worldangel Posted October 16, 2025 Posted October 16, 2025 Joke: Human and Goat DNA What do you get when you cross human DNA with goat DNA? Kicked out of the petting zoo. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 16, 2025 Posted October 16, 2025 Joke: A Rubik's Cube and A Penis What do a Rubik's Cube and a penis have in common? The more you play with it, the harder it gets. shyc 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 16, 2025 Posted October 16, 2025 Joke: Two Quarts Mesmerized by the automatic milking machine, the pubescent young boy decided to place his member in one of the slots and have it milk him. The experiment proved highly successful, but when he was finished, he was unable to liberate himself. Unwillingly he called for his father. After examining the situating, the farmer headed for his truck. “Where are you going?” the boy cried. “To town, to get oysters. That machine there is set at two quarts.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 17, 2025 Posted October 17, 2025 Joke: Why are you crying? Two guys were sitting outside a medical clinic. One of them was crying, tears were pouring down his face. The other guy asked, "Why are you crying?" The first one replied, "I came here for blood test." The second one asked, "So? Why are you crying? Are you afraid?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 17, 2025 Posted October 17, 2025 Joke: Trouble hearing.... A little old man starts having trouble hearing and goes to the doctor.....says. "Doc, I'm having problems hearing!" Doctor says "Let’s check this out." Looks into the man's ear with his flash light and says, "There's a foreign object in here." Takes his tweezers and pulls it out.......Doc says to the old man, "It's a suppository!!" The old man takes a look, asks the Doc, "Can I use your phone?? Need to tell the wife that I know where I put that hearing aid!!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 17, 2025 Posted October 17, 2025 Joke: Which Does He Choose? A guy is dating three women and can't decide which one to marry. He gives each $1,000 to see how well they can manage money. The first one spends $800 and puts $200 in the bank. The second one spends $200 and puts $800 in the bank. The third one puts the whole $1,000 in the bank. Which one does he end up marrying? The one with the biggest boobs. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 17, 2025 Posted October 17, 2025 Joke: A Cheap Circumcision What do you call a cheap circumcision? A rip-off. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 18, 2025 Posted October 18, 2025 Joke: A young man proposes marriage... A young man proposes marriage to his sweetheart. The girl replies, "If I marry you, will you promise to give up smoking?" "Yes, I will," came the reply. "And drinking?" "I will give up drinking as well." "And going to the club with your cronies?" "Yes, I will." "And what else will you give up for my sake?" she asked finally. "I have already given up the idea of marrying you." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 18, 2025 Posted October 18, 2025 Joke: A guy fell asleep on the beach... A guy fell asleep on the beach for several hours and got horrible sunburn, specifically to his upper legs. He went to the hospital, and was promptly admitted after being diagnosed with second-degree burns. With his skin already starting to blister, and the severe pain he was in, the doctor prescribed continuous intravenous feeding with saline, electrolytes, a sedative, and a Viagra pill every four hours. The nurse, who was rather astounded, asked, "What good will Viagra do for him, Doctor?" The doctor replied, "It won't do anything for his condition, but it'll keep the sheets off his legs." shyc 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 18, 2025 Posted October 18, 2025 Joke: Go to school! Mom was trying to get her son to get out of bed and get ready for school. "I am not going to school!" the son responded defiantly. "Why not?" Mom wanted to know. "Well, first of all I hate school and second of all ..the kid all hate me!!" was the answer. "Son, that's not good reasons .. you will have to get up and ready for school!" Mom replied. "Well, give me two good reasons why I should," the son said. "Well," Mom said quietly, "First of all you are 52 years old and second of all...You are the Principal." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 18, 2025 Posted October 18, 2025 Joke: Saving Money "Hey, cabby! How much to take me to the station?" "Five bucks, sir." "And how much for my suitcase?" "No charge for the suitcase, sir." "Okay. Take the case and I'll walk." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 19, 2025 Posted October 19, 2025 Joke: Password A female secretary was helping her new boss set up his computer and asked him what word he would like to use as a password to log in with. Wanting to embarrass his new secretary a bit and let her know where they stood, he smugly told her to enter 'penis.' Without blinking or saying a word, she entered the password. She then almost died laughing at the computer's response: PASSWORD REJECTED. NOT LONG ENOUGH! shyc 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 19, 2025 Posted October 19, 2025 Joke: Black Powder A guy enters a bank to see about getting a business loan. "What kind of business do you want to start?" asks the bank manager. "I have some black powder. You sprinkle it on a women's vagina and it makes it taste like a peach." "I don't think we can give you a loan." he replied. So the guy left. A few months later he went into the bank with a wheel barrel filled with money. The same bank manager said, "Congratulations, I guess that idea for black powder really paid off." "Nah, that didn't go anywhere. I made my money with this white powder." "Really," replied the bank manager. "What does it do?" "Give me a peach and I'll show you." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 19, 2025 Posted October 19, 2025 Joke: Competition at the retirement home An old man and an old woman are together every night. They aren't married, but for years and years they have spent every night together. All they ever do is sit on the couch buck naked and watch TV while she holds his weiner. Every night, like clockwork, they do this - sit on the couch watching TV while she holds his weiner. One night he doesn't show up. Then a second night goes by - no show. She calls him up. "Where you been?" "Oh ... I've been down at what's her name's." "What are you doing there?" "Pretty much the same thing we do - sitting naked on the couch watching TV while she holds my weiner." "Well, what does she have that I don't have?" "Parkinson's." shyc 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 19, 2025 Posted October 19, 2025 Joke: A child comes home from his first ... A child comes home from his first day at school. His mother asks, "Well, what did you learn today?" The kid replies, "Not enough. They want me to come back tomorrow." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 21, 2025 Posted October 21, 2025 Joke: A week after their marriage, the ... A week after their marriage, the Redneck newlyweds paid a visit to their doctor..." I can't figure it out doc, and I'm really worried," said the husband." My testicles are turning blue." "That's pretty unusual," said the doctor. "Let me examine you." The doctor takes a look. Sure enough, the Redneck's testicles are blue. The doctor turns to the wife. "Are you using the diaphragm that I prescribed?" "Yes, I am," she replied. "And what kind of jelly are you using with it?" "Grape" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 21, 2025 Posted October 21, 2025 Joke: A woman was found guilty in traffic... A woman was found guilty in traffic court and when asked for her occupation she said she was a schoolteacher. The judge rose from the bench. "Madam, I have waited years for a schoolteacher to appear before this court." He smiled with delight. "Now sit down at that table and write 'I will not run a red light' five hundred times." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 21, 2025 Posted October 21, 2025 Joke: The doctor... The doctor entered the room and advised his patient that a brain transplant was the only remedy. "Fortunately" he continued, "this hospital has perfected the procedure, however, it is not yet available on the National Health and you will therefore have to pay. We have two brains in stock at the moment, a female brain costing £30,000 and a male brain at £100,000" "Why is the male brain so expensive?" asked the patient. "Oh, that's easy, male brains are hardly used." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 21, 2025 Posted October 21, 2025 Joke: Fourth Husband A woman announces to her friend that she is getting married for the fourth time. "How wonderful! But I hope you don't mind me asking what happened to your first husband?" "He ate poisonous mushrooms and died." "Oh, how tragic! What about your second husband?" "He ate poisonous mushrooms too and died." "Oh, how terrible! I'm almost afraid to ask you about your third husband." "He died of a broken neck." "A broken neck?" "He wouldn't eat the mushrooms." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 22, 2025 Posted October 22, 2025 Joke: A truck driver was driving along ... A truck driver was driving along the freeway saw a sign that read, 'Low Bridge overhead' but, before he could stop, the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets stuck under it. Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a police officer approaches, puts his hands on his hips, and says, "Got stuck - huh?" "No," the truck driver says, "I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 22, 2025 Posted October 22, 2025 Joke: A Moral Question One man said to another, "I didn't sleep with my wife before I got married. How about you?" The man replied, "I don't know. What was her maiden name?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 22, 2025 Posted October 22, 2025 Joke: During their silver anniversary... During their silver anniversary, a wife reminded her husband: "Do you remember when you proposed to me, I was so overwhelmed that I didn't talk for an hour?" The husband replied: "Yes, honey, that was the happiest hour of my life." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 22, 2025 Posted October 22, 2025 Joke: Sex Before Marriage Sex before marriage is considered a sin... Sex after marriage is considered a miracle! Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 24, 2025 Posted October 24, 2025 Joke: Award Winner My dentist was voted "Dentist Of The Year".... He didn't get a trophy, they just gave him a little plaque. yhtang 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 24, 2025 Posted October 24, 2025 Joke: 9-1-1, what is your emergency? "9-1-1, what is your emergency?" "Help! I was hunting in the woods with my friend, and he suddenly dropped dead for no reason! Oh my Goodness, I'm freaking out!!" "Calm down, sir, we'll get you through this. The first thing we need to do is make sure that your friend really is dead." "All right, hold on a second." BLAM! "Okay, now what?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 24, 2025 Posted October 24, 2025 Joke: Problem remedy A woman goes to see her doctor and explains that every time she sneezes, she has a massive climax. "Are you taking anything for it?" her doctor asks. "Yes," she replies: "Pepper." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 24, 2025 Posted October 24, 2025 Joke: Have It Made People say that money is not the key to happiness... But I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 25, 2025 Posted October 25, 2025 Joke: Home in no time A woman was waiting in the checkout line at a shopping center. Her arms were heavily laden with a mop and broom and other cleaning supplies. By her actions and deep sighs, it was obvious she was in a hurry and not happy about the slowness of the line. When the cashier called for a price check on a box of soap, the woman remarked indignantly, "Well, I'll be lucky to get out of here and home before Christmas!" "Don't worry, ma'am," replied the clerk. "With that wind kicking up out there and that brand new broom you have here, you'll be home in no time." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 25, 2025 Posted October 25, 2025 Joke: A Walking Economy This guy is walking with his friend, who happens to be a psychologist. He says to this friend, "I'm a walking economy." The friend asks, "How so?" "My hair line is in recession, my stomach is a victim of inflation, and both of these together are putting me into a deep depression!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 25, 2025 Posted October 25, 2025 Joke: New secretary A guy walked into his friend's office, he found him sitting at his desk, looking very depressed. "Hey, what's up with you?", he asks. "Oh, its my wife," replied the man sadly. "She's hired a new secretary for me." "Well, nothing wrong in that. Is she blonde or brunette?" "Neither, He's bald." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 25, 2025 Posted October 25, 2025 Joke: Bad Advice I went to the doctors recently. He said, "Don't eat anything fatty." I said, "What, like bacon and burgers?" He said, "No, I mean you, Fatty, don't eat anything!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 26, 2025 Posted October 26, 2025 Joke: Birth control pills An elderly woman went into the doctor's office. When the doctor asked why she was there, she replied, "I'd like to have some birth-control pills." Taken aback, the doctor thought for a minute and then said, "Excuse me, Mrs. Smith, but you're 72 years old. What possible use could you have for birth control pills?" The woman responded, "They help me sleep better." The doctor thought some more and continued, "How in the world do birth control pills help you to sleep?" The woman said, "Simple. I put them in my granddaughter's orange juice every morning and I sleep better at night." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 26, 2025 Posted October 26, 2025 Joke: Are You Eating Right A woman goes to her doctor. She has a breadstick up her nose, a potato in her right ear and string bean in her left ear. She says, "Doctor, can you help me? I don't feel well, and I cannot figure out what's wrong." The doctor replies; "Well, you are clearly not eating properly." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 26, 2025 Posted October 26, 2025 Joke: Whiskey no worms A man drinks a shot of whiskey every night before bed. After years of this the wife wants him to quit, so she gets 2 shot glasses, filling 1 with water the other with whiskey. She gets him to the table with the glasses and has his bait box there too. She says "I want you to see this." She puts a worm in the water it swims around. She puts a worm in the whiskey and the worm dies. She says "so what do you have to say about this experiment?" He says "IF I DRINK WHISKEY I WON'T GET WORMS!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 26, 2025 Posted October 26, 2025 Joke: Two men were talking... Two men were talking. "So, how's your sex life?" "Oh, nothing special. I'm having Social Security sex." "Social Security sex?" "Yeah, you know, I get a little each month, but not enough to live on.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 27, 2025 Posted October 27, 2025 Joke: A police officer sees a man driving ... A police officer sees a man driving around with a pickup truck full of penguins. He pulls the guy over and says, "You can't drive around with penguins in this town! Take them to the zoo immediately." The guy says okay, and drives away. The next day, the officer sees the guy still driving around with the truck full of penguins -- and they're all wearing sunglasses. He pulls the guy over and demands, "I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo yesterday?" The guy replies, "I did. Today I'm taking them to the beach!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 27, 2025 Posted October 27, 2025 Joke: Price Check on Tampax When Jane reached the checkout counter, she learned that one of her items had no price tag. Imagine her embarrassment when the checker got on the intercom and boomed out for all the store to hear, "Price check on Tampax, supersize please." As if that was not bad enough, somebody at the rear of the store misunderstood the word "Tampax" for "thumbtacks." In a business-like tone, a voice boomed back over the intercom, "Do you want the kind you push in with your thumb or the kind you pound in with a hammer?" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 27, 2025 Posted October 27, 2025 Joke: It was the middle of the night... It was the middle of the night. Suddenly there was a loud rapping on the doctor’s door, followed by a groan. The doctor angrily thrust his head out of the window. “WELL?” he shouted. “No,” moaned the man. “Sick.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 27, 2025 Posted October 27, 2025 Joke: Porn movies Why do men like to watch porno movies backward? They like the part where the hooker gives the money back. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 28, 2025 Posted October 28, 2025 Joke: Both Sides Of The Law A police officer arrives at the scene of an accident, in which a car smashed into a tree. The cop rushes over to the vehicle and asks the driver, 'Are you seriously hurt?' 