not honoring and respecting your date. My worst first date (and fortunately , the only bad date i had) was one who downgraded the dining plans after seeing me. Seriously? From a restaurant to a $3 roadside stall? Not cool man, i didnt even demand him to pay for me so it was almost like he thought that it's not worth the hassle and trouble. And he left just straight after dinner, where all he did was look at his phone.

AHEM, even if u meet any first date that may not seem like your type, you  either say you are no longer interested or try to at least make it a nice dinner and know people, rather than go through it sloppily.

Edited by Slynn

"To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all"

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abang Newbie

abang

Posted
Posted

Yes the budget now should be $15 for a bento restaurant as the same food sold the food court is about $8.  In addition and unless it is a life or death thingie, both parties should be at least 5 mins earlier than the appointed time.  That is the reason why my phone is always 10 mins faster.  

 

Never give the first impression that you are "busy" and "don't have time".  The date has been pre-arranged.  So, keep that phone and enjoy the company/food even if the date is lousy/dud.

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ace.fortis Newbie

ace.fortis

Posted
Posted

1. Poor eye contact throughout. It's okay for the first few minutes, maybe because he's shy or something.

2. Eye-balling other people, too prominently. Do it discreetly, seriously.

3. Being indecisive in/for all questions. 

4. Being on the phone, nearly all the time. Even worse, if he's on the networking apps. I think games is alright, if he's trying to get you to play with him at the same time.

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Gray32 Newbie

Gray32

Posted
Posted

Trying to make the irony less because I can't really use the term Judgmental if I were to judge what is a bad date. *coughs*

 

1. Funny things, sex or what not. Ugh.

2. Being demanding.

3. Negative is fine, especially HIV Negative is always welcomed. But being waaaay too negative could make me become the same.

4. Lack of Eye-Contact due to phone / passerby, or simply avoiding eye-contact.

5. The other being judgmental . *cough*

 

Dem irony. And the list goes on..

Holy mama.

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abang Newbie

abang

Posted
Posted (edited)
12 hours ago, fab said:

"U know I m looking for fun only right?"

I really would sepak/clap him in public to shame him.

 

I took time to smell nice and spent some time to make sure that my clothes are nice but not loud (like the shirt I had in my avatar)..It is not branded stufff on you that makes you atas - that cute shirt was bought in Penang for RM 39.50 (SGD 13+)  

 

Excuse me, I took an effort but all you want is to undress me.  You think uncle and many here are so desperate for sex..if I need, there are better specimens around!  Bye bye.

 

 越讲越生气 - 以为老哥是发泄工具。

记得小朋友 -一夜情没结果。。。

Edited by abang
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Guest

Guest

Posted
Posted

1. Dresses badly (somehow shows he doesn respect nor prepared for the date)

 

2. Keeps probing, only wants to know what he wants to know, and not answering mine (intentionally or unintentionally)

 

3. Too shy or quiet; I have to lead the conversarion throughout, and tickle him to talk

 

4. Calculative (I am ok to go on dutch for meals but I wouldn ask the other party to pay me back $1.50 merely for a cup of coffee) 

 

5. Yes, common for many, when he keeps using his handphone

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benedict5856 Apprentice

benedict5856

Posted
Posted (edited)

1) Act high class.

 

2) Only think of sex or asking me to have fun with him in the toilet. My goosh!!!!

 

3) Keep on looking at hp. So should I whatsapp u to chit-chat?

 

4) Calculative. Anyway, I always offered to pay for the meal. Its just a meal, no need to split half. Else do I have to calculate how many meat u took, or vege? Or u ate both of the crab claws?

 

5) Think or act u are damn cute or handsome and that I am dying to suck yr dick. I not damn handsome but I have no lack.

 

6) Brainless. Talk without thinking. Cannot analyse things.

 

7) Wearing earrings, nose ring, cock ring, nipple ring, etc. Its an instant turn-off, even if u look cute.

 

8) Common topic will be great.

Edited by benedict5856
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4evaboring Community Regular

4evaboring

Posted
Posted

1.  BAD PERSONAL HYGIENE  (bad breathe, smelly/dirty clothing, BO)

2. Always assuming (Some people like to over think stuff like seriously)

3. Showing off (I don't need to know how rich are u or how many paper certificate)

4. Interrogating (Not comfortable to release too much info on first date and I didn't commit any crime)

5. Weird (Behave or talk about stuff that normally don't do)

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abang Newbie

abang

Posted
Posted
4 hours ago, bigdanbeam said:

Using body language to show "uninterestedness".( Can't think of a better word for now)

 

Eg. Walking behind me and having to turn my head more than 90degrees to converse. 

