worldangel Posted July 30, 2025 Posted July 30, 2025 Joke: Doesn't Even Need Glasses John: "My grandpa is 98 years old, and he doesn't even use glasses." Jack: "Wow, that is incredible!" John: "Yep, he drinks straight from the bottle." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 30, 2025 Posted July 30, 2025 Joke: Natural talents I have never made a fool of my mother-in-law, I just leave her to display her natural talents herself. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted July 30, 2025 Posted July 30, 2025 Joke: Check Up So I went to the doctor last week for a check-up, and the doctor was like "you have GOT to stop masturbating!" and I was like "oh no Doc! Why?!?" And he said "because I'm trying to examine you!" shyc 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 1, 2025 Posted August 1, 2025 Joke: Honey, has anyone ever told you.... After the party, as the couple was driving home, the woman asks her husband, "Honey, has anyone ever told you how handsome, sexy and irresistible to women you are?" The flattered husband said, "No, dear they haven't." The wife yells, "Then what the heck gave you THAT idea at the party tonight?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 1, 2025 Posted August 1, 2025 Joke: A guy had just returned from two... A guy had just returned from two weeks of vacation. He asked his boss for two more weeks off to get married. "What?" shouted the boss, "I can't give you more time now. Why didn't you get married while you were off?" "Are you nuts?" he replied. "That would have ruined my whole vacation." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 1, 2025 Posted August 1, 2025 Joke: Ice Cream What flavours of ice cream do you have?" inquired the customer. "Vanilla, strawberry, and chocolate," answered the new waitress in a hoarse whisper. Trying to be sympathetic, the customer asked, "Do you have laryngitis?" "No...." replied the new waitress with some effort, "just...erm.... vanilla, strawberry, and chocolate." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 1, 2025 Posted August 1, 2025 Joke: True Happiness A couple is lying in bed. The man says, "I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world." The woman replies, "I'll miss you!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 2, 2025 Posted August 2, 2025 Joke: Fertilizer A farmer was driving along the road with a load of fertilizer. A little boy, playing in front of his house, saw him and called, "What've you got in your truck?" "Fertilizer," the farmer replied. "What are you going to do with it?" asked the little boy. "Put it on strawberries," answered the farmer. "You ought to live here," the little boy advised him. "We put sugar and cream on ours." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 2, 2025 Posted August 2, 2025 Joke: There are three kinds of men... There are three kinds of men: The ones that learn by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence for themselves. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 2, 2025 Posted August 2, 2025 Joke: An apple a day.... While visiting a friend who was in the hospital, I noticed several pretty nurses, each of whom was wearing a pin designed to look like an apple. I asked one nurse what the pin signified. "Nothing," she said with a smile. "It's just to keep the doctors away." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 2, 2025 Posted August 2, 2025 Joke: That's What It Stands For Son: “Mom, can I have $20?” Mom: “Does it look like I am made of money?” Son: “Well, isn't that what M-O-M stands for?” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 3, 2025 Posted August 3, 2025 Joke: The doorbell rings. A man open... The doorbell rings. A man opens the door and there's his mother-in-law on the front step. She asks, "Can I stay here for a few days?" The man says, "Sure you can." And he closes the door. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 3, 2025 Posted August 3, 2025 Joke: A mother-in-law sent two ties... A mother-in-law sent two ties to her son-in-law. Some weeks later, she was invited for lunch, and so he wore one of them in the hope of pleasing her. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 3, 2025 Posted August 3, 2025 Joke: The Watch Little Johnny sees that his friend at school has a new watch so he asks him how he got it. "I waited until I heard the bedsprings squeaking in my folk's bedroom and then I ran in. My father gave me a watch to get rid of me.", replied the little friend. Little Johnny, thinking that this was a cool idea waited that night until he heard the bedsprings squeaking rhythmically and then ran into his folk's bedroom. "What do you want!", asked the father gruffly. "I want a watch!", said Johnny. "Well sit down and shut up!", replied the father. shyc and yhtang 1 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 3, 2025 Posted August 3, 2025 Joke: A close shave A man enters a barber shop for a shave. While the barber is foaming him up, he mentions the problem he has getting a close shave around his cheeks. "I have just the thing," says the barber taking a small wooden ball from a nearby drawer. "Just place this between your cheek and gum." The client places the ball in his mouth and proceeds with the closest shave the man has ever experienced. After a few strokes, the client asks in garbled speech "And what if I swallow it?" "No problem" says the barber. "Just bring it back tomorrow like everyone else does!" shyc 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 4, 2025 Posted August 4, 2025 Joke: The Good and Bad I finally quit drinking for good... Now I'm just gonna drink for evil. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 4, 2025 Posted August 4, 2025 Joke: 12- Pack A father and his son go into the grocery store when they happen upon the condom aisle. The son asks his father why there are so many different boxes of condoms. The father replies, ''Well, you see that 3-pack? That's for when you're in high school. You have 2 for Friday night and 1 for Saturday night.'' The son then asks his father, ''What's the 6-pack for?'' The father replies, ''Well, that's for when you're in college. You have 2 for Friday night, 2 for Saturday night, and 2 for Sunday morning.'' Then the son asks his father what the 12-pack is for. The father replies, ''Well, that's for when you're married. You have one for January, one for February, one for March, one for.....'' Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 4, 2025 Posted August 4, 2025 Joke: Discharge A young lady walks into a doctor’s clinic. "Doctor I'm suffering from a terrible discharge." The doctor lays her down, lifts up her dress and has a good probe around and asks her, "How does that feel?" The young lady replies, "Oooh doctor, that feels lovely... but the discharge is from my ear!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 4, 2025 Posted August 4, 2025 Joke: A woman places an ad in the local... A woman places an ad in the local newspaper. “Looking for a man with three qualifications: won’t beat me up, won’t run away from me, and is great in bed.” Two days later her doorbell rings. “Hi, I’m Tim. I have no arms so I won’t beat you, and no legs so I won't run away.” “What makes you think you are great in bed?” the woman retorts. Tim replies, “I rang the doorbell, didn’t I?” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 5, 2025 Posted August 5, 2025 Joke: A man walks pass a beggar on the ... A man walks pass a beggar on the corner of the street where he works. The beggar holds out his one hand and the man drops a coin into his hand. One day the man walks pass the beggar again and notices the beggar is holding hold out both his hands. He asks, "Why are you holding out both of your hands?" The beggar replied, "You see sir, business is going so well I decided to open another branch." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 5, 2025 Posted August 5, 2025 Joke: Crash and Burn Two men got out of their cars after they collided at an intersection. One took a flask from his pocket and said to the other, "Here, maybe you'd like a nip to calm your nerves." "Thanks," he said, and took a long pull from the container. "Here, you have one, too," he added, handing back the whiskey. "Well, I'd rather not," said the first. "At least not until after the police have been here." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 5, 2025 Posted August 5, 2025 Joke: A Doggy Fever Your veterinarian won't tell you this but if your dog is running a fever, go to the store and buy some mustard. It's the best thing for a hot dog. yhtang 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 5, 2025 Posted August 5, 2025 Joke: A 97-year old man goes into his... A 97-year old man goes into his doctor's office and says, "Doc, I want my sex drive lowered." "Sir", replied the doctor, "You're 97. Don't you think your sex drive is all in your head?" "You're darned right it is!" replied the old man. "That's why I want it lowered!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 6, 2025 Posted August 6, 2025 Joke: A few moments after the daughter... A few moments after the daughter announced her engagement, her Father asked, "Does this fellow have any money?" "Oh Daddy, you men are all alike," sighing deeply, she replied, "That's exactly what he asked me about you." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 6, 2025 Posted August 6, 2025 Joke: Cough Syrup The owner of a drug store walks in to find a guy leaning heavily against wall. The owner asks the clerk, "What's with that guy over there by the wall?" The clerk says, "Well, he came in here this morning to get something for his cough. I couldn't find the cough syrup, so I gave him an entire bottle of laxative." The owner says, "You idiot! You can't treat a cough with laxatives!" The clerk says, "Oh yeah? Look at him, he's afraid to cough!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 6, 2025 Posted August 6, 2025 Joke: Tough Dog He tells the clerk that he wants a dog. The clerk asks, "What kind of demeanour do you want the dog to have?" The man says, "I'm looking for a guard dog, demeanour the better!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 6, 2025 Posted August 6, 2025 Joke: I Want To Appeal A Case Lawyer: "Judge, I wish to appeal my client’s case on the basis of newly discovered evidence." Judge: "And what is the nature of the new evidence?" Lawyer: "Judge, I discovered that my client still has $500 left." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 7, 2025 Posted August 7, 2025 Joke: A man comes home from a night... A man comes home from a night of drinking with the boys. As he falls through the doorway of his house, his wife snaps at him, “what’s the big idea coming home half drunk?” The man replies, “I’m sorry, honey. I ran out of money.