Discussion on Married Gay Men (有妇之夫) Whom Hv Gay Sex + An Open Letter to Married Men + Married men's stress & struggles (compiled)

[Guest Guest]

Girls don't like anal. My first and only anal was with a shemale.

[creme]

Shemale? that must be hot.

[Guest Btm]

Have been fucked by married men before, quite shiok.

[batamsg]

Have been fucked by married men before, quite shiok.

good right?

[Guest Btm]

good right?

 

Wow, your stats look good, would love to be raped by you... But me not mature

[Guest Admit]

I cant speak for the other married men, but for me watching her suck my cock just makes me horny to try one myself. I did try and has nvr stop. I guess i am also artracted to the male body and can appreciate the whole package. My wife gives such good head and i want to feel what she feels. I know how is it to fuck but since i am versatile, most of my m2m encounters would somehow end up me being fucked. Dont get me wrong, fucking my wife and watchin her moan while she gets thrashed in all possible positions majes me horny, but its the turgid hard cock that is what makes me want to have his warm cum splatter over me.

From what i can deduce here , you're Gay.

[batamsg]

From what i can deduce here , you're Gay.

i totally agree

[replay2969]

I am a married discreet man who likes only mature Chinese man in late 40s to 60s.

I met a mature married man 5 years ago during my business trip to Indonesia, and he was 56 year old (How we met, all these are long story). We exchange contacts and have been communicating since...Both of us are Tops and recently we wanted me to give him a screw... And I was shocked, he was manly and mature with a nice Round Butt! He did ask me to do it slowly & of course with condom...At first penetration, he yelled and there was blood so we stopped coz he was in pain! After a few slow penetrations, he is now becoming to like it! He tried to penetrate me, I rejected him and he is ok with the rejection. I did ask him why he like to be penetrated...he said he wanted to try a different role, his wife is no longer into sex and his wife did a lousy sucking...I smile!

[Dorkable]

Coz hearing a masculine bottom guy moan while pounding his ass is a major turn on and on a different level from a wife?

[creme]

Coz hearing a masculine bottom guy moan while pounding his ass is a major turn on and on a different level from a wife?

So very true.

Coz hearing a masculine bottom guy moan while pounding his ass is a major turn on and on a different level from a wife?

[batamsg]

don't worry.

maybe u look too hard.

usually good sincere ones are right in front. Most cant see it

[GachiMuchi]

CONFESSIONS OF A MARRIED MAN

Posted on October 26, 2014by octobermansg

 

PROFILE

Name:  Thomas (Not his real name)

Age:  50+ years old Religion: 

Roman Catholic

Orientation:  More gay than straight.  Can be happy having sex with wife but needs to have man with man sex. Will not feel lost without women.

Status:  Married for over 20 years

Children:  2 – in their 20s

FACE-TO-FACE INTERVIEW WITH THOMAS:  MONDAY, 23 JUNE 2014

Growing Up in the 60s and 70s

It was a time when being gay was not something out in the open.

Thomas  confesses that he didn’t know very much about what was going on except the presence of some advertisements and personals in the newspapers of men looking to meet other men with ‘similar interests’.  Being gay was equated with being an Ah Gua(阿官)1.  In the army, soldiers and NS men were punished for homosexuality.  It was the way of society at that time that young men would naturally get married, no questions allowed.  And people who were brave enough to rebel faced a lot of social pressure to get settled down.  It was a very lonely time.

Thomas also remembers that New Nation2 had a big spread about VD (Venereal Disease – loosely used to refer to Sexually Transmitted Infections – STIs) when he was a teenager and there was a section about how you could catch it.  He was frightened enough to go to a family doctor to have a blood test as he had been having oral sex with two different people older than him.

Gay Sexual Awakening

His first sexual experience was when he was 9 years old with neighbor Gor Gor(哥哥)3 and found it enjoyable.

At 14, Thomas realized that something was different.  He was becoming aware of the church’s stand on homosexuality as he listened to sermons that condemned it.  Being religious then, an only son and talks with his father and his father’s reaction to “Ah Gua”, he felt real pressure to be straight. When a relative was found out to be gay, his mum declared that she will kill herself if he was gay.

At 18, he enlisted and was in a unit where he was in the constant company of lots of men both straight and gay.  This had an impact on him – that being “straight” was the right course because the only outwardly “gay” members were “Ah Gua” in their mannerism and speech and he could not accept being “one of the sisters”.