 

...disinterested is the right word.. why is he walking behind you..

 

 

 

 

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suckmegood Contributor

suckmegood

Posted
Posted

1) bad breath

2) BO

3) really really bad dressing up for the event (eg. wearing flip flops for dinner at mid-level restaurants) - dress expensive is not necessary but should dress appropriately 

4) over sarcastic and judgemental

5) rude 

6) act high class

7) no common topics (or common sense for some)

8) too engaged with phone and not with me

9) too touchy (unless we are hooking up of course)

10) probing too much details about my personal life and yet refuse to share about his own

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suckmegood Contributor

suckmegood

Posted
Posted
15 minutes ago, bluemoonbird said:

I went out with this guy and he ate bak kut teh for dinner. He bit the bak kut and his tooth got chipped off. I was so bloody grossed out that block him everywhere and never want to see him in my life again. Trauma.

 

scarred for life! lol

 

lesson learnt. don't date at bak kut teh stores. lol

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fab Grand Master

fab

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, bluemoonbird said:

I went out with this guy and he ate bak kut teh for dinner. He bit the bak kut and his tooth got chipped off. I was so bloody grossed out that block him everywhere and never want to see him in my life again. Trauma.

 

U do know its not his fault right?

 

Personally I think u should sympathize with him instead. 

鍾意就好，理佢男定女

 

never argue with the guests. let them bark all they want.

 

结缘不结怨

解怨不解缘

 

After I have said what I wanna say, I don't care what you say.

 

看穿不说穿

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Guest

Guest

Posted
Posted
On 1/10/2016 at 1:19 PM, Slynn said:

1) Being judgmental towards others and being inpatient. Yes seeing other people dress badly or behaving sissily isn't anything that's funny to me and I'm not sure if im supposed to laugh at it when you tell me that.  

 

2) Not honoring and respecting your date. My worst first date (and fortunately , the only bad date i had) was one who downgraded the dining plans after seeing me. Seriously? From a restaurant to a $3 roadside stall? Not cool man, i didnt even demand him to pay for me so it was almost like he thought that it's not worth the hassle and trouble. And he left just straight after dinner, where all he did was look at his phone.

AHEM, even if u meet any first date that may not seem like your type, you  either say you are no longer interested or try to at least make it a nice dinner and know people, rather than go through it sloppily.

i would rather tell the guy im not interested than continuing the whole date.

 

waste both of our time.

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Guest

Guest

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, bluemoonbird said:

I went out with this guy and he ate bak kut teh for dinner. He bit the bak kut and his tooth got chipped off. I was so bloody grossed out that block him everywhere and never want to see him in my life again. Trauma.

waaaaaaa

u very mean lehhh

 

its not like he can control his teeth from falling..........

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gummibear Newbie

gummibear

Posted
Posted

1. Tardiness

2. Trying hard to impress to the point of being obnoxious.

3. Throwing tantrums or bitching like an office auntie in public.

4. Thinking that all dates lead to a romp under the sheets.

5. Taping down our conversation for "posterity" sake.

 

What gives? :P

ksy1f2jn2osi403qdr6f.gif

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cycle25 Collaborator

cycle25

Posted
Posted (edited)

I think for me an undecisive person can be a turn-off. If we have to decide on a movie or something, and you ask for an opinion but they respond with "anything" or "up to you", I'd really like to not have to put up with that. Perhaps its just me but I think it goes beyond dating too.

 

Another thing would probably be for someone to be entirely different from who they portray themselves to be online/over messages or through other points of contact. But then again, only been on 'dates' with 2 guys.

 

2 hours ago, Guest said:

What are the real-life examples of a Good date ?

 

 

For me it is about enjoying the time together, getting to know each other better. My bf and I enjoy cycling - one memorable date was both of us cycling from the west to Wheelers Yard cafe in Balestier. We took our time and him being a more experienced cyclist looked out for me. Another thing we both enjoy are dogs. Once we went to a dog petting shop together and just sat around with about 7 dogs all over the place. I guess those are real-life examples from me. Just being comfortable with each other, having a good time and most of all enjoying the relaxing company.

Edited by cycle25
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Guest

Guest

Posted
Posted
18 hours ago, fab said:

 

U do know its not his fault right?

 

Personally I think u should sympathize with him instead. 

 

He was probably very distressed and embarassed. A little sympathy would go a long way.

 

Anyway, better he find out now how you will deal with adversity in the future.