'How should I know?' the man answers, 'I'm not a lawyer!' Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 28, 2025 Posted October 28, 2025 Joke: A distraught senior citizen ... A distraught senior citizen phoned her doctor's office. 'Is it true,' she wanted to know, 'that the medication you prescribed has to be taken for the rest of my life?' 'Yes, I'm afraid so,' the doctor told her. There was a moment of silence before the senior lady replied, 'I'm wondering, then, just how serious is my condition because this prescription is marked 'NO REFILLS'.' Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 28, 2025 Posted October 28, 2025 Joke: Rosebuds The teenage granddaughter comes downstairs for her date with this see-through blouse on and no bra. Her grandmother just has a fit, telling her not to dare go out like that. The teenager tells her "Loosen up Grams. These are modern times. You gotta let your rosebuds show!" and out she goes. The next day the teenager comes downstairs, and the grandmother is sitting there with no top on. The teenager wants to die. She explains to her grandmother that she has friends coming over and that it is just not appropriate. "Loosen up, sweetie. If you can show off your rosebuds, then I can display my hanging baskets." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 28, 2025 Posted October 28, 2025 Joke: Late Bus Two old women were sitting on a bench waiting for their bus. The buses were running late, and a lot of time passed. Finally, one woman turned to the other and said, "You know, I've been sitting here so long, my butt fell asleep!'. The other woman turned to her and said "I know! I heard it snoring!" leckmich 1 Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 29, 2025 Posted October 29, 2025 Joke: How good was I? A guy meets a girl out at a nightclub and she invites him back to her place for the night, her parents are out of town and this is the perfect opportunity. They get back to her house and they go into her bedroom, and when the guy walks in the door he notices all these fluffy toys. There's hundreds of them, fluffy toys on top of the wardrobe, fluffy toys on the bookshelf and window sill, there's more on the floor, and of course fluffy toys all over the bed. Later, after they've had sex, he turns to her and asks, "So, how was I?" She says, "Well, you can take anything from the bottom shelf." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 29, 2025 Posted October 29, 2025 Joke: Being rude is easy Being rude is easy. It does not take any effort and is a sign of weakness and insecurity. Kindness shows great self-discipline and strong self-esteem. Being kind is not always easy when dealing with rude people. Kindness is a sign of a person who has done a lot of personal work and has come to a great self-understanding and wisdom. Choose to be kind over being right and you’ll be right every time because kindness is a sign of STRENGTH. Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 29, 2025 Posted October 29, 2025 Joke: A bar owner locked up his place... A bar owner locked up his place at 2 AM and went home to sleep. He had been in bed only a few minutes when the phone rang. “What time do you open up in the morning?” he heard an obviously inebriated man inquire. The owner was so furious, he slammed down the receiver and went back to bed. A few minutes later there was another call and he heard the same voice ask the same question. “Listen, the owner shouted, “there’s no sense in asking me what time I open because I wouldn’t let a person in your condition in—“ “I don’t want to get in,” the caller interjected. “I want to get out.” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 29, 2025 Posted October 29, 2025 Joke: Life choices... An older man was married to a younger woman. After several years of a very happy marriage, he had a heart attack. The doctor advised him that in order to prolong his life, they should cut out sex. He and his wife discussed the matter and decided that he should sleep in the family room downstairs to save them both from temptation. One night, after several weeks of this, he decided that life without sex wasn't worth living. So he headed upstairs. He met his wife on the staircase and said, "I was coming to die." She laughed and replied, "I was just coming down to kill you!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 30, 2025 Posted October 30, 2025 Joke: New Secretary The real estate boss got a hot new secretary. Afraid of sexual harassment issues he held himself off for a week, but finally overcome with lust, he decided to put some moves on her. But within a few weeks, he is feeling displeased at the way she is working, not caring, coming to work late, and so on. So, he pulls her aside, and has a little talk with her. "Listen, baby, we may have gone to bed together a few times, but who said you could start coming in late and slacking off?" Looking him in the eyes, she replied, "My lawyer!" Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 30, 2025 Posted October 30, 2025 Joke: The Diving Board A man was on the very top diving board of a swimming pool. He was poised, he lifted his arms, and was about to dive in when the attendant came running up, shouting, “Don’t dive, there’s no water in that pool!” “That’s all right!” said the man. “I can’t swim!” Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
worldangel Posted October 30, 2025 Posted October 30, 2025 Joke: Bad Breath We should have a way of telling people when they have bad breath. Something like, "Well, I'm bored... let's go brush our teeth." Or, "I've got to make a phone call, hold this gum in your mouth for me, will you." Quote a good oral sex makes your day, a good anal sex makes your "hole weak"
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