Marriage

Thomas remembers no real struggle before marriage.  In fact, he remembers being so eager to get married as proof he was straight. “All will be ok after you get married; it’s a passing phase”. He was told this, time and time again, in confessions and conversations with priests at church but now in retrospect, he regrets the decision.  However, he adds that he is appreciative of his ‘good life’ now – the joys of seeing his children grow up and having a wife who is a friend with whom he can share a lot of things and someone he does love.

After marriage, he continued to have sexual feelings for men and within 3 years was seeing the man he had relations with when he was a teen. In the 1990s, he discovered the Internet Relay Chat (IRC)  and indulged in ONS (one night stands) but restricted them to petting and occasional blow jobs. By 2000, he was going all the way. He justified it as a compromise – no strings attached – but it did affect his sex life with his wife as there were long periods of no sex with her, mainly to avert passing to her something from the liaisons. Sex resumed after blood tests but it did not last. And the whole cycle would repeat itself again.

Thomas confessed to falling in love with a guy in early 2000 and the guilt feelings were so strong that he suffered a nervous breakdown. He could not cope with the pressures of church, family, work and “betraying” the wife who loved him and yet having such feelings for the guy. Fortunately, he sought counselling at a local counselling and care center and the 4 years of counseling basically helped him to accept the way things are and to realize that he was gay.

The 3^rd Party

After 20 years of marriage, he is now in a stable relationship with a 41 year old guy called Joseph (not his real name).  He met him on the IRC and it all started as phone sex in 2008.  Then they met and was only cuddling and mutual masturbating.

It’s been 6 years now.

Joseph knows that Thomas is married but this situation suits him fine because he himself needs to spend time with his mum and cannot really commit too much time and attachment to the relationship.  On Thomas’s part, he wants a steady boyfriend because he is afraid of bringing some sexual infections back home should he have sex with random men.  He feels safer with a steady committed boyfriend.

They make it a point to meet once a week to watch movies, go window shopping and of course have sex which happens about once a fortnight in a hotel.

Thomas and Joseph value honesty in their relationship.  They have an agreement that if Joseph should meet someone else in future he must be honest about it and tell Thomas.  Thomas, himself recalls how he was open with Joseph when he met an old flame and they had sex.

They go to Action For AIDS’ anonymous testing at Kelantan Lane together every 4 to 6 months. They go together as a way to show each other that they have nothing to hide.

Thomas confesses that he is frightened about the repercussions of having a third party to his marriage.  But it is either this or his sanity. He and his wife have gone for marriage counseling after he let slip that he had sex with a guy. He did tell her about his history before they married and assured her that once married, it would be “all in the past”. Although it severely hurt and disappointed her, that liaison did not come as a surprise to her. His gut feeling is that she knows he may be in a relationship although it might be a “don’t ask, don’t tell” situation right now.  His wife had actually told the counsellor, “he is wired this way, what can I do?”  Perhaps she sees this situation as a sort of compromise.  But she has said that she will ask for a divorce if she finds out about a third party.

Future Plans

“Don’t think too much about the future.”  That’s how Thomas feels when asked about how he thinks all this is going to end up.  “Guess, we will become good friends…more than just lovers,” Thomas adds referring to Joseph.

He has promised his wife that he will grow old with her; Joseph understands this.

Advice

Thomas pensively answers when he is asked whether he has any advice to others who may be facing the same problems.  “If you know that you are gay, think hard first – if you need a man in your life, then don’t get married.  Not true that you when get married, all will be okay.

___________________________________________

He hopes that the ‘rainbow’

which is the symbol of the gay community

would likewise also be a symbol of the embracing of diversity

and the acceptance of the married gay man.

___________________________________________

He knows that many people, even those from the gay community will be judgmental.  He knows there is nothing he can do about what others feel but hopes for some understanding.  He hopes that the ‘rainbow’ which is the symbol of the gay community would likewise also be a symbol of the embracing of diversity and the acceptance of the married gay man.

1 Ah Gua – 阿官Dialect derogatory term to refer more accurately to transgenders or effeminate men but used widely and loosely to refer to all gay men nowadays

2 New Nation – a Singaporean evening tabloid now defunct

3 Gor Gor – 哥哥 Dialect address for an elder brother both biological and non-biological

—

Call Oogachaga Hotline (6226-2002 – Tuesdays to Thursdays 6 to 10 pm and Saturdays 2 to 5 pm) if you need someone to talk to about your issues.

[journey]

Thanks for sharing. A good read for all.

[cutejack]

Yeah.very good experience to share.thx

[Guest wozzit]

Sure makes you realise the issues and pressures many faced and continue to face when pressed to get married even knowing they had gay feelings. The need for a gay outlet, the fear, the secrecy, the continuous guilt, 4 years of therapy - FOUR years! - the concern about hurting others . . . And the effect this has on everyone involved. Tough life!