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 7, 2025 Posted August 7, 2025 Joke: After spending all day Sunday After spending all day Sunday watching football on television, a man fell asleep and spent the night in the chair. His wife woke him in the morning. "It's twenty to seven," she called. "Blimey, who scored twenty?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 7, 2025 Posted August 7, 2025 Joke: Fighting for Business The shopkeeper was dismayed when a brand-new business much like his own opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read BEST DEALS. He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his right, and announced its arrival with an even larger sign, reading LOWEST PRICES. The shopkeeper was panicked, until he got an idea. He put the biggest sign of all over his own shop-it read… Main entrance. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 7, 2025 Posted August 7, 2025 Joke: A father and son are out shopping A father and son are out shopping for Christmas presents for their family. The son asks, "What present are my sister and I going to get?" The dad answers, "I got you guys an iPad and iPod." "Wow, thanks," the son replies, "What will you give mom?" The dad says, "Your mom is getting an iRon." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 9, 2025 Posted August 9, 2025 Joke: Things sure have changed... For the first time in many years an old man travelled from his rural town to the city to attend a movie. After buying his ticket, he stopped at the concession stand to purchase some popcorn. Handing the attendant $1.50, he couldn't help but comment, "The last time I came to the movies, popcorn was only 15 cents." "Well, sir," the attendant replied with a grin, "You're really going to enjoy yourself. We have sound now." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 9, 2025 Posted August 9, 2025 Joke: A college student challenged a... A college student challenged a senior citizen, saying it was impossible for their generation to understand his. “You grew up in a different world,” the student said. “Today we have television, jet planes, space travel, nuclear energy, computers…” Taking advantage of a pause in the student’s litany, the geezer said, “You’re right. We didn’t have those things when we were young; so, we invented them! What are you doing for the next generation??” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 9, 2025 Posted August 9, 2025 Joke: No Wool Downstairs A husky foreigner, looking for sex, accepted a prostitute's terms. When she undressed, he noticed that she had no pubic hair. The man shouted, "What, no wool? In my country all women have wool down there." The prostitute snapped back, "What do you want to do, knit or have sex?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 9, 2025 Posted August 9, 2025 Joke: The wedding... Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, "Why is the bride dressed in white?" "Because white is the colour of happiness, and today is the happiest day of her life," her mother tried to explain, keeping it simple. The child thought about this for a moment, then said, "So why's the groom wearing black?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 10, 2025 Posted August 10, 2025 Joke: It's Not A Stretch As I get older, I notice that my wife and my hamstrings have a lot in common. They're both inflexible. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 10, 2025 Posted August 10, 2025 Joke: A pretty young college student... A pretty young college student visited her professor's office after class. She glanced down the hall, closed his door and knelt down before him. "I would do anything to pass this exam," she said. Leaning closer, she whispered seductively, "I mean, I would do anything." He looked down at her and said, "You'll do anything?" "Anything," she replied again. His voice softened. "Anything," he repeated. She smiled and again said, "Anything." His voice turned to a whisper. "Would you...study?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 10, 2025 Posted August 10, 2025 Joke: Virgin wife A recently married couple retire to their honeymoon suite. Before hopping into bed the bride says, "Now honey, you'll be gentle with me won't you. You know that I'm still a virgin." This clearly surprises the man, "What are you saying. Aren't I your third husband?" The woman replied, "Yes, but my first husband was a psychologist and all he liked to do was talk about it. My second husband was a gynaecologist and all he liked to do was look at it. Since you're a lawyer, I'm pretty sure that I'm gonna get screwed!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 10, 2025 Posted August 10, 2025 Joke: Come On, Ride the Train Q: If an electric train is heading north, which way would the steam be coming out? A: There wouldn't be any. It's an electric train. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 11, 2025 Posted August 11, 2025 Joke: Windows frozen, won't open. Wife texts husband on a cold winter morning: "Windows frozen, won't open." Husband texts back: "Gently pour some lukewarm water over it and then gently tap edges with hammer." Wife texts back 10 minutes later: "Computer really messed up now." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 11, 2025 Posted August 11, 2025 Joke: Yesterday I went to the doctor... Yesterday I went to the doctor for my yearly physical. My blood pressure was high, my cholesterol was high, I'd gained some weight, and I didn't feel so hot. My doctor said eating right doesn't have to be complicated and it would solve my physical problems. He said just think in colours. Fill your plate with bright colours: greens, yellows, reds, etc. I went right home and ate an entire bowl of M&M's and sure enough, I felt better immediately. I never knew eating right could be so easy. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 11, 2025 Posted August 11, 2025 Joke: Extra Money This girl needed some money, so she is doing odd-jobs around her neighbourhood. She decides she's not making enough money, so she goes to a rich neighbourhood. She walks up to this house and rings the doorbell. The guy answers and tells her she can paint the porch. He gives her a can of paint and $25. When he goes inside, his wife says, "$25! Does she know that the porch wraps all the way around the house?" "Oh, she'll do fine." the guy says. An hour later, the doorbell rings. It's the girl. She says, "I'm finished. I even had some extra paint, so I put another coat on." The guy is surprised. Then the girl says, "Oh, and by the way, that's not a Porsche, that's a Ferrari." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 11, 2025 Posted August 11, 2025 Joke: Help from Grandma Having been playing outside with his friends, a small boy came into the house and asked: “Grandma, what is it called when two people sleep in the same room and one is on top of the other?” His grandma was surprised to hear such a forthright question from a six-year-old but decided to answer as honestly as she could. “Well,” she said hesitantly, “it’s called sexual intercourse.” “Oh, okay,” said the boy and he ran outside to carry on playing with his friends. A few minutes later, he came back in and said angrily: “Grandma, it isn’t called sexual intercourse. It’s called bunk beds. And Jimmy’s mom would like a word with you!” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 13, 2025 Posted August 13, 2025 Joke: The Gift On the first day of school, the children brought gifts for their teacher. The florist's son brought the teacher a bouquet of flowers. The candy-store owner's daughter gave the teacher a pretty box of candy. Then the liquor-store owner's son brought up a big, heavy box. The teacher lifted it up and noticed that it was leaking a little bit. She touched a drop of the liquid with her finger and tasted it. "Is it wine?" she guessed. "No," the boy replied. She tasted another drop and asked, " Champagne? "No," said the little boy... "It's a puppy!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 13, 2025 Posted August 13, 2025 Joke: Astronaut What do you call a man who doesn't cheat on his wife when he is away on business? An astronaut! Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 13, 2025 Posted August 13, 2025 Joke: How Many Wives? Two little boys were at a wedding when one leaned over to the other and asked, "How many wives can a man have?" His friend answered, "Sixteen... four better, four worse, four richer, and four poorer." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 13, 2025 Posted August 13, 2025 Joke: Three older ladies... Three older ladies were discussing the travails of getting older. One said, "Sometimes I catch myself with a jar of mayonnaise in my hand, in front of the refrigerator, and I can't remember whether I was taking it out or putting it away." The second lady said, "Yes, sometimes I find myself on the landing of the stairs, and I can't remember whether I was on my up, or on my way down." The third lady chimed in, "Well, I'm glad I don't have those problems. Knock on wood." With that, she rapped her knuckles on the table, then said, "That must be the door. I'll get it." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 14, 2025 Posted August 14, 2025 Joke: One summer evening during a violent... One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her small boy into bed. She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a tremor in his voice, "Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?" The mother smiled. "I can't dear," she said. 'I have to sleep in Daddy's room." The little boy replied with a shaking voice, "The big sissy." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 14, 2025 Posted August 14, 2025 Joke: The passengers were leaving the... The passengers were leaving the plane after landing, and one smiling, satisfied passenger paused to congratulate the flight attendant. "Stewardess," he said happily, "I want to compliment you and the crew and especially the captain for getting here right on time. It's not often that an airline gets to where it's going exactly when they claim it will. I'm going to call your home office and let them know how pleased I am." "Why, thank you, sir," the flight attendant answered, "but I think you should know something ... this is yesterday's flight." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted August 14, 2025 Posted August 14, 2025 Joke: Act Your Age When the new activities director for the rec centre walked in, all us retirees quickly took notice. She was 20-something and gorgeous. My buddy whispered, “She makes me wish I was 30 years older.” “Don’t you mean 30 years younger?” I asked. “No. If I were 30 years younger, I’d still never have a chance with a woman like that. If I were 30 years older, it wouldn’t bother me so much.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
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