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suckmegood Contributor

suckmegood

Posted
Posted
14 hours ago, cycle25 said:

I think for me an undecisive person can be a turn-off. If we have to decide on a movie or something, and you ask for an opinion but they respond with "anything" or "up to you", I'd really like to not have to put up with that. Perhaps its just me but I think it goes beyond dating too.

 

well, I think it's where both have different characters matches. you can't have 2 strong-headed and OVER decisive folks in a date and both wants to go to a specific place for whatever reasons. 

 

so, usually, one person takes on the backseat and let the other do all the small little decision-making. 

 

along the the same line, wouldn't u think that u are the indecisive one during that date because u don't wanna decide and wanna let the date do all the thinking? for all u know, he was probably forming the exact same impression of u. lol

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Guest

Guest

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, lonelyglobe said:

to sum up all the points mentioned in 1 sentence: "he is simply not my type"

 

I agree. Sometimes when he is your type you will be blind to all his faults, even his BO can be an aphrodisiac. Haha

 

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cycle25 Collaborator

cycle25

Posted
Posted
10 hours ago, suckmegood said:

 

well, I think it's where both have different characters matches. you can't have 2 strong-headed and OVER decisive folks in a date and both wants to go to a specific place for whatever reasons. 

 

so, usually, one person takes on the backseat and let the other do all the small little decision-making. 

 

along the the same line, wouldn't u think that u are the indecisive one during that date because u don't wanna decide and wanna let the date do all the thinking? for all u know, he was probably forming the exact same impression of u. lol

I agree with you. However, you have to look at the context in which I was coming from. I specifically stated that I asked for an opinion. :)

 

With regards to me being the indecisive one, not really. You wouldn't know the context of the situation which could be me offering to let the other party's opinion be heard. I'd rather not get into the nitty gritty. In any case, those are my pet peeves. TS asked and I answered.

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caindukkershannery Explorer

caindukkershannery

Posted
Posted

Lemme see, hmm...

1. Being late to our date. I'm an impatient man.

2. Keeps checking on his phone. That irritates me as it makes me feel like he's not putting an effort into knowing me. I should be his only interest on our first date.

3. We have nothing in common. As in we can't continue any topics for more than one sentence every time someone starts a new topic.

4. Looking like a mess. Proves how little he wants to impress me.

5. Rude. Complaining about the restaurant I chose the whole freaking night. Being rude to service staffs etc.

6. Bad sex. If we actually get to that. Sex is very important to me, bad sex means we are incompatible.

Yep I guess that's all.

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Guest

Guest

Posted
Posted
4 hours ago, caindukkershannery said:

Lemme see, hmm...

1. Being late to our date. I'm an impatient man.

2. Keeps checking on his phone. That irritates me as it makes me feel like he's not putting an effort into knowing me. I should be his only interest on our first date.

3. We have nothing in common. As in we can't continue any topics for more than one sentence every time someone starts a new topic.

4. Looking like a mess. Proves how little he wants to impress me.

5. Rude. Complaining about the restaurant I chose the whole freaking night. Being rude to service staffs etc.

6. Bad sex. If we actually get to that. Sex is very important to me, bad sex means we are incompatible.

Yep I guess that's all.

Wow.

 

First date and have S** ?

 

Thats too fast isn't it

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Kwon Newbie

Kwon

Posted
Posted

Being too cool. I know gays are cool. But some people expresses their coolness by sarcastic manner to everything in the world. 

 

They criticize everything such as singers, songs, movies, etc that i talk to him. Or, If I say something, he talks about things better than mine in every sentence. 

 

I thought he doesnt like me so i didnt ask more date, but his friend told me he liked me. Then WHY! 

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ZealousZeno Newbie

ZealousZeno

Posted
Posted
On 1/21/2016 at 2:43 PM, Kwon said:

Being too cool. I know gays are cool. But some people expresses their coolness by sarcastic manner to everything in the world. 

 

They criticize everything such as singers, songs, movies, etc that i talk to him. Or, If I say something, he talks about things better than mine in every sentence. 

 

I thought he doesnt like me so i didnt ask more date, but his friend told me he liked me. Then WHY! 

 

Sometimes peps just dun know how to express themselves ~.~ ... they try to bring across a point in the wrong manner which leads to misunderstandings... u just need to be open minded and place urself in their shoe to understand the point they are trying to bring across ~

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Brocklm Newbie

Brocklm

Posted
Posted

For me, its the following:

1) lateness (unable to show up even after 3 hours of waiting)

2) no common topics

3) keep using the phone

4) looking at the time on the phone or on their watches

5) already had boyfriend and yet keep saying don't have before the meet but meet already say got boyfriend or already dating. 

 

Above are the points, I feel its a turn off during the first meet.

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