[batamsg]

life is not tough.

making right decision is

[Guest Guest]

Yesterday, I met this man whom I knew him in the gym and had sex many years ago, He's now married and was shopping with his wife and 2 boys. He saw me then and gave me a wink. I left the shop. I did not know he was following me. Later, he even followed me into the toilet and reached his hand out when we were at the urinals. I had no mood to play with him anymore since he's married and I left immediately.

[G_M]

seeking married men to be friends. 29yo chn here.

 

The main forum is for discussion NOT for your ads.

 

Please do not post any ad in the main forum meant for discussion.

 

This is friendly warning by the mod.

 

The next ad posted in the main forum will get you a warning point.

 

If you are not sure why you are getting this message go read the rules http://www.blowingwind.org/forum/index.php?showtopic=67&p=410979

 

Regards

 

GM

[G_M]

I'm looking for married man who don't mind commit with me. 24 this year

Please stop thinking with your cock head and think with your brain for a change.

You had been warned recently NOT to post ads in the main forum.

It seems you don't understand simple English.

You leave me no choice but to send you on a holiday for 1 week.

If you still don't understand English and if you continue to defy the rules of our forum by posting ads, you will enjoy a much longer holiday.

Good bye!

[Guest MochaPerv]

On 1/18/2011 at 11:56 PM, Guest Moral said:

Another moral crusader telling others to live life the way he wanted. U r no different to religious bigots.

Marriage vows? The traditional Chinese marriage has no such thing. Marriage is to form a family with children to carry on the family name. Sex outside marriage is tolerated as long as he takes care of the family. He has done his duty. Can't he enjoy life at the same time?

I'm gay & not bound by the rules set by the hetro world. Hey we r given the devine right to sex, sex, & more sex with many men!

I'm not married. I support married gay men seeking gay sex. There r already not enough gay men to go around. Moreover I believe most r married. Pls don't deprive me the largest pool of gay men!

 

Right on!!

[Guest Call me john]

Any married man here who is trying to live a normal straight life. How you control your urge to have sex with a man? 

[tinkymale]

DIY by watching pron? Or go gym ?

[Guest mother]

Stay in the closet , lock the doors with unbreakable steel locks and throw away the keys. P

 

Problem solved.

 

 

 

[Roger]

Just keep busy and time will travel very fast, before you even realize it.

 

[Guest Guest married too]

Same situation.

 

Did all of the above..kept myself busy with work,,,,gym till I cant lift no more and even threw away the keys to my lock but the thought and desire seems to keep coming back.

 

I'm at my wits end.  

[Guest fbuddy]

both of u should become f**k buddy.

case closed

[Guest lucas]

keep yourself busy where got use

once you see a hot guy, all hell breaks loose....

[Dualxxx]

There are many avenues to satisfy yr needs that do not compromise our supposed normal straight lives. 

Edited August 7, 2016 by Dualxxx

[Guest Second 'wife']

Find a discreet fuck buddy and keep him as your second 'Wife'. 

I have been doing that for 30 yrs... Be sure to be nice and fair to both Wife and fuck buddy... Meaning satisfy both...Everyone is happy. 

[Guest Not easy]

It seems as easy as 1-2-3 but reality its not. A lot of temptations that need to resist. Depriving self satisfaction for sake of family. 

[Guest namo dizang pusa]

just stay loyal to ur wife. she sacrificed herself to u. its not fair for her.

[sgmarriedman]

Anyone want to connect n explore pm me please

[Guest Guest]

10 hours ago, Guest Call me john said:

Any married man here who is trying to live a normal straight life. How you control your urge to have sex with a man? 

 

7 hours ago, Guest Guest married too said:

Same situation.

 

Did all of the above..kept myself busy with work,,,,gym till I cant lift no more and even threw away the keys to my lock but the thought and desire seems to keep coming back.

 

I'm at my wits end.  

 

4 hours ago, Guest Not easy said:

It seems as easy as 1-2-3 but reality its not. A lot of temptations that need to resist. Depriving self satisfaction for sake of family. 

 

49 minutes ago, sgmarriedman said:

Anyone want to connect n explore pm me please

 

How did all of you get married in the first place? Did you guys even go through the usual courtship etc? Or was it after a loveless marriage that you realised that you are gay? Perhaps it was threats of being cut off from the family inheritance? How did you guys get into such a state in the first place?  

