worldangel Posted October 30, 2025 Posted October 30, 2025 Joke: Two car salesmen were sitting... Two car salesmen were sitting at the bar. One complained to the other, "Boy, business sucks. If I don't sell more cars this month, I'm going to lose my f**king ass!" Too late -- he noticed a beautiful blonde, sitting two stools away. Immediately, he offered apologies for his use of bad language. "That's okay," the blonde replied, "I have a very similar problem... If I don't sell more ass this month, I'm going to lose my f**king car!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 1, 2025 Posted November 1, 2025 Joke: Child’s Birthday Wish Child: "Mom, may I have a bicycle for my birthday?" Mom: "Will it make you behave any better if I do?" Child: "No, but I’ll behave over a wider area." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 1, 2025 Posted November 1, 2025 Joke: Over The Hill 1. You know you're over the hill when you are arranging your hair instead of combing it. 2. You know you're over the hill when your idea of a good workout is standing up. 3. You know you're over the hill when you start picking your teeth out of the popcorn. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 1, 2025 Posted November 1, 2025 Joke: A man and his wife were sitting... A man and his wife were sitting in the living room and he said to her, "Just so you know, I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug." His wife got up, unplugged the TV and threw out all of his beer. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 1, 2025 Posted November 1, 2025 Joke: Honey Pie After a nice dinner the two couples got up from the table. The ladies went into the kitchen and the men went into the family room. One of the gents said to the other, "I think it is so wonderful how you call your wife, "honey pie" and "sweet pea", and "sugar" all the time. The other gent said, "Well to tell you the truth, four years ago, I forget her name." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 3, 2025 Posted November 3, 2025 Joke: Son : Mom, when I was on the bus ... Son : Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady. Mom : Well, you have done the right thing. Son : But Mom, I was sitting on Daddy's lap! Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 3, 2025 Posted November 3, 2025 Joke: Do Your Boobs? One day this guy named Dan was sitting in class next to a really hot girl named Jen. He was a dork but had a huge crush on Jen. Dan wanted to tell her about his crush on her but didn't know how to. So he said "Are your boobs so hard that when you touch them your fingers start bleeding?" Jen was totally grossed out and said in reply "I guess you've never seen boobs before" **The End** Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 3, 2025 Posted November 3, 2025 Joke: Hamburger A man walks into a hamburger shop and orders a regular meal. Later, the waitress brings his meal to him. He takes a bite out of it, and notices there's a small hair in the hamburger. He begins yelling frantically at the waitress, "Waitress, there's a hair in my hamburger! I demand to see what is going on!" So, the waitress takes him back where the cook is and to his demise, he sees the cook take the meat patty and flatten it under his arm pit. He says, "That's disgusting!" Then the waitress says, "You think that's disgusting you should see him make donuts." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 3, 2025 Posted November 3, 2025 Joke: Send in help A guy calls the hospital and a nurse answers the phone. The guy said, "Send in help because my wife is going into labour." The nurse said, "Is this her first child?" The guy replied, "No, this is her husband." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 4, 2025 Posted November 4, 2025 Joke: While shopping for vacation clothes ... While shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a display of bathing suits. It had been at least ten years and twenty pounds since I had even considered buying a bathing suit, so sought my husband's advice. "What do you think?" I asked. "Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one?" "Better get a bikini," he replied. "You'd never get it all in one." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 4, 2025 Posted November 4, 2025 Joke: Please stand up One day a college professor of Psychology was greeting his new college class. He stood up in front of the class and said, "Would everyone who thinks he or she is stupid please stand up?" After a minute or so of silence, a young man stood up. "Well, good morning. So, you actually think you're a moron?" the professor asked. The kid replied, "No sir, I just didn't want to see you standing there all by yourself." shyc 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 4, 2025 Posted November 4, 2025 Joke: I'm nervous... "I'm nervous... I've never been with a prostitute before..." "It's alright baby, just tell me what you like." "I like turtles." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 4, 2025 Posted November 4, 2025 Joke: A nice girl I met a nice girl at a bar last night and asked her to call me when she made it home. She must be homeless. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 5, 2025 Posted November 5, 2025 Joke; Please Advise The School teacher sent home a note with her student. The note reads,”Your son is an obedient and bright student, but spends too much time talking to girls.” Mother sends a note back the following day, ”Please advise a solution. Father has the same problem.' Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 5, 2025 Posted November 5, 2025 Joke: Finding someone you love Finding someone you love and who loves you back is a wonderful, wonderful feeling. But finding a true soul mate is an even better feeling. A soul mate is someone who understands you like no other, loves you like no other, will be there for you forever, no matter what. They say that nothing lasts forever, but I am a firm believer in the fact that for some, love lives on even after we’re gone. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 5, 2025 Posted November 5, 2025 Joke: Bad Date After being with her all evening, the man couldn't take another minute with his blind date. Earlier, he had secretly arranged to have a friend call him to the phone so he would have an excuse to leave if something like this happened. When he returned to the table, he lowered his eyes, put on a grim expression and said, "I have some bad news. My grandfather just died." "Thank heavens," his date replied. "If yours hadn't, mine would have had to!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 5, 2025 Posted November 5, 2025 Joke: True or false? A little kid's in school, taking a true-false test and he's flipping a coin. At the end of the test he's flipping the coin again. The teacher says, "What are you doing?" He says, "Checking my answers." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 6, 2025 Posted November 6, 2025 Joke: The seven-year old girl told her ... The seven-year old girl told her mom, "A boy in my class asked me to play doctor." "Oh, dear," the mother nervously sighed. "What happened, honey?" "Nothing, he made me wait 45 minutes and then double-billed the insurance company." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 6, 2025 Posted November 6, 2025 Joke: Things sure have changed... For the first time in many years, an old man travelled from his rural town to the city to attend a movie. After buying his ticket, he stopped at the concession stand to purchase some popcorn. Handing the attendant $1.50, he couldn't help but comment, "The last time I came to the movies, popcorn was only 15 cents." "Well, sir," the attendant replied with a grin, "You're really going to enjoy yourself. We have sound now." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 6, 2025 Posted November 6, 2025 Joke: Paying For His Mistake A husband and wife had a big argument. Frustrated and fed up, the wife called up her mom and said, "We fought again, I can't do this anymore. I am coming to live with you." Mom said, "No darling, he must pay for his mistake. I am coming to live with you." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 6, 2025 Posted November 6, 2025 Joke: FOR SALE BY OWNER FOR SALE BY OWNER Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. 45 volumes. Excellent condition. $1,000.00 or best offer. No longer needed. Got married last weekend. Wife knows everything. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 7, 2025 Posted November 7, 2025 Joke: How to Produce Ugly Children Q: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? A: Ask your Mom. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 7, 2025 Posted November 7, 2025 Joke: Old Man Hot Mama An old hearing impaired gentleman visited his doctor and he had been warned to be careful as he had a heart murmur. The doctor was therefore most surprised to see the old fellow out on the town, whooping it up. He got his attention and took him aside. "Don't you remember what I told you the other day?" he inquired. "Oh, I surely do." the old gent replied, "Best dang advice I ever had. I did just as you said. I got me a hot mama and I'm cheerful" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 7, 2025 Posted November 7, 2025 Joke: Math teacher I've decided to become a math teacher, but I'm only going to teach subtraction. I just want to make a difference. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 7, 2025 Posted November 7, 2025 Joke: A distraught senior citizen ... A distraught senior citizen phoned her doctor's office. 'Is it true,' she wanted to know, 'that the medication you prescribed has to be taken for the rest of my life?' 'Yes, I'm afraid so,' the doctor told her. There was a moment of silence before the senior lady replied, 'I'm wondering, then, just how serious is my condition because this prescription is marked 'NO REFILLS'.' Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 8, 2025 Posted November 8, 2025 Joke: I'm lost A small boy was lost, so he went up to a policeman and said, "I've lost my dad!" The policeman said, "What's he like?" The little boy replied, "Chips and beer." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 8, 2025 Posted November 8, 2025 Joke: How much? A man meets a woman at a bar and asks her "Would you have sex with me for 10 million dollars?" Without skipping a beat she screams "Yes!" The man then asks "What about for $20?" She looks at him sideways and says "What do you think I am, a whore?" The man says "We've already established that you are, now we're just negotiating." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 8, 2025 Posted November 8, 2025 Joke: Wrong Way As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife’s voice urgently warning him. “Herman, I just heard on the news that there’s a car going the wrong way on 280 interstate. Please be careful!” “It’s not just one car,” said Herman. “It’s hundreds of them!” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 8, 2025 Posted November 8, 2025 Joke: Diagnosis The man told his doctor that he wasn't able to do all the things around the house that he used to do. When the examination was complete, he said, "Now, Doc, I can take it. Tell me in plain English what is wrong with me." "Well, in plain English," the doctor replied, "you're just lazy." "Okay," said the man. "Now give me the medical term so I can tell my wife." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 9, 2025 Posted November 9, 2025 Joke: Blind Man Husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop with their nine children. A blind man joins them after a few minutes. When the bus arrives, they find it overloaded and only the wife and the nine kids are able to fit onto the bus. So the husband and the blind man decide to walk. After a while, the husband gets irritated by the ticking of the stick of the blind man as he taps it on the sidewalk, and says to him, "Why don't you put a piece of rubber at the end of your stick? That ticking sound is driving me crazy." The blind man replies, "If you would've put a rubber at the end of YOUR stick, we'd be riding the bus ... so shut up." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 9, 2025 Posted November 9, 2025 Joke: The new baby A young mother finds out she is pregnant again, and she tells the good news to anyone who will listen. One day when the woman and the boy are out shopping, a friend of the mother asks the little boy if he was excited about the new baby. "Oh, yes!" the little tyke says. And having overheard some of his parents' private conversations, he adds, "And I know what we are going to name it, too. If it's a girl we're going to call it Mary, and if it's another boy we're going to call it Quits." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 9, 2025 Posted November 9, 2025 Joke: The man's pants zip... “The man's pants zipper broke, but he fixed it on the fly.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 9, 2025 Posted November 9, 2025 Joke: The Hard Worker Boss: "Working hard here, Jimmy?" Jimmy: "Ever since I heard you coming down the stairs, boss!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 10, 2025 Posted November 10, 2025 Joke: Alfie was listening to his sister... Alfie was listening to his sister practice her singing. "Sis," he said, "I wish you'd sing Christmas carols." "Thats nice of you, Alfie," she replied, "but why?" Alfie replied, "Because then I'd only have to hear your voice once a year!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 10, 2025 Posted November 10, 2025 Joke: A cocky State Highways employee... A cocky State Highways employee stopped at a farm and talked with an old farmer. He told the farmer, "I need to inspect your farm for a possible new road." The old farmer said, "OK, but don't go in that field." The Highways employee said, "I have the authority of the State Government to go where I want. See this card? I am allowed to go wherever I wish on farm land." So the old farmer went about his farm chores. Later, he heard loud screams and saw the State Highways employee running for the fence and close behind was the farmer's prize bull. The bull was madder than a nest full of hornets and the bull was gaining on the employee at every step!! The old farmer called out, "Show him your card!!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 10, 2025 Posted November 10, 2025 Joke: My Wife a Chicken A man runs to the doctor and says, "Doctor, you've got to help me. My wife thinks she's a chicken!" The doctor asks, "How long has she had this condition?" "Two years," says the man. "Then why did it take you so long to come and see me?" asked the shrink. The man shrugs his shoulders and replies, "We needed the eggs." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 10, 2025 Posted November 10, 2025 Joke: Foreman One day, Uncle Joe got fired from his construction job. His nephew asked him what happened. “You know what a foreman is?” he asked. “The one who stands around and watches the other men work?” “What’s that got to do with it?” he asked. “Well, he just got jealous of me,” Uncle Joe explained. “Everyone thought I was the foreman.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 11, 2025 Posted November 11, 2025 Joke: Foreman One day, Uncle Joe got fired from his construction job. His nephew asked him what happened. “You know what a foreman is?” he asked. “The one who stands around and watches the other men work?” “What’s that got to do with it?” he asked. “Well, he just got jealous of me,” Uncle Joe explained. “Everyone thought I was the foreman.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 11, 2025 Posted November 11, 2025 Joke: I've Learned My Lesson I was driving home from work when I was pulled over for not wearing a seat belt. Three days later, I got the same ticket, at the same stop, from the same cop. “So, have you learned anything?” asked the cop. “Yes, I have,” I began. “I’ve learned it's time to find a new way home from work.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 11, 2025 Posted November 11, 2025 Joke: Trying to win a Nobel Prize A man is driving down a country road, when he spots a farmer standing in the middle of a huge field of grass. He pulls the car over to the side of the road and notices that the farmer is just standing there, doing nothing, looking at nothing. The man gets out of the car, walks all the way out to the farmer and asks him, "Ah excuse me mister, but what are you doing?" The farmer replies, "I'm trying to win a Nobel Prize." "How?" asks the man, puzzled. "Well I heard they give the Nobel Prize to people who are out standing in their field." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 11, 2025 Posted November 11, 2025 Joke: Invisible patient - Doctor, there is a patient on line 1 that say he's invisible. - Well, tell him I can't see him right now. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 12, 2025 Posted November 12, 2025 Joke: I don't run from my problems I don't run from my problems. I sit on my couch, play on my phone and ignore them like all the other adults. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 12, 2025 Posted November 12, 2025 Joke: Bubba and Junior were standing... Bubba and Junior were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking up. A woman walked by and asked what they were doing. "We're supposed to find the height of the flagpole," said Bubba, "but we don't have a ladder." The woman took a wrench from her purse, loosened a few bolts, and laid the pole down. Then she took a tape measure from her pocket, took a measurement, announced, "Eighteen feet, six inches," and walked away. Junior shook his head and laughed. "Ain't that just like a dumb blonde! We ask for the height, and she gives us the length!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 12, 2025 Posted November 12, 2025 Joke: Growing penis When the man first noticed that his penis was growing longer, he was delighted. But several weeks and several inches later, he became concerned and went to see a urologist. While his wife waited outside, the physician examined him and explained that, thought rare his condition could be corrected by minor surgery. The patient's wife anxiously rushed up to the doctor after the examination and was told of the diagnosis and the need for surgery. "How long will he be on crutches?" she asked. "Crutches???" the doctor asked. "Well, yes," the woman said "You are going to lengthen his legs, aren't you?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 12, 2025 Posted November 12, 2025 Joke: Shrinking Clothes Pete went into the doctor's office for his annual checkup, and the Doc asked if there was anything unusual he should know about. So Pete told the Doc that his suit must have shrunk over the last year, because it didn't fit when he went to get ready for a wedding recently. The Doc said, "Suits don't shrink just sitting in a closet. You probably put on a few pounds." "That's just it, Doc, I know I haven't gained a single pound since the last time I wore it." "Well, then," said Doc, "You must have a case of Furniture Disease." "What in the world is Furniture Disease?" asked Pete. "That's when your chest starts sliding down into your drawers.". Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 13, 2025 Posted November 13, 2025 Joke: Rude Wife Ever since I needed a wheelchair, my wife has been so rude to me. She's been pushing me around and talking behind my back Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 13, 2025 Posted November 13, 2025 Joke: Two lawyers... Two lawyers walking through the woods spotted a vicious-looking bear. The first lawyer immediately opened his briefcase, pulled out a pair of sneakers and started putting them on. The second lawyer looked at him and said, "You're crazy! You'll never be able to outrun that bear!" "I don't have to," the first lawyer replied. "I only have to outrun you." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 13, 2025 Posted November 13, 2025 Joke: The Florist A new business was opening and one of the owner's friends wanted to send him flowers for the occasion. They arrived at the new business site and the owner read the card, which said: 'Rest in Peace.' The owner was angry and called the florist to complain. After he had told the florist of the obvious mistake and how angry he was, the florist replied: 'Sir, I'm really sorry for the mistake, but rather than getting angry, you should imagine this - somewhere, there is a funeral taking place today, and they have flowers with a note saying: 'Congratulations on your new location!'' Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 13, 2025 Posted November 13, 2025 Joke: Parents explaining body parts A family is at the dinner table. The son asks the father, “Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?” The father, surprised, answers. “Well, son, a woman goes through three phases. In her 20s, a woman’s breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her 30s and 40s, they are like pears, still nice, hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions.” “Onions?” the son asks. “Yes. You see them and they make you cry.” This infuriated his wife and daughter. The daughter asks, “Mom, how many different kinds of willies are there?” The mother smiles and says, “Well, dear, a man goes through three phases also. In his 20s, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his 30s and 40s, it’s like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his 50s, it’s like a Christmas tree.” “A Christmas tree?” the daughter asks. “Yes, dead from the root up and the balls are just for decoration.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted November 14, 2025 Posted November 14, 2025 Joke: Winding up the tough guy I was sitting at a bar one time, when I noticed that, next to me, an old drunk was hassling one of the biggest, toughest guys I'd ever seen. The old guy was clearly blasted, and kept getting in the tough guy's face, say, "I fucked your mother." Despite being huge and jacked, the tough guy just kept shrugging it off. The old guy laughed in the tough guy's face, saying it again. "Hey, I fucked your mother." Then, the old man even poked him, and repeated himself, "No seriously, I fucked your mother." At this point, finally, the tough guy had had enough. He grabbed the old man by his jacket and began to pull him out of the bar, yelling, "That's it. We're going home, Dad. You're drunk." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
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