[snowball]

世界上只有两种悲剧: 一种是，得不到想要的；一种是，得到了不珍惜。

人生中，不可能十全十美，一定存有遗憾。

隐瞒的婚姻，一开始就是一种欺骗，对已婚者而言，

则是多了一些包袱，是对家庭的责任。

一旦出轨和出柜，意味着你的未来可能导致造成重大严重的威胁伤害，

这不单是个人问题，东窗事发，你可否坦然面对接受? 

如何取舍，选择权在于你。

[Guest Guest married too]

Here's the story...

 

Never was gay...infact I like sex w woman alot.  Muff diving and many affairs.

But now I find myself on the other end....I dont get excited when a "handsome" guy walks past...infact I think nothing of it and not attracted.  But I find myself wanting to be submissive and what you people call be a "btm".  

 

I really dun understand this behaviour and actually resorted to seeing a doctor thinking that my testosterone level was low or estrogen level high.  Test came back low normal and estrogen level within normal limits. I was actually disappointed as I cannot blame it on that.

 

Now I am at my wits end as the desire has sometimes gotten the best of me despite all the resistance not to. 

 

I do not know whether to give in or continue fighting as it is a losing battle I've been fighting for at least 5 years. Sigh.E

[Guest Use dildo]

Ask ur Wife to wear a strapped Dildo to fuck your ass... Bring some excitement to your marriage that way too while staying faithful to her...

 

[Guest Guest]

13 minutes ago, Guest Use dildo said:

Ask ur Wife to wear a strapped Dildo to fuck your ass... Bring some excitement to your marriage that way too while staying faithful to her...

 

 

Not a married person her. But such deviation from the usual sex may strain the relationship even more than keeping it a secret.

[Guest Hot Swimmer]

Go bangkok and pay handsome masseur to satisfy your desire once in a year. Hope these will ease your problem from driving you nut.

[Guest Handsome bi]

find a handsome bi and tell yr Wife u don't mind she enjoys Two cocks as Lobg as you get to share the cock w her too. So the bi can fuck both of you and u can also fuck yr Wife and the bi....

good arrangement!

[Carpenter]

4 hours ago, Guest Guest married too said:

Here's the story...

 

Never was gay...infact I like sex w woman alot.  Muff diving and many affairs.

But now I find myself on the other end....I dont get excited when a "handsome" guy walks past...infact I think nothing of it and not attracted.  But I find myself wanting to be submissive and what you people call be a "btm".  

 

I really dun understand this behaviour and actually resorted to seeing a doctor thinking that my testosterone level was low or estrogen level high.  Test came back low normal and estrogen level within normal limits. I was actually disappointed as I cannot blame it on that.

 

Now I am at my wits end as the desire has sometimes gotten the best of me despite all the resistance not to. 

 

I do not know whether to give in or continue fighting as it is a losing battle I've been fighting for at least 5 years. Sigh.E

Maybe u r just submissive, doesnt mean you have to go for guys just because u want someone to fuck u in the ass. N as u say, u feel nothing for man so just buy strap on, teach ur wife to be the dominance mistress like n tell her to fuck u in the ass w the strapon.

 

12 hours ago, Guest Guest married too said:

Same situation.

 

Did all of the above..kept myself busy with work,,,,gym till I cant lift no more and even threw away the keys to my lock but the thought and desire seems to keep coming back.

 

I'm at my wits end.  

Keep fighting, til u old in ur 60s so by that time comes, most gays wont find u attractive anymore so even if u threw urself at them, they will just be the one avoiding you. So by then, hold on.

[G_M]

6 hours ago, sgmarriedman said:

Anyone want to connect n explore pm me please

 

You had been previously warned.

 

You are hereby given 2 weeks suspension for violating our rules.

[Roger]

7 hours ago, Guest Use dildo said:

Ask ur Wife to wear a strapped Dildo to fuck your ass... Bring some excitement to your marriage that way too while staying faithful to her...

 

 

Yes, I did see a Japanese straight porn where this handsome Jap guy engage the service of a female sexual therapist, she came over and after some foreplay put on a penis strap,  he happily oral her fake dick. She then entered him and he was a very happy guy after that.

 

[Guest MrJr]

Similar situation. My past ... spent 1 month when i was 14 yrs old (during school holiday) mutual jerk and groped my male cousin ( he was staying over for holidays.still i never felt that i was gay. No other sexual encounters with guys. I loved girls. They made me horny to the point i feel like molesting them when i see them. First girlfriend at 26.. loved eating her pussy. Never made love cos she wanted to wait til marriage.. same with 2nd gf.. then finally 3rd gf came along and we made love occasionally and now after 4 yrs .. we just got married. I'm 37 now. I actually started fantasizing about sucking cock at many points in my life but it was just for a few days then the urge would pass and i would be back to horning over women. I love women and have to try very hard not to molest them when i see them but strangely actual sex with my wife feels like a chore. We got married 3 months ago but we only had sex twice and the last time i actually went soft halfway thru. She noticed this and has been quite upset and disturbed lately.And i have to try very hard to cum. A lot of times i imagine someone eating my butthole while i fuck her and only then can i cum. When i shower i jerk off fantasizing about being kept as a sex slave by an older man and being passed around to his friends for an entire night and fucked til i pass out. And 2 days ago i stood at a urinal and when a guy watched me and signalled me.. i followed him to a cubicle. Then at the last moment before we shut the door, i walked out of the toilet. But in my heart i wanted to suck his cock so bad my knees were wobbly and my heart was racing.I dont know what the hell is wrong with me. 

[Guest Shame on you]

Since you married the girl you shld be responsible enough to fuck her regularly to satisfy her. After three months and you already went soft on her... How can this marriage last? Get her to wear sexy lingerie or try different sex positions with you.... May be even suck your cock? 

If you are still not satisfied by her... Then have very discreet sex outside with other willing guys... There r plenty to choose from. Picking one at urinals is definitely not the way since you risk getting caught or getting std.... Get one of those horny Nus or NTU or SMU students... They r all dying to lose their virginity... And they r likely clean and std free. You just have to befriend a few and they can become your outside fuck buddies. 

[G_M]

1 hour ago, Erectus said:

drop me a message and let's chat our blues away ..

 

1  warning point

 

Next suspension.

[bi-guy1969]

On 8/7/2016 at 11:43 PM, Guest Guest married too said:

Here's the story...

 

Never was gay...infact I like sex w woman alot.  Muff diving and many affairs.

But now I find myself on the other end....I dont get excited when a "handsome" guy walks past...infact I think nothing of it and not attracted.  But I find myself wanting to be submissive and what you people call be a "btm".  

 

I really dun understand this behaviour and actually resorted to seeing a doctor thinking that my testosterone level was low or estrogen level high.  Test came back low normal and estrogen level within normal limits. I was actually disappointed as I cannot blame it on that.

 

Now I am at my wits end as the desire has sometimes gotten the best of me despite all the resistance not to. 

 

I do not know whether to give in or continue fighting as it is a losing battle I've been fighting for at least 5 years. Sigh.E

 

You need to identify what you mean by "wanting to be submissive". There are straight men who want to be fucked by women only, not men, because they are straight. If your urge is to be fucked by men not necessarily women, then I strongly feel it's bisexuality, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.

 

If so, I would advise continue to fight it, simply because you are married, not because bisexuality is wrong (ever since I have accepted it is perfectly ok, my life has been truly enjoyable - especially ogling and fantasising about sexy women/men). In your case, it is like tempting to have an extra-marital affair with another woman. Whether be it trying with another man, or having a straight extra-marital affair, to me it is not right, BUT I don't judge. I'm just saying it's not right because it hurts your wife and kids.

 

 

 

[FluteGuan]

On Sunday, August 07, 2016 at 11:43 PM, Guest Guest married too said:

Here's the story...

 

Never was gay...infact I like sex w woman alot.  Muff diving and many affairs.

But now I find myself on the other end....I dont get excited when a "handsome" guy walks past...infact I think nothing of it and not attracted.  But I find myself wanting to be submissive and what you people call be a "btm".  

 

I really dun understand this behaviour and actually resorted to seeing a doctor thinking that my testosterone level was low or estrogen level high.  Test came back low normal and estrogen level within normal limits. I was actually disappointed as I cannot blame it on that.

 

Now I am at my wits end as the desire has sometimes gotten the best of me despite all the resistance not to. 

 

I do not know whether to give in or continue fighting as it is a losing battle I've been fighting for at least 5 years. Sigh.E

Might be spiritual bindage, not s&m bondage,,,

[cutejack]

Ya nowadays i like to play with str8 married guys..shiok...i want the entire male on earth to hate women....hahahahaha

[Guest FoxCatcher]

37 minutes ago, cutejack said:

Ya nowadays i like to play with str8 married guys..shiok...i want the entire male on earth to hate women....hahahahaha

Would like to see the wives' reaction when they know that the 狐狸精 is in fact a man. 

[Guest for straight]

13 hours ago, cutejack said:

Ya nowadays i like to play with str8 married guys..shiok...i want the entire male on earth to hate women....hahahahaha

 

 

Where to find them sia?